p align="justify"I don't return to Beecher's Hope nowadays. It's not easy for me to be there, not in that empty house./p
p align="justify"Sometimes, when I'm there, I think I hear Rufus barking. My Ma humming to herself. Pa tapping his foot against the wood floor as he rests in a chair. Uncle laughing./p
p align="justify"I can't be there anymore. They aren't there, and the moments that I think for a moment that they might be... those kill me./p
p align="justify"I sleep where I can. Rented beds, or the ground. I don't get the chance to shave, or even bathe, very often. I hunt bounties, and spend the money on food, ammo, and a lot to drink./p
p align="justify"I heard a man preaching outside of the saloon, talking about how drinking will send you to hell. I wanted to tell him that it wasn't the drink that damned my soul. I was damned from the moment I was born./p
p align="justify"Son of a murderer and a whore. We put on our show, we played house and pretended, but that's all we were. That's all we ever were./p
p align="justify"I once dreamed of being a writer, you know. I once dreamed of being someone, and now I'm no one. Now, I'm not a god damned thing./p