I know I'm really late on this update but blame my laptop. It won't turn on. So I wrote this chapter on my iPhone and it was a pain in the ass! Anyway, here's chapter 3. Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: Victorious, I do not own.
"I'll tell you what I want what I really really want! So tell me what you want what you really really want!"
Trina has been singing and dancing in the living room for hours now. I don't know where she gets all this energy from. Her out of tune singing and loud thumping would usually bother me but this is all too amusing. I'm sitting at the dinner table with a bag of frozen peas pressed against the back of my head while I watch Trina soak herself up in her confidence. I've been sporting a bump since Wednesday night and it might as well be the size of a golf ball. My headaches have been coming and going but they don't last for too long. Thank God they last for a short period of time, because they're excruciating and feel as though they'll last forever.
Those headaches... this bump... They hold a memory I wish I could forget. I'm over the fact that Jade carried me home and that I'll probably never get an answer as to why she did so. We almost killed each other, I'm over that too. I'm not over the fact that she saw me shed a tear. Or tears... whatever. Like I said before, Jade and I are destined to be enemies or friends that aren't really friends. And because of that, I refuse to admit, especially to Jade, that I can be weak. If tearing down her walls is impossible, then tearing down my walls should be impossible too. It's one thing for her to see that she can get me angry but it's another thing for her to see me cry. Jade West cannot take control. I won't allow it. Now that I think about it, it seems that Jade and I may have too much pride to lose this war. It's ongoing and seeing her tonight, uninvited, definitely won't give this war a break.
"Tori, where are you going?" Trina asks, out of breath as she takes her PearPod off the dock and lays on the couch.
"A party."
"Oooo! Can I come? Who's party is it? A senior's party? A hot senior? Oh wait!" She quickly sits up and stares at me in excitement. "I bet it's Caroline Carter's party. Her parties are always awesome!"
"Whoa. Slow down, Speedy Gonzales. How would you know what her parties are like? You've never been to one... let alone been invited. Trina, she doesn't even like you. You spit in her lunch because she got a role that you wanted, remember?"
"So? That was before I knew her house was massive! and she has a brother who's in college! He's hot!" She pauses for a moment and stares at me desperately.
"What?" I say harshly.
"Can I come or not?" She whines.
"No! It's not even Caroline's party. It's Jade's."
She stares at me with a raised eyebrow, confusion is written all over her face. I already know what's running through that mind of hers. I'm going to Jade's party. Jade and I hate each other. Blah blah blah.
"Jade is throwing a party and you, Tori Vega, are going?" Hook. "Don't you guys hate each other?" Line. "I really don't understand you two." And of course, sinker. I nailed it, I saw all of that coming.
I stare at her with my chin slightly raised and hesitate on purpose. "Yes. I, Tori Vega, am going to Jade West's party."
"You guys were ready to rip each other's heads off the last time I saw you two together... and you're still going to her party after that?"
I lift my chin slightly and hesitate once again. "Yeah. Yeah, pretty much." I respond nodding my head in confidence.
Trina gets up off the couch and starts for the dinner table. She sits next to me and that confused look on her face is now gone. She seems concerned now. I throw my bag of peas onto the table and study her. Uh oh. This can't be good. This can't be good at all. The last time she attacked me with concern at the dinner table was about a year ago when she thought I was sexually active. Was i sexually active? No, and I'm still not. Why she thought I was sexually active? I don't know, but it sure beats having "the talk" with my parents. They've made attempts but I've rejected each one. Just thinking about having the talk with my parents gives me the shivers but that's beside the point. I just wonder what Trina is so concerned about this time around.
"What? Why are you staring at me like that, Trina?" She places a hand on my shoulder and smiles at me.
"I know that I'm prettier and more talented than you but you should know that I still love you."
"Umm... Okay?" It's amazing how conceited this girl is sometimes or most of the time rather.
"That just goes to show that I will love you no matter what." She stares at me and smiles but then the smile instantly shrinks. "Don't take this the wrong way but do you and Jade have a thing going on? A dysfunctional relationship? More than friends? A secret rela-"
"Whoa whoa whoa! What?" I blurt out, shrugging her hand off my shoulder. "What?" I repeat.
"Do you and Jade have a thi-"
"No don't repeat it. I heard you but... w- what?" I can't believe this! Am I hearing all of this correctly? Does my sister really think I'm into girls? Does she really think I'm into... Jade? I get up from my seat and stare down at her. "Are you crazy? I like guys. Dudes. Males. Men. Not girls and most definitely not Jade!"
"Whoa! Calm down. I'm just- I'm just saying. You two supposedly hate each other, right? But one minute you guys are cool and the next minute you guys want to kill each other. You could only supposedly hate someone for so long before you explode. You two are so bi polar, it's weird. Or should I say... bi sexual" She laughs.
"Trina!" I storm out of the dining room area and head straight for the stairs.
"Tori! I still love you!"
"I don't care! I still think you're crazy!"
