I still don't understand the Birth by Sleep timeline, so if I made any errors about Kingdom Hearts and the fact Vexen does/doesn't know how to make it, I'm sorry.

III. It's Like Building A Snowman

The thing about Vexen was that he was never in the Grey Room. There were days I would the same two members chill on the sofa and chat, the vibrant redhead leaning against the glass and shouting irrelevant things to Saix. But I had yet to see Vexen…anywhere that wasn't in the Round Room. The only reason I remembered his name was because he gave me a look upon arrival. A look of warped curiosity.

It had been a week since my first mission, and I was relieved that Saix hadn't given me anything in the meantime.

It was still difficult to settle in, taking more interest in playing the sitar in my room or sitting on a desolate sofa doing just that again. Sometimes it wasn't real playing, just letting its weight take me away and encourage me not to look at anyone.

If you're going to keep going like this, then there's no reason why you signed up.

I was already aware of that fact, but the phrase 'Kingdom Hearts' caught my attention. It was their grand plan, and their ultimate goal. That was what Xigbar said anyway on the day he gave the proposal. "We're all like you. We simply exist, even if we're not meant to." Or something like that.

And then after that first day, he left you just like that.

It was something that was meant to happen. No one knows about you, but they still know something's up.

I guess I should have predicted that the scientist of the group would approach me first.

"Don't mind me," he said as I made to get up. I wasn't used to having someone sit next to me, even more so the one who was never here. "I couldn't concentrate over there."

I gave a small nod, gingerly sitting back down and rearranging my sitar on my lap. Even though the other sofa was free, why did he choose to sit next to me? Was there something he wanted from me?

You can't trust him.

I guess after two weeks, he wouldn't realise that I hadn't gotten to know anyone at all. Perhaps he had made the assumption that I would be interesting, a good person to get on with.

We sat there in silence for ages, him flicking through neatly stapled paperwork and occasionally sipping his strong coffee and me drumming the sitar as quietly as I could. In contrast, there was laughter and happiness on the other side of the room, although I couldn't make out anything concrete.

I accidently stole a look at what Vexen was reading and constantly furrowing his eyebrows over, and that was probably my downfall. "How can you read all that? I can't read half of the things on there, let alone what they mean."

Vexen let out an irritated sigh through his nose, flashing a dangerous look. "I can understand this because I wrote it. And only someone like me would make sense of it because it's my work, and no one else has the motivation nor intellect to have an inkling of the foundations. Now, once you've finished ogling, I want to read this in peace. It's best if you give up trying to understand since it's not in your capabilities."

I tried to think of something in common. "What about Kingdom Hearts? What exactly is it?"

"It's the key to getting our hearts back. But we're still researching about how to do that. Or more accurately, that's what I'm doing and Zexion is assisting on."

"So if we can't find Kingdom Hearts, we can't get our hearts back?"

Vexen took another swing of his coffee, exasperated. "Not find, make. If we can somehow eliminate Heartless and gather the hearts, then it is possible. The problem is how to contain the hearts. When we kill Heartless, the hearts are left to wander and form more Heartless."

"It's like building a snowman."

"I'm sorry?" he asked a little too quickly.

"Gathering snow to make something spectacular, but do it too slow, it all crumples to the floor. Valuable time and effort is wasted. Is that what we're doing at the moment?"

"As I said, I'm still researching on it. Science is based on hypotheses and trials – if there is a way to contain the hearts, then it will surely be discovered." Vexen looked back at his valuable work, and I took that as a hint he didn't want to be bothered anymore.

If Kingdom Hearts was a snowman, there was a certain time limit to how long it would take to melt. Hopes of having a heart were short-lived at best.

I think my encounter with Vexen this morning had stirred a lot of interest amongst the other members. For when I returned from my trip to the lavatory, Xigbar beckoned me over to his side of the room rather than back to Vexen, which was where I was planning to sit again. I wasn't used to people approaching me, so it was only when he came over to me that I realised he wanted my attention.

