Damon parks his car in the lot and after pulling his violin out of the backseat, he walks around it to help Elena out. Opening the door for her, he steps back so she can stand up. He extends his elbow for her to link onto, leaving it up to her to decide. He can see the uneasy look on her face but just as quickly as it appears, one of determination replaces it. She smiles and places her hand at his elbow, her soft fingers holding firmly.
He understands why she's a little squeamish around him, Caroline filled him in even before he had the pleasure of meeting her. If only he had the power to turn back time to be able to save not only her but his beloved cousin Rose. He begged and pleaded with her to let him help but she was delusional, always believing that each beating was the last. In the end, he shot her in the face and then turned the gun on himself. He still aches inside, wondering if he did enough. In his head he knows he did everything he could possibly do to remove her from that environment but the heart is a different thing all together. Mostly he just misses her.
There's something about Elena though. Beneath the small yet perfect dove is an eagle waiting to spread her wings. When they were introduced, he shook her hand and felt a jolt, something confusing yet magical. His attraction to her, he's never felt anything like it before, simply put, her mere presence took his breath away.
Entering the park, a slight breeze rustles the leaves making them fall to the solid ground. The air is warm and her olive skin glows. Flowers are vast, and they conceal the freshly cut green grass. The pathway is nothing more than dirt littered with random rocks. The sounds of children playing puts a smile on her face. Sunbeams pour through narrow openings in the pale clouds as it outlines the fringes of the lazy drifting ones.
"What's it like to play the violin?" Elena asks, her eyes meeting his as they continue down the path towards the bandshell.
"I don't know if I can explain it but I'll try. There's something about the way the violin sings... it takes my mind into the heart of symphonies, deeply harrowing and torrential in the way it encompasses my body. I have yet to find anything that has such a sway over me."
"That's beautiful, Damon."
He laughs. "Not always, the violin can be your friend or your mortal enemy, however, it helps me convey my feelings to the crowd. Its slender strings caress my fingers, its curves, tenderly trace under my palm, and to me, nothing in the world can possibly compare to the sense of empowerment I feel when I'm performing. It becomes a part of me."
Speechless for a second, Elena feels a sense of relief when they reach the bandshell.
"Let's get you a good seat." Damon points to one in the center, not far from the front. When she lets go of his arm, he winks at her before joining the rest of the symphony on stage.
Sitting quietly, Elena smiles when she catches him looking at her. Damon seems like a really great guy and lord knows, Caroline is his biggest cheerleader. He's a physical therapist just like she is. On the drive over, he told her a little bit about his work and the sense of fulfillment he gets when one of his stroke patients learns to walk again.
Still it took a lot for her to agree to this date. She vacillated back and forth, bouncing from one foot to the other. There are days when her breath balls up in her chest. It feels as if cold, sharp tendrils are squeezing at her throat, robbing her of breath when he haunts her sleep. Her nails are bitten down to the quick. She nibbles at their frayed edges like a famished mouse. She was about to say no when Caroline reprimanded her about letting Julian still control her life.
Raising her eyes, she considers him again. He's talking to the woman sitting next to him, also with a violin in her hand. She has gray hair, a kind smile and she looks like she's in her fifties or sixties. Elena imagines that he could charm the scales off a cobra. No one feature makes Damon so handsome but his eyes... They're so expressive, she's convinced they would be beautiful in any shade. From them comes an intensity, an honesty, a gentleness. Perhaps this is what is meant by a gentleman, not one of weakness or trite politeness, but one of great spirit and noble ways. What he is, what is beautiful about him, comes from deep within; it makes her want to feel how his lips move in a kiss, how his hands follow the curves of her body. There's no doubt they would be gentle.
Where did that come from?
Suddenly music fills the air without effort, like the waves filling holes in beach sand; the sound rushing in and around every person enjoying the concert. Some react to the beat, others continue to chatter, but always it speaks to them in some manner. A lively tempo can lift them, elevate the spirit, or move them to dance. A slow one can relax the mood. She finds herself lost in the music herself, happy times filling her mind, her childhood, her life before... Adrenaline floods her system - right into her blood stream. She thinks her heart will explode as it skitters inside her chest. Her body wants to run for the hills. Adrenaline is surging so swiftly that she can taste the saliva thickening in her mouth and her stomach churns chaotically. Her hands are knotted on her lap. Almost miraculously she raises her eyes and meets his. They're soothing a like a balm, she forces a smile and works on her breathing till the anxiety dissipates.
No! She's not going to let him ruin today for her.
"So what did you think?" Damon asks when he opens the car door for Elena so she can get in. Looking up at him, she puts a smile on her face.
