Part 1: South Africa 3

Once again, Safari Joe got up and had his breakfast, ready for another day of hunting. He greeted Mule and the tracker and guide, and asked what was next in the South African hunt.

"Oh, yes," said the guide, "The first part of today's hunt is quite exciting. The tracker will be going along with you on this one, Safari Joe, because this is herd hunting."

"Herd hunting?" said Safari Joe, "Ha, ha, ha! Sounds perfect to me! I've been waiting for an opportunity to sit in the back seat of a moving jeep and shoot at the herds as they pass me by! So, which herd animal are we going to be hunting?"

"We'll be hunting Black wildebeest, man," said the guide.

"Wildebeest, eh?" Safari Joe said. "That's excellent! A hunter can learn a thing or two from hunting those stubborn creatures."

He returned to the holojector and asked Mule, "All right then, Mule, what's there to see about the wildebeest?"

Mule brought up a picture of said animal, and he started to explain it.

"The Black wildebeest is a dark-furred quadruped that frequents the plains of Africa. It is known to migrate all over the southern half of the continent, from here in South Africa all the way to the Serengeti in Tanzania. They are most active during the morning and late afternoon, and can run at speeds of up to 50 mph, or 80 km/h. One must not approach a wildebeest too knowingly or too closely, because they snort and run a short distance to get away from any human outdoors. That is why they must be approached in a moving four-wheeled vehicle when hunting or photographing them. Recommended ammo for hunting wildebeest is .300."

"Good!" said Safari Joe, ever laughing, "I love a challenge!"

"Let's go now, Safari Joe!" said the tracker, "Those wildebeest will not be a-waiting for us, you know."

"I'm coming, don't rush me!" said Joe as he jogged toward the hunting jeep.

They drove out into the countryside. Evidently, the tracker really knew what he was doing, Safari Joe noted, because it didn't take too long for them to find the herd of wildebeest, trampling through the plains of South Africa.

"All right, Joe," said the tracker, "The idea is to shoot at least five of them. If you get all five of them easily, you are free to shoot a few extra, but do not do overkill. We do not want the Black wildebeest to become an endangered species."

"Got it!" said Safari Joe, too excited to worry much about the moral code of being a hunter at the time.

They waited for the herd to get a little closer as they continued driving, and then Safari Joe took aim. As usual, his aim was perfect. One wildebeest went down. Then another one went down. Safari Joe laughed as each one fell to the ground. A third one was bagged by a very precise shot. Then Safari Joe shot one that was a more difficult target from his position on the jeep. It hit, not quite as accurately as the others, but it still killed the target. Finally, he stood up in his seat in the jeep and fired one at one of the wildebeest bold enough to get near the jeep, right between the eyes.

"That's five! Safari Joe does it again!" he proclaimed. Then he suddenly lost it for a moment and started to shoot down a few more wildebeest. He laughed almost maniacally as he took them down. When he got as far as number ten, the tracker suddenly stopped the jeep and shouted at Safari Joe, "Are you nuts, man? I said you shouldn't do overkill with this hunt! Five wildebeest was the goal. You almost did a dishonorable thing back there, man, by killing multiple extras."

Safari Joe had been prepared to retort, but now he just lowered his head and said, "Yeah, you're right, mate. As a sportsman, I should know better than to get overexcited with my skills as a big game hunter. I won't let it happen again."

"See that you don't let it happen again," said the guide back at the camp, "Because this is the second penalty you've earned in your South African hunting. I admire you as an elite game hunter, Safari Joe, but if you earn one more penalty before the hunt in South Africa is completed, you will be disqualified, and another hunter will take over the role of the best big game hunter in the galaxy."

"Yes, all right," said Safari Joe, "I promise I won't let it happen again at all."

The guide looked at him, as if searching for sincerity. Mule came over and said to the guide, "Do not worry about my boss, sir. Safari Joe gave his word as a sportsman. I know that he will honor it, even if it's only to hold onto his status as the best big game hunter."

"All right, then," the guide said, "I'll give Joe one more chance. There is another kind of beast on the hunting schedule today. It's called the Warthog."

