"ISSEI, YOU SON OF A TROLL!"

That would've echoed throughout the household, if it weren't for the face that he set up some silencing runes that makes the house a huge sound room, not leaking any noise to the outside world!

Issei just left me to deal with the date, while he deal with the church. I have to go on a date I didn't even want in the first place!

Sigh...

What am I getting into? Well, two can play at this game...

Ah, America... The one that holds the most memes...

Kurosei: Hey, bro?

Issei: What?

Kurosei: Hey, bro?

Issei: What?

Kurosei: Hey, bro?

Issei: What?

Kurosei: Hey, bro?

Issei: What?

Kurosei: Hey, bro?

Issei: What?

Kurosei: Hey, bro?

Issei: WHAT!?

Kurosei: Hi.

[Kurosei exited chat]

With a smug grin, I took some cash before heading to the agreed meeting spot. As I whistled a tune, I passed a bat-girl handing out flyers. She handed one to me and cheerily spoke, "Take one, and your wish will come true!" I awkwardly took one before glancing at the pattern.

Yep...

Rias has most likely hasn't heard of the word 'subtle', or hasn't practiced it... Maybe she has, right?

Pffft...

I muttered out loud, "Yeah, right. If only that were true..."

Putting the piece of paper away, my mind wandered a bit to past times...

I was at a café in a quiet part of town. It was a peaceful, sunny day. I sipped my tea before openly stating to the person across from me, "Fair warning: I have a twin brother. With that out of the way, you want me to protect your daughter, or do you want me to kill someone?"

The woman across from me giggled a bit. "I actually want you to teach me how to blend in with society. Sometimes, I just need to escape." I raised an eyebrow before asking, "And what's in it for me? What do I get out of this agreement?" "What do you require?" "... A plane ticket to Kuoh." "That is it?" "It'll make sense at a later point in time. Deal?" "Deal."

I sighed before beginning, "Let's start with overall physical appearance. Your oppai are too huge, even by plastic surgery on human standards. Look at some magazines for some realistic range. Second, change your eye color. Sure, everyone likes different eye color and glance over them without a second chance, but people tend to look back and think that it's suspicious. Third, try to relax and forget all your stress. Try to be yourself within limits of the public eye. And finally..."

"Issei!" I turned to see my 'date' run up to me and greet, "Hey! Sorry to keep you waiting." I smiled and responded, "No, it's cool. I was actually worried that my older brother would find out. I'm just glad that you came." She looked at me in confusion, "You have an older brother?" I grumbled, keeping in character, "By a few minutes... He used to tease me all about it." She smiled, "Hey, forget about him for now. Let's enjoy our date!"

We walked down a street before heading into a clothes store. After trying out some clothes, we went to an ice cream parlor. While enjoying our sweets, I looked at my watch, letting out a sigh. She asked, "What's wrong?" I took on a worried look, "Nothing. It's just... Last night, my brother told me he was going to church today... Don't know why, or what sparked his interest." Suddenly, my drink went down the wrong tube, causing me to cough as she patted my back to help me.

Our last stop was the park from my vision. She quietly spoke, "I sure had fun today." I nodded in agreement, "Yeah. This was one of my best days ever." Our hands brushed.

I noticed she was about to hold my hand, but I smoothly and casually tucked them into my pockets, causing her to frown slightly. When we reached the fountain, the dominos of time fell.

"Can I ask you a question?" Step. "To commemorate this special moment..." Step. I gave a resigned nod, slowly smirking on the inside as I place my right hand at my side.

She spoke with a low grin, "Will you die for me?"

...

I sighed, after seeing her transformation sequence. She was taken aback at my reaction as I asked, "Can I ask YOU a question?" She tilted her head in confusion as I casually asked, "Do you like pranks? Because I'm not Issei... I'm his twin brother." Her eyes widened in shock as I grinned, revealing to her, "Originally, I wanted him to date you so an uproar would occur while I head to your base. However, he went on ahead at the last minute and went there instead of me." She summoned a light spear as I smiled and greeted, "Allow me to properly introduce myself. I am Kurosei Hyoudou, twin brother of Issei Hyoudou. And I'm your opponent for this night. But before we begin..."

