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Chapitre III : Camping
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Dean had been cursing for more than half an hour. Why had he ended up agreeing to this?
Besides, how did he end up building this tent that refused to cooperate, despite the powerful hammer blows and all the insults he could think of ?
Chadwick was laughing his heart out and tried to help his father who refused to let go anyway.
« Dad, we should wait for Castiel!»
« What is that supposed to mean ? That I'm too stupid to plant four pegs?»
« Six» his son corrected.
« Hey, gimme a break, will ya? » Dean was really upset, his t-shirt was sticky because of the sweat. The sun had reached its zenith, the temperature had reached about 90°F.
All he could dream of was to dive into the lake down their makeshift base camp.
He cursed Castiel and his stupid idea for a week-end activity.
Where was he anyway ? He had left about an hour ago with Jewel to pick up some wood for the fire.
He was pretty sure Castiel was hiding behind a tree, laughing at him with his daughter.
He raised his eyes and looked at his son who smiled at him, which he found even more irritating.
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Chadwick had jumped to the ceiling when Castiel had proposed a family week-end trip four days before.
Dean hadn't really reacted when he heard the word « nature »… He thought walking in the woods would be involved, but certainly not a whole week-end living in the woods, trying to avoid mosquitoes eating you alive and hurting his back, sleeping on a ground which had nothing to match his comfortable mattress at home.
« That's a good idea» he said, hoping his first morning coffee would kick in fast. « A little family activity will do us good besides, the weather forecast is ideal. »
Jewel was extremely excited about it.
« Apache…Apache... Dad said yes. We are going to sleep in the woods! » she claimed as she rushed out of the kitchen with the dog on her heels.
« Sleep in the woods ? » Dean repeated, putting down his coffee mug on the table. He suddenly looked mortified.
« You didn't let me finish, Dean » Castiel smiled, biting in his toasted bread.
« You mean… I just committed to sleep out in the open ? »
« Yes you did » Castiel was laughing.
« No way ! » Dean snapped back, standing up. « I hate this. It's full of bugs and the only time I have been on a camping trip, there were thunderstorms and organized mosquitoes raids. THERE IS NO WAY I AM GOING THROUGH THIS AGAIN !»
« Dad, you promised » his son reminded.
« It's just for one night, Dean. Try to make an effort, for a change. »
« Oh you, cut it out ! We all know you love to roll in the grass, so of course you're excited about this. I'm a city guy, a real one who loves the smell of CO² and the sound of roaring engines.» Nevertheless, Dean felt already trapped somehow.
« Don't get mad, it's useless » Castiel stopped being cheerful. « I will ask Jo to come with us instead. I promised that activity to the kids. I thought you'd be happy to join. »
« Don't you start! You know damn well I love to do things with the kids. It's just that camping and me… well, we don't get along so well. »
« We had a great time with Mom last time » Chadwick said in a faint whisper.
« You bet. Those bloody mosquitoes drew up to the last blood drop out of me.»
« Do you know you can buy mosquito nets and sprays ? » Castiel replied casually.
« Yeah, thanks for the tip, smart ass; but I wasn't gonna wander with a net on my face the whole time, right ? And that damn spray wasn't working.»
« Mom and I didn't get bit.»
« Of course, you weren't. Those sons of bitches were targeting me all along. »
« Just bitches » Castiel corrected.
« What, bitches ? »
« Those bitches were targeting you. Only the females are biting, not the males. »
« Screw you » Dean shouted as he left the kitchen. « No way I'm gonna get fucked in the bush."
« He'll come » Chadwick smiled as he swallowed a spoonful of cereals.
« I know » Castiel winked back with a smile.
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They all hopped in Castiel's Ford early morning the following Saturday. Dean had reluctantly agreed to come along. Three supplications and one sad look from Jewel had finally convinced him. However, he had refused that his baby, his beloved Impala, be forcefully dragged in the woods.
