First of all, I just want to say thank you for all the lovely reviews! They really mean a lot to me! I have an exam tomorrow (wish me luck!) but after that I'm free for the next of the week. I hope you enjoy this chapter; it is a bit longer than usual.
For a long time Gwen clutched on to Jack for support, but slowly her grip loosened and her sobs died down. When at last she had run dry she pulled away slowly, wiping her face with the back of her hands, ignoring Jack's growl when she touched her bruise and winced. Shyly Gwen glanced up at Jack, embarrassed at her sudden emotional breakdown. She noticed that Jack now had a huge patch of his shirt which was soaked with tears and smeared with mascara. "Oh, crap! Look at your shirt! I'm sorry!" Gwen croaked before clearing her throat and blushing ever so slightly. However Jack just laughed.
"Don't worry about it, Gwen," Jack soothed her, one arm still wound around her body protectively, "Come on. Let's go in to my office." Gwen nodded silently, allowing Jack to help her up and to guide her towards his office. Her legs felt weak and she had a huge headache for weeping all night. Quickly she glanced around the Hub, hoping she wouldn't need to explain things to the rest of the team, when she noticed they were alone. Gwen blinked in surprise before turning to Jack.
"Where did everyone do?" Gwen asked, craning her head around to check if the whole Hub was empty. It definitely seemed like it. When did they leave? How long was she crying in to Jack's chest? She felt Jack's body shrug from where he supported her.
"Not sure. Must have gone home." Usually jack would have been angry at his team for leaving a job unfinished, but today he understood why they had disappeared and he appreciated it. When they reached his office he guided Gwen toward the sofa before clapping his hands together. "Right!" Jack said, "Coffee? Tea? Hot chocolate?" Jack was determined to get a hot drink in to her. She felt freezing when he held her.
Gwen smiled timidly as she thought before answering quietly, "Hot chocolate?" Her mother always used to make her hot chocolate with the little marshmallows floating in the top when she had been upset or simply had a bad day at school. When she was really young, Gwen sometimes used to cry on purpose so she could get some of her mother's Heavenly hot chocolate.
Jack rushed off instantly not happy to leave Gwen by herself but wanting her to have a hot drink. When he returned, carrying two mugs in his hand, he found her with her legs tucked up to her chests, her arms wrapped around them as she lay her head back against the wall behind her with her eyes closed. For a second Jack faltered in the doorway, smiling softly as he admired the sight. Then Gwen's head shot up, as though she sensed his presence, and Jack walked towards her grinning, holding out one mug.
"Thanks," Gwen mumbled as she took the mug and drank greedily. Jack found himself watching her again as she gulped down the drink before letting a soft smile flitter across her lips, her eyes unfocused as though she was thinking about something from her past. Jack almost asked her what she was thinking about but resisted it; after all, he never told her anything about his past, even when she asked.
"What happened?" Jack asked gently, knowing the best thing for Gwen was to talk about what happened and then leave it behind her. At his question she glanced down at her knees and chewed her bottom lip, her brow furrowed as she thought. Jack let her mull over her thoughts and he turned to his desk where he put down his mug before unbuttoning his shirt and discarding it on the floor. He had just put a new shirt on, the buttons were still open, when Gwen looked up, ready to answer his question.
However she had not been prepared to see Jack's bare chest and when she opened her mouth to speak, nothing came out. Her eyes drifted from his face and on to his chest without even realizing it, and she sat like that until she heard Jack chuckle which broke the spell. Immediately she dropped her eyes to the floor and blushed, which increased when Jack asked jokingly, "Like what you see?"
Of course the answer was yes. Gwen was screaming it inside her head. In fact, ever since she met Jack, she would find herself staring at him at the most random moments and admiring him. She had known for a while now that she had fallen in love with Jack. Of course she denied it, always thinking of Rhys, but now she didn't have to think of Rhys and she wondered if jack felt the same. Sometimes she would catch him looking at her, or he would brush up against her while they worked. Should she tell him? Should she admit to her feelings?
