Katara opened the door as quietly as she could, the weak rays of sunlight streaming into the hallway behind her. She set the two custards on the ledge and slowly peeked out. Zuko was in profile, his scarred side to her, sitting cross legged in the grass of the garden. His back was straight, hands resting on his knees, his eyes closed, the prince's crown catching the first rays of the day's sun as it crested the tops of the buildings in Ba Sing Se's upper ring.
He breathed long tendrils of smoke, and the slight, fragrant wind of Ba Sing Se in spring took them away. Three candles were lit in front of him, and he took the flames from the two on the ends, transferring the fire from one to the other, funneling the power through his fire chakra. Katara smiled. He'd explained his sun meditations to her, how they'd always calmed him and made him feel centered. He'd even taught them to her, worked with her to adapt them to waterbending. His face was peaceful, untroubled, and more than once, they'd shared that calm, untroubled peace when they'd meditated together. After those sessions, she always felt more invigorated than she had going in. She'd felt strong and renewed, ready to take on the world.
Katara smiled. This was a day of celebration, not just for them, but for the world, to be grateful that they were alive, to acknowledge that the alliance was growing stronger and more firm every year. The Earth Kingdom was united in a way that it hadn't been in ages. Arnook had accepted their offer, and was working with the Earth Kingdom and the South to expand the navy, and both had sent benders and engineers to the South to help rebuild. Progress meant the friends were often pulled in different directions, and it had been hard to learn that they didn't always have to fight together, that sometimes it was better to divide their forces. Toph often spent time in the Earth Kingom teaching metalbending, Sokka and Suki would split time between the Earth Kingdom and the South, helping the navy and working with engineers on Sokka's inventions. She and Zuko were able to spend a lot of time on the front lines, but even then, Zuko spent a lot of time at the Palace, learning everything he could. She missed everyone greatly when they were apart, but it was working. People had been bonded by shared grief and fear; there were places in the Earth Kingdom that would never recover, and those stood as a testament to what a madman was willing to do to them all. They had no Avatar to dump their hopes on, and so they fought. Finally.
"Thank you for waiting."
Slowly, Zuko turned toward her, his smile brilliant, his face outlined by the rising sun, his eyes as golden as the sky. Her smile widened as she watched him, her heart doing too many things at once. She hesitantly took a few steps forward, not really wanting to disturb him.
"Happy birthday," Katara said as cheerily as she could.
She ducked back inside to grab the custards. Things had been so peaceful over the last few months that it was easy to become complacent, to think that this could be their lives forever. They'd been helping rebuild Ba Sing Se, fortifying the city again, and it had become a great stronghold for the resistance. For four years, they were a true rebellion, able to push back against Ozai's attempts at conquest and actually win, even if they suffered huge losses from time to time.
But in these lulls between battles, when she didn't need to be on the front lines, Katara tended to forget that they weren't still fighting a war. When she did forget, the guilt was never far behind; it felt wrong to go on living, to let the pain of losing someone so important to her fade away. She didn't want to feel happy. She absolutely did not. Moments of happiness were fine, but she refused to feel content with this life that they had. There was an end game, a final goal, and being a leader of the rebellion was not it. Moments like this were only a dream. They were fleeting. Reality was always at the edge of her mind.
"Katara?"
With a deep breath, Katara grabbed the desserts and poked her head back outside.
"Gifts!"
She forced a smile, even though she knew Zuko would see right through it, and the way he was frowning at her said he already had his suspicions. He took the desserts from her as she sat next to him on the grass. Their knees touched. From the corner of her eye, Katara watched Zuko inspecting the dessert, laughing quietly as he realized what it was.
"Compliments of Yina," she said, nudging his shoulder with hers.
"Does my uncle know I'm having dessert before breakfast?"
"Not unless you tell him."
