my 13 year old angel

chapter 3: little thief

Allen had hummed Christmas carols for days afterwards. He potted around the tiny house singing to an orchestra that didn't exist. Kanda never complained but he never enjoyed it, he hated Christmas, but in due time he got used to it. The boys had come to an unspoken agreement that Allen would cook and Kanda would clean, it just sort of happened that way. Not that there was much cleaning for Kanda to do, he just washed dishes.

It happened abruptly, on the fifth morning Allen took Kanda's empty breakfast plate away and explained his plans.

"We have to leave today." He said with a smile.

"Leave?" Kanda looked up in confusion, "where are we going?"

Allen put the plate in the sink and tapped his chin; "hmmm, I'm not sure really. It's gonna get hard cause everyone is coming back from holidays now."

Kanda scowled and rubbed imaginary dust off the counter. He and Allen didn't talk much, usually more than content to sit in silence. Sometimes they would leave and maybe mention a goodbye of sorts, but it was when they had conversations that Kanda remembered why he had so often kept his mouth shut; the kid just didn't make sense.

"Why do we have to leave anyway? We got food, a bed, what more do you want?"

"We have to leave cause the people that own the house will be coming home soon. Duh!" Allen waggled his head as though the reason was as obvious as their lack of age, "and anyway, we've got no food now."

"Wait! So you don't live here?" Kanda inquired though the more he thought about it the more it made sense. How could they possibly live here, own the place, neither of them even had a job. Kanda suddenly felt stupid for not having realised it sooner, it heated into anger and he felt filthy. "You little snitch!" he hissed at the boy, Allen flinched back in shock, "this whole time you've been stealing people's food, sleeping in their bed! And you fed me with it! You're nothing but a filthy thief."

Allen had on the single most guilty look as he rubbed his hands nervously and looked anywhere but at Kanda, "but you were dying, I just wanted to hel-"

"You should have let me! I wanted to die! I wanted to disappear" he cut Allen off yelling. When Allen said nothing and continued to look at the floor Kanda slumped back on the stool and looked at his palms with burning eyes; "I am a disgrace."

There was a desert of silence as a fissure opened up between them. They came from two completely different worlds and yet they were exactly the same, and they hated it. They hated what they had become, hated the world they lived in, they hated each other as much as they loved each other.

"I'm sorry" Allen mumbled, twisting his toes and thumbs, "I- I didn't know what else to do."

Kanda clicked his tongue and threw his head to the side, "it doesn't matter now, let's just go."

They hustled about making the tiny house look clean and untouched though they both knew that their presence would not go unnoticed. The house was too warm and inviting, that and the fridge was considerably less full. They left through the window, leaving the front door locked, and as Kanda climbed out before Allen the smaller boy tugged his shirt, making Kanda pause.

"I really am sorry" he still couldn't look up from the floor, "Kanda."

Kanda frowned at the boy and then turned his head to the cool air outside the window, "whatever" he muttered before jumping, Allen followed suit.

They walked in silence to town. Allen watched the pavement slide beneath his feet, watched as he trod along a road he couldn't. It felt like the pavement was rising at him until a new foot stepped forward and kept him standing, the frosty bite of winter ripped through his clothes making his teeth chatter like a church choir.

He glanced up at Kanda who was a good head taller than Allen, and noticed that Kanda also watched the ground disappear beneath him. Allen found himself nervous with the older boy, he was stoic calm and yet seemed always to be agitated. Allen didn't like people being mad at him. He had always tried to please people to make them happy just so that they would not be mad at him. And this boy who was taller, and had to be older than him, was the closest thing he had ever had to a friend, he didn't want to mess it up. Kanda was the only person that had stuck with Allen for longer than a few hours, in two years that was.

Allen knew what it was to be happy, to feel loved and to belong somewhere. It made the absence of those feelings feel so much worse. But he had dealt with it for two years and had strengthened his heart against feelings of despair and hopelessness. One feeling he couldn't seem to dispose of however was the lingering sadness that took refuge in his heart. It was a similarity he had subconsciously recognised in Kanda and that was why he clung to him, desperate for someone like him, someone who might be able to understand him. He was desperate to feel warm again.

Staring at his feet had allowed him to lose track of the boy in front of him and with his longer legs Kanda had disappeared into the busy streets of the town. Allen stopped and glanced all around him whispering the Asian's name repeatedly. The snow had begun to fall making it difficult to see things through the white fluff and sea of umbrellas. He took off at a run, dodging the faceless bodies that walked blindly onward. Allen suddenly felt alone again.

As he ran through the crowd he suddenly felt someone grab his wrist, jerking him violently backwards. Stumbling over his own feet his fell into the body of the person that had grabbed him and he looked up in fear only to see Kanda frowning at him.

"Now where do you think you're going?"

"I was just- you were- I couldn't" Allen huffed feeling all flustered.

Kanda just rolled his eyes and cut him off; "whatever. Okay little thief, since you're so good at stealing you're getting lunch."

"What?" he looked up wide eyed and astounded.

"Time to show you're mastery," he jabbed his thumb over his shoulder at a bakery, "we're gonna need food sooner or later. Go snitch some stuff from here so that we can save it for desperate times."

"But I don't wanna-"

"You didn't seem to have an issue with stealing from the family whose house we slept in!" Kanda growled at him in a threatening manner.