Instead of confessing about her love for Jack, Gwen just smirked when she looked back up at him, he had now fastened his buttons which she was happy about because it meant she wouldn't lose her train of thought again, and rolled her eyes. "Meh, I've seen better," Gwen said jokingly as she shrugged her shoulders. Jack pouted before sitting next to her and putting his arm around her shoulders.
"You wound my pride," Jack joked, giving her shoulders a light squeeze. God, it felt good to be holding her. No, it was more than that. It felt right. Jack couldn't really describe how he felt when he was around Gwen but he realized that it was a lot like how he felt with Estelle; it felt a lot like love. But how could he love her? He had built up so many defences, not wanting to love someone again and watch them grow old and die without him. But here he was, knowing that he loved Gwen but too afraid to admit it, even to himself. Turning back to Gwen, he noticed how her eyes were distant as though thinking about something, and how she chewed her lip, showing her distress. "Do you want to talk about it?" Jack asked gently, squeezing her shoulders again. "I think you should. It will help. Trust me."
"I trust you, Jack," Gwen sighed before burying her face in to her hands and mumbling her story against her palms, "I came home and Rhys was still up. He... He had been drinking." She could feel the tears starting up again, but this time she absolutely refused to cry, after all it didn't do her any good, but then again, it was easier said than done. "We started arguing, we've been arguing a lot recently, and when I didn't answer him he... he shook me so I pushed him away. Then he... then..." She couldn't actually bring herself to say that Rhys had slapped her as tears suddenly started to flow again. Gwen glanced up at Jack and judging by his expression Gwen guessed that Jack understood what happened so she moved on. "I packed the first things I found and then came here."
Gwen started to sob quietly, despite her promise not to cry, and Jack silently wrapped his arms around her, pulling her body in to a hug. Instantly she responded by wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in to his shoulder. Despite the fact that she was sobbing because she had just broken up with her husband after he slapped her, Gwen felt warm, safe and basically happy in Jack's strong embrace. She felt his lips against the top of her head followed by him whispered, "I'm sorry."
Quickly Gwen sat up, her eyes wide, so she could look in to Jack's face. Gwen couldn't believe it when she saw sorrow and guilt in his features. "Why the hell are you apologizing?" Gwen asked. After all, if it was anybody's fault it was her fault; she had been the one who put the strain on the relationship which caused Rhys to snap. It was all her fault.
"Because," Jack explained, "I always told you to keep things balanced and to stay in your relationship with Rhys without realizing how unhappy you were. If it wasn't for my nagging you might have broke up with him ages ago and he wouldn't have hit you." Jack hesitantly raised his hand and gently brushed her bruised cheek before dropping it back in to his lap.
"Hey," Gwen said forcefully, raising her hand to rest it on Jack's cheek so that he looked at her, "This is not your fault. Right?" Jack chuckled lowly and nodded before falling silent. Gwen just realized that she was touching his face which was very close to her own. Jack seemed to have the same thought and the two of them just sat there and stared in to each other's eyes, both of them willing to find the courage to lean forward and kiss the other. Jack seemed to inch forward only slightly just as Gwen dropped her hand from his face and she instantly regretted it.
"So," Jack said, clearing his throat, "What are you going to do now?" Jack remembered Gwen carrying her bags in to the Hub and he wondered if she had already sorted out where she was staying. He wondered if she would stay with him if she didn't have any arrangements, and he remembered Gwen asking him if he ever got lonely at night when she first joined. He didn't answer her because the answer was yes and he didn't want to admit it.
Gwen shrugged, looking down at the floor. To be honest, she had no idea. "I guess I'll go to the nearest hotel now and then ask if I can crash on a friend's sofa." After that she had no plan. She knew that one of her friends had a spare room which she had slept in before when she had small arguments with Rhys, but how would she feel about a permanent resident? But before she had to put some serious thought in to it, Jack came to her rescue
"You could always just stay here," Jack offered, "I have a bed which I hardly use and I guess we could both use the company." Gwen looked hopefully. It would be so much easier to stay here and she constantly craved Jack's presence to sooth her. It was true that they both needed the company after the ordeal with Rhys and Jack and Ianto agreeing to stop seeing each other.