Zuko used his breath of fire to crisp the top, the delightful smell of moon peaches and sugar filling the air. After having one, Katara knew immediately why Zuko had fallen in love with them. They were creamy and rich, and Yina could make them in any flavor, even chocolate, which was Katara's favorite. She accepted the dish Zuko handed her, watching as he slowly ate his, savoring every bite. When she smiled again, it was a true smile; the peaceful look he had during his mediations was back. He'd put his spoon down and was licking the inside of the dish and making little happy noises as he cleaned the dish out. When his was gone, he started eyeing hers.
"Get back," Katara said, leaning away from him, and putting a hand on his chest. "You ate yours."
"Well, you only brought me one—"
"You had three yesterday!"
"Today is a new day. Come on, Katara, you're letting it get cold."
They were laughing and struggling, Katara holding the custard way over her head, and she hadn't realized just how much they'd grown until Zuko easily took it from her, going "yoink" in a very Sokka way. She narrowed her eyes at him and pounced, pinning him to the ground with a knee in his chest, but before she could ground herself, he flipped them, pinning her underneath him. She made a startled noise, not having expected him to move her so easily, but she'd taken the custard back, even though, in this moment, it didn't seem to matter much who had it. They were breathing heavily, her heart racing. She begged her face not to betray her. There were still too many things that they needed to be, too many battles to fight.
"I was going easy on you," she said, the color rising in her cheeks.
"I know."
Katara licked her lips, feeling like she should say something, not sure if she should acknowledge the situation, not sure what she would say about it. Not sure what, if anything would come of this. Not sure if anything should.
"Oh, hello!"
Their heads snapped toward the sound. Sokka and Suki were poking their heads out the door, Suki's smile wider than it had any right to be, her hands clasped under her chin. Without the sun slightly blinding her, she could see that Zuko's face was red, too.
"What's going on—"
"We'll come back later," Suki interrupted, whacking Sokka in the shoulder and attempting to shove him back inside. "Breakfast is ready when you are."
"No, wait!"
They'd both yelled, tried to untangle themselves, falling over each other, making things worse, their faces even redder.
"There's nothing going on," she said.
"I just wanted the custard," he said.
Suki just nodded, dragging Sokka back inside and closing the door behind them.
There often wasn't much reason to celebrate. War was brutal and deadly, but none of them could deny the importance of reminding people just why they were fighting.
Fireworks exploded in the sky, and Zuko stood in the middle of the street, wearing a crown of flowers around his head, his own crown still firmly fixed in his topknot, the weight not nearly as heavy as it was when he'd first started wearing it. Zuko allowed himself a small smile. Progress, his uncle would call it. King Kuei and his bear came to stand beside him, Kuei clapping as another blast went off, sending green sparks into the sky. There was an odd, childlike joy to Kuei, and Zuko regarded the Earth King with some confusion.
"This is amazing," Kuei exclaimed, bouncing with excitement. "And to think I hadn't wanted to come back!"
It had been a struggle to find the wayward king, but the moment they had him back in the palace, Zuko wondered if the world wouldn't have been better off without him around. When they started to test Kuei's knowledge about ruling, the depth of Long Feng's corruption showed itself. Little by little, Kuei was becoming the leader the city needed, but it wasn't enough. Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. They could fight as hard as their bodies would allow, they could repel Ozai and win the war, but none of that would matter if there was still a weak link in the alliance. The Fire Nation would need a lot of help. All of their efforts would be wasted if Kuei couldn't pull through for them, their sacrifices would be for nothing. Aang…
Zuko sighed, unable to help the deep sadness in his heart, even as he watched people dance and sing and drink around the giant bonfire in the square in front of the palace. Everyone was wearing a crown of flowers, enjoying the beautiful late spring weather. Everything felt so alive. People passed him, shouting happy birthday, or that the war would be over soon, or long live the revolution, or any number of things that were supposed to be uplifting or encouraging.
"I can't believe so many people actually came," Kuei said, turning to him. "There are people from every nation, even the North Pole!"
