I am glad you all are enjoying the story so far. Reviewers, I really appreciate your input and comments and I hope you continue to give your own personal feedback. Also thank you to the people who have added the story to their alert or favorites list, I appreciate you reading this.

This one is slightly shorter than the others, but that's just because I wanted to get out this part ASAP.

And I try my best to edit and catch typos, but if you see any sorry about that!

Alright, so you know how this goes—aaand action!

"The Pretense"

xXx

I can't sleep now, no, not like I used to. I can't breathe in and out like I need to
It's breaking ice now to make any movement.
What's your vice? You know that mine's the illusion.

xXx

Thomas Wolfe once said, "Y' can't go home again."

Well…'dat be great fo'ol' American novelist Wolfe. The Old Remy's initial thought: no home means no worries about nostalgia, a search fo' self or a search fo' 'de comforts of some commercialized home. Jus' bein' tied down in general-Remy never needed it.

Honestly, not 'dat long ago, 'dat different Remy would have been fine wit' Wolfe's somewhat depressing philosophy, an' the independent loner of a response t' such a philosophy would have been expected, considering who I used t' be. But I ain't d' same. I will never be d' same.

Of course, dat's also what Wolfe's character George Webber came to realize, 'dat things just don' go in reverse, "You can't go back home to your family, back home to your childhood ... back home to a young man's dreams of glory and of fame ... back home to places in the country, back home to the old forms and systems of things which once seemed everlasting but which are changing all the time — back home to the escapes of Time and Memory." According to Wolfe,it just doesn't work in 'de way of reverse. Y' can never go back.

I have done my fair share of readin' and studyin' literature back in d' day. 'De guild would not hear of any of 'dere family members not getting' some worthwhile education. So I know my stuff. For the most part. Some junk jus' don' stick, and as for d' other stuff, it can really hit hard or hit home…

"…back home to 'de escapes of Time and Memory". He said y' can't go back to 'dat. An yet here I stand defying 'dis writer, because I don' go a single day not thinkin' about time an' memories wit' her. I go back to 'dem every day.

So, "Y'can't go home again", Eh Tommy boy? Well y' know what? 'De closest I ever be t' a home was when I was wit' 'dis girl. And between me and y', Mr. American novelist, I'd take 'dat girl each an' every time over my family ties, my childhood days, any dreams of glory and fame, over a building with all 'de essentials of life, 'de open and wide countryside and over 'de systems 'dat once seemed everlasting…but are inevitably changin' all the time. She was my family

xXx

Remy Lebeau had not moved. He sat outside on the outdoor swing that was on the guild's mansions front porch. There was a bottle of bourbon and a small glass that was set on a small wooden table beside him. Remy knew the dark was coming and the sun would go down on yet another day, another day of feeling wrong and incomplete. He had looked about this lifeless during the whole course of one year. But even he had a way to semi-cope. Sarcasm, meaningless flirting, and a cocky attitude made for a tough barrier that no one would ever dare try and break through during his time of life post-Rogue. He still could not believe that he called her apartment. He currently flipped and tossed his cellular device up and down with his one hand, not letting the phone drop to the ground. He knew exactly what possessed him to do it, to finally dial those numbers and make contact. The torment of not being with the girl that he had grown so accustomed to having in his life was hitting the brink. Remy Lebeau was no idiot, it did not take a genius to figure that he had made a mistake…not being there with her now, not staying, not fighting hard enough for what he wanted, for what he needed. He was wondering if he made the right decision to leave and cut himself out of her life completely. After what he did, it seemed like it was the only solution that would make life easier for her, to just step aside and get the hell out of the way. That, and he was so very good at running.

Hearing Kitty on the other line earlier made everything more real for Remy. It was a reassurance that all was still in motion in Rogue's life and that Kitty and Rogue still lived together and she was not alone. Not much was said, but Remy had impeccable skills when it came to detecting background noise. The two girls still went through a morning ritual of the morning rush. Remy was a thief, he had trained ears and he heard the music playing in the background. She was obviously in the bathroom showering. It had apparently been an "Offspring" kind of a morning. The fact that it was after seven and "The Offspring" was playing meant she was probably running late. If she slept in that meant she was in a bad mood, and waking up late meant she needed coffee, and lots of it or Kitty was about to get bombarded with irrational complaints.