"It's been a lovely afternoon. I never realized how enjoyable it would be."
"So, I thought we could get something to eat and then I'll take you home. Is that okay?"
Taking a breath, she turns her head to meet his eyes. "Yes, I'd like that. Thank you, Damon."
"You're welcome. I actually love these free concerts. Symphony tickets aren't inexpensive... I love when we can play for everyone and not just those able to afford such an expense."
"It's very admirable of you."
"I'm just a regular guy, Elena... Um, so I was thinking Chinese unless you'd prefer some other cuisine..."
"No, Chinese is fine."
"Great," he says and pulls out on to the road to go to his favorite restaurant. They sit in comfortable silence on the way over but he can tell by her body language that she's still not entirely comfortable with him. Understandable. He knows he needs to take it slow and easy with her. When they reach the restaurant, he pulls into a parking space and turns off the ignition. Stepping out, he skirts the hood to open the door for her.
Elena takes a subtle breath to calm her frazzled nerves and then steps out. Damon gestures for her to lead the way, his palm landing lightly on the small of her back as they enter the restaurant. Surprisingly, she doesn't jump or gasp when she feels it. After they're seated, the waitress brings them menus and takes their drink orders.
Elena looks around at the Asian décor. The ambience is comfortable, the lights low and noise level low. They place their orders when the waitress returns and Damon excuses himself to use the bathroom. Sitting all alone she feels uneasy, nearly jumping out of her seat when another restaurant patron accidentally brushes against her on the way to her booth. Her foot is bouncing against the floor and then suddenly he returns and takes the seat facing her.
Before they can really have a conversation, their food is delivered. Her Garlic Chicken smells heavenly and his Moo Goo Gai Pan looks wonderful. Taking a bit, she closes her eyes to savor the tastes when they erupt on her tongue. She can't even remember when the last time she was at a restaurant.
"Caroline tells me you're a veterinary tech?"
"Yes, I love working with animals, I always have. I'm just getting back into it... Ehm, I didn't work for a couple years." He wouldn't let her.
"That's great, Elena. I'm glad you're able to do something you love." Damon takes a bite of his food, moaning at the delicacy. It's then that he notices how she's only picking at her food.
"You're not hungry?"
"I'm sorry, I really am," she slurs her words. She tries to focus on her breathing but anxiety begins to bubble inside her rib cage making her sick to her stomach. Pulling her napkin off her lap, she tosses it on the table and hurries to the bathroom. Slipping into one of the stalls, she tries to rein in her emotions. Her face is numb and she's crying, but why is she? Damon's been nothing but a gentleman to her. The world seems closer to her eyes and the air becomes thick and harder to breathe and her thoughts scatter like there's an electrical storm in her head, too many flashes of lightning to make sense of it all. The minutes tick by while she struggles to regain her composure. Finally after wiping the last remnants of tears from her eyes, she steps out of the stall and washes her face. She's so embarrassed, how will she possibly explain this to him?
When she returns, he stands and pulls the chair out for her. "Do you want to go home?" he asks softly, his voice full of understanding, more than she deserves.
"You wouldn't mind?"
"No, no, of course not. I like you Elena but I'm not going to push you into anything that you're not ready for," he eyes her hand and lays his on top of it for a few seconds. Signaling the waitress, he pays the bill and leads her outside, his palm on her lower back once more. Somehow his touch isn't scary, it feels safe.
On the drive home, he turns on the radio, soft instrumental soothing music. They sit in silence till he pulls alongside the curb when they reach Caroline's place. Damon walks her to the front door. Turning to face him, she apologizes but he stops the words with a finger on his own.
"There's no reason to apologize, Elena. You didn't do anything wrong... Would it be okay if I call you again?"
"I'd like that."
Leaning forward, he presses the wispiest of kisses to her cheek and then opens the door for her. Once she's safely inside, he trots down the steps, gets in his car and drives away. What he doesn't see is Elena staring through the curtain, watching his vehicle till the tail lights disappear when he makes a right turn.
Not wanting to speak to Liz or Caroline, she goes up the stairs as quietly as possible. As soon as she's safely in her room with the door locked, she drops face first onto her bed. Thoughts coalesce inside her head, she wants them to slow so she can breathe but they won't. Her heart is hammering inside her chest like it's trying to tear itself out of her body. Tears begin well in her eyes. Why couldn't she have met him first? Damon's a good man, what can she offer him but a little bird with broken wings?
