Chapter 3- Doubt

Hi guys, it's been a while but i'm back. I'm hoping to finish this post before i get busy again, so i hope regular updates on this story for a while. Anyhoo, here's another one, i hope you still remember where we left off. I hope you enjoy and give your feedback. would love to hear from you.

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What loneliness is more lonely than distrust?

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"I need…I need to get out of here. I need to talk to you." Danny said, out of breath.

"Ok, ok…do you want to go to the hospital.? You don't look too good …"

"No no no just…just out, in the car maybe…I don't know…"

"Ok, ok let's go." Steve said, leading him out of the room where Five 0 and HPD were busy compiling evidence, the team may have seen them discreetly leave the room and figured Danny was a little more disturbed with the scene than he had first let on. The vic was someone he knew yet again, murdered just after a week of his friend's murder, same style, same MO. If that wasn't disturbing, they didn't know what was. This all but spelt out that the killer was circling Danny, closing in. And they were all a little apprehensive about who was to follow next if they didn't get this killer now. Danny was most probably the next target, or any one of them.

Steve got into the driver's seat of the Camaro while Danny got onto the passenger seat, as usual, but they were not going to drive anywhere. They were just going to talk, away from too many eyes.

Steve waited for Danny to get his equilibrium, he had been hyperventilating by the time they left the building and Steve was guessing he was having a panic attack. But now he was calming down. Steve waited for him to start talking, giving him room and space to get it together.

The whole thing was running through Danny's mind now, how he had woken up with no memory of where he had been the previous night. Twice now this had happened to him and twice a person he knew was found dead right after. It was suspicious, he was suspicious of himself. How much more Steve, if he told him? If he told him everything he knew so far. How he had woken up on a beach where his friend was found dead the same morning, and how he had no recollection of the previous night. How he had woken up at his house his morning with a shirt missing a button, which same button, he was positive, was the one found at the crime scene this morning in the blood of a girl he supposedly knew but had no reconciliation of how or when. Danny was suspicious of himself; how would Steve take it? Looking at him now, his concerned face, Danny was getting scared to see that look replaced by that of horror and suspicion if Steve put two and two together. He just didn't know if he could survive seeing that look on Steve's face, directed at him. No way. And he could not even begin to think of how he would breathe to see that same look on Rachel's face. What about Grace? How would she survive in College with a father who is branded a serial killer? Were these two even the only people he had killed so far, without knowing? What about Charlie? How will he grow up with his dad in jail for murder? His whole Ohana, cops. No ordinary cops either, five-0. Steve might be a bit blinded when it came to his best friend, but his other friends might not be. Which would only be right, because he was a murderer and justice had to be served. He just…, he didn't want to put them in the position of putting handcuffs on him and lead him to prison, they couldn't take it, especially Steve. And now Danny was sweating, his mind was all over the place. He couldn't tell him. Not everything. At least not all that he could recollect and put together himself.

"Danny, talk to me. What are you thinking?" Steve inquired, still concerned.

"Uh… I just…I don't know man, this whole thing is starting to feel like…"

"Like the killer is closing in on you?" Steve said. "I promise you buddy, I won't let him get near you or your family. In fact, I'm thinking of putting you, Rachel and the kids in protective custody until we can figure this thing out. We're going to get this guy but in the meantime I need you safe." Steve said earnestly.

"Ok, that's one way of looking at it." Danny mumbled.

"What?"

"I woke up on the beach, Steve. The morning you found Ben's body; I woke up on the beach."

"What do you mean?" Steve asked confused.

"Exactly that. I woke up on beach with no idea how I got there. I got to my house to find everything was in order, but I was late for work. That's when you couldn't get any response from me on my phone. And when I got to work…"

"Are you serious?!" Steve asked, now a little (Offended) "And you didn't tell me? Danny what the hell are you saying? Did something happen to you? Did somebody hurt you or…?"

"I don't know alright?! I don't know!" Danny yelled in frustration. "I just…found myself on the beach with no recollection, whatsoever, of how I got there." Danny raked his head with his hands, a sign of his frustration, messing up his hair.

"Whoa, backup a bit, that was a week ago, Daniel. Why didn't you tell me?" Steve said angrily.

"I forgot! Ok? I don't know, I got to work, and you guys were all so worried about me missing and then there was Ben's death, I just…I forgot." Danny sighed. "I seem to be doing that a lot lately", he mumbled.

"What, the frustrated, constant sighing or the forgetting?" Steve mocked.

"Both I guess. The latter." Danny said. "And…" He paused.

"And?" Steve prompted.

"And it's not the first time…"

"You woke up on the beach without any memory before?" Steve asked in outraged alarm.

"I …well more or less…" Danny said in frustration.

"Jeez Daniel…!"

"Not…not that drastic, at least the beach thing was the first time, before that it had only been chunks of memory loses that I really wasn't all that concerned about. Until I woke up on the beach, of course."