I get to my room and slam my body onto my bed face first. I had to get out of there. That conversation alone was too much for me to handle that I'm exhausted from it. My sister is delusional. She's crazy. Absolutely insane.
xXx
Andre finally calls to tell me that he's in my driveway. He's half an hour late but I don't mind because I'm not in a rush to get to the party. I'm just happy that I'm seeing familiar faces again. I've been a student at Hollywood Arts for quite some time now and I couldn't be more thankful for the group of people that I hang out with. Andre, Cat, Robbie, Beck and... Jade... I guess.
"Trina! I'm leaving! Try not to burn the place down!" I yell as I'm about to head out the door. Trina stomps down the stairs with a hairbrush that seems to be stuck in her hair.
"God! Those infomercials are- they're just- they're just so- urgh! This vibrating hairbrush comes in late and it wasn't even worth the wait! Now it's stuck in my hair and it won't turn off!" The vibrating hairbrush is doing just that, vibrating in a clump of hair. It's hilarious. "Tori, help me? Please!"
"Sorry, sis. You're stuck in this mess. I have to go."
"Urgh. Fine. Have fun and don't let your Jade get to you." My Jade? My Jade. My sister is still delusional. I decide to ignore her and slam the door behind me.
The car ride on the way to Jade's place is filled with melodies and perfect harmonies. Andre picked Cat up before he came and got me. Cat suggested that we'd sing songs but before Andre and I could protest, she belted out a note that got me and Andre going.
We've been singing random tunes for about fifteen minutes and the car starts to slow down.
"Wow!"
"Aaw, Tor! You ruined it! We sounded so pretty!" Cat says disappointed, turning around to look at me in the back seat.
"Sorry but that house is huge!" I say with my nose pressed up against the window.
"Yep. It's quite the sight, ain't it? That right there is the West residence." Andre says, pulling into the driveway.
"Whoa..." I've never been to Jade's house before because I never had a reason to go. I always imagined it to be average. Not too big and not too small. But boy was I wrong. The West residence has a huge driveway leading to three garage doors. To the left is her porch with a huge front door with patterned windows. There are huge windows all around the house. Huge huge huge! It's overwhelming! "This place is-"
"A beautiful pile of bricks? I know." Andre interrupts.
"I didn't know she was so-"
"Rich? Her mommy and daddy have money coming out of their bums! Mostly her daddy though." Cat interrupts this time.
"Okay. You ladies ready?" Andre turns off the engine and we get out of the car.
Cat skips her way to the front door while Andre and I continue walking behind her. I'm still scanning the front of the house with my eyes in awe. Cat rings the doorbell causing me to snap back to my senses and the ring echoes throughout the whole house. I could only imagine how beautiful it is on the inside. The door finally opens and Cat jumps in excitement. Cat hugs Jade and Jade obviously doesn't respond to the embrace. Jade is staring at me as if she's staring into my soul.
Cat makes her way inside and Jade leans on the doorframe, still staring into my soul.
Every feeling from Wednesday night has returned and I don't know why. I said I was over it but now it bothers me that Jade is throwing a party. How could she be over what happened on that night? Why wasn't she wallowing like I was for the past couple of days? Why am I hurt? Why do I want answers? Answers as to why she carried me home. Answers as to why I'm feeling this way right now. What's wrong with me?
"I don't remember inviting that one." She says pointing at me and glaring at Andre.
"I- um- I didn't do anything!" Andre swoops passed Jade into the house. She looks over her shoulder and back at me. Stay cool, Tori. Stay cool.
"So?" She crosses her arms and scans me. "What gave you the balls to come here?"
I hesitate. "I've come here uninvited. Sound familiar to you, expert?" She looks away for a moment and scans me again.
"You're not going to attack me, Vega? With questions?" She pushes herself off the doorframe and takes a few steps toward me.
As much as I want answers, I have no choice but to reject my cravings for them. I don't want to feel or seem vulnerable. "I got it to the head pretty good that night, remember? I was feeling wonky. Just pretend like it never happened."
"Oh, I have. I just don't want any of your funny business roaming around my house. Got it?"
"Unlike you, I have respect for other households. Don't worry, I won't cut up your mom's flowers with scissors." It's incredibly hard to keep my composure right now. I just want to yell and scream and pout like a child.
"Ha. Good. Come in."
We walk into her house and it's so clean. I mean it... it's spotless.
"You guys got here pretty early so, we'll hang out in the kitchen while we wait for everyone else."
"Your place is amazing."
"I know." She says, leading me to the kitchen.
About an hour has passed since Robbie and Rex finally arrived. We've been hanging out in Jade's kitchen for quite some time before the doorbell started ringing every five minutes or so. Thank goodness. It's distracting, I really need to get my mind off all my confusion. So, the more people the better. I'm surprised that a lot of people are even coming to this party. Jade West intimidates everyone at Hollywood Arts and to see all these unfamiliar faces is pretty surprising.
Jade directs everyone to the basement and the gang follows.
"Andre, we're missing someone. Where's Beck?"