The kids loaded the trunk: two tents lent by Jo, a portable stove, food, an emergency kit and they were on their way. Chadwick and Jewel sat on the back seat with Apache leaning his head on Castiel's shoulder, driver side.
Dean hopped in last.
« Dammit ! 7 a.m. This is not my idea of a relaxation week-end » He mumbled as he attached his safety belt.
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And here he was again, grumbling like hell. He had barely managed to plant two pegs of the tent he was supposed to share with his children.
« Shit ! … Goddammit ! »
« Dean ! » Castiel was not happy with Dean's cursing so much.
« Here you are ! You've been gone for ages. Where have you been ? »
« Jewel wanted to look around. »
« Oh yeah ? What about us ? »
« Dean, I offered my help to set up the tents, you declined, remember ? » he replied throwing an armful of wood on the ground.
« Where is the tent, Daddy?» Jewel asked with such innocence as she threw a few smaller branches on Castiel pile. Apache sat next to her.
« SHIT ! » Dean snapped. He threw the hammer on the ground and walked away. He could hear his son start to laugh and Castiel begin to work on the tents.
Dean knew he had to calm down. Indeed, this week-end was meant to be relaxing and he refused to spoil the party by being a pain in the ass; after all, this was supposed to last for two days only.
Next time…
There won't be a next time… he thought, as he ragefully kicked a clump of earth.
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Eventually, he started to relax, softly rocked by the silence of the place which was filled with only bird melodies.
He sat on a fallen trunk and admired Peanlow Lake in front of him. It was hot, but at least he had found some shadow.
Memories suddenly started to creep in, like dying waves on a beach.
Tessa…
Several years ago, he had accepted to go camping with her on the West Coast, in one of those big national parks that so favored. She had been a den mother in her youth. Dean hated nature. But he loved Tessa.
They had spent a week-end in the open, just the three of them. Jewel had remained with Jo as she was too young at the time.
It was their last holidays together.
He sighed. He missed her so much all of a sudden and his heart sank when he realized he hadn't thought of her in such a way for a long time. He felt guilty but then again, life had to go on and she wouldn't be happy to see him give up on life.
He smiled: happiness was at hand, again, he knew Tessa was watching from up above. He knew she would rejoice.
For his family. This precious family: Chadwick, Jewel, Jo, Bobby and even Balty. But especially Castiel…
He wondered what would have happened if Castiel hadn't been there.
He knew he owed him so much and thought he ought to tell him more often. Obviously Castiel owed them just as much. His own family had rejected him when he had confessed his homosexuality. Dean's family had welcomed him as a true member of the family and Castiel felt the sacrifice was worth it. Yet was it sacrifice, in the end? Dean smiled. There was no sacrifice in their lives. Only a magical bond. An extraordinary family.
He got up, leaning his hands on his knees.
« Two days, man. Try to make an effort. »
When he joined the others, he realized several hours had gone by. His stomach was there to remind him of the basic necessities.
The tents were properly set up, next to each other. A small one for Castiel, a larger one for Dean and the kids.
Jewel was playing with the dog, throwing a wooden stick in the lake. Apache ran till the bank, hesitated for a brief moment and then jumped in the water.
Chadwick was sitting next to Castiel who had started the portable stove.
He startled when he heard a noise behind his back.
« Dean. »
« I'm starving » he said taking a deep inhale… "Smells like grilled sausages."
« JEWEL » Chadwick called out loud. Their father was back, meaning they could finally eat.
« Are you all right ? » Castiel gently asked.
« Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry about my angry outburst earlier » he said, rubbing the back of his neck, feeling ashamed.
« Don't worry, the kids and I had fun. »
« I don't doubt it. » he replied, sitting next to him.
They ate. The laughed. They fought with spoons using corn as ammunition. Apache was running all over the place in a desperate attempt to catch all the corn kernels falling from the plates as godsend offered to his bottomless stomach.
