Mornings
Pairing: McCollins
Prompt: Andy confesses her feelings to Nick. Takes place after the 4x13

Notes: This is a continuation of CrazyB81 drabble which is posted on tumblr. I highly recommend you read that one for greater insight to this one however, this can stand alone too.

Mornings with Andy were always his favorite.

Knowing that each day for the last few weeks he had been able to open his eyes and see her smiling face first thing was enough to make him look forward to each and every day. However, after yesterday's events he found himself dreading this morning. So instead of opening his eyes when he felt her get up and out of bed, he chose to double down and clamp them shut; as if to hold on to the dream of them for just a few minutes more. Still, despite his best efforts he couldn't deny it anymore when she called out to him from across the room.

"I told Sam I love him last night."

At her admission, oddly he thought of Afghanistan, and how on rare occasions he would wake up to the sound of bombs going off nearby, stirring up clouds of blinding sand and smoke combined with the disoriented screams of his fellow officers. At the time, he couldn't think of a worse way to wake up, now he knew better.

Sitting up wordlessly he shook the memory from his mind and turn to look at her. She was standing against the armoire still wearing his ARMY shirt and boxers; full lips worried between her teeth, hair mussed, eyes glistening with tears and something else he couldn't quite name, as he tried to remember all the reasons why he shouldn't love her.

What was it that she had told him when he started this? His mind raced as she continued.

"…we were in the ambulance and Sam was hurt so I told him a story to ease his mind. I thought… I thought he was going to die and never know that I…" She started, and trailed off after she saw his hand go up.

"Its okay Andy, you don't— you don't have to explain. "

Standing from the bed wearing his pajama bottoms he turned away from her and walked to the closet. Unable to look at her anymore and hating how small his voice sounded and the tears now prickling the back of his eyes, he desperately fumbled for a sweatshirt. Feeling like he needed to get out of here before he completely lost it. He had just found one when he felt her fingertips on his back. Instead of yielding to her touch like he usually did he felt himself stiffen.

"Nick, please, just hear me out."

A few tense moments passed before he relaxed against her touch, and turned to face her.

"I thought Sam was going to die and I told him I love him because its true. I do love him. He's played such a big part in making me who I am today, and showing me that I can trust my instincts and my gut, and that's something I will always appreciate about him. Because if it wasn't for him I never, ever could have come this far, I never would have signed up for undercover, and I never would have had gotten the chance to really be on my own and learn how not to be afraid… So I love him for that."

Swallowing the lump in my throat I looked away, only to have her hand gently turn chin back to her

"I also love him for giving me a reason to leave and not be afraid of taking chances or even surprises because you Nick Collins are the best surprise I've ever had and I as much as I love Sam, as much as he's helped me become the person I am today it wasn't until last night and facing the very real possibility of almost losing both of you that could tell the difference between loving someone because of what they mean to you, and being IN LOVE with someone because of who they are..."

His confused state only grew more apparent as she spoke. But all the confusion, heartache and pain was gone the moment she stepped forward cupped his face with her hands and finished.

"And you Nick Collins are the most, honest, open and caring person I've ever met. So even though I do love Sam and what he means to me I'm in love with you because of everything you are and who I am, and I don't want to deny it anymore, I don't want to run from it, and I really don't want it to run from-"

Anything else that she was planning on saying was cut short as he crushed her lips against his own; desperately needing to get that out before he said another word. While they stood wrapped in each others embrace silhouetted in the window, behind them mornings rays enveloped them and happily chased all the pain and darkness away.

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