"Really?" Gwen asked, still not believing her luck. When Jack nodded with his famous grin plastered on to his face, Gwen jumped forward and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Gwen babbled, pulling back from Jack so she could look in to his face when she spoke, "That is a load of my mind." Gwen smiled soft and said sincerely, "Thank you, Jack."
"Least I can do," Jack said, rising to his feet. "The bedroom is just down there." Jack pointed to a little manhole to the side of his desk. "You head down and I'll get your bags," jack offered, already heading to the door. Gwen smiled and muttered her thanks before heading down the ladder where Jack indicated. Pausing in the doorway Jack watched her disappear before quickly going to retrieve her belongings.
Gwen's first impression of Jack's room was that it was bare. The bed had a simple and dull duvet on, and the only other furniture in the room was a mirror and two sets of drawers as well as a wardrobe. Then her eyes started growing accustomed to the light and Gwen realizing this room told her more about Jack than anything else. There was little ornaments dotted around the room, cluttered together on top of the drawers and on the few shelves. But they were different from the alien artefacts he kept in his office, these were personal. Gwen was just inspecting a photo frame which had a black and white photo of a woman underneath the glass as well as a pressed flower.
"Elizabeth." Gwen jumped at Jack's voice, not hearing him climb down the ladder. She spun around and gave him a confused look until he explained himself, stepping closer and dumping her two bags on top of the bed. "That's Elizabeth," Jack said, pointing at the photo, "She was my best friend's sister and she gave me that flower when I headed off to war. When I returned she was dead." Jack looked sadly down at the photo before quickly changing the subject, not wanting to dwell on his past. "Do you want another drink? You're freezing."
"Please," Gwen said with her arms wrapped tightly around herself in an effort to keep warm. She turned to her bags when Jack leapt up the ladder and fished out her pyjamas which consisted of shorts and a tank top. Quickly she got changed, not wanting Jack to walk in on her half naked, and silently chuckled to herself as she imagined how that would play out. God, she would be so embarrassed, but it would be worth it if she saw Jack falter in shock immediately followed by him checking her out. Wait. What was she thinking?
Gwen was glad when Jack came down the ladder because he distracted her from her own embarrassing thoughts and simply because it was Jack. He was her comfort blanket and she yearned for his reassuring touch and words. "Thanks," Gwen said taking the mug and taking a big gulp. "Jack..." Gwen began, nervously gripping the mug with both hands and not meeting his gaze. "Never mind," Gwen said quickly, turning around and sitting down on the bed.
A moment later she felt Jack sit down next to her and throw his arm over her shoulders, pulling her body in to his. "Gwen?" Jack asked, but she was still silent. She was just being stupid and Jack would probably laugh at her. "Gwen, please. What is it?" He spoke with such gentleness in his voice that Gwen looked up in to his anxious eyes. She realized then that Jack cared for her a lot, but was that it? Gwen hoped not.
"Well," Gwen said, giving in to Jack's pleading face, "I was wondering if... if you would stay with me? Please?" Jack blinked in surprise and then suddenly started to laugh warmly, causing Gwen to look up at him in hurt confusion.
"Was that it? Of course I'll stay with you," Jack said simply. He stood up, walked around to the other side of the bed and pulled back the blanket. "I would do anything for you." The sincerity of his voice and face made Gwen's heart thud dramatically before she smiled softly and whispered her thank you. She climbed in to bed next to him and jack pressed his wrist strap to switch off the lights.
"Thank you," Gwen whispered and then let out a content sigh as jack wrapped his arms around her body and pulled her in to his chest so her back was against his front. Even though it was already morning and she had just broken up with her husband after he hit her, Gwen had the best night sleep she had had in a long time.