Shireen Greyjoy has been a Greyjoy for almost a year now and she has settled with her lot in life and has actually learned to care for Theon. It is not the epic and consuming love she imaged she would have as a child but it is a step in the right direction she thinks. She thinks of him as a friend, partner, and even as someone she could see spending the rest of her life with. He has slowly made up with the rest of her patchwork family and she has slowly forgiven him for the way he behaved before Robbie was born. And it has been almost a year since she last saw Rickon Stark. In fact since that day Shireen has been avoiding all things Stark. She has slowly let her bond with Ned and Jon Snow lapse and slowly began to make inroads with Asha and Gendry and her Uncle Renly. It is not that she doesn't miss Ned and Jon but it is just too painful to look at them and not see the boy who left her drowning in the middle of a flood. A boy who did not even let her speak and who would always be a boy no matter how much she wanted him to be a man.
She has been able to avoid them but no longer can she hide behind her husband and his family. Today it is her uncle's birthday and it is being held at Winterfell and Shireen is getting ready to go with her husband, son, sister in law, and cousin to face the masses of people that she has been avoiding since giving birth to her beloved son. She also knows that Arya will be there and that people are still blaming her for ending her cousin's marriage.
But Shireen will ignore the rumors and gossip and snide talk as she has her entire life and simply be as blank and polite as she has always been. She dresses in a simple yellow sun dress, a black jean jacket, and matching boots. Her hair is pulled back and she wears some of her grandmother's peals around her neck and lobes. Her engagement ring shines in the light and Shireen thinks that she looks like someone happy; someone that is not always yearning for something more.
On the ride there Shireen simply contends herself to hold her babbling son who with his sea form green eyes and shock of black hair and pale skin is the perfect combination of her and Theon. He is constantly talking his nonsense and walking and getting into mischief. He is the light of her life and the only reason Shireen survived those first few weeks after his birth, Rickons rejection, and her wedding day.
Upon arriving at the estate Shireen exits the vehicle and soon realizes that Asha and Gendry are forming a protective bubble around her with Theon grasping her hand to try and shield her from everyone around them. But Shireen wants none of that. She will never let anyone make her feel ashamed at the choice she has made in the name of her son. So she hands Robbie to Asha, links her arms with that of her husband and soon proceeds to march through the doors and she knows that everyone can see.
She will not let these people judge her. She will not let any of them see her as anything but a might mother and strong woman. She will stand tall and mighty. She will not be weak. She will be strong. Even if it feels like her insides are dying and her heart is some brittle and weak organ that has only enough space for her family and beats only for her son.
Upon entering the gates of Winterfell where less than eighteen months ago she walked down an aisle to see Rickon waiting at the end of it Shireen enters once more and except this time all eyes are not on her. Yet she feels people staring as she and her small group work their way over to a table where she proceeds to sit with Robbie and Asha while Gendry and Theon go to fetch food. As her husband approaches and sits next to her Shireen is content to ignore him and everyone else and she tries to feed her eleven month old son who a squiggly worm who wants to run when he can barely walk more than a few feet one his own.
She doesn't know where she gets his energy from but all she knows is that Robbie takes after his namesake in more ways than one. He is full of the energy and zest for life that her uncle Robert has always possessed. Robbie laughs and loves fiercely and is full of the Baratheon fury that all of her family seems to possess except her. With her uncle comes out in a volcanic fury hot and burning. With her father it is like ice cold and stinging. With uncle Renly it is a cutting wind of words and laughter.
After they are all done eating and she has miraculously managed to keep Robbie clean for once during a meal she proceeds to go to where her Uncle stands surrounded by men his own age so that he can see that she kept her promise to come and so that she can flee back to her home where she is comfortable and where she says raising her son while Theon works. It is her fortress where she is queen and where nothing can hurt her much like these people are capable of doing.
She declines Theon's offer to come up with her and Robbie. Her uncle has never truly warmed up to her husband and to this day he refuses to refer to Shireen by her married name. so instead she will save them all some grief and she will do what is needed so she can leave quickly.
As she walks around the tables and people she ignores the looks of anger Arya is throwing her way and the desperate longing she show Gendry when she think no one if looking. She ignores the way Catelyn Stark looks at the child in her arms and she refuses to even glance at her father whose icy gaze reveals nothing. As she approaches she sees her uncle and he bellows her name. It is him she concentrates on and it is him whom she smiles at. She loves her uncle. Aside from Gendry and Robbie he is the one person whom she lives and would kill and bleed for.
As she cuts through the circle of men who include Ned Stark and Davos she goes to stand in front of her uncle who embraces her and presses a loud smacking kiss to her cheek. He then takes her child from her arms and proceeds to swing him in a circle and to then throw him up in the air.
She has never like it when her uncle does this but never has he allowed Robbie to fall and she knows he never will. So she allows him to play with her son who is squealing in joy. After her uncle stops she proceeds to talk with him and after a few minutes she knows that Robbie growing tired as his eyes begin to droop. So she takes him from her uncles arms, stands on her tip toes to kiss his cheek, and then bids him goodbye and says she will see him in a few days when he is back in the South for a visit.
With her child cradled in her arms Shireen turns to go when she collides into a solid towering mass of lean muscle. Arms go to her waist to steady her and she knows immediately who it is. Those hands on her where she can feel the heat of them even through her clothes. It feels too intimate and immediately she back up a step and looks up to see the burning gaze of Rickon Stark.
He has changed much since they last talked. The last traces of boyhood are gone from his face. He skin is still pale and even more chiselled since last they met. His eyes are still as bright as the sky unlike her own dark midnight eyes. His red hair is shorn short almost to the scalp and a five o'clock shadow covers his face. He is wearing a black dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up exposing her powerful arms and jeans encase the rest of his body that seems coiled and ready to spring. He is not looking at her however. Instead his intense gaze is on her sun and instinctively Shireen shifts her son in her arms and turns her body so that she is between this boy man and her beloved child.
She also takes a step back and forces herself to meet the gaze of the boy who broke her. She is alarmed to see a pained expression in his eyes. Pain and something like longing. She is trembling but she refuses to let herself lose this battle. She lifts up her chin and glares even more at him. This sparks something in his gaze as his expression turns hotter and hard and he steps foreword meeting her gaze head on. She refuses to allow herself to be cowed and she can feel the tension in the air between them. It is like a spell that she cant break even as her son fists some of her hair and begins to whine.
When does break it is when she feels a hand calloused from working on the sea wrap around her shoulder and rough lips press a kiss to her temple. She turns and sees Theon looking at her and asking if she is ready to go. She breathlessly says yes. He turns them and it is then she misses the glare her husband sends to boy behind them. She misses the alarmed looks on Ned Stark and her uncle. She misses the way Gendry and Asha exchange knowing looks and the way Rickon Stark looks poised to follow them until Jon Snow appears beside him and holds him back. She then misses then way Rickon glares and storms off angry.
She also misses the longing and pain in his gaze as he looks at the woman with the child in her arms. A child he was supposed to hate. And child he thought he would never be able to accept. Instead he wishes the child and the woman holding him were his.