A/N: I forgot to put a disclaimer earlier. Ya'll know that I don't own any of this…. Thank you for the comments! I try to answer a smattering of the ones I get after each chapter. I need to be one of those awesome writers who thanks EVERY single person and I am hoping to get there eventually. I just get continually interrupted most of the time!

Katertots – thanks for reading the part of this I sent you last night! I didn't change that part very much.

Pulling out of his mother's driveway that Saturday morning, Puck was pretty sure his ears were bleeding due to the intensity of the bitching he had just been subjected to once he told her that not only had he gotten some strange chick pregnant but that he had also married her. His mother's screeching only ratcheted down about a decibel after he showed her his bank account balance, which he thought was pretty fucking sweet. Needless to say, his mother was pissed. He didn't think she had been this pissed since he wrecked her car when he was 17. After berating him for a solid hour and even insulting his sperm (what the hell?) he excused himself and got the fuck out of there before he ended up strangling her with the water hose. She let him know that she was going to be over to his new house in EXACTLY ONE HOUR to meet the little harlot that he impregnated. He definitely wanted to warn Rachel. He may not even know the girl, let alone like her, but she deserved to be warned because his mother could be a fire-breathing dragon that flew by broomstick. He loved his mother but that didn't mean that she didn't scare him shitless.

He pulled back into his driveway (he still couldn't get over the fact that he even had a driveway) and hurriedly ran into the house. He almost yelled out "Honey, I'm home!" but didn't want to piss her off before he had even seen her face this morning. After their little exchange before bed the previous evening, she was more apt to kick him in the balls then throw herself into his arms. Even still, he couldn't help but chuckle at how angry he had made her. He didn't see what the big was, really. She was already pregnant. Talk about the perfect set-up: have his sex partner living in the same house AND she couldn't get pregnant. Maybe he would try to reason with her again in a few days…

He tromped through the lower level of the house, trying to find Rachel. Just when he was about to go check in the backyard, he heard humming coming from her closet. He walked into the bedroom and nudged the door open. She looked up when she noticed the door move slightly.

"Why are you sitting in your closet?" His voice indicated that, at that moment, he thought she was "special."

She screwed up her face in annoyance. "I'm folding socks, obviously."

"That brings up another question: why are you folding your socks?"

She pushed herself up off the floor and bent down to grab her stack of freshly folded socks. "Do you not fold your socks?"

He gave her a crooked smile. "Nope, just throw 'em in a drawer."

"Well, I prefer to be neat and organized."

She opened up her dresser drawer and he whistled. There were rows and rows of panties, neatly folded and sorted by color. He met her eyes, questioning her curiously. "You're really anal, aren't you?"

"Not anal, organized!" she snapped.

He leaned against her dresser. "Whatever. Look…I'm here to warn you that my mom is going to be here in like forty-fucking-five minutes and you may want to prepare yourself. Mom is on the warpath."

Rachel's stomach dropped. "Why is she coming?"

Puck crossed his arms. "Well, she just found out that her angelic her baby boy…that would be me," he pointed to himself for added emphasis, "knocked you up and then married you. I think she thinks that I've been bewitched or some shit. And she's one scary lady so I just want you to say you were warned."

Rachel began pulling out something to wear. "I seriously doubt that she's that horrible, Noah."

Puck snorted. "Uh huh. The woman is evil. I love her because she gave birth to me. Otherwise, I'd probably hit her with my car."

Rachel laughed and looked him in the eye skeptically. He was grinning and she couldn't help but notice how very handsome he was when he smiled (not that he was ugly when he didn't smile!)

"Thank you for warning me, Noah, but I firmly believe that I will have no problem relating to her. I am often able to develop strong rapport with even the most difficult of people simply because I take the time to get to know them."

Rolling his eyes, Puck said, "You think that now…but wait 'til she walks in the door and lays into you for seducing me."

Eyes wide, she yelled, "I didn't seduce you!"