She used to get just as bent out of shape whenever he would try to wake her up as well. They had their own "morning ritual"…

xXx

She could smell spices, cigarettes, and a soothing, calming smell of cologne that for an indescribable reason reminded her of a summers evening. Mmm. His scent. He was up already, and she knew it. She slowly cracked her eyes open to see his own red on black orbs staring back at her.

"Bonjour Chère" she semi groaned. He was crouched down next to her bed and was level with where her head rested on the pillow. He kissed her forehead. Mmm…vanilla and the smell of her perfume that for an indescribable reason always reminded him of an autumn evening. God, she had him. She had him good. If they were going to strip everything down for what it was worth, she had him at hello…or rather "What do you want", which he took as hello.

"Knew that if Remy stayed here lookin' at y' long enough y' were bound to wake up. Come on, start the day, time to get up."

"Go away."

How cute, she was being difficult.

"Let's go ma Chère, up!" dissatisfied by her lack of enthusiasm to move, he removed the sheets from her horizontal form causing her to curl up. This resulted in her bringing her legs up and close to her chest, her figure resembling that of a fetal position.

"Nuuughmm…"

"That don' mean nothin' girl. Come on, time to get up." He knelt down once again and pushed a few white strands of hair out of her face. She shook her head lightly and continued to doze off back into slumber.

He gave her a small and soft kiss on her nose that got a small smile from her in return.

He watched the edges of her lips turn upward, her mouth making the "Mmm" sound that he loved so much.

"Aw, y' like dat Chère?" he came in closer to the crook of her neck and began to nuzzle her continuously. "Cuz Remy like's it too."

"Do whatever you want to meh, just don't wake meh up." She turned to the side ignoring his attempt to bring her to life.

As tempting as that offer was coming from his girlfriend, who was in a slight sleep-induced coma, He only stuck to the simple wakeup call tactics. He would get her back later…and she most definitely will not want to be asleep during that. Caught up in his own head, Remy was grinning like a fool but snapped out of it when he saw she was as good as asleep once again.

"Alright Chère, Remy knew y' was goin' t' be difficult. So he was a good boyfriend an' brought y' something that y' quite frankly can't resist."

She heard his steps as he made his exit from the room, but for only a moment long enough to grab something from outside. As he made his way back she could immediately smell the irresistible aroma of coffee grinds, the scent bitter, roasted and strong from where she laid. He sat next to her on the bed and moved the four dollar and fifty cent latté around her nose, intoxicating her senses further.

She was still buried in her bed, but a hand was outreached waiting for the beautiful god sent drink. Funny, Remy usually had the same thoughts towards his bourbon.

"Gimme."

"That is no way t' thank y lovin' boyfriend. The man in y' life that brought y this beautiful gift." She smiled back at him, hardly wanting to dispute anything he threw at her at this hour. Finally, she made her way to sit up and he handed her the coffee cup then watched as she slowly drank her coffee.

She leaned against him resting her head on his shoulder.

"Mm, you know the way to mah heart at 6am. Thanks sugah."

"Anythin' fo' Remy's girl. Now dat y' speakin' full sentences, y' can get y'self in 'dat shower an' get ready fo' the day."

His comment did not phase her.

"Don't wanna." She continued sipping her coffee. Remy rolled his eyes and knew it was time to bring out the big guns and go for the target. If he was going to get his way he had to threaten her one and only prized possession at 6am.

"Here, let Remy have some." he gestured to her coffee, and watched as her hold tightened, Ah, he clearly hit a chord with her. This woman seriously had no intention of sharing the hot beverage.

She looked down protectively at the cup and then at him.

"…but it's mine."

That was a threat all within itself.

"Y' can't be serious, Remy's the one who got if for y'. Let 'im have a little." He reached for it and she pulled away. Excellent, he was beginning to get her revved up.

"Get your own!" Oh man, this was awesome she was getting overly defensive and feisty over her coffee. Right on schedule too.

"Remy did have his own. But, the fact that y' won't let him have any now only makes him want some of yours more."

"What are you two years old?"

"Give it-"

"No!"

"Fine, den' Remy'll will take it by force—"

"Back off—"

"Remy warned you!"

