cRaZY AdVenTuRE

vAkAMa foR PrEsIDenT

MoN: FF doesn't owe bionicle. But she owns me, Jade and Edaj. For more information, see bottom of the chapter.

Kopaka: What's that?

MoN: Disclaimer, sort of.

Onua: Vakama for president?

MoN: Yep.

Gali: We have to stop this crazy writer. Come on everyone! Let's get back toghether and find a way to get our liberty back!

Lewa: Shut up!

MoN: Sorry, you can't escape FF!

(A/N: Mwahahahahaha!)

A new day had started on Mata Nui. Everyone was getting ready for the trip to Mata Nui.

Everybody: Huh?

Sorry-Metru Nui. The island of legends. It's name came from the fact that it was made out of legends. The Vahki were a legend. The Toa were a legend. Metru Nui was a legend. In fact, the true name of Metru Nui is N... STOP! Before I say too much. All you have to know is that Metru Nui isn't the real name of Metru Nui. What really cares now, is that there was a small problem. Really small. Tiny. So tiny that it isn't even worth talking about. So I won't.

Tahu: That's unfair. First you tell us that there's a problem. Then you don't tell us what it is!

Alright. The problem was, that the boats for the trip to Metru Nui had been eaten by termites overnight. And since Tahu had burned the whole island, there weren't any more trees.

Pohatu: Tiny problem?

MoN: Yes, the solution is easy: Don't go to Metru Nui!

Nuju: Click! Thweet! Click-click! Pfffff!

Edaj: Pfff?

Nuju: -wets lips- Thweeeeeeeeeeeeeet!

MoN: Whatever.

The Matoran and the Toa had realized that only now. And It had been a shock for the whole island. Especially for Le-Matoran, who were crying their eyes out. Soon, the island was full of eyeballs. Lewa, also known as "The Human Vine", had started singing a sad piece. It sounded as if a cat was scratching his claws on a blackboard, actually, that was the sound of the chalk that FF's french teacher was using to write on the board. FF's french teacher turned around to ask Edaj to spell 'étagère', but she pronounced the name Edaj wrong and was killed by a devil that Edaj had summoned.

In the meanwhile. A more serious problem had occured. The tears of the Le-Matoran were flooding the whole island. FF's math teacher, who was passing by, tried to calculate in how much time the island would be submerged. But she accidentally stepped on an ant farm, reason why she was attacked by a killer slug.

Gali: Killer slug?

Onua: Why should a killer slug attack FF's math teacher if she destroyed an ant farm?

MoN: Ask L&O. They're coming in the next chapter.

The tears were approaching Po-Koro. Soon, they would have turned the whole desert into a swamp. It was then that Pohatu saw them.

"IIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiih!" he screamed "WATER! I'm afraid of water! Help!"

A lifeguard of 'Baywatch' saw that Pohatu was in danger of drowning, but since Pohatu wasn't a sexy tanned girl he turned around and walked away. Pohatu freaked out and started running in circles.

"Water! Help! Mommy! No wait, my mom was a Ga-Matoran. Daddy!"

Pohatu's dad came out of a hut.

"Poor child!. You must have been so scared!" said Onewa. Pohatu accidentally put a foot in water, squealed, ran into his father's hut and started whining.

The tears were about to submerge Po-Koro. But since that would mean that the end of the story,

Bionicle: Yahoooooooo!

Jade used her powers to make the Le-Matoran fall in love with the ashes. So the island was now full of matoran kissing the ground.

"Hey!" said Lewa, who decided to protest inside the story in a desperate attemp to ruin it. "Leave my people alone! Make Ta-Matoran kiss the ashes, make Ga-Matoran cry, make Po-Matoran freak out when they see water. BUT LEAVE MY PEOPLE ALONE!"

"Why?" aked MoN, calmly cutting her fingernails.

"Because my people are the youngest!"

"Really?"

"Yes, I'm the youngest of the Toa, so Le-Matoran are the youngest too!"

"Ah-ha."

"Besides," interrupted Pohatu. "I don't run around screaming just because of a bit of water!!! And Onewa isn't my father."

"We're talking about Le-Matoran! Not about you!"

"I have something to say about that too! How come Lewa always gets what he wants?"

"Because I'm the youngest! And the youngest always get what they want!"

"Says who?"

"Says me!" said Vakama, who was walking around there for no reason. "From now on, I'm the president! I have control even on the other Turaga!"

"Don't even think about it!" said Nokama, who apparently was everywhere where Vakama was."I'll be the president!"