He put his hands up to show her that he meant peace. "I didn't say you did. I'm saying that SHE will say you did…." He thought for a moment. "Back in high school, I dated this chick named Santana. Well, Mom hated her…like wanted her to die hated her. Sure, she did walk in on us fucking on her bed but she hated her before that. Anyway, Mom referred to her as the "Bitchy Skanky She-Devil Whore" – TO HER FACE. REPEATEDLY. Mom made Santana cry, which is a fascinating feat considering Santana eats nails and beats puppies."

Sighing, Rachel said, "I'm sure she's not that bad. Now would you get out of my room so that I can change clothes?"

He sat down on her bed. With a raised eyebrow, he said, "I'm good…go ahead."

"Noah Puckerman. GET. OUT!" She pointed to the door, shaking her finger for emphasis.

He stood and strode from the room, muttering, "fine…."

Approximately a half hour later, Rachel was still in her room, fixing her hair and trying to stop her hands from shaking. As she was deciding on whether to pull her hair up or leave it down (she had already tried both looks twice), she heard the doorbell ring.

"She's heeeeeeere," Noah called out in a singsong voice, like he was announcing the arrival of The Poltergeist.

Rachel took a deep breath and closed her eyes, giving herself a mental pep talk. She heard Noah open the door and begin talking in a low voice to his mother. Opening her eyes again, she surveyed her appearance. Her brown eyes were bright, her makeup impeccably done.

It's now or never, Berry…err…Puckerman.

Rachel stepped out into the hallway and walked toward the voices in the foyer. The moment she stepped into the entryway, talking ceased.

Noah's mother was tall and thin with dark brown hair. Rachel could see where he had inherited his intense eyes.

"Is this her?" His mother asked him in a voice that sounded accusing to Rachel.

"Yep…don't see any other chicks I knocked up standing around."

His mother turned and glared at him. Her son was such a louse, sometimes.

Rachel wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Or perhaps shrink into the floor. Anything to get her the hell out of this present situation.

The woman stepped closer, scrutinizing Rachel without saying a word. Finally, Rachel could stand it no more. Stepping forward, she turned on the charm. "Hello, I'm Rachel. I've heard fabulous things about you."

The woman said nothing at first and then proceeded to burst out laughing. "You're lying, honey. I know for a fact that my son never says anything nice about me. But that's okay…. " Stepping forward, she took Rachel's hand in hers and said, "You're very cute and petite. And honey…are you Jewish?"

Rachel nodded in the affirmative. Noah's mother threw her hands up and said something in Hebrew. Then she grabbed Rachel's head between her hands, squishing Rachel's cheeks up so that she looked like a fish in the process. Rachel was pretty sure that this was where her head would be snapped clean from her body. Instead, the woman said, "Welcome to the family…. My name is Miriam. I am so happy to meet you."

Rachel looked at Noah out of the corner of her eyes. He was standing as still as stone, his mouth hanging open in shock. Miriam followed her gaze over to her son and laughed. "He thinks I'm going to kill you."

Rachel said meekly, "Are you?"

Miriam giggled again. "You are very cute, Rachel Puckerman. Now, show me where my grandbaby will be sleeping!"

Rachel led her to the empty room that had been designated as the nursery. As they stepped inside the doorway, she heard Noah mutter "what the fuck?" under his breath. She couldn't help but smile.

Soon, Rachel was giving Miriam a tour of the entire house. Noah still stood in the foyer, almost convinced that a camera crew was going to jump out and yell "gotcha" at any moment. His mother chooses this woman…the woman he knocked up at a party, to like? What the fuck?

A few minutes passed before the women reappeared. Rachel was smiling a genuine, bright smile that Puck had never seen in all of their married life (24 whole hours.) Miriam stepped up to her son and rambled quickly in one breath, "Rachel and I are going shopping and then we're going to pick up her car at her father's house so we'll be back later be good honey love you bye." Rachel snagged her purse from the table by the door, waggled her fingers at Puck as a goodbye, and followed her mother-in-law out. As Puck watched them leave, he had one thought: I need a beer.

Driving back home after her long day out with Miriam, Rachel was smiling. Really smiling. She had finally found a reason to be excited about this "marriage." She actually had a mother figure around now! Rachel's own mother died of cancer when Rachel was four so she had always been denied the nurturing, maternal touch. And despite Noah's insane warnings that his mother was a snake, Rachel found her to be delightful and sweet. Spending the day with her had given her some private insight into the man that was her husband. It had somehow made her seem him as less course, much more intelligent, and a better human being than she had believed him to be when she woke up this morning.

