Note: I am not Stephenie Meyer nor do I own the Twilight series.
A million thanks to everyone who alerted me that Esme's maiden name is Platt!
"...and then I made a face at her and said, 'YES, it is absolutely necessary that I visit with my friend in the hospital, didn't I tell you before? She is in a critical condition! I don't know how long she has left!' And then... wait, Esme? Esme! Are you listening at all?"
The upward inflection of Alexandra's last statement—a clear sign of a question—brought me back to reality. I'd forgotten Alexandra and I were having a conversation. Or, rather, a one-sided monologue...
"Huh?" I asked, groggily, knowing that she was expecting a responce.
"I knew it! You weren't listening at all, were you?" Alexandra frowned unhappily, clearly disappointed by my lack of interest.
For a moment, I felt guilty. Alexandra had been nothing but cheerfully talkative for the past few hours, her presence a healthy distraction I probably needed but did not crave.
For once, I gave her my full attention, meeting her gaze as I looked up at her with—what I hoped to be—an earnest expression.
"I'm sorry, Alexandra. I'm trying—really. But I'm still a bit drowsy after all the medications they gave me..." I trailed off, my voice heavy with implications. I loved Alexandra and all her redeeming qualities, though subtlety certainly was not one of them. Nor attunedness, especially when it did not coencide with her wishes. And now, more than anything, Alexandra wanted an active listener—someone to sit on the edge of their seats as she concluded a petty, irrelevant, melodramatic story and, unhesitatingly, answered her infrequent questions, as she rarely paused long enough when speaking to ask a question.
I felt sorry that I could not be the active listener Alexandra craved. But not enough to overshadow my insatiable craving for Doctor Cullen.
Mmmm, I thought, my eyes closing in contentment. Even his name sparked excitement and butterflies in my stomach—surely my craving for his company, even in my thoughts, was unhealthy?
I wanted to think—or, more specifically, fantasize—about him. Relive the feeling of his cool, strong hands entwined with mine. The smell of his wintry, delicious breath as he whispered private things to me. In my daydreams, his whispers were not mere comforts he felt obligated to fufill, though I desperately yearned for any whispers—no matter how professional—from him.
His whispers in my daydreams, on the other hand, were not at all professional...
"Esme? Es-meee?" Alexandra called in a sing-song voice as she distorted my name, waving a hand in front of my face. I must have drifted away as I thought of Doctor Cullen. Wretching my eyelids open, I was relieved to see that Alexandra's face was playfully impatient—not grudgingly.
"Alex-andraaa?" I sang, trying to be enthusiastic, matching her playful tone. Alexandra's happiness effected mine—I felt my own mood lift remarkably.
"You didn't hear the beginning of my story, silly! I was just telling you about how I convinced the nurse at the front desk to let me come in to see you. I was underage, so I had to tell a teeny white lie. I said you were in a critical condition and that I didn't know, and I quote, 'how much time you had left'! Can you believe it?" Alexandra's words came out distorted in the end as she nearly doubled over in giggles.
I laughed in spite of myself, unable to conceal my elation. Alexandra's happiness was one less problem I had to worry about, thus, resulting in more free time to daydream about—
"Say, have you tried that chocolate mousse? I'm going to go get some from the cafe." Alexandra's voice promptly interrupted my train of thought—and for that, I was grateful.
"No, I can't say I have." I said truthfully. As Alexandra backed out of the room, I suddenly remembered the critical information I needed from her.
"Alexandra—wait! I have a question." I started, glad to have remembered in time. I beckoned for her to come to the side of my bed, hoping to prevent any passerbys and the nurses—or worse—from hearing my embarrassing question.
My eyes nervously raked over the mundane hospital room, verifying our solitude. I sucked in some air, my heartbeat accellerating as I hesitantly prepared to ask a question, though I was absolutely dying to know its answer.
"When is Doctor Cullen coming back to check on me?" I asked in a quiet, unsteady voice, hating the sudden craving that flared up inside me everytime his name was mentioned.
Alexandra was silent.
"Er... I mean, do you think he will come back soon?" I hoped Alexandra could not hear the note of desperation in my voice as I rushed to fill the suddenly uncomfortable silence. My stomach churned as I nervously glanced up at Alexandra, assessing her reaction.
Alexandra's face blushed a deep shade of scarlet, and though she bit her lip with enough force that it turned white, she seemed to be fighting a smile. Her eyes held a mischevious glint that was normally only reserved for 'taboo' topics—as she liked to call them. Our slightly embarassed, slightly thrilled discussions of lovemaking and whatnot.
