Naruto was so distracted with his thoughts over the Byakugan, that he bumped into someone while walking away from the academy.
"Oh, sorry about that," said Naruto distantly.
"How dare you touch the noble personage of- is that a rabbit on your head?" The speaker was a male Hyuga a little older than Naruto.
Naruto placed a hand on the rabbit. "So it is."
"Never mind, it is not my fate to associate with people… unworthy of me."
"Fate?" asked Naruto.
"Yes," said the Hyuga. "You are fated to be a weak ninja, unworthy of my association."
Naruto raised his eyebrows, finding argument to be too bothersome. "Who are you fated to be?"
The Hyuga thought for a second, before responding. "I am doomed to be a servant of the main house forever."
"Oh," said Naruto. "Is that really preferable to being a weak ninja?"
The Hyuga descended even deeper into thought. Naruto shrugged "my name is Naruto. See you around!"
"Wait"
"Hmm?"
"My name is Neji."
"Hey, Neji-sama, how do you turn on your Byakugan?" Naruto usually didn't bother with honorifics, but Neji seemed to like it when people were respectful to him. Which was, to Naruto, understandable, considering how he was raised.
"Oh, there's a series of handseals to activate it, although with enough practice, you can do it without handseals," said Neji.
"Really?" asked Naruto. "What are they?"
"Here, let me show you," said Neji, as he showed Naruto the handsigns.
Before Naruto could do the handsigns, the rabbit on his head flashed through them.
"Woah! I can see everything! Bwahaha-" the rabbit ran out of chakra and collapsed.
Naruto blinked as the rabbit fell off his head. Naruto caught the rabbit, as it reverse summoned itself.
"Naruto… why does that rabbit have the Byakugan?"
"Eh, my summons do all sorts of troublesome things."
Neji looked like he wanted to say something, before he sighed, closed his mouth, opened it again and said "for someone who claims to hate bothersome things, you sure are pretty bothersome."
Naruto nodded. "I was actually planning on making myself less bothersome, but then your wise teachings of fate sunk in, and I decided not to try."
Neji opened and closed his mouth again. "Naruto, enough talking. Let us review the three core principles of my teachings of fate."
Normally, Naruto wouldn't bother to learn Neji's ideology. However, for all Naruto's laziness, he still needed some amusement in his life, and he found that few things were more amusing than spreading Neji's teachings about fate. "Yes, Neji-sensei-sama."
Neji raised his eyebrows.
Naruto realized, at some point, that he could mold the younger rabbits to be less lazy about ninja training than the older rabbits. And also less lazy in general. Neji ended up teaching the rabbits, and by extension, Naruto, the Gentile Fist. It turned out that, not only did rabbits have scrolls on gentile fist techniques, they were also more adept at using it than Neji and Naruto. In a strange twist of fate, Neji turned out to be the least adept at the gentile fist. Thus leading to Naruto rolling on the ground, laughing, as a rabbit the size of his palm kicked the sherbet ice cream out of Neji.
"Alright," said another rabbit, who's name Naruto didn't bother to remember, "to access the Kyuubi, try to meditate while leaning against that tree over there."
The tree in question was an ordinary looking maple tree, which, while a bit on the small side, was the only tree in the vast plains that made up the rabbit summons' land.
"Wait," said Naruto. "Why would I ever want to meet the Kyuubi?"
"To keep an eye on the seal, in case it breaks while you're eating lunch or something."
Naruto decided that there were few things more bothersome than an enormous demon lord bursting out of his stomach while he was eating his lunch. "Fine, I'll do it."
Naruto blinked, and appeared in front of an enormous cage. "That was easy. I was expecting this to be more bothersome."
An enormous fox demon glowered down at him as the area was flooded with so much killing intent that Naruto crumpled to the ground. As the fox fired some strange chakra projectile against the cage, Naruto decided that he jinxed himself. How bothersome.
The fox, meanwhile, twitched around rapidly, before the image of a sharingan appeared and then disappeared from it's eyes. The fox then collapsed.
Naruto stared at the demon, before picking himself off the ground. "I wouldn't normally ask this, but are you okay?"
The demon looked at Naruto. "What happened. Where's my yin half?"
Naruto stared at the Kyuubi. "What do you mean by 'yin half?'"
The Kyuubi looked Naruto in the eyes. "I was sitting in my seal, before someone suddenly ripped me out of it and stared at me using a pair of sharingan. The next thing I know, I wake up in a different seal, staring at a blonde boy, and missing all of my yin natured chakra."
Naruto stared at the Kyuubi. "You attacked the village twelve years ago, after which the hokage killed you and died."
Naruto and the Kyuubi stared at each other, both equally confused.
The Kyuubi was talking to one of the rabbits that Naruto had pulled into his mindscape. Apparently, Naruto could transport things in and out of the seal. The seal was now used mostly to store his clothes, and academy work.
Anyway, back to the conversation between the giant ancient demon lord, and the oversized rabbit.
"I'm quite surprised," said the Kyuubi. "I assumed that being entirely composed of yang chakra would drive me into a mindless rage."
The rabbit nodded. "That it probably would. However, Naruto's body is currently in contact with the sacred rabbit tree."
"The sacred rabbit tree?" asked the Kyuubi.
"Oh, yeah. The sacred rabbit tree is what remains of the body of the shinju. The shinju was the source of several bloodlines, all of which could calm a biju."
The Kyuubi nodded. "The mokuton, sharingan, rinnegan, and chakra chains, right?"
The rabbit coughed. "Actually, the byakugan can also calm the Biju."
Naruto and the Kyuubi both looked at the rabbit. Naruto spoke first. "Then why didn't the Hyuga stop you while you were rampaging?"
The Kyuubi nodded its assent. "In all my years, a byakugan has never been used on me like that."
The rabbit shook its head. "The byakugan does so much more than just see chakra pathways. The byakugan greats ridiculous control over one's chakra, as well as the most powerful sensory technique in the world."
"Really?" asked Naruto. "I've never heard about any of that."
The rabbit shrugged. "You probably have. Seeing in every technique at once is actually the result of a powerful sensory technique."
"As fascinating as this is," said the Kyuubi, "I don't get how any of this lets the Byakugan control the Biju."
"Ah, one of the most esoteric powers of the byakugan is its ability to control the chakra of others. And because the Biju are primarily composed of chakra…"
The Kyuubi looked appropriately horrified.
"Where can I learn how to do all these cool things?" asked Naruto.
"The appropriate books are in the library."
Everyone in Konoha felt a shiver run through their collective spine.
Omake: Naruto meets Tenten
Tenten gasped as she saw Neji walking beside a blonde boy a year younger than her. Neji made a friend! An actual friend!
"Neji, who's this friend of yours?"
The blonde boy looked at her for a second. "Neji, is this one of your weak teammates? She is fated to be weak. Do you willingly associate with such… peasants?"
Tenten stared at the blonde in such intense disappointment that said blonde began to look quite uncomfortable.
She sighed. "I honestly don't know what I was expecting."