1SO WHERE WERE YOU?

Chapter 3

"So then what happened?" Han asked.

"I was sixteen, dead ass broke, and listening to these guys who were throwing around as much in tips that I could've stayed in a decent place for a week. They mentioned they needed help, and I decided, what the kriff? I said I was looking for a new job. They told me to meet 'em at the Imperial after I finished my shift. These were guys who'd spent over two hundred credits just on dinner and then they're going to drink at the Imperial? Whatever these guys were doing, I wanted in. At least I thought I did."

"Lemme guess. They were dealing ryll," Han said.

"I'm getting there. So I was underage but nobody asked for my ID, these guys were in their twenties and I was tall, so I guess I passed. I couldn't afford a razor so I was looking kinda scruffy."

Han burst into laughter.

Jonash narrowed his eyes. "Did I say something funny?"

"I was just thinking of something Leia said to me one time back before we got together."

"And what did she say?"

"She said, why you half-witted, stuck-up, scruffy-looking nerfherder!"

"And you said?"

"Who's scruffy-looking?" Both men laughed.

"I think your mother said something along those lines when we'd just met each other."

"Yeah, well, you do look pretty scruffy."

Jonash barked a short laugh. "Let's see how you look at my age. I gotta say, though, you clean up well."

"You haven't seen me in thirty-nine years. How would you know?"

Jonash looked up at him. "I tried to buy you back from Shrike."

Han nearly choked on his ale. "When?

"I'm getting there. So these guys, they wanted a runner. Someone nobody knew. They offered me a room, and when I saw the room, you could have knocked me over with a with a whisper bird feather. We lived on the edge of the slums, and I'd never been in a place that fancy. I remember how my eyes nearly popped out of my head. The 'fresher they said for me to use, it was almost the size of my bedroom at my parents' house. The bedroom was as large as the whole house!"

"Sweet," Han replied in a dry tone.

"Of course, there's always a catch, but I was young and stupid and I did young and stupid things. So by the end of the night, I'm drunk off my ass, and they tell me that all they want is someone to deliver packages. Packages of what, I should have asked, but then again, I was sixteen, I had a nice place to live, I got paid a lot better than I did washing dishes and busing tables. Went well for a while. Some of the people I did business with were nasty as all hells and finally, one day, I was sent out to do a delivery to someone, and it turns out to be undercover ImpSec. I told 'em that I just made the deliveries, but when they went to arrest the guys I was working for and the place I lived, they'd cleared out. They'd taken the stash and the credits. So I got screwed. I wasn't an adult, not by law, so only seven years, but man, seven years is like forever when you're in prison."

"Didn't you get a lawyer?" Han asked, incredulous.

Jonash eyed him sharply. "Due process wasn't exactly in fashion during that time. So I got out, after I finished my time, mad as hells at the Imps. I managed to get another restaurant job, but nowhere as nice as the one I had when I got into ryll deliveries. I made friends with a guy a few years older than me, a server. He says, let's get a drink after our shift. Now, there's no shortage of bars in the area, but he takes me to one that's almost underground. He meets up with about twenty other sentients, it's so dark that I almost can't figure out who's what, but then, there's this beautiful girl. Dark hair. She's looking me up and down. I'm squirming 'cause I don't think she likes what she sees, even though I do and I don't think I'm hiding it very well. So she says to me, 'the meeting's about to start. Or are you just here for the beer?' She's got the most beautiful face. Greenest eyes I've ever seen on a human. And so I'm trying to think of something clever to say, and she says, 'if you're here for the beer, you're going to be really disappointed.' She looks at me like she's pitying me for just existing. There's no chairs near her open, but there's one at an angle across the table. So I take it and I ask, what meeting?"

"Smooth," Han remarked archly.

"And then everyone just kind of stares at me like I'm some kind of complete moron, and Genest, that's my work friend, says, 'welcome to the Corellian Independence Movement.' I'm kind of irritated at him, I thought we were just heading out to get drunk. I almost walked. But my hatred for the Imps was like a thousand white hot suns after doing seven years, and I was willing to do anything to hurt the bastards. So I stay and listen but mostly, I'm staring at this girl, and I learn her name's Jaina. You can tell right off she's high rent."

"I'm more than a little familiar with this," Han interjected, thinking back on the day in the medical bay on Hoth. He'd nearly left the day before, but he hadn't been given clearance to leave, and he thought back on what a sorry excuse his life would have been if he'd left the previous day to pay off Jabba.

"I ask her on the way out if she wants a kaf. I mean, it's not like I could afford to buy her dinner. She says no. But there's one good thing: there's another meeting three nights after that one. Different taverna every time. So I decide I can stick it to the Imps and maybe Her Highness'll notice me."

Han was amused - and more than a little weirded out. He signaled the server for another round.

"I'm late for the next meeting. Jaina's there and I'm really embarrassed now. She gives me this look like, why are you late? Of course, no chairs open near her. Genest wasn't on work, so he got me one. This makes me sad because I can't even look at Jaina from where I'm stuck sitting. So I listened. But I'm skeptical. There's barely twenty of us, and they're talking about taking out the Imps. I don't care how many beers you've had, that's crazy talk. But I figured, what if they're right?

"It's not like things were getting better - every day, it was worse and worse. I didn't care for politics, never did, but I was seeing how I didn't have a fair shot in the system, and I got interested."

