Checkmate

Chapter Three

'Victory'

"What's wrong, Battler? Your face looks very pale."

"I didn't realise you cared so much, Beato," said Battler, leaning back in his chair. He smirked, and spread his arms wide. "Has my undeniable charm finally gotten to you?"

"Huhhh?" Beatrice returned Battler's smirk with a rather devastating one of her own. It was really was strange, Battler mused, that somebody as beautiful as her went to such great lengths to ruin that beauty with those psychopathic expressions- but, then again, that description did fit the personality behind Beatrice's deceptively pretty face very well. "Who said anything about 'caring'? I don't want you to collapse on me, that's all. Heheh~" She laughed. "Natural deaths are so boring! I wouldn't want that to happen to Battler! I've got something much more spectacular for his demise planned! Ihihihi!~"

"I'll try not to bore you, then.," Battler replied, folding his arms. "Not that I ever could."

"Mn. Well, take care you don't, or I might have to throw you away~" said Beatrice haughtily. She sounded like a spoilt princess. "I've thrown away chew toys that don't hold my interest before! For your own sake, I'd advise you start putting up a better fight! Ihihi!"

And yet, even though she was cute enough to a be a fairytale princess, and selfish enough to be a real, historical one, she still laughed like an escaped mental convict.

There was quite the clash there. Ronove was right; her laugh really did lack elegance.

Then again, Beatrice liked being confusing- although, didn't that statement really hold true for all women? Even Maria had picked up on that 'all women = indecipherable' rule, what with her personality constantly flipping between sweet and nice to Jack the Ripper at any given second.

I'm sure that's more to do with faultywiring in her brain, or Rosa's parenting methods, than any inherent female desire to be complicated, though.

"Oh, I'll definitely put up a fight," Battler retorted, leaning forward, grinning. "When have I ever given up?"

"Would you like me to run through the list alphabetically or in chronological order?~ Aha, I think the best time was when you submitted to me completely and I could drag you around on that chain- it was so much fun breaking your will! Ihihihi!"

"...You're into some really weird stuff, you know that."

Beatrice shrugged. "Living for centuries gets boring unless you develop a wide range of interests."

"No wonder you people are all so insane. Remind me never to end up like any of you. In fact, what you just said only makes me want to try and defeat you more! So, Beato!" That easy smile came back to Battler's lips, as he stabbed a finger in Beatrice's direction. "Let's start this game!"

Although it's perhaps not the same 'game' you have in mind, ihihi. But it certainly won't be boring- I promise you that, Beato.

"I like your spirit, Battler," said Beatrice, folding her arms. "It will fun to break you down again! I'll have you kissing my feet like a good subject in no time, with your nose in the dirt where you belong!~"

"Ha. You're such a romantic, Beato."

"Well, I try~"

"Before we start, summon Ronove. I'm thirsty."

But not for tea. There was nothing particularly special about the tea in the metaworld, anyway. Tea, Battler had begun to realise, was pretty much universal; no matter where you drank it, be it with your relatives or with a witch who wanted to murder you, play around with your corpse, bring it back to life and then cut it to ribbons with a pair of scissors, it tasted pretty much the same. Not even magic could change that, it seemed.

"Sure. Ronove wouldn't want to miss this game, either."

"I'm sure he wouldn't."

It's pretty difficult playing a 'game' when your main opponent isn't there. Sorry, Beato, but you're not my enemy in this one. You can just stand in the background and look pretty. Or, if that's beyond you, just pull some weird faces like usual, and that'll be fine.

"Hey, Ronove. Get over here," said Beatrice, snapping her fingers.

In less than 0.2 seconds a cloud of butterflies exploded in the room, fading away to reveal that damn butler with a sycophantic smile on his face. Battler inwardly cringed; outwardly, however, he remained composed.

"Yes, Milady?" Ronove asked, bowing to Beatrice slightly.

"Go pour the princess over there some tea," said Beatrice, waving her hand in Battler's direction. "He says he can't start playing the game unless he has something to drink. Tch. Taking advantage of my hospitality, when he claims over and over again I don't exist, is just a little bit rude, don't you think?"

