TITLE: The slightly evil and unethical thoughts of Alex Eames

CHAPTER TITLE: Back to the unethical thoughts of Alex Eames

RATING: T, for use of language and wicked thoughts from both parties
PAIRING: Goren/Eames (Duh!)
SUMMARY: She was watching him on the dance floor, with another woman, again. And she just couldn't stand it.
DISCLAIMER: They are not mine and they never will be (sob), so I'm just playing with them for a little bit. I don't make any money from this, it's just for fun. After all, they are all work and no play.
NOTES: So here is chapter 3, back into the mind of Alex Eames, hope you all enjoy this chapter. I had fun writing it. Sorry it took me so long to update, but I have a concussion. Life's a bitch.

Oh and this chapter ends with a nice cliffhanger. I sure as hell wouldn't mind being in her position. Actually I'm kinda jealous.

Chapter 3

'Fuck, fuck, fuck!'

She was ready to bang her head against the steering wheel. She felt like such an idiot at the moment. What she had done was unforgivable. Never, ever would she forgive herself for what she had done tonight.

The moment she had spoken those rude, hell bitchy words, she had wanted to take them back. But she just couldn't stop. Like she wasn't in control of her own mouth. It seemed as if all those long, long years of frustration, of waiting by the side line had finally taken its toll on her.

She had been like a bomb that had gone off, right in the middle of Bobby's face. She had yelled at her partner in the middle of a dance club, while they were working. People had been staring at her. And not because they thought she was cute, no they must have thought she had gone completely loco. She probably had, looking back at how she behaved in the past hour or so.

She was aware of the fact that she had hurt him. It was difficult not to notice it. After all those years she knew how to read him. Tonight the look in his eyes had been enough to tell her how he felt. It was written in those big brown orbs that could never lie.

What hit her the most was the fact that he didn't blame her, he blamed himself. She wished he would yell at her. But he didn't. He remained silent, his shoulders hunched. He almost, almost seemed small.

'Stupid bitch' she thought.

He sat next to her and she drove off at full speed, desperate to get away from the place where she had acted so foolishly. She drove faster than she normally did. He must have noticed it, since he notices everything, but he didn't comment on it. He did nothing, in fact.

She shot a quick look at him and wondered how such a big man could look so fragile. She had to fight back the urge to touch him, now wasn't the time for it. He didn't pay attention to the road in front of him, he looked down to his freshly polished black leather shoes.

He reminded her of a little boy that had done something wrong. But he hadn't. She was the one at fault.

She knew she had to say something, she just didn't have a clue on how to explain it all to him. Saying: I'm so sorry I behaved like an ass, but that's because I'm head over heels in love with you, that just didn't seem like a great idea. Too much honestly wasn't great either.

Still, she had to speak up soon, since they were nearing his home. She took a deep breath and broke the silence.

"Bobby?" she said carefully "I'm so sorry."

He looked up at her in surprise. It was damn clear he hadn't expected those words.

"I…I..I don't understand" he replied.

His eyes told him he was still so unsure. He was still reminding her of that little boy. She could hit herself for hurting him. She tightened the grip on her steering wheel, to prevent herself from touching the man that was sitting next to her.

"I'm sorry I behaved like a moron." She said and kept her eyes on the road. Looking at him now, would certainly be her undoing. "I have no idea what came over me. So I'm really sorry about what I said to you, I didn't mean it."

'Please accept my apology' she thought. 'Please don't run away from me'

"But..but, I thought it was me. You said I behaved improperly. You were completely right to mention it."

Couldn't he see that this was her fault? That he should be angry at her, instead of himself?

"I was wrong, Bobby" she replied softly.

He didn't answer, instead he looked out of the window. He seemed to be lost in thought. She would have considered that cute if she wasn't ready to beg on her knees for forgiveness.

"Bobby," she broke the silence again. "Please accept my apology."

She knew that she was almost pleading. Her ego would just have to handle that, he was more important than her ego.

For the second time that night he looked up in surprise. "There is nothing to forgive, Eames" he said simply, as if that was indeed the case.

"There is plenty you need to forgive. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry." Out of nothing she felt the tears well up in her eyes. She didn't have a clue where they suddenly came from. Great timing. She wanted to wipe them away before he would notice it. But of course, faith wasn't playing nice and he looked up at that moment. Immediately he noticed the tears that were apparent in her eyes. Damn him for his sense of timing.

She had not planned on crying. Hell, she rarely cried. Where did those stupid tears suddenly come from?

"Eames, what's wrong?" Now it was him that broke the silence in the car. By the sound of his voice he was surprised to see her cry. Was that man in for some surprises this night.

For the second time she wiped away the salty tears, but they just kept on coming. She needed the time to reply. Because what was wrong with her?

"I don't know" she replied honestly. "Did someone hurt you?" he asked.

She shook her head "Nobody hurt me Bobby. I hurt somebody. I hurt my partner. And now look at me, I´m crying like a lunatic."