He swooped down in her direction but quicker then she moved all morning, she leaped off her bed, made a mad dash into the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

"It's mine, you can't have it! Now get out of here!"

Remy only grinned with satisfaction on the other side of the door.

"Haha. Hey Chère, while y' in dere might as well shower an' prep y'self for the day seein as y' up an' functioning."

There was no response at first but finally she answered.

"You're a jerk." He could hear her mumble on the other side inaudibly.

Funny, but this is how he would get her out of bed almost every morning.

xXx

…He experienced frustration, pain, confusion and doubt. Remy's thoughts of yet another day without having what he once had echoed through his mind, 'It be another day. Another hour. Another minute. Another second. An' I be doin' what I always do. Wanderin' around in my head, havin' myself some bourbon. Kickin' myself in 'de gut jus' trying t' make sense of all 'dis. You'd 'tink 'dat 'dis gets old after a years' worth of time, but I let myself in on a secret—it doesn't.'

Things were always…hard with the two of them. Their relationship did not come easy, they had to work at it. He joined the X-men at twenty one and he was twenty three years old when she finally admitted to liking him. Two years he had pestered the girl and was compelled to be at her side at every given moment. He finally got under that hard exterior of hers. She said yes to being his girl and he was thrilled. The first year they had been a couple Rogue still struggled with control at times, like their relationship, it did not come easy. He could tell that it really got to her at times. But she pushed through and got the full control she worked so hard for, something they both were hesitant about. From then on they slowly but surely became physical. They did not exactly function as a normal couple did. They fought sometimes, on some days a little and on other days a lot, but they always had gotten over themselves and their prominent differences. She was always so closed off and kept everything close within the vest. He was always being short on certain subjects, never giving a full answer at times, and making her lash out on him and vice versa. Yes, they had their moments of temperamental flair, but no soon after were they making amends, finding themselves magnetically pulled together. He knew she was something special, something all of his own that he never had before…but he did not have his spunky southerner around anymore. It drove him over the edge not knowing anything about her anymore.

How the hell was she? Was she okay? Was she hurting? What's going on with her? God, it killed him. It killed him not to know. Knowing the way Rogue was when going through something rough, he could only guess she was evasive and deeply hurting, probably just acting like she was okay. He wanted her. He needed her. There was no way he was getting by without her. He would never forgive himself if he did not go back. He had no idea what life was going to be like if he headed back…but it had to be better than what he was currently experiencing. That consisted of gut wrenching feelings of sorrow, regret, pack after pack of cigarettes, and a whole hell of a lot of bourbon.

'But y' could hurt her…y' could hurt her more den' y already did, jus' by bein' there…'

What the hell was he doing? Keeping his distance, living on a possible prayer that maybe this is better for her? Forget it. No more. If anything he needed to see her, talk to her, anything. He did not expect to have her want anything to do with him, but as long as he could just see her. Try to figure out what he could not figure out or piece together about that night they were together. Forget this "I don't care" attitude. So long apathy, he could take no more of it.

Remy stood up in a defiant manner, "Mon Dieu. I can't do 'dis no more." He breathed out raking his hands through his hair.

When Remy thought of Thomas Wolfe's words "You can't go home again", all he could hear in his own head was, "You can't have Rogue again." And Remy Lebeau was never one for taking orders.

"Screw y' Thomas Wolfe."

I don't walk right, not like I used to
There's a jump in my step as I rush to see you
I could be happy here as long as you're near to me
As long as you're close to me

xXx

In the X-Men: The Animated Series episode "Days of Future Past - Part 1", Rogue and Gambit give a copy of the novel to Beast while visiting him in jail. Beast recalls Thomas Wolfe and fondly describes the book as an old favorite. Gambit remarks that Beast is easy to shop for, saying "just buy the books that have the most dust on them." I thought bringing in Remy's take on Thomas Wolfe would be cool.

So we finally enter the mind of Remy Lebeau, not to mention a small flashback. Looks like he's heading back to see someone he has not seen for a year…wonder how that's going to go.

Anyways, any thoughts, comments? Hope you liked Remy entering the story more and more. Not as long as the others but the chapters will begin to get longer in time.

Please Review-

-Lebs