"So you got involved."

"Mostly I got involved to be near Jaina."

Han said nothing, thinking how bizarre it was all getting to be.

"Jaina Rashell. From a nice family. A nice family that wanted independence for Corellia. She was an interpreter in the Corellian legislature. So she was in charge of spying in the group."

Han was trying to form a picture of his mother in his mind.

As if on cue, Jonash said, "I bet your daughter looks just like her."

"Let's leave the kids out of it for now," Han said firmly. Jonash's expression was one of sadness and disappointment, but he said nothing; clearly Han was not ready to let him into that part of his life.

"Anyway, I asked her to join me for a kaf a second time."

"She said no?"

"She said no. But there was no way I was giving up because I was head over heels in love with her. Of course, I was hardly the type of guy she went for. Hells, I wasn't anyone's type. Who wants a loser with a record and can't get a decent job?"

"Hold that thought," Han indicated. "I don't know about you, but I think if we're gonna keep talking, some food might be in order. I try to keep hangovers to a minimum."

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Leia was not a person who confided in people outside of Han and Luke. And even with Luke, there was a barrier. That obstacle was related to their parentage.

Luke spoke of Anakin Skywalker with pride that at times bordered on reverence. Luke had turned him away from the Dark Side at the end of Anakin's life and always addressed him as father. Leia decided, based on her grandmother's journals, that he hadn't been born evil and she had made her peace by naming her son Anakin, thinking the name would lose the taint that it carried. She never felt that her son had anything to do with the monster that her biological father had been for so much of his life as. Anakin was a sweet, friendly, funny and intelligent child. Her father may well have been that way as a young person. Of course, her son never suffered as a slave. Her son knew his father, lived in a prosperous family, and was permitted to be a child.

Being a child, she observed with irony, was something that Anakin Skywalker, Luke, Han and she had been deprived of. It wasn't that she hadn't enjoyed life when she was younger. Breha and Bail Organa were deeply caring parents, but they were a politically powerful family, and they had groomed their adopted daughter for public service from the very start. Luke had been raised by Obi-Wan Kenobi's half brother Owen Lars and Owen's wife Beru, and he'd started doing farm chores by the time he was five. Han had been held as a prisoner from the age of two.

She and Han were doing all they could to preserve childhood for their children. They were Force sensitive kids, but they were, first and foremost, kids. Luke would approach them about starting training for the kids, but Han and Leia vetoed it every time. They'd told him that at the age of fifteen, Luke could begin training the kids, but warned him that if they chose not to be Jedi knights, he would have to accept that.

Leia thought back on her younger years. She was educated by tutors and she'd sometimes watch the kids from the nearby schools running and laughing and carrying on as the day ended. She envied them sometimes. They seemed so carefree. Then she'd return to her lessons. There were things other than academics for a royal child, there were instructions in etiquette, protocol, dancing and fencing lessons, lessons in weaponry, self defense classes. And then there were the state functions and dinners that she had to attend. Winter, who'd been adopted by her parents as well, was raised in the same way, but Winter seemed to be far more comfortable with life in the palace. Leia was always up for pranks; Winter was regal in her bearing and found such activities undignified. There were some days that were carefree, but Leia had cherished them precisely because they were so rare.

Jaina, Jacen and Anakin spent their days experiencing what Leia and Han considered to be age appropriate activities: playing, reading, singing songs, learning colors and shapes, counting, using their imaginations, laughing. Hearing their children laugh was magical to Han and Leia; it allowed them to vicariously enjoy being the kids they were never allowed to be. Watching Han sitting on the floor playing with them was one of Leia's favorite things to see.

She wondered how Han felt about his father re-entering his life. He hadn't said much, but then again, he hadn't known for very long that Jonash Solo was in fact related to him.

Leia thought back to the night Luke had revealed that Vader was his father - and that she was his sister, meaning that Vader was also her father. That had blown her mind, and not in a direction she liked. Luke had helped Leia explain their lineage from Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala. Leia was nervous that once Han knew of this, he would break off their engagement. But he took the news with his usual good humor. Leia remembered him saying, 'If I based my opinions of people on who their parents were, I'd have to hate nearly everyone. Myself included.' He'd made it much easier for Leia to move on.

But how much had she moved on? What effect would the re-entry of Han's father into the family have on her husband? On their children? Would they ever let him see his grandchildren? There were a lot of unanswered questions. Maybe he'd disappear willingly, or, failing that, Han would shove him away, instructing him to never bother them again.

Or perhaps Han and Jonash would get to know each other well enough and Han would feel that he posed no threat and should meet her and their children.

Her comm went off, and it was Han. "Hey sweetheart, I was wondering how you'd feel about my father coming to dinner? I'm pretty sure he won't steal the good flatware."

"Are you sure we should be exposing the kids to this? Because if he's just going to drop in and then leave again, that could upset them a lot."

"I'm not sure what he's gonna do," Han admitted. "But he really would like to meet you and the kids."

"Can you trust him?"

"Better than I'd trust Lando."

"You still don't trust Lando."

"Neither do you, but we still let him visit." Han was on video, giving her the lopsided grin she cherished.

"You know I can't cook."

"I think I can take care of that. Okay if we pick up the kids from school?"

"All right."

"Believe me, he won't do anything illegal or immoral, at least not in front of the kids. And, I told him that I shoot first."