It was dusk outside when Rachel pulled into the driveway. She was happy to finally have her car at the house…and she was even happier to have a trunk and backseat full of new items to help in her quest of making the house a home. Shopping was so therapeutic. Miriam had insisted they buy an adorable little yellow onesie with a duck on it, even though Rachel was barely six-weeks pregnant. That meant that Rachel now owned her very first baby item. And Rachel was the first to admit that the idea both thrilled and terrified her. That little yellow onesie made EVERYTHING that much more real.

Puck saw Rachel pull up through the open blinds of the living room and muttered fuck me when she hopped out of a Lexus sedan. Leave it to him to marry a woman who owned a Lexus. It made is Ford, even thought it was a Mustang, look like shit.

When Rachel pushed through the door, loaded down with bags and boxes, she was surprised to see four men sitting in her living room, with their feet propped up on her new coffee table, drinking beer and eating popcorn on her new couch.

Noah raised a beer to her in acknowledgement and Finn smiled from the couch. The other two men ogled her to the point where she saw Puck shoot them both a warning glance. Puck motioned for her to come in the living room. Once she was standing by his side, he used beer to say, "You already know Finn. This fuckhead," he said, motioning to the shorter blond man, "is Jimmy, and this one," he pointed to the tall African-American guy, "is Robb."

"N…Nice to meet you," Rachel stuttered.

"Boys…this is my wife," Puck said, trying the word on for size.

All four men then started laughing. Rachel glared. Robb stepped forward and explained, "Sorry. We're just kinda…shocked. Puck is… well… Puck is Puck and the idea of him married is…"

Rachel cut him off. "I get it, believe me." She turned toward the kitchen and then looked back at the four men on the couch. "I'm fixing stir fry for dinner. You gentlemen are welcome to stay if you'd like." The three guests agreed happily and for the first time, Puck thought that she was actually pretty cool.

While Rachel cooked, she listened to murmur of the deep male voices coming from the adjoining living room. They were discussing cars, and then some television show that they all thought was lame, and then they discussed music. But mostly, they just made wise cracks at each other's expense. She rolled her eyes nearly a dozen times during the course of cooking because they were all so juvenile. But they were also entertaining.

Rachel called the men to dinner when it was ready. They all took a seat around the "fucking huge table" (Puck's words, obviously) and dug in. In between grunts of "dude, pass me more rice", the men began engaging Rachel in conversation.

"So, Rachel," began Finn, grabbing a huge fork full of green pepper, "Puck tells me that you like music?"

"Oh, absolutely. I'm a singer…I love to sing."

"That's really awesome. Did Puck tell you that he and I were in Glee club together in high school?"

Rachel sputtered, nearly dropping the chicken right off her fork. She looked over at Puck and he just shrugged his shoulders. "You were in show choir?"

"We had a great time," said Finn. "We weren't very good but we did it anyway."

"I was in show choir, as well. Of course, I went to a high school for the performing arts so the show choir was massive. Those were great times," Rachel sighed happily.

"Well, since we weren't total losers, we also played football, basketball, and baseball." Puck interjected, suddenly feeling the need to defend his manhood.

"I can believe that," Rachel said.

"Why ya say that?" Puck questioned, leaning forward.

What Rachel had been thinking was, "Because your physique screams "athlete" and I imagine you still are." What she actually said was, "You kind of look like a meathead."

Robb, Finn, and Jimmy all looked at Rachel, mouths agape. Then they turned their heads to Puck in unison and burst out laughing. Puck leaned back in his chair, his trademark smirk intact. Rachel giggled into her plate. She was actually having fun.

The food was obliterated in record time and soon the guys were all bidding her goodbye. Puck walked outside with them while Rachel stayed in and finished up the dishes.

"Dude, she is really great," Jimmy stated as he walked toward his car parked along the street.

"Seriously, you could do much worse," Robb added. "She's actually pretty hot."

"I know, guys…I am very aware of what she looks like."

"I'm just saying, you need to get to know that girl. She is F-I-N-E," Jimmy felt the need to spell it out for reiteration.

