Christmas

"For the love of Merlin James, stop fidgeting."

5-year-old James Potter squirmed under his father's gaze, who was trying to tame his son's hair with a comb.

"I don't know why you even try that. It's not like it's any use, on him or you." Ginny Potter answered as she entered the living room with 2-year old Lily Potter on her arm.

"You know very well why." Harry answered and indeed Ginny knew.

It was for the same reason that James was dressed in black trousers and a smart shirt under a vest that he had been reminded several times to keep clean. It was for the same reason that she had forced herself into a dress and put make-up on after dressing up the children. It was Christmas and Harry had, foolishly in her opinion, accepted another yearly invitation to his cousin.

"Mummy, it's itchy." Albus Potter interrupted her thoughts as he tucked at his mother's arm and at his own jumper's sleeve simultaneously.

The jumper he was wearing had been a Christmas gift from Hermione. It was handmade, but while Hermione was a fair knitter, she had by no means the same skills as Ginny's mother and so the jumper may very well be a bit itchy. Today though Albus was out of luck with his complaints and Ginny dismissed them shortly.

"You'll be fine. It's only for a few hours. Now, all of you what will we remember when we visit Uncle Dudley and Aunt Alice?"

"No magic." Al quipped up at her.

"No magic." Lily echoed as she twirled herself making her dress fly high and making her squeal in delight.

Ginny fixed her oldest with an expectant look.

"James?"

"Not to mention magic. I know mum, I go to muggle school." The oldest Potter child replied rolling his eyes.

She gave him a look that was very clearly a warning to watch himself and turned to her husband.

"This will blow up in our face one day. You know it will. We have four underage wizards and witches with us. We're like a walking accidental magic mishap waiting to happen."

"You know how the Ministry is about the Statue of Secrecy. They want as little people as possible to know about magic. If something happens, we'll tell Alice, but until then we can all practice to be muggle for one day."

The last part of the sentence was directed at the three children instead of his wife, but Harry knew very well that both 4-year old Albus or 2-year old Lily could slip up at any time and they couldn't even blame them. They were simply too young to keep a double-life and that was before you took accidental magic into account.

And yet somehow Harry was unwilling to go through the act of exposing magic to his cousin's wife. He wasn't entirely sure how Dudley would feel about it and really Harry himself felt that by creating this double-life for their yearly visits, he could keep that part of his life at a certain distance. He could put it in a box and store it well away from his normal life. It suited him just fine.

But today, it was time to take the box out and visit Dudley, his wife Alice and their two-year old daughter Emma for the sake of family, Christmas and the past.

"Teddy, we need to leave." Ginny shouted up the stairs and jolted Harry from his thoughts.

There were quick footsteps from the stairs and then 11-year-old Teddy Lupin emerged in an outfit that essentially matched James'. He looked equally displeased with it too.

"Do I have to come? Can't I go to the Burrow or Shell Cottage?" Teddy asked with the hint of a whine in his voice.

Teddy had never been to his godfather's family, having spent most of Christmas with his grandmother instead. But Andromeda had passed away at the beginning of the year and so this Christmas for the first time he was stuck with tagging along to the dreaded family tradition. His own dread mainly stemmed from Jamie's regular whining coming up to today's visit and the not so flattering remarks he had picked up about his godfather's family over the years.

"Yes, why can't we go to the Burrow instead?" James chimed in.

"Grandma and grandpa deserve a day of rest too. They had the whole family over yesterday. And despite everyone else is visiting family today. Uncle Bill and Aunt Fleur are in France, Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron are at the Grangers. So we go and visit family too. All of us."

Ginny had used her no-nonsense voice despite her own reservations and the protests fell silent immediately.

"Right, we're going to apparate to a save location and then go the rest by a car that waits for us there." Harry instructed and grabbed the hands of Al and Teddy, while his wife held on to the other two children.