Afterwards, the children wanted to swim in the lake. Castiel refused : digestion safety rules first. Dean decided to take a nap. He had worked late the night before and was dog tired. Castiel went for a walk with the kids. Apache refused to follow and remained by Dean's side. Jumping in the lake so many times earlier had apparently drained him too.
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When the trio came back to the camp, Dean was already awake and waiting for them. He was bare chested, wearing black Bermuda shorts only.
« Aren't you gonna put your bathing suits on? » He was all smiles.
The kids ran to the tent, screaming and pushing each other to get there first under the tired supervision of Apache sitting at the entrance.
« Aren't you? » he asked Castiel who kept staring at the lake.
« Yeah, sure» He looked as if he had been lost in painful memories for a little while.
« Cass ? » Dean walked towards him.
« Are you OK, man ? »
« Yeah sure. Don't worry. » Castiel smiled and headed for his tent.
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Less than five minutes later, the kids were all set : Chadwick was wearing red shorts and Jewel a lovely bikini. She ran to the father, handing him the swim-trainers. When he was done inflating them, Castiel showed up, ready to swim.
Dean had always been impressed by the stature of his friend. It was not the first time he was seeing him bare-chested yet it was always a bit of a surprise to see that Castiel was hiding solid muscles behind an apparently fragile-looking silhouette.
He looked away when he realized Castiel was looking at him too.
« Come here, little girl» he adjusted the swim-trainers on his daughter's arms.
« Why do I have to put them on, Dad…I can swim. »
« I know, baby, but it's dangerous. And please, stay close to us, understood ? »
« Yes » she nodded, pawing the ground.
Chadwick had already jumped in the water, screaming like a fool and laughing because of the temperature shock.
« Oh God, it's freezing » he said as he started to swim.
« Stay close to the bank, Chad » his father shouted.
« C'mon on, all of you! » Chad called.
Dean took his daughter in his arms and felt her little arms squeeze him around the neck.
« Ready ? » he asked with a smile.
« Yeaaaaaaaaah ! »
He took a run-up and jumped in the water, his body curled up in a ball.
He screamed even more when Jewel laughed her heart out, wiping the water from her face.
The water was indeed rather cold.
« Oh shit… C'mon Cass, the water is good » Dean was lying of course.
« I can see that » Castiel replied as he reached the bank.
He hesitated for a while… which actually seemed like an eternity.
« APACHE ! » Dean called at the top of his lungs. The dog jumped on his feet and ran towards the lake.
Castiel didn't see it coming and suddenly the dog jumped on his back and pushed him in the water.
Castiel flailed for a little while, trying to regain his balance at the surface. The Winchesters were laughing out loud.
He emerged from the water and brushed his hair off his eyes.
« Son of a bitch!» He said, splashing water on Dean with his hand.
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Then there were water fights, swimming races that Chadwick won every time, a volley ball match with the ball Castiel took a while to inflate and which Apache destroyed less than an hour later. The sound of the explosion in his mouth scared him so much that he ran away and found refuge, all wet and muddy, in Castiel's tent.
« Dammit, Apache !» he shouted as he swam back to the land.
His tent resembled a swimming pool, but the dog seemed so panicked that Castiel was reluctant to scold him. He petted him instead, took his sleeping bag out to dry in the sun.
« Cass… »
« Coming. Gimme two minutes… »
« Take the soft ball in the tent » Chadwick shouted.
He threw the ball and wanted to go for a run-up. Bad luck. All the climbing up and down the bank had transformed the place into a mud pool and …
His foot slipped…
The other three watched as he flew up, his legs and arms shuffling into the air before he harshly landed face first on the lake surface.
There was no sound. They were all looking at the precise spot where Castiel had « landed ». He reappeared, a bit shamefaced but when the Winchesters started to laugh real loud, he happily joined them.
« I think I'll wee-wee in the water » Jewel was laughing real loud.
« It's disgusting » Chedwick shouted, swimming away from her sister.
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Dean was sipping his beer, sitting on a log, facing the lake ... Although they were exhausted, the children were playing a game of cards near the fire that Castiel had lit a few minutes earlier.