"Canada. He left last night."
"Oh." I say in response. "Whoa... This is a basement?" Her house just keeps getting better and better. Once you get downstairs there's a pool table in the middle of the room. Right next to that is a wall, on the other side is a bar, a plasma screen television and many pictures on the walls.
I take a seat on the only couch in sight. I regret coming here but Andre seems to be my only ride home and being a party pooper is never good. Coming here was a mistake. Seeing Jade has triggered emotions that I can't explain. Why is everything unexplainable? WHY? Is getting straight answers too much to ask? I lean back on the couch and rub my temples. "I'm going crazy." I say to myself. The lights are all of sudden turned off and a stream of colored lights are turned on, moving and changing to the beat of music blaring from speakers. A dude set up turn tables next to the bar and it looks like this party has begun.
I'm glued to this couch while everyone is dancing around. A couple is making out right next to me and I'm afraid that they might swallow each other. I turn away from the slobs and spot Jade dancing her life away with Cat, Andre, and another guy I've never seen in my life. Jade dancing with other people, I never thought I'd see the day where she'd do it with her own will. She can dance, she can move her body, she doesn't have a rhythm issue. She knows what she's doing and it's beautiful. I continue watching her as she flows to the beats so smoothly. Her hips moving left and right. Her arms and shoulders taking in rhythms and letting those rhythms take control. She runs her fingers through her hair and continues her movements that I can't take my eyes off of.
I can't do this.
I make my way through the crowd and head back upstairs. I explore my way through the first floor and head up the stairs to the second. I assume Jade's parents aren't home so I guess I have nothing to worry about. A washroom is all I need. I'm going crazy. I must be going crazy. My headache is coming back and I can feel that excruciating feeling about to take over. I run to the first door that I see and turn the knob. I turn on the light and realize that I'm in Jade's room. It's dark even with the light on. I don't explore, I just head straight for her mirror. I could care less about my surroundings. I just need to see if I'm going crazy... If I look crazy.
My face looks fine. My hair looks fine. My clothes look the same way they looked when I left my house. I'm still Tori. I'm not crazy. I'm still sane. Kinda.
"Vega!" A familiar voice yells from behind me causing me to jump and grab my chest.
"Oh my god!" I turn around and realize that it's Jade. "Oh. Jade, it's- it's you. You almost gave me a heart attack!"
"Good! Now what the hell are you doing in here?"
"I- uh- I- um- I was just-"
"Spit it out, Vega."
"I was looking for a washroom and ended up in here." Jade makes her way to her closet and grabs a shirt. I notice that she has a big stain on the shirt that she is currently wearing. "What happened?"
"Some idiot spilled a drink on me." The goth quickly takes her shirt off and my eyes are glued to her once again. Her body... it's... it's beautiful. "What is it, Vega? Never seen a girl change before?"
"I- just- um-"
"Stop stuttering. It's annoying. Are you coming back downstairs? I don't want you contaminating my room."
"Look, Jade. About the other night..." I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm saying. I need to let something out. I just don't know exactly what it is.
Jade lets out a groan. "What did I say about questions? Don't start."
"No. No. I just wanted to say that I- um-" Let it out, Tori. You've made it this far and there's no turning back now.
"What?" She says, irritated.
"I wanted to say that I- um- I think- I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for bringing me home the other night."
"That's all you wanted to say?"
"Yeah." I say unsure. "What else would you want me to say?"
"Nothing." She looks disappointed. Did I say something wrong? "Are you coming downstairs or not? Seriously. I don't want you in here."
"Yeah. I'll be there." Before I knew it, Jade left the room. Urgh! What's wrong with me? What's wrong with me? WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?
I grab my phone out of my back pocket and dial.
"Hello? Trina? Can you pick me up?" Trina whined but I finally convinced her and gave her directions to Jade's house. I can't stay here. I might cause a scene or do something stupid.
Trina finally arrived and I was out the door before anyone could see me. I got into my seat and slammed the door. My headache is getting worse. Everything is overwhelming me right now.
"Jade's house is hu-"
"I know. Drive!"
"Okay okay. What's wrong, sistah?" I ignore her before we could make eye contact. "I was right earlier, wasn't I? You like her, don't you?"
It's too obvious to lie to my sister. So I won't. I shut my eyes tight. "I think so. I'm about ready to explode."
I want answers because I have these feelings for her. It's that simple yet so complicated.
"It's okay. Remember, I love you."
"Yeah, thanks, Trina." I look out the window and notice that we're already on the main road. "But I don't think she ever will." I say quietly, referring to Jade.
"Sorry? What'd you say?"
"Nothing."
God, Tori! How could you not realize that you liked her before? Silly girl. Kinda cliff-y this chapter is, ain't it? I like build ups. Do you like build ups? Let's hope so. Don't worry, I won't kill you with all the build ups. Maybe. Now, review! It was a pain to write this up on a phone so the least you could do is review! Blood sweat and tears went into this. Okay, lovelies. Until next time...