Thank you so so so much for your comments- I agree, it's a bit out of character for Elizabeth to lose all that money- you NEVER put all your eggs in one basket, or all that money in one investment. I'm a liason fan so the way they've written Jason and Monica as of now is super disappointing. I wish the writers would feature more Elizabeth scenes then they do now (am I the only one who's noticed that she's on for like one day a week? If she had such a fan base to make them rehire her then they should of featured more of her!). I think, at least for now in my story, there is room for a triangle (or more with Matt)- we'll just have to see… :)
Btw I've added two chapters today in response to all the great comments I've received so far!
Elizabeth checked the messages on her cellphone as she waited for Ewan to arrive. This was one of the very few free times that she had to herself. She was at first resistant to spending it at therapy. But working with Ewan had allowed herself to open up and relieve herself of the baggage she'd been carrying for a long time.
"You know" Ewan said as he sat down, "you're the kind of person that only reveals what you want people to see- even here in therapy. You seemed very understanding of Monica when you told me that she had been angry over not knowing Jake. But yesterday I saw something totally different."
Elizabeth groaned, "I tried to be understanding. But she's just unwilling to leave me alone. It's like she watches me all the time, waiting for a mistake so that she can get me fired. I feel like I'm constantly walking on broken glass and it's driving me insane. As if I don't have enough to deal with."
"So. If you could say, tell Monica exactly how you feel without having the risk of getting fired what would you say?"
"I don't think that's a good-"
"Therapy is a new experience- open yourself up and try this out maybe you'll feel better. Maybe you'll feel worse. But you won't know until you try."
"Alright. I would tell her that the decision to keep Jake's paternity a secret was not my decision alone- it was also Jason's. She's so willing to forgive her son, but in my eyes she is his mother and so he should have been the one to tell her. And in the end Jason is the one who didn't fight for his family, he chose his life over me and the boys just like he chose his life over the Quartermaine's all those years ago. If there is anybody who should be able to understand what I went through it's her. Instead, she insists on blaming me. She forgets that I was her late daughters best friend, and that I have saved members of her family including Jason countless times. If it weren't for me she wouldn't have a family. She lives in a damn mansion with butlers and maids and I live in a small house with my two boys, making ends meet on my own. And while I wouldn't change that for all the tea in China- she'll never know what it is like to be in my shoes. To worry about paying the electricity or how you can't afford to send your little boy- the reason you get up and live every day- on a trip with his school. To stay up all hours of the night hoping that the boiler won't break, or the car won't give you problems. So everytime I see Monica Quartermaine's face I can't feel sorry for her because I can't see past her haughty martyred attitude to a caring woman who would have been a great grandmother to a little boy who never knew her."
"Well done Elizabeth" Ewan whispered as tears welled in Elizabeth's eyes. She let out a jagged sob and whispered, "you have no idea what it's like to live with constant reminders of all your mistakes and everything that they cost you". In that instant she felt the cold strong arms of Ewan Keenan wrap around her in a strong embrace.
"I promise" he whispered into her brown curls, "everything will be okay Elizabeth".
And for a brief second she beleived him. Everything in her ached to believe him. But experience said otherwise and she pulled stiffly out of his embrace, appoligizing.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to get all- emotional" she took a tissue off of the small table beside her and wiped her nose as a form of distraction from his probing eyes.
"Emotional is usually good in therapy" Ewan chuckled. His eyes appraised her every move.
"You know" Elizabeth laughed, "when I first found out that I was pregnant with Jake I told Jason that I was dead set on being a single mom. I think" she sighed now, a wistful expression on her face. "I think even then I had no idea what I was asking for. Being a single mom is like trying to live with one eye closed. You have a good idea of what you are, where you're going, what you're seeing- but you can't be one hundred percent shore. There's always that doubt there. That you're missing that other half. And sometimes things hit you that you could've seen coming if you only had both eyes. It throws you off balance, but, at least it keeps things interesting."
"You worry alot about what you can't or don't provide for your boys" Ewan pointed out.
"Don't all moms do?"
"I suppose, but we're talking about you. I want you to try to look at all the things that you do give to your boys. Instead of focusing on the lack of things focus on the plenty. Avoid what if's and uncertainty. Look strictly at the facts. Even things like toys, bedtime routines, dinner table traditions- everything that you take the time to do without noticing. Don't take yourself for granted, and your kids won't either."
"Well I'll try- but I can't garuntee anything" Elizabeth replied cynically.
"That's all I'm asking. So I'll see you next week then?"
"Yes, listen Ewan. About Monica, thanks for standing up for me. If you hadn't shown up I don't know what would've happened- I'm sure she would've had my job at least."
"Don't worry about it. It was my fault, I shouldn't of asked you to get that file in the first place. I just hope that Monica and you will figure this out, maybe she'll look to find some common ground with you?"
"I doubt it" Elizabeth laughed her hand on the door.
"If she did- would you give her a chance to make things right?"
"Yes I would" she said seriously.
"I believe you" Ewan smiled.
"Thank you" Elizabeth whispered and left.