Sam sat alone in the Impala feeling dejected but not resentful. It was okay that Dean and Castiel were probably having it out over Dean's sexuality just ten feet and a stucco wall away from him. It was more than okay. It was fucking hilarious, and despite feeling left out, Sam had to appreciate the situation. He just hoped that Dean wasn't going to get in trouble for Castiel's misreading of his character. Even if Dean was gay, could he really be in trouble with God for it? I mean...not that Dean was. He definitely was not gay. But speaking hypothetically; If God was the one who ordered Dean out of Hell, would it make sense for him to order him back in on such a technicality? Such a triviality? Sam didn't think so. Anyhow. Dean was not gay. And that was that. And it really didn't matter, because Sam had just gotten to a whole new level of Super Pop he'd never been able to get to before.
"Dean. I haven't presented you with all the details quite yet." Castiel calmly informed him.
"Oh, you mean there's some sort of catch? You're not going to accidentally melt any parts of me off , are you? Because that makes me nervous."
"No, Dean. I'm not quite at liberty to give you what you need just yet. As of now, anything beyond your friendly 'pat on the back' affection would be considered a sin against God, and I would be cast out of Heaven for it."
Dean scratched behind his neck and studied Castiel's face. "I'm not sure I know what you're getting at, but I do want to make it perfectly clear that this will not be a casual thing." He averted his eyes upon finishing the sentence. "I'm not...gonna let something like this be, you know...cheap."
"No, of course not. But you don't understand."
"No, I get it. What? He wants me to pray for you? That way you're off the hook? I don't mind that. I mean...I do; it goes against everything I've ever not believed. But I'll do it because...well...I can't exactly deny The Man's existence anymore, can I?"
"You're absolutely right, Dean." Castiel looked some sort of equivalent to pleased, and when Dean finally made eye contact again, he was pleased as well.
"Another thing, though. If this is going to be a big divine gay experience no matter what I do, I want us to get to know each other a little better first. And not in the biblical sense."
"I know everything about you, already." Castiel tilted his head. "I've watched you your whole life."
"Great. So that makes you the biggest cradle-robber in the history of the universe." Dean snorted. "But that's beside the point. You may know my entire life story, but you don't understand any of it."
"God has given me all the understanding I'll ever need."
"But he didn't make you human, Cass." Wow. It felt good to directly address an angel by name. Or...nickname, anyhow. "You know what I've been through, but you can't relate. And at first I was grateful for that, because it made you easier to deal with. You weren't the Touched By an Angel type who'd rub my back and hold the Kleenex on my nose for me. But if you're going to be...with me, you better learn to identify with SOMETHING."
"I have emotions, Dean. They just aren't translated through this body as readably as they are when I'm among my own race and in my own form. The only reason I can read yours is because I've had the time to study them."
"Alright. Whatever. You know what? I say we nuke what's in those doggy bags and finish our lunches."
Castiel's stomach growled and his eyes dropped to his belly, where his eyebrows furrowed, twisting his face into that ordinarily annoying stare of curiosity that only made Dean get the warm and fuzzies in his own tummy, now. This was pretty bile-inducing. But if Dean were actually to throw up, it'd probably be pink with little rubber duckies floating in it.
AN: Okay. That was short. 686 words short. Damn. oo But it doesn't matter because that's the second update in one day. Go me. Anyhow, I decided not be like Kripke and get tomatoed for not including Sam in a chapter. So he has a teeny tiny segment here. And no offense to anyone if I made him seem too dumb. It wasn't really intentional, I was actually just spontaneously brainstorming as I typed all this, so the development of whatever little bit of plot there is came as my fingers flew. And if Sam's coming across as dumb to anyone, it's really just me shining through. Sam's piece, I wrote in the middle of writing Dean and Castiel's and it was actually me taking a break from them and sorting out my ideas behind whether or not the homosexuality being wrong factor should even be brought into the equation. So I did this via typing a little piece for Sam. Not sure why anyone would ever be curious as to my writing methods seeing as how I'm far from being a mature writer, but if you managed to read through all this, Mazel Tov. 3 (Oh. And I confess. I have never eaten at Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles in my life. I've never even been near California. I'm just obsessed with the unlikely, yet delicious combination of breakfast and dinner.)