Ch. 3 The First Confrontation…Sorta

After eating half their weight in cheese nachos, Zim and both his sidekicks returned to Zim's underground base. But all 3 would-be invaders were unaware that a very angry and burned warrior was watching them from the inside of his damaged ship.

(The Samuinja's/Ninjurai's spaceship)

"Hrrr…impressive Zim, you might be worth my (ouch!)while. Computer! Please watch it with the ointment! I sting easy!" the Ninjurai complained.

"Sorry sir, but I wasn't the one who initiated the super dangerous kamikaze charge. Perhaps if you had listened to your samurai instincts, you might have beaten him without getting these atrocious burns." The computer snapped as it used a mechanical arm to dab ointment on the Samuinja's wounds.

"Fine, I'll engage him in honorable combat!" the bounty hunter shouted. "But not without giving him a dose of this." He pulled out a tiny dart from his belt.

"What's that?"

"Well, computer it's a rare OW! I said easy with the ointment!"

"Sorry, sir."

The Ninjurai quickly blew on his wound, trying to get rid of the pain. "As I was saying, this dart contains a rare poison."

"You're going to poison him?"

"No, I'm not that dishonorable! It's a rare poison that activates almost as soon as it's in the target's system. The victim will instantly become a disoriented, unbalanced wreck. Making the hunt, much more easier." He laughed. "Soon Ow, victory will be Ow! Mine…"

(Zim's front door.)

"Ha, this security system was easier to infiltrate than I thought!" the hunter thought to himself. "I guess my wonderful disguise was able to fool it!" it turns out that the Ninjurai's "wonderful disguise" was a sack of bran with eyeholes. "Now to get inside!" he immediately pressed the doorbell. Then GIR slowly opened the door. (in his doggy suit.)

"Hey, you a sack of bran! You got me my wish yet?" GIR asked the bran sack samurai.

"You know too much! Heeyaa!!!" The sacked samurai immediately attacked GIR, and after a short fight he had defeated the little robot and entered the base. "That robot put up quite a fight. Now to find the entrance to Zim's real base!" But after 30 minutes of searching, the entrance couldn't be found. "This isn't working. I need someplace to think. But where would I find such a place…" Then he spotted the toilet. "Bingo!" he then jumped to it. "I always think better when I'm sitting dow-" Unfortunately for him, his leap caused him to lose his balance and fall right into the porcelain bowl. "Augghhh!" he screamed, expecting to hit sewage when he reached the bottom. But was instead greeted by solid ground. "Oooooo…wait!" he looked around his new surroundings and realized he was inside Zim's base! (Author Note: remember the toilet entrance?) "Hahahah…Now to find Zim!" the warrior scooted forward with zeal and determination…even if he had no clue where he was going.

(Zim's current whereabouts)

Zim was using a hammer device (picture a normal hammer, only irken.) to put the finishing touches on his latest project. "Now all I need is to power my newest creation, and by this time tomorrow all of humanity shall be wiped off the face of this rotating dirtball!" a feeling of great contentment overcame Zim. "All is right with the universe."

"WARNING! ALL IS NOT RIGHT WITH THE UNIVERSE!" Zim's computer wailed.

"What are you talking about?" the irken asked intensely. "My creation is finished, the humans are unsuspecting and I just ate an entire bowl of NACHHHOOOSSSS!!!! How is that not 'right'?"

"Sensors indicate that a medium-sized spaceship entered Earth's atmosphere at these coordinates!" it told Zim. A small strip of paper came out of a slot near Zim, the irken immediately snatched it away.

"Let me see these coordinates!" Zim barked. But as he examined the paper he couldn't help but snicker. "Computer! Get your sensors checked! Your info is flawed! I should know, I was at these exact space coordinates at the supposed time! All I saw was a tiny, insignificant screaming meteor!"

"Object could have been cloaked."

"You dare challenge the judgment of Zim?! Besides, if it was some cloaked screaming spacecraft, lock on to it's crash sight!"

"Scanning…no crash sight found." The message "Location unknown" flashed on the computer screen.

"Hmmmm…that is strange." Zim pondered. "Computer! List all possible reasons for this."

"Calculating…found 2 results." On the screen flashed the two results the computer could think of.

Zim stared in disbelief…then fell on the floor in a fit of hysterical laughter. "Nuclear Space monkeys is the number one result?! Hahaha, and what's the other one?"

"Bounty hunters."

Zim regained his composure and stood up. "Bounty hunters? Ha! That's even more ridiculous than the Nuclear Space Monkeys! No one would dare to attack Zim!"

"But what about Sizz-lor, Tak, Hobo 678, the Abductors, the Planet Jackers and Dib? Didn't they attack you?" the computer asked.

"Ummm…uh…SILENCE! No one would attack me…at the present moment! And further more-OUCH!" he yelped as he felt a sting on his neck. "What the?" he removed the object from the back of his neck…a dart. "Who could've?" Zim turned around to see…a sack of bran. "Where did that-"

"Aughhh!!!" screamed the bran sack. "I've been discovered!" the sack quickly hopped away.

"Wait! Stop!" Zim ran after it, but as he ran he started to feel woozy. "Must get help from GIR." He thought to himself. Zim slowly walked to the elevator and entered the living room. "GIR, GIR where are you?" Zim looked around, but couldn't find the little robot. "Maybe the bran sack destroyed him."

"Hey master!" said a voice from the ceiling. Zim looked up to see GIR stuck in the ceiling's tentacles.

"GIR! How did you…ooohhhh." Zim started to feel disoriented.

"Well this bran sack had my wish and I tried to fight him for it, but he blew me up and he fell down the toilet. And I just saw him go out the door." GIR smiled.

"You moro-oh, something's wrong. I'm getting all unbalanced and disoriented." Zim observed. "Must…stay here…figure out…antidote…but have to…appear at school tomorrow...to look....NORMAL…no…choice…have to test…it now!" Mustering up what little strength he had, Zim gave his computer one last order, before falling unconscious.