The latter came out of his tent, dressed in short pants and jean shirt with sleeves rolled up.
« Kids, go get dressed, you're gonna catch a cold.»
They were still wearing their bathing suits… so was their father.
They got up without discussion and obediently headed to their tent.
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Castiel examined his sleeping bag hoping that Apache hadn't ruined it during his panic attack.
He then sat by Dean's side, far enough to respect his personal space which was so precious to him, - except when he was with his kids – yet close enough to feel his warmth.
« Thanks, Cass » Dean whispered. « It's been ages since I had so much fun. »
« Me too » Castiel smiled.
Dean opened the portable cooler on his left and grabbed a beer which he put next to Castiel who was staring at the lake surface.
The sun was slowly setting down.
« What are you thinking about ? »
« My father » he replied, looking down.
« We often went camping, we used to love it, just the two of us. Moments for ourselves. » he let out a long sigh.
« I'm sorry, Cass »
« What would you be sorry for ? »
« I'm sorry it ended this way with your old man. »
« So am I »
« I've asked myself many times how I would react if one of the kids told me one day they were … gay »
« So ? »
« Honestly, Cass… » he sipped from this own bottle and stared at the lake.
« It'd be a surprise. After all, I must be like the majority of parents, dreaming of a wedding with a white dress, hoping to be a grand-father one day, you know, that kind of stuff.»
« One thing doesn't preclude the other, you know. Gay people are allowed to get married in several states and nothing prevents us from having kids » he said in a soft tone, without passing any judgement. He understood Dean's reaction, it was only natural.
« Yeah, I know, but it's not the same. It's probably due to some echo of my old-fashion education» he tried to laugh about it yet he felt uncomfortable somehow.
« It's just a matter of perspective »
« I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings? » Dean sounded worried.
« Would you banish Chadwick or Jewel if they were gay ? »
« Are you out of your mind ? » Dean replied, feeling a little outraged.
« They're my kids and I love them. All I want is for them to be happy. Of course, I'd be hurt, but I'd never, do you hear me, NEVER let them down »
« There lies all the difference. My father never forgave me for the choice I made »
« As if there were anything to be forgiven! »
« There was for him, it was a sin, the ultimate sin, the worst of them all. His son, whom he was so proud of, the son he claimed to love, was nothing but an abomination in God's eyes and his own. »
Dean felt the distress weighing on his friend's shoulders.
« Cass » he said in a faint whisper.
« He asked me to make a choice. And I did. He threw me out of his house when I was seventeen. We never spoke again. I was visiting my mother when he was away. If it weren't for Tessa, I would have let me drifting away »
« Don't get me wrong, Cass… But as far as I can tell, this man wasn't behaving like a father. How can one deny his own flesh, his own blood ? I can't figure it out.»
« I don't blame him, you know. He was a good father. »
« A good father? He rejected you, Cass! … He threw you away like garbage. Moreover, he'll never know what he lost. »
Dean drank the rest of his beer.
« But we know what we gained» he stood up and their eyes met. « C'mon. Let's prepare supper before the children scream they're starving»
« The children ? » Castiel winked.
« Okay, I'm starving too. There, happy ? »
« Let me finish my beer. I'll be there in a minute. Start the oven… if you still know how to do that… » he said with a big smile.
« Bitch »
« Assbutt »
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The ate in silence. The kids were exhausted and would surely go to bed soon. They actually barely touched their food.
Less than an hour later, they were sleeping like logs.
Castiel was cleaning the dishes in the lake when Dean joined him.
« Care for a last beer ? »
« I'll join you when I'm done with this. »
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He sat on the trunk which had become their official bench. The sunset tainted the lake surface in shades of orange.
« SHIT » Dean grumbled as he swapped a mosquito on his arm. « Bitch » he added flicking the dead mosquito away.
Castiel joined him and handed him a roller.
« Here, roll this on the places where they might attack and it'll keep them away.»