Finally, losing the fight to her excitement,—as I knew she would—Alexandra's face lit up with a toothy, cheek-stretching grin. A clump of blonde hair—her overgrown bangs—fell in an annoying disarray in her eyes, though, for once, she did not promptly smooth it into place.
Instead, she leaned in closely, her elbows pressing against my metal lining of my bed. Her face was only inches from mine.
"That... doctor... has got to be the most beautiful man I've ever seen!" Though she intended to whisper, Alexandra's voice now squealed and rose several octives, exposing her sudden infatuation. An infatuation I knew all too well.
Sighing in a theatrical way, Alexandra clasped her hand over her heart, gracefully reclining in her seat and crossing her legs. Closing her eyes in a dreamy manner, Alexandra pretended to fan herself—a mannerism we had adopted a while ago while imagining ourselves as elegant, fashionable women from the Victorian era. But now, in her current state of infatuation, it seemed almost fitting.
"Yes, he is." I sighed, agreeing. Of course she finds him attractive, I mentally chastised myself. I would have been a fool to think otherwise. And though, logically, it did not make sense to feel anything more than admiration and lust towards the man, I could not seem to pinpoint the sudden pricks of annoyance, sparked by Alexandra's infatuation.
And though I knew it was wrong, hypocritical, and silly, I could not help but acknowledge the peevish feeling as jealousy.
Vehemently rejecting the mere possibility that I could feel competetive for the attention of a handsome doctor—an adult, no less—I ignored the pricks of jealousy, focusing on the task at hand.
"So, you never did answer me..." I began, my voice teasing and playful... on the surface.
Alexandra's eyes flew open, as if the sound of my voice had interrupted her from a happy and restful daydream.
It probably had.
"So, do you know when Doctor Cullen is coming back to check on me?" I pressed, aware that impatience and urgence had begun trickling into my voice. I hoped Alexandra hadn't noticed.
Though, clearly, someone else had.
Much to my shock, as well as Alexandra's, an all-too familiar voice laughed behind us, coming from the doorway.
"Hello, Esme. I am pleased to see that you are better rested. I trust you slept well?" He asked wryly, a smile playing on the edges of his lips.
Mortification shadowed my every other emotion. It clouded over me—overwhelming, sudden, and powerful. I felt my face flush in chagrin as I realized Doctor Cullen had probably heard...
My question. My embarrassing, uncalled-for question meant only for Alexandra's ears...if that. And here stood Doctor Cullen, in all his breathtaking glory, in the doorway of my hospital room.
He could not have heard more than my question. He could not have. Because, if he had heard Alexandra's declaration of lust for him and my vehement agreement...
I cringed simply imagining it. Oh, the embarrassment! My heart hammered in my chest as chagrin flooded my system.
Smiling kindly, but knowingly,—I added mentally, much to my horror—Doctor Cullen gracefully made his way to my side. He glanced first at his clipboard, then at Alexandra.
"Hello, Alexandra. It is a pleasure seeing you again." The words were flowing and smooth, but I felt the undercurrent of amusement in them. With a flush of embarrasment, I wondered how Alexandra had managed to introduce herself to him. I tried not to remember the last time she made a show of introducing herself to an attractive boy at the store, having given into her theatrical tendencies. It had ended badly.
"Y-you too, uh, Doctor Cullen..." Alexandra stammered, unconsciously staring at him, admiring his features. If I didn't watch myself, I would probably be doing the same...
Doctor Cullen did not give her a chance to compose herself.
"I'm sorry, Alexandra, but I have some information to share with Esme regarding her injury. So if you wouldn't mind...?" His smooth voice with its lilting accent was so unbearably wonderful to listen to, I almost missed the intent of his words.
After a moment of delayed reaction, Alexandra suddenly came to her senses, looking at the door, and seeming to see it for the first time.
"Oh! Uh, sure, I don't mind." She scrambled awkwardly to her feet, throwing me a knowing glance as she went.
"Bye Esme! Hope you feel better." She called politely before shutting the door conspicuously behind her, though it had been open in the first place.
A sly, breathtaking smirk sat on Carlisle's too-perfect lips. His ethereal beauty stunned me for a moment, and I looked away from him, embarrassed, a moment too late.
Just in time for me to realize Carlisle and I were in a room—though in a hospital, no less—totally alone, with time to be spared and expectations to be met.
I gulped.
Hey guys! So... what do you think??
Are there any scenes you would like to see between Carlisle and Esme? I love suggestions!
Pretty, pretty please leave me a review.
Merci beaucoup! (thankyouverymuch)
-xxtwilight