"But this isn't the same!" Allen cried.

"It's exactly the same. You're a little thief, you're not supposed to think; you steal!" he hissed.

Allen reeled back; "I'm not a thief! I only steal when I'm desperate and you were going to die!"

"And doing this will prevent that from happening! This is planning ahead, we won't be greedy and we won't eat it straight away. We'll ration it okay?"

Allen still looked in indecision, wanting Kanda to like him and wanting to do what he knew was right.

"I'm older so I know better, so just do it. I'll just be over there." He pointed to the other side of the street before shoving Allen towards the door and running across the crowd.

Allen looked feebly over his shoulder at the disappearing older boy and then back at the bakery, which suddenly looked very big he took a big gulp before taking a step forward. In all of his two years he had never done something as foolish as this, he had stolen, yes, but only in times of dire need and only in circumstances that were feasible; open shops and market places, places where you could grab off the table and run. He had never actually walked into a shop to steal. It was the same as walking into the lion's den in his mind.

A bell jangled as he walked in and he glanced around before allowing the door to close. It was a popular bakery that was filled with people. Allen walked straight up to the nearest rack of bread and started shoving bread into his arms, glancing over his shoulder nervously. Hugging four rolls tightly to his chest he started to back slowly away and out of the shop, feeling that he had almost reached the door he turned quickly in order to run but instead knocked his face into someone's stomach.

"Dear me, little boy, I don't believe you've paid for those." A scary looking woman with curly hair and hollowed eyes smiled down at him.

In panic Allen shoved the rolls into her arms and ran through the door with another tinker. He was it straight away by the crowd and could see Kanda across the sea of umbrellas, glaring at passersby with his arms crossed, before he leaped down the cement steps and battled his way through the horde fearing that at any second a police officer was going to suddenly grab him and take him to prison. His young mind throwing at him all the worst possible situations that could happen to him. Finally he reached his friend still slightly panic stricken and sucking air.

"Where's the food?" Kanda growled.

"I couldn't!" Allen stammered; "there was a woman and she, she-"

"You got caught?!" Kanda near shouted.

Unable to answer Allen nodded his head vigorously, squeaking out a 'sorry!'

"You're useless!" he scowled, "come on we better go." And he turned quickly to march off.

Allen jumped forward to keep up with him but felt two hands on his shoulders and froze in fear. It was the police. He just knew it; they had caught him and were going to take him away. The woman had told on him and now he was going to go to prison, all for a couple of bread rolls he didn't even want!

As if sensing that something was wrong Kanda turned around to check on Allen only to see the boy frozen. They locked eyes and then Kanda saw the hands on the younger boys shoulders and followed the arms upwards his face paling as he did so until he was a stiff as Allen was staring at a woman.

"I think I understand what's going on here." A familiar voice sounded from behind Allen and he took the nerve to glance upwards at the scary woman from the bakery. "I'm sorry I frightened you!" now that Allen had been let go he noticed that she seemed to be close to tears; "b-but I just wanted to give you this!" she grabbed Allen's small, pale hand and gently placed the bread roll into his palm, "now you be a good boy. I'm so very sorry I can't do anymore!" and she stood, giving one more tear filled look over her shoulder she walked away; one of the only people without an umbrella.

Allen watched the snow and crowd swallow her up before he felt a vicious tug pull him to face the other way to face Kanda who held his hand out; "give it here."

Without question Allen allowed Kanda to take the bread and put it into Allen's backpack, Kanda pushing him back the other way in order to do so.

"What have you got in here?" Kanda questioned as he zipped the bag back up.

Allen blushed and mumbled a reply; "just stuff." He turned around to see that Kanda had already walked off in indifference and Allen jogged to keep up with the long legs. "Where are we going?" Allen asked.

"I'm going to go and find a place to sleep." He looked down at his small companion in a strange way before he sighed and shook his head. "You're not much of a thief are you."

Allen pouted, which Kanda saw from the corner of his eye and bit back a smirk, "I'm not a thief. But there are wrong and right times to steal. That was a wrong time and that's why I was caught." He huffed.

"How long you been living like this for?" Kanda asked with an air of disinterest glancing around at the people passing them by.

"Two years."

"Two years?!" Kanda whipped around to stare at him with wide eyes before he coughed into his hand and looked forward with a bored expression, "that's quite a while." He caught Allen shrugging his shoulders. "So then, how old are you?"

"I'm thirteen now." Allen smiled.

"You don't look it." Kanda huffed.

Allen frowned; "well then how old are you?"

"Sixteen."

"You don't look it either."

Kanda looked down at his arms which he extracted from his coat sleeves to see that they were very thin, he fingers bony and the wrist seemed to jut out at an odd angle. His skin looked very pale and delicate and he realised that, judging by his hands, he either looked like a new born baby or a very old man. He began to feel very small.

A/N so yeah, took me a while eh? No update for a long time. And certainly no update on this for a long time. I've been in a very funny mood recently. And when I'm in this mood I usually draw. But I'm at an artist's block and can't seem to draw for shit. This was the only fic that seemed to match the mood I'm in so this is the best I can do for you all. Thankyou to all those that read this, all my reviewers watchers and favourite-rs. My fuel I'm writing for you.

Reviews are like candy at Christmas.