What was I thinking? Getting on a date with a Vampire?No it was not a date. It was just two friends meeting for no explicit reason. Or was it?
I was trying to make sense of what just happened. I had never felt that way before in my life.
While heading back to Amberwood my phone rang. It was Brayden.
"Hey" I aswered the phone, not really in the mood.
"Hey" he said. I heared the happiness in his voice and I felt bad. It was not fair to take it out on him. I smiled, because I once heared, that the dialog partner could here the difference in the voice.
"I was just thinking, if you want to join me for coffe?" he went on. How could I say no. After that day, coffee was the best thing, I could come up with right now. "Be right there" I answered and turned around to meet Brayden.
As I entered the cafe, and the awesmome smell of freshly brewed coffe hit me, my heart instantly felt a little lighter. Brayden was already waiting for me in a corner of the shop. I noticed to cups on the table and assumed, that one would be for me. I smiled at him and sat down. We just started dating and he gave me a shyly kiss on the cheek when I sat down. It was easy to talk to and comfortable. As we were talking, he moved closer to me and managed to put his arm around me as he was yawing. At this lame move I nearly rolled my eyes, but didn´t because I knew it would hurt him. While I was sitting there, only half listening to the words he spoke, I was wandering why I started to see him in the first place. He was nice, and as I said, it was easy to talk to him about literature, art and even school, but at the end I had to admit, that I probably just had been to kind to say no to our first date.
I noticed than, that Brayden leaned in to kiss me. I dind´t feel like kissing him that much but I thought he would be hurt, if I turned away, so I leaned in as well and our lips touched. Nothing. No fireworks, no butterflies, nothing. Brayden an me had kissed before, but only a few times and everytime it had been more than dissapointing. After reading all that books and watching all that movies about love and romance, I didn´t understand what all the fuzz was about. Was it me? Was I just uncapeable to feel affection? Or was it just the wrong pearson? Frustrated by this thought and unwilling to think more about that toppic, I ended the kiss before Brayden wanted to. I knew he would be to polite to ask me if anything was wrong, but I smiled at him saying sorry with me eyes.
"I´m just tiered" I excused myself. He smiled back, but I saw the disappointment in his eyes.
About 10 Minutes later I headed home. Leaving him with just a kiss on the cheek.
Soon after I went to bed and as I finally fell asleep, I found myself in Adrians livingroom. He had visited me in my dream before. The first time I completly freaked out. The magic surrounding me was just to much to take. Since then I got kind of used to it. It still wasn´t my favorite place to be, but I could manage. And after all, he only pulled me in one of those dreams, when it was absolutely important and he had to reach Jill as soon as possible.
Soon after realizing I was in a spirit dream, I realized as well, that I had to be in spirit dream with Adrian. My palms got sweaty and I hated me for it. I looked around me but couldn´t see him.
"Adrian?" I nearly whispered, instantly feeling stupid for it. I heared steps behind me and turned around. There he was standing infront of me with all his glory smiling at me. "What am I doing here?" I asked him.
"Color Sage? I like it" he said laughing. I looked down and saw me wearing exactly what I had put on when I went to bed. My grey pjama pants with the white dots and a pink tanktop. I blushed, not knowing what to think of that. I felt unpretty this afternoon but now I felt even more uncomfortable. I crossed my hands infront of my chest trying to look as cool as I could.
"Thanks" I said, not knowing what to respond. "What am I doing here?" I asked again.
"Well Sage" he said „I thought why wait till the next day, when we have the whole night". My head spon . Whats that suppose to mean? What was going to happen? Why the hell am I wearing this unflattering pants? „Time for what?" I asked unsure. He came a few steps closer to me and my heart started to bet faster. I could smell him now. I smelled his cologne and him. Just him. It was breathtaking.
No I told myself. He is a creature of the night, an evil vampire. He is wrong on so many levels and so sexy. Sexy? No Sidney get it together I chide myself.
He stod in front of me now. I looked into his eyes and I saw a glaze in his eyes. His hand came my way and soon there after I felt my hand in his. In his eyes I saw, that he was not sure how I would react. And neither did I. How could I. I knew that it was absolutely wrong, but it felt so damn right.
"Sage" he began " I´m sorry for what happened this afternoon. That was stupid. I just didn´t know what to do. You make me feel... so confused" he said. Not taking his eyes of me for one second.