Steve sighed in despair. "You realize how dangerous this is, right? How could you not tell me something like that Danny? What the hell were you thinking?!"

"Well, I wasn't thinking all that well Steven, apparently I've gone crazy. Stop yelling at me!"

"I'm not yelling at you." Steve said, his voice still raised.

"Please," Danny said dismissively, raking his hands in his hair again, leaning on the dash. "I'm sorry, ok. I just…didn't think about it with Ben's murder and all that, up until…up until I did it again this morning."

"This morning? When I called you this morning and you sounded…"?

"Yeah. Your call woke me up, and I was sleeping on my couch with no idea what date it was or how I had ended up sleeping on the couch." Danny said.

He was looking at Steve now, seeing the wheels of his mind spinning and he waited for him to get the clue. To point a finger and say, 'hey so, could you be a sleep walking serial killer?' He knew Steve would never accuse him but …when the evidence was there and it all turned out to be true, what could he do? He didn't want to put Steve in such a position. Danny had to somehow prepare Steve for the possibility of him being the killer because to Danny there was no other explanation. And Danny was sure the evidence in that room would come pointing back at him, including the button. Could he tell Steve about the button? Should he tell him about the button and see Steve's trust in him shatter? At that he panicked. He couldn't, he just couldn't. Steve was going to figure it out himself soon enough anyway, he could spare himself that look of horror and in distrust in Steve's eyes. At least for now.

Steve sighed again with frustration, hurt that Danny had left him out on something so important. Didn't he realize by now that his life was in danger? God, the killer had gotten this close to him if what Danny was telling him was anything to go by, which it was. How did someone wake up on a beach without any idea how he got there and not tell him about it?! Especially in light of a possible serial killer case, which was now a confirmed fact with this second kill. How could he just brush something like that aside? Danny needed to go see a doctor pronto, and after that Steve was putting him in protective custody with his family until they got this killer.

"You need to see a doctor. You need a psych eval, now Daniel." Steve said with a serious face that brooked no argument.

"I hear you. I did see my Doctor a number of times before this… before it all escalated to this, back when it was just anxiety…"

"Anxiety."

"Yeah, and then later, little memory slips. I thought, maybe side effects from the meds he had prescribed but…he said they had no such effect, they are standard issue, over the counter type, and he said he would look into it, but it's not the meds. I haven't seen him again since, because after the beach incident, it didn't happen again, until this morning."

"I'll take you to the Doctor…"

"No, you've got a case Steve…"

"No way I'm letting you out of my sight now. There is a killer on the loose clearly after you and I'm just supposed to…?"

"You've got a murder on the loose, and one man short." Danny said, indicating himself and grimacing at the pan, clearly not intended and Steve would have laughed or teased him about it had the situation not been so dire. "I'll go see my doctor, right now, I promise. And I can take care of myself, you forget, I'm five 0." Danny said, lightly, with a cajoling smile.

"I don't feel good about this." Steve said, with misgiving.

"I know, but I can take care of myself, and you need to be hands-on this scene. Besides, I don't think I'm in the right frame of mind to be working today, so I'll go see the doctor then straight home. I'll sleep and try to remember some things if I can. I'll call you when I get home. Now get out and let me drive my own car for today." Danny said.

Steve wasn't budging.

"Look," Danny looked at him earnestly, a kind of intensity in his eyes, "I need you to find the truth. I need…I need to know the truth, alright? I need you on this to bring whoever it is that is doing this to Justice. Bring the killer to justice Steven, no matter who it is."

Steve, more than anything, wanted to protest, but there was this desperate look in Danny's eyes that said he hadn't even processed this for himself yet. He needed time alone and following him everywhere or putting someone on him just now would be the exact opposite of what he needed right now. Steve cursed his ability to read his friend so well, but he did, and he just could not ignore it. Steve needed to ease on the rope a little bit and let Danny try and figure this out for himself. Danny should not be left alone but he could take care of himself, no doubt. However, in his mind frame of 'forgetfulness', waking up on the beach with no memory? Steve really could not just let him be on his own right now. Steve was torn between wanting to protect his friend and giving him back a little bit of his dignity. But Danny was right, Steve thought, after having reached a very difficult decision, the case needed all hands-on deck if they had a hope of finding this killer before he got to Danny or someone else close to him. Danny can take care of his own and Steve and team had to make sure they got the killer in time. Danny needed his space to get his bearing here. Steve could be a mother hen, but he really needed to give Danny his space to think. So, he relented, getting out of the car and watched Danny drive off leaving him standing there with plenty thoughts of misgiving. Should he have done that? Should he have let him go on his own like that?

Too late, the Camaro was already disappearing behind the curve. Danny was out of sight now. Steve sighed and walked back into the hotel building to carry on with the scene and whatever else they could gather for a lead on their suspect.

CSU would be coming up with results of DNA and all the prints in the room would have been processed by now, hopefully there would be a clue as to who their killer was.

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1) There is no such thing as paranoia , your worst fears can come true at any moment.

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See you in a bit

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