Gosh I feel like all I ever say is sorry. I know I promised to update more regularly because the chapters would be shorter but I haven't had much motivation to write or the time for that matter. I will try to do better. Hope you haven't all lost interest in this story and will keep reading and reviewing. Hope you enjoy this latest chapter

Arya

My head hurt. I could feel it and I fought the slumber that was swiftly receding. Sleep was safe, I was alone, untouched.

"Arya? Are you awake?"

I heard a deep male voice talking to me and I flinched, even in my semi consciousness. My eyelids fluttered, batting what felt like gales of wind against my cheeks.

"Arya?"

The voice spoke again.

This time I couldn't fight it and my eyes opened of their own volition. Blue eyes were staring at me; Tully eyes. Most of my siblings had inherited our mother's colouring and Robb was no exception. For a second, a brief second I wanted to cry and climb into my brother's arms but that version of me was long dead, buried beneath the snows that winter had brought. I hardened my heart, this was just a footnote in my journey and I would not allow sentimentality to sway me from my vision.

"Arya sweet sister, you have come home," Robb whispered to me.

He reached out to me but I flinched away from his raised hand. Logic told me my blood brother would not hurt me but fear did not go hand in hand with logic and I had not been touched kindly in a very long time.

"Sweetheart you know I would never hurt you, you have nothing to fear from me," I heard him croon, his voice soft and filled with sadness. I watched him hesitantly. Instinct and self-preservation warred within me battling for high ground like two armies fighting over a piece of land. Land in this case was my heart; an icy frontier protected by a wall of bitterness and indifference that I had erected to keep out the memories that could tumble it down. With my memories and emotions locked out my heart had lost the ability to care, to feel. Raw, base emotions like fear and shock and anger were all I was able to feel now, a mere shell of the grander emotions I had known as a child. Looking at my brother now, I wisely understood the power he possessed, the capability he had of hurting me and this I could not allow no matter that deep down underneath the decision to remain unmoved by his presence I wanted to jump into his arms and be a child again. Summoning up all of my will power and casual indifference I had built over the years I relaxed my features, wiping away all trace of shock and wistfulness.

"How long have I been asleep?" I asked, ignoring his words of comfort.

"Less than a day, you aren't injured as far as we can tell, just exhausted by the looks of it," Robb said, watching me with a furrow in his brow and a frown on his lips.

I struggled to sit up and he reached to help me but again I instinctively flinched. I saw the hurt briefly cross his face but he covered it quickly.

"I need to go," I said simply, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. It was then I took note of my surroundings. My heart skipped a beat as I saw the stone floors, the small single bed I had spent as much time escaping as I had sleeping. I took in the small nightstands that had held very little sentimental things even as a carefree child. The world had been too exciting to spend my time cooped up in a small room. Winterfell had been too exciting. I turned back to find Robb watching me surprise on his face. Oh how I wanted to reach out to him, give him what he wanted from me but I couldn't, I didn't have it left in me to give.

"Go? But you just got here, I'm not letting you go," he told me.

I glanced sharply at him. He wasn't going to let me go? Did he really think he could stop me? I had no desire to hurt my brother but he wasn't keeping me here. I had things to do and people to kill. It was the only way I knew how to reclaim some semblance of who I used to be.

"I have to."

"Why? Why Arya, why do you have to leave us, leave me?" he pleaded.

"I still have my list," I replied instantly knowing I'd made a mistake. Nobody could know about my plan, not even my own blood.

"What list?"

"Nothing, forget it, I have to go, that's all you need to know."

"Arya."

"No Robb, I'm leaving, I wasn't supposed to be here, just forget you ever saw me," I told him. I launched myself off the bed and started for the door. I got all of three steps before I felt arms wrap around my waist. Instant panic consumed me. The feeling of being restricted and confined blinded me from everything around me, even to the person who held me, one who would not hurt me. I kicked and struggled, deaf to the soothing words being whispered.

"Arya, relax, Arya, ARYA," whispered words became a shout as my struggles increased. I felt exhaustion begin to creep over my muscles but I fought on. I could not let myself be captured, caged in. Finally I felt the arms loosen and with a final push I freed myself and made for the door, realising only then that I hadn't gotten loose of my own, Robb had released me because he'd locked the door and was now standing in front of it, his chest heaving with adrenalin. There was something that looked rather like regret on his face but I was blind to it. All I was aware of was that my brother had tried to cage me like he too knew I was the animal that I knew myself to be. I braced myself for his anger.

"What happened to you little one?" he sounded sad. There was something I vaguely recognised to be love in his voice but it was foreign to me. I looked away, hiding from his words; those secrets, the secrets of my past weren't coming out any time soon. I heard him sigh and I turned back to him.

"I can't let you go, Arya, I have no wish to keep you here against your will but winter is no place for a child let alone my sister and if I have to hold you here under lock and key in order to protect you then I will."

My eyes were fixed on him as my ears heard his words. Never mind the loving tone the sentence was voiced in, never mind the look of sheer pain and regret on his face, all I could hear was lock and key and keeping me against my will. I began to tremble in earnest. When I had seen my brother sitting in the head chair of Winterfell, I had not envisioned that I would be forced to stay. I had stupidly thought he would let me be on my way. An old expression briefly flashed to mind, something about hell and good intentions. I looked back at Robb; did he think to keep me in this room? I had spent my childhood getting out of a locked room after many a day of punishment for some prank I'd pulled or some task not done. Now my motivation was stronger, my determination unmatched.

"Do you mean to lock me away then?" I asked.

"No Arya, I cannot do that to my own sister, but no man here will allow you past the gates, you won't be able to leave the safety of the keep's walls but you will have free reign of whatever you need within them, maybe in time you will realise I'm doing this out of love and not to make life miserable for you," with that, he unlocked the door and left. I stood staring at the closed door, already plotting how to get out. I didn't think it would take me long; after all I'd had lots of practice.