« I might as well roll if all over my body. These bitches love me… »
Castiel tried not to laugh out loud.
« Come here and admire the sunset with me. »
Castiel sat at the proper distance, as he always did.
They watched the dying glimmer of sunset in silence…
Dean felt relaxed, released somehow… here with the kids… and Castiel.
He smiled for himself and thought he'd never trade place with anyone for anything. He had his share of bad luck. His father was never there for him. His mother had died too soon. And his beloved Tessa…
On the other hand, there had been so many happy moments : his kids, his little treasures his sister Jo, a gift from Heaven his uncle Bobby, whom he treated like a father.
He smiled when he thought of Balty, this permanent bright light shining down on their lives. He often wondered why Castiel and Balty never considered to move in together. Balty had said they didn't love each other; they were mad about each other, which of course was a totally different matter …
Dean had felt uncomfortable at first when he saw them exchange tender moments, stolen kisses, hands reaching out for each other. They were reserved in public yet Dean had caught them more than once in the arms of each other. There was something touching about it. They were together yet not a couple.
Balty had been part of their life for six years now. Dean had almost accepted anything he was by now.
And then, there was Castiel… Almost ten years of a friendship he'd ever thought possible at first…
He glanced at his friend his big blue eyes were glowing in the dying sunset.
Who'd have thought that Dean Winchester, acknowledged macho man, would make friends with a confirmed homosexual, up to the point of living under the same roof ? For sure, life had given him great lessons of tolerance and challenging.
« What is it ? » Castiel asked, intrigued by Dean's silence.
« Nothing. I just thought we're blessed, the kids and I… »
Castiel frowned…His head was tilting a bit, as usual, which Dean always found cute.
« I don't know if I've told you enough, but Thank You, Cass… thanks for everything. I don't know how we'd have made it without you. »
« I should be the one to say thanks. Thank you for making me a member of this family. Thank you for accepting me as I am. Thank you for being there for me.»
Dean turned his head and looked at the lake.
« Some kind of family, huh ? »
« The best…I wouldn't trade it for all the tea in China. »
« Neither would I »
They finished their beer and headed for their respective tent, with a good-night nod…
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There was a scream in the middle of the night ... Castiel rushed out of his tent, with shaggy hair and a wrinkled face. The dog was standing straight in front of the Winchesters tent, growling.
" Dean? Kids ? "
" There's a monster," the little girl screamed.
" Apache! " Castiel ordered the dog that rushed to the back of the tent.
Jewel desperately hung around the neck of his father who was not that proud either. Chadwick, sitting on the ground was grumbling, with his head buried in his hands.
"It's a raccoon, Jewel"
"My ass! Have you seen the size of that shadow?... And how the tent started to move? I'd say it was a bear " his father replied.
" Daddy… there are no bears around here "
" How would you know ? "
" Chicken! " he said, lying down again.
« Chad…Don't go back to sleep » his father ordered.
« Daddy, over there !»
Castiel, bare-chested wearing only white pajamas pants, grabbed a branch from the wood pile as an improvised weapon and walked slowly around the tent.
« Apache, sit ! C'mon you guys and have a look at your so-called monster » Castiel shouted.
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Dean joined him, frowning. Jewel was hiding behind her father, clinging tight to his shirt. Chadwick was following reluctantly as his father had ordered him not to stay behind, in case there would be a wolf or a bear looking for easy food.
« Pa' … »
« Don't you « Pa' » me. Shit, what are we doing here. Goddammit ! »
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« Gimme the torch lamp, Chad » Dean ordered.
His son held out his flashlight.
Standing before them, Castiel and Apache. By their side, a young stag entangled in the tensioner.
" Ohhhhhhh " Jewel exclaimed.
"Dean, could you please help me deliver this bloodthirsty killer? " Castiel smirked.
"Oh, cut it out, don't you dare…" Dean muttered.
Jewel stepped forward.