"And she's just a nice woman," Finn added, ever the sensitive one.

"Guys…. I got it! She and I have go to get to know one another yet but I'm glad that you all like her. She was pretty cool today, that's for sure. Now get the fuck off my property," he said with a smile.

They all waved their goodbyes and as the last taillights were disappearing into the dark, Puck made his way back into the house. Rachel was humming softly to herself as she loaded the dishwasher. Feeling his presence behind her, she turned and said, "I like your friends."

Shoving his hands in his pockets, he leaned against the kitchen island. "They liked you, too."

Rachel grinned, that thought hitting home.

"And I LOVE your mother. She is amazing, Noah. She's simply amazing."

"Well, I have no idea how the hell that happened. I was sure that woman would make you cry before the day was out. But hell, I'm glad she found someone who can stand her old ass."

Rachel casually punched Puck on the arm. "That's not a nice thing to say about your mother."

He gently punched her back, his knuckles barely brushing her arm, and said, "Just wait. I'll share more stories about her. You'll eventually start watching your back."

They both stood silently for a few moments, neither really sure what to say or even what to do next. Finally, Puck looked at her and said, "You were really cool tonight with inviting the guys for dinner and cooking for us. Thank you."

"Don't get comfortable with the idea of me cooking. I'm not some little Suzy Homemaker who will be a servant to her husband," Rachel barked.

Puck looked her dead in the eye. "You sure know how to ruin a tender moment, don't you?"

Rachel reddened, realizing that her tone had been anything but appreciative. "I'm…. How about I say, "you're welcome" instead?"

"That would be better. I don't expect you to be my "little woman" but if you're willing to cook, I am willing to eat. And guess what? I may just cook too."

"Well I look forward to trying one of your creations," she said as she put the last of the dishes in the dishwasher, closed it, and turned it on.

"Prepare to be blown away, baby. I am as good on the stove as I am in the bedroom."

Why does he have to reference sex every single time we're alone? It made Rachel both uncomfortable and strangely intrigued. Despite the fact that she was now a pregnant, married woman, she still was exceptionally inexperienced, considering her one sexual encounter had led to her present life.

Deciding she didn't want to fight with him, she let his comment go. She was tired and was still coming off the high of such a good day.

"Hey, it's kinda early yet. You wanna go watch some TV or something?"

Rachel nodded. "That would be lovely."

She followed him into the living room, noticing the way his jeans molded to his strong thighs. He really was a beautiful specimen….

She sat down on the couch and Puck disappeared for a moment, returning with a big throw blanket. He tossed it to her, sat down beside her, grabbed the approximately 12 remotes that went with all of his entertainment-related contraptions, and slid closer to her.

"Mind if I have some blanket?" He asked nervously (which completely pissed him off since he was never nervous about anything.)

Rachel raised the blanket, indicating for him to scoot closer. Once he was, she threw it over him and they settled in. And that's how they spent the next two hours: sitting close together on the couch, warmed by an old throw, laughing at old sitcom reruns.

Once it was finally late enough for bed, Rachel stood and stretched. Puck turned off the television, then the lights, and they both headed towards the hallway. For some inexplicable reason, Puck found himself walking beside Rachel on the way to her room. She stopped at the door and turned to meet his eyes. "I had a good day today, Noah."

"Me too, Rachel. Again, thanks for the whole "guys for dinner" thing."

"You're welcome. They can come over anytime." Rachel stood awkwardly. Well, goodnight, Noah."

She started to step into her room but Puck said, "Rachel, wait."

"Yes?"

He stepped close to her and before she knew it, he gently bent down, his tall frame leaning into her much smaller one, and kissed her. It wasn't a seductive kiss or even a hot kiss. It was gentle, sweet, full of gratitude - and over far-too soon for Rachel's liking.

"Night," he whispered as he pulled away. She watched him walk down the hall toward the stairs, her lips still burning from the feel of his. A multitude of emotions swept through her body as he disappeared from her view and she stepped into her room. Turning off the lights, she slipped out of her clothing and into her nightgown. As she burrowed under the covers, she couldn't help but think that it had been one splendid day.