And then he's there again, she remembers how her body jarred with each blow, how pain seared her skin and stole every feeling of safety she'd ever known. His sinewy arm would recoil and snap back to her naked behind, her back, her legs, her breasts, the impact delivered by an object rather than his hand. Crying wasn't allowed and if she did, he'd give her more to cry about. He did too, too many times to count. He was her hero and her monster... You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain...
Exhausted from all the adrenaline spent, she slips out of her clothes and crawls under the covers, falling quickly into an uneasy sleep.
She lays curled up on the bed, blood seeping beneath her skin, forming purple welts. It hurt to breath, she's sure some ribs are cracked. When she rolls over, he's standing above her with his hand clenched into a fist. Before she can shield herself, he smashes it against her face...
Lurching upright, Elena startles awake with a painful cry. It takes her several minutes to realize that she's safe. She kicks back the covers to throw some water on her face but before her foot reaches the floor, Caroline is pounding on the door frame.
As soon as she unlocks it, Caroline yanks it open and wraps Elena in a hug till she calms down. "Bad dream?"
Elena nods, wiping her tears for the third time today. "Come on, let's wash you face." She takes her friend's hand and has her sit on the toilet seat. With gentle hands, the blonde washes and dries her face. "Do you want me to stay?"
Although she hates being a child, she bobs her head. Caroline tucks her in and then slides under the covers on the other side of the bed. "Do you want to talk about it, Damon I mean?"
"He was wonderful, Care. That's just it, he deserves better than damaged goods."
"Don't you talk like that. You're the most beautiful person I know. Damon knows that too. If he wasn't interested, he wouldn't have asked. Don't close the door on him, not yet, he's one of the best people I know. And if I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times and I'll keep saying it till you believe it. Julian may have won a few battles but he doesn't get to win the war, not now or ever again."
Unable to speak, Elena shakes her head, snuggles in next to Caroline and closes her eyes, letting her friend rock her into a dreamless slumber.
Waking up, she spreads her arms and realizes Caroline is gone. For the first time in a long time, she feels refreshed, having slept solidly with her best friend at her bedside. After a good stretch, she gets up and dresses. She has another appointment with Dr. Mikaelson today. When she gets downstairs, Liz is just getting ready to leave but stops to pour Elena a cup of coffee.
"Caroline told me you had a bad night, are you okay?"
"Not yet. Logically I know he's in prison and he can't get to me, it's still so hard to just let it go."
"You see your therapist today though right?"
"I do," she takes a swallow of her coffee.
"Maybe it's none of my business but I'm going to ask anyway... how was your date with Damon?"
"Damon was amazing, I can't help but believe he deserves someone who doesn't have so many skeletons."
"Elena, don't you talk like that. And you're right, Damon is a wonderful man. Caroline has been singing his praises since she met him. Don't box yourself into a corner, don't throw away something that could be great because you're afraid. You're much stronger than you give yourself credit for."
"Thanks Liz."
"It's true," she says firmly, giving Elena a light hug. "I have to get to work." After setting her mug in the sink, she pauses at the door and turns around. "Do you need a ride?"
"That would be great." She finishes her coffee, grabs her bag and follows Liz outside, pulling the door closed behind her.
Stepping in front of the reception desk, she tells the woman that she's here for her appointment. The woman smiles and informs the doctor. Just as she puts the coffee cup to her mouth, he steps out, a comfortable smile gracing his face. He uses his arm to gesture for her to come in. After he closes the door, he tells her to take a seat. She's tense and jumpy and that does not go unnoticed by him.
"How are you, Elena?" he asks, his voice soft and she understands that he's trying to facilitate things for her.
"I don't know, sometimes I think I'm starting to put it behind me, other times, I have panic attacks, flashbacks, the need to run and hide." After taking another swallow of coffee she looks up at him, surprisingly feeling a little more at ease in his presence.
"Julian was great at first but honestly it didn't take him too long to show his true self. I burnt his supper one night, he slapped me. And as most abusers, he apologized profusely, promising it wouldn't happen again..."
"Elena, a lot of women are in your shoes. You're here, talking about it. That takes a lot of courage."
She reaches for a Kleenex to dab her moist eyes. "I went on a couple of dates, he couldn't have been nicer to me."
"And?"
"When I had a panic attack at the restaurant, he took me home. The next time we went to a movie. He always takes me to a public place, I'm fairly certain that he knows about me. My best friend introduced us, she loves him, says he'll be good for me...," she pauses to blow her nose.
"What do you think?"
"I liked him, I just don't want to drag him down, I have so much baggage." Her cheeks feel hot with embarrassment.
"Who among us doesn't have baggage, Elena? I cannot tell you what to do, no one can but if you like this man, give him a chance to know you. Tell him about yourself. If he's as wonderful as your friend says, he'll understand why you have reservations."