"No sweetie. Step back. It could hurt you with his antlers. He's scared and might hurt you unintentionally "
" But they are so small." She noticed, willing to get closer anyhow.
"Chad, keep your sister away from here." Dean warned, being cautious.
Dean was trying to hold the head of the deer still as Castiel did the best he could to free the antlers stuck in the knot. The deer struggled, threatening to collapse the tent.
"Watch out , Cass ... He's gonna tear the canvas "
" Hey, I'm doing the best I can here, but that animal is pretty strong "
" C'mon, move over."
Castiel moved aside and blocked the animal. Dean freed the stag in no time. However, the animal panicked and turned around. Dean didn't step step aside. The frightened deer rushed ahead and torn the canvas. Alerted by the noise, Apache started to bark, frightening the wild animal even more. It rushed towards Dean, knocked him down and stepped on his crotch.
He fled into the woods, with the dog on his trail.
" Apache ... Here ! " Castiel shouted. The dog returned at once.
They all looked at Dean writhing in pain, one eye on the damaged canvas.
Jewel was holding her brother by the waist. Chadwick focused the light on his father.
« Dean ? » Castiel sounded worried, yet hesitated between laughter and concern.
« I hate camping » Dean puffed, curled up on the ground.
« It's official. Deers are blood-thirsty killers » Castiel announced.
He heard Dean starting to laugh, yet still moaning, holding his crotch with both hands.
« Just you wait! When I'm able to stand up, I'm gonna show you what I'm made of. »
« I'm sure this will not a-moose us ! »
Chadwick bursted out laughing for good. Jewel didn't get the pun. However, as she heard them all laughing, she involuntarily added more fun to the scene when she let go of her brother and turned to her father.
« Does it hurt, Daddy? »
The others laughed even harder.
Four o'clock in the morning… the woods were filled with echoes of happiness.
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The next day was dedicated to hiking - and this time, Dean decided to get involved - chicken skewers, hide-and-seek games to please Jewel. These eventually ended up in a fight as the dog kept on betraying them all. There was some groaning and laughing. They ended up on the ground, rolling over and biting the dust.
At the end of the day, they jumped in the lake. Then came the time to head back home, with some regret ...
They dismantled the tents in silence.
No need to insist to get the kids to sleep. By 8 p.m. they were all set for the night
« Shall we go camping again, Daddy? » Jewel begged.
« Would you like that, pumpkin ?» Dean said, softly stroking her cheek.
« Oh yes ! » her tone was enthusiast.
« We'll see about that» forcing her to head for her bedroom.
« C'mon, say goodnight to Cass and try to sleep now. »
Castiel was unpacking the bags in the living room.
« Good night, Castiel »
« Good night, sweetie »
« We'll go again camping. Daddy said yes. »
« Really ? » he looked up at Dean standing behind his daughter, one hand on her shoulder.
« Chad, are you coming ? »
Chadwick gave Apache a big hug and followed his father.
« It was really great ! » he said to Castiel.
« Yeah, it was. »
He gave Castiel a quick kiss on the cheek as he always did. Like his father. Soon enough, he would simply nod to salute him.
« Good night, Chad »
« Bye, Castiel… See you tomorrow. »
Castiel watch them leave the room, followed by Dean.
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« One last beer ? » Dean proposed.
« No thanks. I'm dead tired.. I've got a busy day tomorrow. I really need to sleep» Castiel replied with a smile on his face.
« 'Nite, Cass »
« 'Nite, Dean »
« You know what ? » Dean called as Castiel was leaving with his bag in his hand.
« What ? » he turned around.
« I enjoyed this week-end… I think we should go camping more often »
« I think so too »
Dean nodded and headed to the kitchen. Castiel threw his bag on his shoulder and glanced one more time at the tents on the floor.
He remembered the face of his father. The memories… the wounds.
He saw the soft ball in one of the bags and smiled.
New memories… laughters…
This was his family, far from ordinary…
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End of chapter
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See you in two weeks if you fell like it
Thank you