It took them only thirty minutes from the car's location to the Dursley's home. Thirty minutes in a minivan that they had to upgrade to for the first time as they now had six people to transport by muggle means. As they pulled into the Dursley's street, Harry looked into the rear mirror to check on the children. They had been surprisingly well-behaved, so much so that Harry suspected there had been some bribes or threatening from Ginny. Out of the corner of his eyes, he did spot something out of place though.

"Teddy, please change your hair back and remember to keep it one colour." He admonished the eleven-year old.

"My hair is always this colour. I don't have to change it for anyone else, why for these people." Teddy grumbled.

"You didn't have blue hair in primary school and you won't have blue hair today." Harry stated flatly his focus already back on parking the car.

Once parked, Harry ushered all four children out of the car, relieved that Teddy's hair was once again the mousy-brown shade he had inherited from his father. The six of them stood in front of the semi-detached home of Dudley Dursley and Harry took a last deep breath before pressing the door bell.

"Harry, Ginny it's good to see you. Come in, come in." Alice Dursley ushered them in with a warm smile. "Jamie, Albus and Lily, you've all grown so much."

Teddy who was last in line awkwardly walked past the smiling women.

"And you must be Teddy. It's so nice to finally meet you." She struck out her hand for him and under the hard glare of his godfather Teddy took it.

"Nice to meet you too Mrs. Dursley."

"Oh sweetheart, call me Aunt Alice. There's no reason to be so formal. Come in, come in. Dinner will be ready in just a short while."

The next few hours passed in snail pace for Teddy, and he was certain that the rest of the family felt the same. Well, all of them apart from Lily who had happily played with Emma Dursley and the small doll she had received as a present. James and Al had shortly played with their gifts also, but it was obvious to Teddy that the muggle toys held limited interest for the boys. He himself had been given a muggle book, and while he had no interest in a gift from the Dursley's anyway, he thought it was strange to give him a book called 'Horrible Histories'. He had dutifully thanked their hosts anyhow and eaten everything that had been stuffed on his plate.

Harry and Ginny had painfully made small talk throughout the meal and when the adults had finally finished their coffees, Teddy was more than relieved that his godfather announced that they really should go.

He sprang to his feet maybe a little too quickly and helped gather their belongings. He was already by the door with his coat on when the others followed exchanging flowery phrases of goodbyes. Teddy readily helped Jamie and Al into their dufflecoats and then stood impatiently waiting for his godparents to get a move on.

"Ted, have you said thank you for your nice gift." Harry said from behind him and Teddy could feel a hand pushing him a bit forward.

"It's nothing Harry, don't worry about it." Alice was quick to intersect, but the hand on Teddy's back did not disappear.

"Thank you, Mrs. Dursley for the nice book and thank you for your hospitality." He said with a plastered on smile and held out his hand, which she took immediately.

"You're very welcome, my dear."

They left a moment later with the usual set phrase of how they must really do this more often and how they would be in touch soon. In reality both parties knew that the next contact would be a birthday card and the next visit would be exactly 365 days from now.

The ride home was considerably more relaxed than the way to the Dursleys. As soon as they reached home the formal clothes were discarded and the entire family lounged about the living room.

"Here, give this a try." Harry tossed his godson the book he had been given by the Dursleys, when Teddy didn't join the other children in playing with their Christmas toys, but rather sat bored on the couch.

"Do I have to?" Teddy said looking at the book sceptically.

"Give it a try Teddy. It may surprise you and if not, take it as punishment for being so flippant today. I'm not accustomed to having to remind you of your manners so much." The reprimand in Harry's voice was soft, yet it was there.

Teddy scowled, but did as he was bidden. After a few minutes he was fully engrossed in the book. Harry smiled and then picked up some reading of his own, enjoying the moment of peace and quiet after the rather hectic Christmas days that had passed.

An hour later, the children were still playing and Teddy was still reading. Ginny had snuggled up next to Harry and studied some new Quidditch reports, while Harry himself was now just watching the peaceful family scene in front of him.