"New boy, would you mind if I gave you a bit of advice?"

I was taken aback, lost for words. What was he expecting me to say?

He didn't wait for me to say anything, rubbing the back of his neck. "If you keep isolating yourself like this, the only people you'll attract is people like Vexen. When I recruited you back in that alley, you weren't like this. Is something up?"

I shook my head vigorously. "Of course not!" I blurted out, wildly shaking my arms in front of me. "It's just I had the history of being a nuisance, and things go more smoothly when I'm by myself."

Xigbar laughed at my comment, and I felt myself draw in a large breath in anxiety. "Nuisance I have to agree with. Come on, you can't hide in your shell all day."

I wanted to know what he meant, but he just turned on his heel and made his way back to the other cloaked people. I was about to sit next to Vexen again, but Xigbar caught my eye, faster this time. "Don't make me get you."

He wants you to follow him.

"Oh," I stammered, stumbling across the room to where there were clearly more people. There was the redhead and someone perhaps a little younger than me with his nose in a book, squashed on the same sofa as the one who stared me down. If Vexen got irritated enough to sit with me, how this boy could read in peace was inspirational.

"That's Xaldin, Zexion and Axel," he introduced as he pointed them out. "Pick whichever seat you want, and we'll talk."

I chose the one furthest away from the one called Xaldin, making sure not to look into those eyes. Now he had his hood down, those dreadlocks and large sideburns made him more menacing. Much to my dismay, Xigbar chose to sit on the same sofa as me.

"So then, it's rude not to introduce yourself." He cracked a grin, and regardless of his eyepatch and long scar beneath one eye, it was friendly.

"Um, I'm Demyx."

The redhead named Axel draped an arm over the back of the settee. "Is this really necessary?"

"Yes," Xigbar replied sternly. "Honestly, if he were me, I would have already died of boredom. Social interactions are pretty important, especially if we're called for doubles missions. No point going outside here and not knowing what to expect of your partner."

I binked. "What are doubles missions?" I asked Xigbar.

"Exactly that. It's not like every mission will pan out nicely for one person, so doubles missions are where more than one person is sent out at a time. Of course, with you effectively being a trainee, you'll have multiple mentors to help you with missions involving combat for a while."

"Speaking of which, what can you summon? We all already heard you have power over water, but what's your weapon?" Axel asked. I think even Zexion's head lifted when he asked.

I thought that they would realise by now, the number of times I had entered here. "A sitar."

There was a mild silence, three staring at me and the other returning to his book. Something was up. Was having a sitar really that bad? The Xaldin burst into peals of laughter, quiet at first then louder.

"A sitar? And I thought Zexion had a bad one!"

The boy barely looked up, his visible eye lifting minutely. Then he flung his book at Xaldin's head with a small jerk of his wrist, where the book landed back into his hand on the exact page he had left it.

I was surprised about the assault, inwardly wondering why Xaldin hadn't done anything to avoid it. "W-what about everyone else then?" I asked as an attempt to divert the attention from me and my apparently hilarious weapon.

Axel was too busy grinning from ear to ear to hear me, so it was once again Xigbar who replied. "I can use arrowguns, Xaldin uses six lances – he uses the wind to keep control of all of them – Zexion, as you witnessed, can summon a book and Axel uses chakrams. A sitar's not bad, don't take Xaldin's comment to heart."

I smiled. I valued music more than anything, and if Xaldin wanted to laugh at it, it only showed that he had no interest in it. There was never a moment I thought we would get on anyway – that's the general aura I had. People never came to me, only the doctors and medical help. If I ever had the chance to meet others, they would turn tail if I said I was schizophrenic.

If these people never knew, maybe I could have a chance. Valitus was there to help – he never terrified me at night the way it was like before, he offered me the courage I would never have mustered. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have signed up. I was happy to be here, even if I was only just settling in.