Heh heh heh. I'm glad people are liking this story. Now lets see if Kakashi can hook up Sakura and Sasuke.

But first...

Just a heads up... I hate Sasuke. So he's going to be the butt of many jokes in this story.

Kakashi had tried to get the horrifying events of last night out of his head. The wierdness of "his" date with Sakura had almost caused him to lose interest in the Icha Icha Series.

Almost.

Now Kakashi was sitting on a bench in the park, his attention focused on one of his books, no less. He was happy now, and hoped to enjoy the rest of his weekend. But his hopes were dashed when a certain pink-haired shinobi sat down beside him with an angry huff. "Hello, Sakura. Is something wrong?" he didn't even bother to look up from his book.

"Yeah!" she growled. "I'm mad at Naruto, and I'm trying to figure out who was pretending to be him last night!"

Kakashi hesitated slightly as he went to turn the page. "Do what now?"

"Somebody was pretending to be Naruto yesterday!" she repeated.

"And you know this how?" Kakashi continued to read his book calmly.

"Because the phony was acting like a normal person, and he kept talking about how cool you were, and he was saying intelligent things," she explained.

"I see..." Kakashi turned another page. He read very fast, it would seem. "Do you have any idea who it was?"

"No... But when I find them-" Sakura punched the palm of her hand, "I'm gonna kill 'em!"

"Hm..." Kakashi wasn't worried. "So... how are things with Sasuke?"

"Terrible..." Sakura sighed sadly. "He doesn't notice me, care about me, or even look at me!"

"Hm..." Kakashi thought for a second. "Have you tried getting his attention?"

"I lit myself on fire last week," she frowned. "He didn't even look up."

"Wow..." Kakashi finally looked up at her. "Just... wow."

"Hey... Kakashi-sensei..." Sakura smirked, "Do you think you can do me a favor?"

"What sort of favor?" Kakashi asked, knowing all-too-well what it would be.

"Do you think, maybe... you could pretend to be me and go try and get Sasuke's attention?" Sakura grinned.

"Er... what?" Kakashi arched an eyebrow.

"Pleeeeeease?" Sakura pleaded. "If anyone can do it, you can!"

"Um... why?" Kakashi's eyebrow went higher.

"I dunno, I just have a feeling you can do it!" Sakura exclaimed.

"Sakura, I don't think-" Kakashi was interupted by a handfull of cash being shoved into his face.

"I'll pay you!" she grinned.

Kakashi sighed and began to make handsigns. Why pass up a chance to make a few quick bucks?

---

Kakashi, now in the guise of Sakura, walked down a small dirt path in the park. He'd been told that Sasuke was somewhere in the park. "Aha," Kakashi/Sakura noticed the emo-ninja sitting on a bench reading a magazine. Sakura sighed and decided she'd start small. She swaggered past Sasuke seductively, swaying her hips and batting her eyes. 'I'm going to Hell...' Kakashi thought to himself, sick at his stomach.

Sasuke didn't even look up.

"Hm?" Sakura stopped once she'd walked past him. She shrugged, and then walk by him again, trying to look as pretty as possible.

Sasuke still didn't look up.

"Helllloooooo?" Sakura leaned over next to him.

No response.

"Sasuke?" Sakura arched an eyebrow.

'What's his problem? Is he zoned out, or does he just feel like being a jerk?' Kakashi thought to himself.

"Hi Sakura, hi Sasuke!" Naruto suddenly rode by quickly on a bike. He had several bruises on his face, as well as a bandaged nose. Clearly, he'd gotten a suprise when he went to Sakura's house. And it wasn't the type he wanted.

"Hi, Naruto," Sakura waved.

"Hi, Naruto," Sasuke looked up, and then went back to his magazine.

'Eh?' Kakashi was confused now.

Sakura pondered for a moment, and then walked away and out of sight. A few second later, Naruto walked by casually. "Hi Sasuke," Kakashi/Naruto waved.

"Hi, Naruto," Sasuke replied.

A few seconds later, Sakura came by. "Hi, Sasuke!"

No response.

Naruto came by afterwards. "Hi, Sasuke!"

"Hi, Naruto!" Sasuke replied.

A few seconds later, Sakura walked back over to the bench and stopped to think. "Hmmmmm..." she mused.

'I'm probably going to Hell for this, but now I'm a bit worried...' Kakashi/Sakura thought sadly to himself.

Sakura started to perform handsigns. Finally, she shouted out the command: "Transform!" Instantly, she transformed into an older, more "mature" version of herself. She was semi-nude, with smoke covered certain areas. Kakashi's sharingan had obviously copied the Sexy Jutsu.

Sasuke didn't even look up.

Sakura returned to her normal appearance. "Grrrr..." she growled. She stormed away, and a few seconds later Naruto returned in her place.

'I am afraid. So afraid...' Kakashi/Naruto whimpered mentally.

Naruto began doing handsigns, and then shouted the command: "Transform!" He transformed into an older, more "mature" version of himself, just as Sakura had done. But with one exception: he was in a male form. "Hi, Sasuke..." Naruto grinned.

Kakashi had never seen so much blood come out of anyone's nose before.

---

Sakura was sitting on the park bench where Kakashi had left her, her head burried in a book she'd brought. She quickly stuffed it into her bookbag when she saw Kakashi approaching. "So how'd it go?" she asked.

"I don't want to talk about it..." Kakashi grumbled.

"Are you alright?" she asked, concerned for her teacher. He looked a bit pale, and he was holding his stomach.

"No..." he shook his head. "I just threw up everything I've ever eaten. Ever."

"Um... why?" Sakura asked.

"Don't question it..." she shook his head. "Just don't... I have some advice for you, though."

"Oh, really? What?" Sakura replied.

"Forget about Sasuke..." Kakashi waved his hands weakly. "Just don't bother. Go after Lee. Its obvious he's head-over-heels in love with you..."

"Um..." Sakura stared at him. "Okay?"

"Now pay up," Kakashi held out his hand. "I need therapy, thanks to you..."

I told you it would be messed up. Next chapter: Naruto x Hinata!

Review, please!