"I'm going to go out again." He said into the living room. "Are you coming Ted?"

It had been their ritual for several years now. Every Christmas Harry would visit his parents' grave and some years ago he had taken Teddy along and they had visited his parents also. This year though there was one more grave to visit and Harry was not sure if Teddy would cope well with that change.

But the young boy nodded steadfastly. "I'm coming. I'll just go an put my coat on."

Teddy disappeared upstairs and from the rug in front of him Jamie quipped up.

"I wanna come too, daddy."

Harry walked over to him and crouched down to meet his son's eyes.

"This isn't exactly a fun trip, Jamie. You'll be better off staying here with mum and Al & Lily. Teddy and I will be back in no time."

"You're going to see grandpa and nana Potter aren't you? I want to go too. Ms Brown said that when people die they go to heaven, but you can go to the cemetery and talk to them and they won't answer, but maybe they hear you in heaven. I want to go to the cemetery."

James voice was unusually serious for the 5-year old and Harry briefly wondered how they had come to discuss death and cemeteries in Infant School. He looked searchingly to Ginny for help, but his wife only shrugged and mouthed 'If you're ready for it.'. He took a deep breath and quickly made up his mind.

"Okay buddy, you can come, but you have to promise me that if you get scared or upset you tell me straight away. And you have to make sure you give Teddy some space. He wants to have some time to think about his parents too."

"I promise, daddy." James replied solemnly.

Ten minutes later Harry left the house with a child on each side. It was only a short walk through the wintery evening to reach the little cemetery of Godrick's Hollow. They went nearly all the way in silence, James' small hand in Harry's big one, while Teddy walked half a step in front of them.

The cemetery was lying deserted next to the dark chapel. It was a clear, starry night, but there was no snow like there had been the first time Harry had been here. They hadn't had a white Christmas for years. The old iron gate creaked as Teddy pushed it open for them. The young boy knew the way to the Potter grave, but he let Harry pass and lead the way.

As they reached the marble headstone that marked Lily and James Potter's grave, Harry crouched down and pulled James close to his chest.

"This is where we remember grandma and grandpa Potter. You can say something to them or just think of them. And then before we leave, we put down some flowers." He whispered into his son's ear.

They stood there in silence, all three of them engaged with their own thoughts. Faintly one could hear Jamie whisper to the graves, though no audible words made it to Harry's or Teddy's ears.

"Good evening." A female voice came from behind them.

"Aunt Hermione." Jamie squealed in delight, before clasping his mouth shut, unsure whether he had been too loud in this sacred space.

"Good evening Hermione." Harry said with a small smile and stood to give her a warm hug.

This was another of their traditions. Every year Hermione would be there for him, just like she had been there 12 years ago. The first Christmas after the war it had been an accident. She hadn't known he would be there, he had decided to go on a whim. In the end they had arrived nearly simultaneously and ever since the two of them had come back on Christmas Eve. Only when the children had arrived did they move this yearly date to the evening of Boxing Day instead.

Hermione sneaked her hand into his.

"Merry Christmas, Harry."

"Merry Christmas." He echoed and his voice was heavy with emotion. If it wouldn't be so dark, the others would be able to see his eyes shining with tears that threatened to fall. He felt Hermione squeeze reassuringly. Apparently she knew without seeing.

They raised their wands together and muttered a spell that created a beautiful wreath of Christmas roses on the grave. When the flowers had set, Hermione reminiscently touched the marble stone before she looked at Harry.

"You brought James?" She mouthed.

"He asked to come." He whispered back with a shrug.

"I can take him home if you like. I know you want to take Teddy."

Harry nodded in response. "Thank you."

She smiled warmly at him and then crouched down next to her nephew.

"Jamie, your dad and Teddy need to go see Teddy's parents too. What do you say we stay here and I take you home?"

"Okay." The young boy responded looking up at her innocently.

Harry pressed a kiss on his son's head and then took Teddy's hand leading him out of the cemetery.