"I don't want to hurt him," she adds, nervously brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Elena, relax. You are safe here. I'm not here to judge you, I'm here to help you move forward with you life."
"Thank you, Dr. Mikaelson."
"You're welcome, now why don't you tell me about how you felt with the man?"
Elena nods and tells him all about her date with Damon. When she leaves his office a little while later, she stops in her tracks when she sees Damon leaning against his car.
"Damon?"
"A little bird told me you needed a ride home."
Elena's surprised to find him here, pleasantly so. Every fiber of her being is vibrating as adrenaline courses through her veins. Her hands are trembling and her mouth is slightly agape. When she meeting his eyes, she finds herself wanting to fall into their depths. The icy blueness generates a feeling like she's being pulled into a lake of conflicting emotions. They're like all the myriad shades of blue swirled together to form an intense, almost hypnotizing hue. Swallowing thickly, she can't help but suspect he knows about her life. And if he does, why is he here?
Deciding not to prejudge him, she approaches him. "Um, could you come inside with me for a few minutes?"
"Yes, of course."
Pushing herself, she reaches for his hand and takes him back into the building with her. Her doctor is in the hall with a can of soda, turning around when he hears Elena's voice.
"Dr. Mikaelson, this is my friend, Damon."
The doctor gives her an encouraging nod then takes the hand Damon extends, shaking it firmly. "Elijah Mikaelson, nice to meet you."
"You too, sir. Thank you for helping my friend."
Elijah starts to say something but when he sees his next appointment walking towards him, he says goodbye, following the woman into his office.
Once they leave the doctor's office, Damon takes her to a little coffee shop. Taking a table outside, Elena takes a seat while he goes inside to order their drinks. She looks up at the great expanse above. The sky never fails to amaze her. It's filled with mysteries, endless amounts of space and is overflowing with wonders. It's ever-changing, its various colors of navy blue, black, lavender, robin's egg blue, turquoise, and a fiery tangerine paint the dome above her. Sometimes the clouds are puffy and tall, other times they are no more than wisps.
"Here you are." At the sound of Damon's voice, she smiles, thanking him. Her thoughts are like ripples in a pond after throwing a stone into it.
"You're welcome. Thanks for spending the afternoon with me."
Finally the day she's been dreading is here. She can't halt the dawn ebbing it's gradual way into daylight. Her hands spread like pale starfish around the standard-issue coffee cup, and they are cold, resisting the warmth that struggles to seep into them. "Did Caroline tell you?"
"She did." He tilts his head, a look of melancholy washes over his face when he sees the red flush of hers. "Elena, don't be embarrassed, please. I care about you and what he did, that part of your life doesn't define who you are or what you'll do with the rest of your life. That bastard didn't fundamentally change the beautiful person I see in front of me right now. You're the strongest, bravest person I know."
She says nothing while he continues. Does he really believe that?
"You should know that I had a cousin, Rose was her name. She was in the same situation. We were the same age as close as siblings. Her parents were missionaries in Africa, they didn't want her exposed to the subtropical diseases nor did they want her to miss school so she lived with us for two years. She got involved with a bad man, he beat her too, Elena. I tried to get her away from Trevor but she refused to leave, saying she loved him. One day, she didn't walk away from it, he put a bullet in her skull and then killed himself."
So I'm a charity case for him?
"I can see it written all over your face, doubt. You couldn't be more wrong, Elena. I'm not here because of some misguided sense of guilt that I couldn't save her, I'm here because I like you, a lot. You're kind, you're brave, you're strong and you're so beautiful in here," he pauses reaching over to brush a fingertip to her temple. "If you believe anything about me, please believe that."
It's time.
A determined look washes over her face when she shifts to face him. "He turned every moment we spent together into painful, sharp memories that still eviscerate me. Even the sweet ones, which were few, are now a blade that pierces what's left of my savaged heart. He made me skeptical about people and love. And I hate him, I fucking hate him for turning me into this broken mess, and even if I never see him again, his touch will be with me for years, or maybe even for the rest of my life? He destroyed my self confidence... I remember every single word he said and how he always made me feel like trash."
"Elena?"
"No, you need to hear it," she takes a swallow of her coffee and begins to unravel the whole sordid story of Elena and Julian.
Thank you all for the wonderful response to this story so far. The DE fandom is the best there is. We're happy to be a small part of it.
Thank you Eva. Love you.
Chapter title: 'Stardust' by Gemini Syndrome.
I hope you all have a lovely day. Thank again so much for your amazing support. It means more to Eva and me than you know. We'll see you next with the WTTJ update.