"Yeah," Zuko said, not sure what else he really could say. "Yeah, it's nice that everyone's finally working together."
"Is that it?" Kuei turned to him, surprised. "It's your birthday, you should be happier! Celebrate!"
"He's right!" Sokka said, coming up beside him and tossing his arm around Zuko's shoulder. "Listen, buddy, we don't get many chances to celebrate like this, so enjoy it."
Members of the Southern and Northern Water Tribes brought out giant drums and set them up around the bonfire. The drumming started off softly at first, just a few drummers beating out a slow rhythm in deep tones that reverberated through the street. People started to gather around the bonfire. More drummers joined, adding in a faster beat, followed by a third set etching a sharp, cracking rhythm with their drumsticks. Sokka was saying something to him, but Zuko's mind started to wander when the dancers came out, and there was Katara, wearing traditional Water Tribe garb, her hair ringed with white flowers. She wasn't as practiced as some of the other dancers, but she had a power and grace that was all her own. He held his breath as the fire flickered golden over her skin, and when the women pulled the water to them, making it spin and twirl and form shapes in the air, Katara had no equal in her mastery of the element. Kuei was clapping again, saying how impressive all of this was.
"She's something else, isn't she?" Sokka said quietly, so that only Zuko could hear.
"Back off—"
"What?" Sokka was sounding too nonchalant, like he wasn't about to meddle in things. "All I'm saying is she's pretty awesome, right?"
Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why aren't you up there? Katara made time to learn the dance, why didn't you learn the drumming?"
"I wanted to, believe me, but Dad and I were on a raid when they started."
Sokka waved this off mumbling that he'll learn it next year, trying to redirect the conversation back to Katara, and Zuko never wanted to strangle his best friend more than he did then. They were in the middle of a war.
"Listen," Zuko finally said, turning away from the bonfire to look at Sokka. "Look, I…appreciate what you're trying to do—"
"Dude, I don't even think you know—"
"But we're fighting a war right now and there's a lot of work to do—"
"Oh man, you don't know, do you?"
The drums reached a crescendo, and Zuko turned to watch Katara's solo performance. She spun gracefully, the water moving so quickly it blurred, her every move hypnotic, sending the water in a different direction. She looked happy. Carefree.
"Look, all I'm saying is, don't forget to live."
"What?"
Zuko looked at Sokka, trying to ferret out what his friend was saying while still watching the performance. He didn't want to completely look away because Katara would be mad at him if he did, but more than that, he wanted to fix this moment in his mind. When the fights got too hard, or things looked hopeless, staring down a seemingly unending line of soldiers from his own nation, Zuko wanted to be able to recall this moment, to remember the peace and joy that waited them on the other side of war. Besides, how could he forget to live? It wasn't like he could forget to breathe or anything. And there were a lot of people counting on him, so it wasn't like he'd just forget all of his responsibility.
"Look, it's something Dad and your uncle were talking about," Sokka said. "The thing that'll piss Ozai off more than anything is that life continues. People aren't afraid of him, they aren't afraid of the Fire Nation. Hell, they're rallying behind you. Behind all of us."
Katara's solo was coming to an end, and she was smiling brilliantly, falling back in line with the other dancers as the drum beat slowed down. She seemed more confident, people applauding her and raising their cups to her, to them all. She was glowing.
"I'm going to marry Suki."
"What?"
Zuko ripped his attention away from the performance, fully focusing on Sokka, who was actively avoiding looking at his friend. Sokka shrugged, nudging a rock with his foot. He rubbed the back of his head.
"Yeah. I mean, probably not this year, we're just too busy, and in a few months we're going to push toward the colonies again, so, really, probably not anytime soon, but…"
"You're what?"
"Stop looking at me like that. What? You don't like Suki? I thought you liked Suki."
"No, I like Suki, she's great, that's great, you're great—"
"Stop saying great—"
"Married?"
