Disclaimer: We own only the plot of this story and Elizabeth Sheppard

Chapter Two:
Cuniary Genius

"Can I leave this place already? I never knew how boring it could possibly be, doing absolutely nothing in this blah place. You should, like, paint it bright pink and bright green! It'll make the patients a hell of a lot happier!" Elizabeth was saying to Keller a few days later.

Keller sighed. "Yes, you're allowed to leave now, and no, we're not going to be painting this place anytime soon. It's against regulations."

"Screw the regulations!" Elizabeth shouted as she jumped down off of the infirmary bed.

Keller rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I'll screw the regulations when McKay admits that Carter is smarter than him."

"He does admit that."

"Yeah right!"

"It's true. About a month to two months from now, he admits that Carter is smarter, but McKay can save the day."

Keller gave her a fake glare. "I meant in our time. Anyway, wanna grab some breakfast?"

"Hell yeah!"

"Hey, language," Keller shunned.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes now. "Yeah, whatever."

The two walked in silence to the mess hall.

At the mess hall, they spotted Teyla, Sheppard, McKay, Amelia, Ronon, and Woolsey sitting at the far end table. They grabbed their breakfast and sat down with them.

"Morning," Sheppard said. He tapped his pen against the table, looking at a crossword in front of him. Amelia glanced over at it. She pointed to one of the words.

"Yeah, that'd be Dom."

"That's comedy's DeLuise? I could've sworn it was Peter, David, or Michael," Sheppard said, filling it in. "But of course, none of my answers ever fit."

"Why'd you put fatso for the last name of an non-violent Indian protestor? It's Gandhi, okay, not fatso."

Sheppard turned his head to look at her. "How do you know he wasn't overweight?"

She sighed. "He fasted a lot. I doubt that he'd be fat." She shook her head and continued diagnostics on one of the computer padds.

Elizabeth noticed for the first time that there was no food on the table, other than the pancake and waffle on her and Keller's tray.

"Where's your guys' food?"

Before anybody could answer, some of the chef personnel people came over with slightly steaming plates. Chuck arrived behind them with one plate in his hand. He set it down in front of Amelia.

"Here you go, Mademoiselle, an omelet. Perfecto!" He pulled up a chair between her and Sheppard. The chef personnel people placed the other plates in front of everyone else, excluding Elizabeth and Keller.

"I don't get an omelet?" Elizabeth said, disappointed.

"If I had known you were here, you would have had one, but since you weren't here, you don't get one," Chuck said.

Everyone started taking their first bite of the omelets. They slowly chewed it.

Sheppard looked at Chuck. "Who made these omelets? Cause whoever did is a culinary genius! These things are amazing."

Chuck smiled. "That, my friend, would be me."

"Yeah, right, like you can cook. If I managed to blow up a dishwasher, I want to see what the kitchen looks like," Amelia said.

"Right this way, my lady," Chuck said, getting up and gesturing towards the kitchen with his arm. Amelia got up and Chuck followed her to the kitchen.

"Maybe he spiked these with something, like liquor. Or maybe there are, like, wraith genes in here. Dead Steve soufflé, yum-yum," Sheppard said once they had left.

Everyone looked at him and dropped their forks down onto their plates.

"Gee, thanks for spoiling my appetite," Keller said.

Amelia walked in at that point with an astonished face. "The kitchen is spotless. I can't believe it. Chuck is a culinary genius."

Chuck bowed and said, "At your service."

Amelia slapped his head and sat down in her chair again. "I'm a freaking failure."

"No, you're not a failure. It's just that I'm that awesome."

Sheppard looked at Chuck. "We were all wondering, did you put something in here? Like liquor, or wraith guts?"

Chuck laughed. "Yes, I did. Do you really want to know?"

"Yes!!" Everyone shouted in unison.

Chuck sighed. "Well, the secret ingredient in these outstanding omelets is—"

A/N: If you want to give ideas as to what the ingredient is, shoot 'em out! I have one idea, but…. I'll see what you have to say. Input greatly wanted. Please R&R!!!!!!