"Ready to apparate?" He asked clutching the smaller hand more tightly.

Teddy felt the nasty sensation of side-along apparation a moment later and then just as quick as it had come it was gone again and Teddy saw the familiar cemetery near his Cornwall home. Well, it wasn't really his home anymore, but it had been for most of his life.

It took his godfather's gentle probing to get Teddy's feet to start moving. His stomach twisted with an unpleasant feeling. He wanted to see their graves, and yet he also dreaded these visits.

At first they reached the older grave of his parents. The headstone was shaped by the weather and its familiarity calmed Teddy somewhat. He knew this, he'd come here all his life.

Harry conjured a white and a red calla and handed them to Teddy. The young boy kneeled in front of the graves gently placing the flowers on the ground. With a deep breath he started talking to the empty space, save in the knowledge that Harry would have stepped away a few feet to give him privacy.

"Hi mum, dad. Merry Christmas. It's my first Christmas with the Potters and it's been really good. Although I did have to go visit Harry's horrid family. They weren't too bad though, just a bit boring. They gave me a funny book. I think you would like it dad, it's full of gruesome but fun history facts. Well, it's also the first Christmas holiday from Hogwarts. Hogwarts is amazing, I'm in Gryffindor like dad, but the hat did say I could be Hufflepuff too, just not Ravenclaw, apparently I'm too lazy for that. That's alright though, they're in the library all the time, which really is not that much fun. Not when you have a whole magical castle too explore. Lots of people compare me to you too. I admit it is a bit weird, but I like when they tell me about you. It's really hard now that nana isn't here anymore. She always told me so many stories about you, mum. I really, really miss her. I miss you too."

He stocked in his speech and blinked back a few cold tears. He lingered by their grave a moment longer, unwilling to let go of this moment with them, but also wary of his next obligation.

When he stood and returned to the crooked path, Harry was by his side in a heartbeat. Teddy's pace slowed as they drew closer to his grandmother's grave and Harry allowed his stalling as he fell into step with his godson. When they arrived at Andromeda's grave, it stood prominently among the many other, older graves. The headstone was bright marble, not clouded by the weather like most of the surrounding stones. There were still wreaths on her grave, which made it so different to anything Teddy had ever seen on his parent's grave. It brought back the memories of the cold, dreary February day that had been his grandmother's funeral.

Teddy began to shake from his thoughts and the cold wind that howled over the cemetery. He inched closer to his godfather, who had put a comforting and protective arm around his waist after conjuring Christmas Roses like he had done for his parent's grave.

As Teddy read Andromeda's name on the stone, tears finally escaped him. He couldn't talk to her like he talked to his parents, he couldn't kneel at her grave and remember her fondly. All he felt standing here was grief. Tears running down his cheeks, he rested his head on Harry's side. The silence between them was only disrupted by Teddy's irregular sobs and the hostile howling of the wind.

"I miss her." Teddy confessed with hitched breath.

"I know Teddy. I miss her too. She's watching over you now." Harry answered in a comforting manner.

"It's not the same." The young boy replied between two sobs.

"No, it isn't." Harry acknowledged . "It's okay to miss her, but she wouldn't want you to be sad. Remember the happy times together Ted. She would want to see you smile."

A sad smile appeared on Teddy's face and he slipped out of his godfather's embrace. He reached into his pocket and crouched down to the grave. Wiping his tears away, he placed a crumbled envelope against the headstone.

"I love you nana."

He stood and for the first time since they had apparated Teddy's eyes met Harry's.

"Let's go home please." He said steadfastly.

Harry nodded, took his hand and together they walked down the frosty footpath. The faint sound of apparation echoed over the now deserted cemetery and took the two orphans back home. A home that was filled with warmth, joy and love, but most importantly a home that was family.

AN: Just a little story about Teddy's first Christmas at the Potter's. Hope you enjoy. I'm always looking for feedback, so please feel free to review. I'm also still looking for a beta-Reader, if anyone thinks they can help.