Everyone was clapping and cheering as the performance came to an end, but Zuko could only stare at his best friend. Married. They were too young to be married, there was too much to do, it was too big of a risk just then, too much was still at stake. He started to protest several times, to tell Sokka that they should wait, that they could still die, any of them, at any moment, that there was still a possibility they might lose this war. Ozai had been strong enough to beat the Avatar. But he couldn't deny that Sokka and Suki were good for each other, and didn't they deserve happiness? They were working toward peace, and what better symbol of peace than them continuing to live their lives? What better way to prove that they weren't afraid than to fall in love and get married and have families? What better way to prove the strength of the rebellion?
"You don't think I should?" Sokka looked disappointed, his enthusiasm deflating. "I mean, like I said, it won't be this year, maybe. I probably won't even ask her until next year, but when you know, you just kinda know, you know? I can't imagine anyone else would put up with me the way she does. So…I don't know, we should just make it official?"
"No, I mean…" Zuko smiled, shaking his head. "You should. This is great. Wow. It's just…wow. Married. Congrats?"
Sokka laughed. "Don't congratulate me just yet. I still have to get the courage to go through with it."
The applause died away and Earth Kingdom musicians moved forward to join the Water Tribe drummers, the crowd dispersing to continue the festivities. Zuko slapped Sokka on the back, and the two moved out of the way as a group of revelers came through, pouring drinks for everyone they walked past. They stood in silence for a while, the world around them noisy enough, and Zuko looked for their family. He saw his uncle laughing with Toph over a pai sho board, pulling a few coins from his pocket and sliding them toward her. He knew that Yina wasn't one for parties; she was likely back at Kuei's palace, organizing the food and drink that would be sent out. Hakoda was drinking with his fellow tribesmen, Hau speaking quietly with the new Grand Secretariat, most likely about business and war plans. Suki was probably with Katara. Everyone seemed happy. Content. Willing to forget their troubles for the moment.
"I know you hate celebrating your birthday, but I'm glad your uncle insisted on this party."
Zuko nodded. Iroh did as much as he could to ensure the focus wouldn't be solely on him, and it seemed like the only people who really acknowledged his birthday was his family, which was fine. During his banishment, he hadn't heard much laughter. People were terrified, fearing every shadow, expecting death to be just around the corner. But this? This was different. The fighting was harder, the stakes were higher, but enough people were working together that they were finally able to make a difference. It would be too easy to go back to the way they had been, isolated and cowering, just waiting for Ozai to come for them and destroy them. Iroh, the White Lotus, Hakoda, Arnook, Kuei's Grand Secretariat, Ai, they all came together to plan this celebration. It was working better than fear to bridge the gap between them. Then there was the benefit of making sure Ozai knew they weren't afraid of him anymore, a stark contrast to the message he was desperately trying to send to them. The strength of the rebellion was no secret, and even though Ozai was doing his best to close off the Fire Nation, they still got news.
"If you need help planning something for Suki, let me know," Zuko said. "She'll be so happy."
"Thanks."
Suki was making her way toward them, and Zuko shooed Sokka toward her. They belonged together. Suki's smile was huge, her pace quickening the closer she got to them, Sokka's own smile just as large as hers. When they met, they hugged tightly, Suki resting her head on Sokka's shoulder. Zuko smiled sadly; he didn't think he knew anyone who loved as deeply as they did. It was good that they'd be together. Zuko wasn't jealous at all…
"I'll send Katara over—"
"No, Sokka, you don't—"
"Nonsense! Look, here she is, now."
Before he could protest, both Sokka and Suki were pushing the two of them together. Katara made a little startled noise, her hands on his shoulders, and the moment their eyes met, Zuko felt gangly and foolish, and he wished he could kick himself for blushing.
A/N: Sorry this took so long. Migraines and work destroyed my writing schedule. But hopefully I can get back on track. Hopefully this was worth the wait!