She parked the car at the side of the road, she was well aware that she was in no state to drive right now. The car came to a halt on an empty parking space. Her hands were still on the steering wheel. She let her head hang. Her whole body shook now, her eyes were turning red and puffy, but she couldn't stop. She cried and cried and cried.

Suddenly she felt a hand on her hair. Carefully the hand put her hair behind her hair. Was this really happening?

The fact that he comforting her, meant the world to her. Perhaps there was hope for her after all.

"Look at me" he suddenly said. He said it in a whisper, but still his words rang clear in her mind. She shook her head, she didn't want him to see her like that!

"Look at me" he said again. It was still a whisper, but it was more demanding this time.

Slowly she looked up and saw him. His hand was now on her cheek. Long, elegant fingers were wiping away teardrops.

"Please don't cry" he said softly "Men don't know what to do when a woman cries." He gave her a small unsure smile.

"So far you are doing a remarkable great job." She managed to say. She smiled back at him. When she did, she felt the salt of her own tears on her lips.

"Eames" he said after a moment of peaceful silence "I accept your apology"

Her smile got brighter, when she heard the words that she so longed to hear. Again she had to fight back the urge to touch him. Her emotions were such a turmoil, she was ready to jump him.

His hand was still on the same spot, caressing her cheek. It apparently had no intention of moving.

"Please shoot me the next time I behave like that." She said with a loud sigh.

On his face appeared a boyish grin. It was very cute. She was happy to see it, she hadn't seen it in such a long time. Damn, he was irresistible now.

"To be honest I thought you were going to shoot me back there." She could hear the humor in his voice.

But what he said wasn't true. She could never shoot him. But she was damn ready to shoot Elena. He was too pretty to shoot. In her humble opinion anyways. He was a pretty man and she never wanted to be without him.

"Bobby, promise me something" she took a deep breath before she continued. She was a little nervous. "Please don't leave me."

It was clear he hadn't expected that. Wasn't she full of surprises? She hoped he would understand how important this was to her. How important he was to her.

"Never, Eames. I'll be by your side." She was ready to cry again when she heard his answer. She could so kiss him now!

"Thank you" she placed her over his. Were they having a hallmark moment? And right in their car as well. Sometimes life was just full of surprises. And apparently surprises sometimes were a great thing.

"Can I ask you a question?" he asked

Uh oh, this meant trouble. She could feel it. All her alarm clocks were going off. And her female intuition had gone rampage.

"Why were you angry?"

'Shit'

Did she have to answer that? She could have expected that he would ask that. Him being a detective genius and all.

"Eames" he said when she remained silent. She tried to divert his eyes, since he could her as well as she could read him. His eyes kept following hers. That sure didn't help in the blushing department.

"Well…., I…I….." she stammered "I don't know how to explain."

"Just try, Eames" he said when his eyes met hers again. She quickly looked away. "Did you meet somebody?" he tried gently.

That question caught her by surprise. Apparently she wasn't the only one that was full of surprises. She wondered where such a silly idea came from however. Did he really have no clue about her feeling for him? Did he really think she would be angry with him, because she had met somebody?

"No Bobby." She answered him. She realized it was time to tell the truth. "To be honest and please don't get mad with me, the truth is that I was jealous."

In an act of bravery she decided not to look at the floor but at him. She totally deserved a medal for outstanding courage. She saw the look in his eyes when her words finally dawned on him. His eyes widened and he seemed a bit shocked. Wasn't he as cute as a puppy right now?

"….Jealous?...I…I don't understand." It was good to know that she wasn't the only one that was stammering.

She took a deep breath and spilled her heart out. " I was jealous of Elena, because she was dancing with you and I was watching you from the side line. I wanted to be her, because she was dancing with you." She emphasized on the word 'you', so that he would get her full meaning.

It took a couple of seconds (in those seconds the wheels in his head were spinning on full speed) but then a wide smile appeared on his face. A smile that she had never seen before. It was the most beautiful thing that she had ever seen.

"You wanted to dance with me" he asked. The smile still on his face.

"Yes, Bobby." She replied. Although she couldn't help but think that were so much more things that she wanted to do to him. Chocolate with him (or on him) was definitely on the list.

"Why didn't you say so before?"

Really, was she such a difficult person to profile? Or had she put her feelings for him on such a tight leash that he had never noticed it?

"I don't know Bobby. Would you have danced with me?" She asked and looked at him from the corner of her eyes.

"Of course." He replied quickly, like it was perfectly obvious that he would dance with her. His answer made her smile though. This evening had turned out much better than she had expected.

"But why…?" he suddenly asked " Why would you wanna dance with….-"

"Bobby, could you please shut up" she interrupted. He immediately stopped talking.

Perhaps there was only one way of making him understand. It could turn out for the better or the worse though. She prayed it would be for the better.

Then, she turned off her thoughts. She had thought enough. She wanted to feel now. She leaned forwards and placed both her hands on either side of his face and did what she had wanted to do for years.

She kissed him.