So the Turaga all started fighting about who of them was supposed to be the president. In the end, they decided for the Matoran to vote. But the Matoran are all dumbheads without brains that do only what the Turaga tell them. That's also the proof that Takua wasn't really a Matoran since he always did the opposite of what the Turaga said. Or maybe it was just a bug in the programmation. So what happened was that all the Matoran wrote random votes like: Vaknua, Onkama, Nokewa. Or even worse: Orlando Bloom, Little Red Riding Hood, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Saddam Hussein. A lot of them voted George Bush for no reason at all, other just wrote down: What does voting mean?

So soon the Turaga realized that there were only thirteen people on the island that could vote. Tahu, Gali, Kopaka, Onua, Pohatu, Lewa, MoN, Jade, Edaj, the Baywatch lifeguard, a rakshi and Makuta.

Takanuva: How come I can't vote?

MoN: Because you were a matoran before, and you're blind. You wouldn't know what you're writing.

Onewa: Those are twelve people.

MoN: No, they're thirteen, because if they were twelve then it could happen that each of you got two votes. At least like this it's sure that one of you gets three.

Nokama: But the people that are voting are still twelve.

MoN: Let's wait until the end to talk about his.

It's obvious that nearly all of the Toa voted for their own Turaga. But since Onua loved Gali (and Gali loved Onua), to do her a favour he voted Nokama, and Gali voted Whenua. Then she went out of the cavern where they were voting with Kopaka. Jade voted Nokama too because she liked her calm ways. Edaj instead voted Vakama to annoy Jade. The Baywatch lifeguard realized that there weren't tanned girls to save on this island and since his only hope to keep the job was to save someone who couldn't swim, he voted Nuju. The rakshi and Makuta didn't want to vote, but Onewa took control of the rakshi's mind with his Noble Mask of Mind Control and forced him to write Onewa. When he tried it on Makuta, Makuta got really angry and voted Matau.

Whenua was the only one with only one vote now, so he went to his home to talk to FF's history teacher that had been hiding there since the party and asked him about Cesar's techniques to get votes. FF's history teacher had just started to explain, but Pewku jumped on the hut and the ceiling squashed him.

MoN voted Whenua because I wanted it.

In the end, the votes were:

Nokama: 2

Whenua: 2

Nuju: 2

Matau: 2

Onewa: 2

Vakama: 3

Nokama: That's mathematically impossible!

MoN: Who cares.

Onewa: It cares to me! I could've won!

MoN: The people were thirteen, I told you. If Vakama won it's bacause the chapter is called VAkaMa fOR prEsIdEnT.

Matau: I would still like to know how it's possible that with twelve people there are thirteen votes

Ojil: Easy.

Lijo: Sorry, I know that we weren't supposed to pop up until tomorrow.

Ojil: But I wanted to come here, so he had to come too!

MoN: Alright, but you explain only this okay?

Ojil: Okey dokey! So, it's true that there are twelve people voting. But in the end, it's really FF who decides. And since the chapter was already Vakama for President, FF made sure that there were only twelve people voting. Then she voted too!

Lijo: That's the silliest explanation of the whole world.

Ojil: No it's not. If there had been 13 people, and Whenua had gotten 3 votes, then it would have really not made any sense, because he would have won, but Vakama would have been the president.

MoN: Thanks Ojil. All the other explanation in the next chapter, when these two are coming into scene. But I don't think that this President Vakama stuff is important. Probably just something because FF couldn't think of anything else.


Disclaimer: Lijo & Ojil are mine. The Baywatch lifeguard belongs to baywatch and they can keep him. All those people that the Matoran voted belong to themselves. The ant farm comes from my backyard and so does the killer slug. The teachers belong to the school. Everything else belongs to Bionicle

Antler: Thanks for reviewing, as you see, Kopaka and Gali did go out toghether. (Out of the cavern, hehe) No, seriously now. I've already started this story as an Onua/Gali, but there's nothing planned. I'll think about it.

Slythergirl: I'm happy that you like it. And don't worry about letting myself dowm. It's just that I like to complain. You'll have to be patient for the next chapter, because I run out of ideas fast, but don't worry, I've already thought of something, just it might take a while until it comes up. In the meanwhile, you can check out 'Heroes of the Past' and tell me what you think about it.

Note: If someone want's to ask me something, ask it clearly 'cause I'll always look for double meanings, and a 'go out together' will become a 'go out of a cave together'. And a Tahu/Gali will become a fight between Tahu and Gali.