I pulled out the flyer, and burned it, explaining, "No interruptions. My reputation with my girlfriend would take a dive if she heard of me needing help."

She growled and charged at me. I grinned savagely and shouted, "[Twisted Tempo]!" Her eyes widened even more before she quickly threw the spear at my head.

Tick.

The spear was 3 meters away from me.

Tock.

It's now 2 meters.

Tick.

4 feet away.

Tock.

1 foot.

BONG!

1 inch, and it stopped.

I casually step-sided from the spear.

Twisted Tempo, my sacred gear. Though I don't read the Bible that often, or at all, for that matter... I recalled that God created the universe in under a week or something.

I highly doubt that.

"Tempo" has two meanings. When musicians use it, it usually refers to the speed of the music in relation to the piece. In Italian, it means time. "Twisted" means warped. Thus, my sacred gear warps the flow of time itself. Well, to be more accurate, it can slows down or speeds up a target in relation to time. I can make a bullet travel faster, make magic reserves be wasted more quickly... or slow down my aging while speeding up my actions to the point of which everything around me moves slowly.

To put it simple at what I am doing as of right now... I did the ever so cliché [Time Stop]. Or rather, I replicated it. Still, it drains my magic reserves since it's the only thing unaffected by my sacred gear, meaning that I have a time limit on how often I can do it and how long I can maintain it.

And the worst part is that I know it isn't just limited to just warping the flow of time!

I calmly gripped the spear and, aiming it like a rifle, positioned it so that it wound break a tree. After doing so, I went over to the fountain behind her and sat down at the edge.

Let the trolling begin!

Third Person POV:

A few moments earlier...

"[Twisted Tempo]!" The spear was launched at Kurosei. Just as it was about to hit him, the spear suddenly change direction and hit a tree.

"Yuuma" growled and looked around before Kurosei spoke out loud from behind her, "Time is on my side, you know..." She summoned another spear, but he vanished and reappeared right next to her, "You have the worst of luck." He was now five feet in front of her, "Want me to get some ice cream?" She roared and lunged at him, but he vanished causing her to be off balance from the sudden lack of support.

She looked up and saw Kurosei eating a burger, pointing out, "I can only imagine what would've happened if Issei actually went with you instead of me." He sipped some soda before kicking her in the back.

She looked at him in fear as he finished his food, before using her wings to flee.

The air seemingly rippled before Issei faded into existence. Kurosei already had two sodas in his hands as he asked, "So, finished off the corrupt priests and exorcist?" Issei nodded, "Spared the fallen angels, aside from this bad pervert." "Neat. Soda?" As the two walked away from the park, a small girl with white hair poked her head out of the fallen tree.

She muttered, annoyed, "Troublesome..."

Meanwhile, the twins reached their house. However, Kurosei noted that three Fallen Angels were waiting outside, including "Yuuma". He slowly gave a dry stare at Issei, who chuckled nervously. Kurosei sighed before pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes, openly stating, "Some ground rules is some weren't given by my younger brother. Rule 1: Don't destroy the house. Rule 2: Don't make us go broke. Rule 3: Wear something descent. Rule 4: Don't ask us what we do for a living unless we tell you about them. Rule 5: Passively blue-ball my perverted little brother here as much as possible if you don't like rule 3. Those are the rules, and I'm done for the day. I also have a girlfriend who is VERY territorial. That is all, hope you enjoy your stay."

As he spoke, the girls were getting redder and redder with each word while Issei kept on growling. When he finished, the blushes were gone and the girls had sadistic smirks on their faces while Issei was embarrassed.

I decided to add, just to reignite old habits, "If you need me, I'll be in my room watching anime."

As I walked up the stairs, one of them finally asked, "Dragon Ball or Naruto?" I shouted as I entered my room, "Yugioh franchise, followed by a bit of Jojo's Bizarre Adventures!"

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