"Indeed," Ronove agreed, as he walked over to Battler and procured the teapot from another shower of butterflies.

Urgh. Battler was getting pretty sick of those fucking butterflies. Did they serve any purpose at all, other than show? Or maybe there was some strict rule you couldn't teleport objects without copious amounts of oddly-colored creatures, and that was where scientists had been going wrong for so long?

"Battler is a teenager boy, though; it's only to be expected that he acts in such a way," Ronove continued, now taking a teacup from mid-air, which had also formed from yet another shower of those fucking butterflies.

Gold. That was enough color Battler couldn't stand.

Couldn't the butterflies have been silver? Try some variation?

Alright, stop it, Battler. You can't set right all the wrongs of this world in one go.

"Man, the youth of today really make me feel sick," Beatrice cackled. "They need to know how lowly they are compared to witches like me- all of them! They all need to be punished! Ihihihi!~"

She sounds like an old woman. Although, I suppose, she is- didn't she say she was thousands of years old? You'd never have thought it. I wonder what her secret is. And don't say 'magic'.

"Oh, because you're so very polite yourself," Battler retorted, his eyes rolling like balls on a bagatelle board. He took his teacup from Ronove in a rather violent movement, not bothering to thank him; the grin on Ronove's lips (the lips he had used to kiss him just an hour or so ago... euch...) was making him want to pour the boiling hot liquid over his head- see what he'd do if Battler messed up his perfect, silky-smooth hair.

But that wasn't part of Battler's plan; he shook his head slightly, trying to drive the scowl off his face. He had to remain pleasant. Friendly.

This was going to be a surprise attack.

"Of course I'm polite," said Beatrice, grinning. "Far more polite than my position warrants me to be. As a Golden Witch I don't need to entertain company such as yours; you're below me, Ushiromiya Battler. Be thankful I can even stand to look at you. Ihihihi~ Be more respectful when you address me and my furniture."

"Respectful, is it?" Battler asked, staring down into the contents of his teacup. Then, he looked up, a dangerous smile on his face. "Fine then. I'll be respectful."

"Goood~" Beatrice all but purred.

"Ronove," said Battler, turning to address the butler. "I notice you're always offering me tea, but you never drink any yourself. Is there any reason for that?"

"It's a butler's duty to provide services for other people, not indulgence in themselves," said Beatrice. "Ronove is a good butler~ He knows what his duties are. He's far more cooperative than you, Battler; you could learn a lesson from him."

Battler winced slightly at this suggestion. What 'lesson' did Beatrice suggest he learn from that creepy butler? There were many things Battler could think of, but none of them were particularly... 'child-friendly', and was enough to make him flush slightly. He wondered if Beatrice was talking like that on purpose.

Judging by that twisted smirk, which would've been more fitting on a Halloween pumpkin than Beatrice's face, that was exactly what she was doing.

Oh well. I'll have the last laugh. You just wait, Beato. And you too, Ronove. You laugh whilst you still have the full usage of your mouth.

Battler took a sip of his tea, trying to hide his blushing face. When he put the cup down, he'd managed to force his expression into a more neutral, apathetic one.

"It tastes pretty good, though. It seems a shame that it should be wasted on a person who's so very 'below you', right, Beato?"

"Ah, yes. That's true," Beatrice nodded. "When you die, I fully intend to cut open your stomach and take back all the food you've been eating on my hospitality, ihihihi~"

"Then, if that's the case, I should do the 'polite' and 'respectful' thing and start sharing, right?"

And, with a laugh that echoed Beatrice's perfectly, he took another mouthful of tea (which wasn't actually that good); got to his feet and placed his hands at either side of Ronove's head.

"Battler?" Ronove asked.

Battler smiled, and leant forwards, whispering softly in Ronove's ear; "Haha, let's see who wins this time."

"Battl-"

But Ronove never finished his question.

Battler slammed his lips down onto Ronove's in a rather violent kiss.