Safari Joe's anticipation came back to life. "Warthogs, huh? Well they're a decent challenge, too, I reckon. After all, they're as aggressive as any wild hog, if I'm not mistaken. Mule! Show me if I'm right!"

Again the holojector was turned on. It showed the small but bad-tempered animal on its screen.

"The Warthog, or Common warthog, is a wild member of the pig family found in grassland, savannah, and woodland in sub-Saharan Africa. The so-called 'warts' on its head are actually protrusions, which serve as a fat reserve and a defensive weapon when males fight. Its two pairs of tusks are also used as formidable weapons. Despite its aggressive nature, Warthogs are peaceful animals by preference, although they will eat insects, eggs, and at times, carrion, in addition to various vegetation. Recommended ammo for hunting Warthogs is .270, sir."

"Hmm, these swine are certainly more dangerous than the average domestic pig," remarked Safari Joe, "Any recommendations for taking them out, Mule?"

"If you can find a concealed, high point in the area where the Warthogs graze, you can sniper them, sir," said Mule. "And the tracker told me that you have to bring back two of them."

"Good," said Joe, again, "Another interesting challenge ahead!"

The tracker said to Safari Joe at the beginning of the hunt, "We have tracked several animals, including your Warthogs, in an area southeast of here, where there is lots of grass and bushes, but few trees, and only a little water. Good luck, sir!"

"Believe me," said Safari Joe, "As much as I appreciate the offer, Safari Joe makes his own luck."

Safari Joe ran for a while to the southeast, always making sure he didn't deviate from his intended course. The heat never failed in most parts of Africa, but Safari Joe had adapted to it well, and with food and water plentiful anyway, there was no danger of him passing out from sunstroke or heat exhaustion during the hunt.

As he got closer to the targets, he slowed down, walking more quietly. Then, as he had hoped after hearing Mule's advice, he saw a rise of the ground. He decided to climb it and see if any Warthogs could be seen from this vantage point. When he reached the top, there indeed was an area not far below where a few Warthogs were wandering around. They were grazing, as would be expected of them, and they looked like they had just gotten a fresh drink of water.

"Hmm," said Safari Joe, "It should be easy to snipe the first one, as long as I'm quiet and sneaky. The problem is, they all might run away after I shoot the first. I suppose I'll have to be fast with my second shot if I'm going to kill two of those ugly things!"

He went behind some bushes that hid him effectively, but still allowed him to fire at the Warthogs. He took aim at one that was a ways away from him, and fired.

The Warthog sank to the ground and died.

"One!" Safari Joe whisper-hissed. As he predicted, the others panicked and began to run. But one stayed behind and began running about the area, as if looking for the gunman so he could avenge his comrade.

"Bad choice, pig!" said Safari Joe, and he aimed again. The click of his Gatling gun alerted the Warthog, though, and the beast started to charge his hiding place. Joe aimed in a hurry, and fired, and the second Warthog fell dead.

"Two!" he said more loudly. "Ha! Safari Joe does it AGAIN!"

"Congratulations again, Safari Joe," said his guide.

"There's just one more animal for you to hunt tomorrow," said the tracker. "He's going to be the big prize in your South African hunt, the official Trophy hunt. If you can successfully stalk and kill it without making one more penalty for yourself, you will have fulfilled your role as the greatest hunter in South Africa."

"Excellent!" said Safari Joe, "The first challenge I can sink my teeth into! What, exactly, will I be hunting?"

"Patience, man," said the guide. "You will be told all about it tomorrow. In the meantime, go back to the bungalow and have some drinks and swap stories with the other hunters again."

Safari Joe looked a little disappointed that he had to wait one more night before he'd find out what his ultimate South African hunt was, but he saw the wisdom in waiting for good things, and submitted to his guide's wishes.

"Hey, Mule!" he said on his way to the bungalow, "Maybe this time, you can join in on the fun in the bungalow!"

"Oh, I suppose so, sir," said Mule, "Although I am not the same kind of conversationalist you are, I must admit."

"Don't worry about that," said Joe, "You can simply confirm the prey specifications you always give me before every hunt. And then I can drink you under the table."

"I cannot drink either, sir," said Mule, "I am a robot, remember?"

"Oh, Mule," said Safari Joe, "It's only cherryade and lemonade!"