I blushed aigan. What does confuse mean? Could it be, that he felt the same way I did? In my heart sa flame started to burn.
"You are so damn beautiful, you know that?" he whispered, while gently rubbing his thumb over my hand leaving it burning on every inch he touched.
"Glad you like my pajama" I whispered astonished about my ready wit. He laught out loud.
"No. Thats not what I meant. I´m talking about you Sydney".I dind´t know what to say to that and I felt my cheeks blushing even more. I looked at our hands. Fitting perfectly into each other. Than I looked him in the eyes again. And than it happend.
Adrian took my head in his hands and came even closer. My feet felt like pudding but I managed to keep standing. I closed my eyes beeing 100% aware of every inch that was covered by his hands. Butterflies where racing in my stomach and I felt his lips gently touching mine. It had been only for one second and ended so soon, that I wasn´t even sure, if my mind just made it up.
He looked at me when I opened my eyes. Unsure if he should go on. This was the moment when I just couldn´t take it anymore. I pulled him closer to me and our lips touched again. I felt the wall behind me and more important him. Adrian. Adrian kissing me, touching and stroking my cheeks. Holding on to my head, while I found my hands in his messy hair. It was like fireworks. The World around me vanished. It was like all the books and movies, only 1000 times better. I gasped when I felt his tounge on the entrance of my mouth and I welcomed it with my own. I noticed, that his hands where on my back now. Moving gently to my waist, where they stayed for a few seconds, until they found their place on my face again. My breath came heavily, as I lost myself in him. His scent, his lips, his touch and the electricity between us it was nearly more than I could bear. A few minutes later we stoped kissing and I instantly missed his lips on mine. I heared him breath heavily, while he was kissing a trail down my throat, still holding me in a gentle yet strong embrace. And than it hit me. I was kissing a vampire.
"Adrian" I managed to whisper as he worked his way back to my earlob.
"Hmm" was all he responded.
"We can´t" I sighed. He stopped imediatelly looking at me with unbelieve. "
What?" he said.
"Adrian I can´t. It´s wrong". I whispered, looking into his eyes. He looked like I just had slapped him.
"What? I mean you started...what?" I saw the confusion in his eyes and I was sure I reflected the same mixed feelings, so I looked down. I wanted him to go on. I wanted to loose myself in his arms and in his kisses forever. I wanted him to touch me and make me feel everything and nothing. But I knew that it couldn´t be.
"You are a vampire" I said.
"Well thanks for the reminder Sage" he said taking a step back. I instantly regretted my words seeing him moving away from me but I knew it was for the best. "We are not ment to be together" I went on.
"It´s wrong"but it feels so right „I´m sorry...".He looked at me unsure what to say. He Brushed through his hair und sat down on the couch. I was left standing there in the middle of the room, feeling like an idiot.
"You kissed me" he said, not looking at me. "I might started it, but you took control and I thought you liked it. It sure sounded like it". I blushed. Not sure what exactly he was reffering to. Did I say something during our kiss?
"I know" I said quite. Not sure how to explain myself. "I did... I mean I liked it..." „You did more than like it" he said, trying to catch my eyes. I tried to avoid his gaze.
"It doesn´t matter Adrian. I´m a Alchemist. I can´t get involved with a vampire. I just can´t".
"Than tell me you didn´t feel anything" He nearly exclaimed. And I couldn´t. As much as I wanted to deny it. As much as I wanted to tell him, that it was disgusting, I couldn´t. It had been the best thing that ever happened to me.
"Let me go Adrian" I whispered. I felt ashamed of myself, letting my feelings get the best of me. "Please. I need to leave" I plead. On the one hand, the whole situation was just to much for me and on the other hand, I just wasn´t sure, if I could stay strong.
Adrian just sat on the couch covering his eyes with both hands, slowly shaking his head in disbelieve.
A few seconds later, everything got blury and I found myself in my own bed. I felt incredibly lonely. I still felt the tingly feeling on my lips, where he had kissed me and I could still see his hurt eyes after I told him, that I couldn´t do it. I wanted to call him and tell him, that I was wrong and that I wanted to be back in his arms kissing him, but I also knew, that this was the right decision. A few tears formed in my eyes and for the first time in a very long time, I cried myself to sleep. Feeling, that I had lost something beautiful I just got.