Battler didn't see Beatrice's reaction, but he could take a wild guess at it.

Smirking, Battler bit down on Ronove's lower lip, making him gasp in pain and surprise. Taking advantage of this, Battler slipped his tongue in Ronove's mouth, which only elicited another moan.

Oh yeah. Who's in control now? You should know your place- I won't be defeated by the likes of you so easily!

...Why am I quoting Beatrice?

My own head is beginning to scare me.

Ronove's fingers wrapped round Battler's arms, and Battler wondered whether he was going to push him away. That would have been 'right' and 'proper'. But Battler didn't care about any of that. In retaliation Battler wrapped his own arms round Ronove's back, pulling him into an embrace, pressing his body against the other until it was almost impossible to be any closer. The concept of 'personal space' had now ceased to exist.

I'm not going to lose now. No way.

Battler's move was rewarded with another breathy moan, as Ronove's fingers trailed up Battler's arms, resting in his hair, and actually that felt rather nice, and it now Ronove was kissing back properly, and it was Battler who was making soft, breathy moans and trying to press against Ronove even more, even though it was impossible.

His knees felt weak; it was difficult to stand; his brain had been turned to liquid and he must have been insane, because that was the only explanation for this.

But Battler didn't much care about his sanity.

It didn't matter.

All that mattered was trying to force as many 'interesting' sounds of Ronove as possible; his mouth was warm, and Battler could taste that sub-par tea, which, when being eaten out of Ronove's tongue, tasted a lot better.

If he couldn't win at chess, then at least he could try and win and this- whatever 'this' was.

So you really want to be a better than Ronove at sexual assault? How do you go from chess to sexual assault, anyway? I don't think they're that closely linked, or people wouldn't consider chess such a 'geeky', 'boring' game.

Oh well. If I'm mad, then I might as well enjoy this. I've got nothing to lose.

"W-what's going on?"

Beatrice's half-surprised, half-angry shout was enough to bring Battler back to his senses. The haze of lust in his brain dissipated, like fog dispersed by the morning sun. He felt Ronove's head jerk backwards, as though he had only just remembered where they were, too; now, that was incredibly clumsy of him.

Battler noticed the butler's face was slightly flushed, and his hair was messier than usual, and his lips looked just a tad swollen.

Fuck. He looks kind of hot...

Ronove opened his mouth a few times, but no sound came out. He wasn't even smiling; he looked confused, and his eyes were too wide, and his pupils were almost non-existent. Now, that was comforting; Battler had actually managed to render the damned butler speechless.

"What was that?" Beatrice asked in a liquid nitrogen, sub-zero voice. The surprise on her face was beginning to wane; now, instead, she looked pissed off. "If you don't give me an answer in less than five seconds I'll show you I can use magic to stuff candy in places more sensitive than the stomach! Get talking!"

Oh yes, she was definitely pissed off.

"Ah, Beato, I was just doing what you said," said Battler. His face was the picture of wide-eyed innocence, despite his rumpled clothes and hair.

"What? I said no such thing! That wasn't the sort of 'game' I had in mind."

"But you did tell me to be more respectful of my elders; and, well, I was just returning the favor. Ronove did the same thing to me a few hours ago, and I thought it would be terribly rude if I didn't do something for him in return," said Battler, leering.

Beatrice blinked several times in succession, like a doll. Then, she turned to fix Ronove with an awful, awful look. It was enough to make Battler wince, and it wasn't even being directed at him.

"Ronove! What is the meaning of this?"

"He can explain it to you," said Battler, offering Ronove a small smile and a wink. "Have fun with Beato. I'd like to hang around and watch, but I value my life more than that, ihihihi. Ciao."

And, in a cloud of golden butterflies, Battler vanished.

a.n: o/o
this fandom. dese characters.
why are they so much fun to write? XDD

i think the next chapter will the last one. or maybe there will be 2 more chapters, but IDEK.
thank you to the people that read/review/fave/alert this weird... thing... XD

~renahhchen xoxoxo