Thanks all you guys who've left such great reviews! I'm glad my randomness and love for Axel and Roxas is appreciated. Well, here's the next part, so enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own the Organization, Kingdom Hearts, Fall Out Boy, or any of the rigths to the songs that Demyx sings.
PART 3--Cruel and Unusual Punishment, Proudly Brought to You by Vexen
"My bologna has a first name, it's O-S-C-A-R! My bologna has a second-"
"Demyx, do shut up," Luxford growled as he laid a card down on the table before him. Xigbar, directly opposite, muttered something in agreement as he took his turn in their card game. The Melodious Nocturne pouted and strummed quietly in the corner.
"You guys are no fun," he said finally, breaking the silence.
"Thank you," they responded in unison.
Undaunted, number IX continued. "Roxas and Axel always have fun. Why can't you two be more like them?"
The Gambler of Fate pretended to ponder this. "Hmmm…a sugar-addicted teen with ADD, or a twenty-something weasel with gravity-defying hair…"
Xigbar rolled his eyes. "Demyx, there are different kinds of 'fun'. There's the safe kind, which we prefer to take part in, and then there's the 'fun' which involves a lot of running, throwing caution to the wind, and facing the consequences."
"Consequences? Since when-"
Numbers VIII and XIII chose to portal in at that very moment, arriving out of breath and sporting several icicles.
"Vexen. Tried. To-" Roxas panted, then shook his head. "It's too gruesome!"
Bored, the number XI took his turn. His playmate growled in defeat.
"Hello?" Axel called once he had managed to catch his breath. "Don't you two care?"
"Nope."
"Not really."
"We need your help! Vexen's after us because of what happened last week," Number XIII exclaimed, referring to his and the pyro's quest for the awesome Organization XIII Youtube video ever (and though that failed, the one Larxene shot had almost a million hits already).
"Fascinating," Luxford replied, shuffling cards. "Play again?" he asked his companion.
"I think not. Why don't you-"
"He's playing solitaire!" the mullet-haired crooner made an attempt to revive the Clay Aiken remake.
"DEMYX!"
Ten minutes later, the two run-aways were too busy emptying cupboards to notice a certain Savage Nymph behind them.
"Whatcha doin'?"
Roxas eeped and dropped a box of Crunchy Nuggets. Axel ignored her for the moment, stuffing some assorted snack cakes and cans of Dr. Pepper in a backpack.
"Let me guess: you're finally leaving the Organization?" She couldn't keep the hopefulness out of her voice.
"No, we're going into hiding. Vexen's after us, and we need somewhere safe to crash."
Larxene began to chow down on a cupcake. "Like where?"
"Axel was thinking your room!" Roxas piped up.
Chunks of the sweet treat flew out of number XII's mouth in surprise. Annoyed, she wiped her frosting-covered mouth with her sleeve.
"Well, Axel better think again."
"Oh, c'mon, Larxy!"
The blonde's eyes began to twitch. LARXY?! VIII laughed nervously and threw the bag containing the food over his shoulder.
"Look at the time…see ya later, Larxene!"
To put it into old English terms, they hauld-eth tail-eth.
Vexen rushed into the Superior's room, making sure to look as reverent and peaceful as possible. When Xemnas rolled his eyes, he took that as a sign to begin.
"Roxas and Axel are missing!"
"And you're worried? How touching."
"No…they refuse to be punished."
Number I fought the overwhelming urge to ask the Chilly Academic to use some bloody common sense for once. Of course they didn't want to be punished. No one ever wanted to own up to the consequences. They weren't stupid…on that subject, at least.
"Well what do you want me to do?" he asked, shifting in his chair.
"Kill them!"
Xemnas sighed. "We've been through this before…"
"Then at least order a castle-wide search. Have them looked for until they're found and bring them to me."
The Superior half expected him to finish with diabolical laughter. Truthfully, he didn't care one way or another, but if doing this would shut Number IV up…
"Fine."
Well away from the kitchen, Roxas and Axel dragged several bags behind them as they journeyed to their new 'home away from home'. The younger of the two had no idea where that was, but he could tell his friend had an idea from that wicked gleam in his eye.
"Sooo…why'd you want to stay with Larxene?" he asked innocently.
The pyro faltered. "Uh, it's closer to the kitchen?"
Good enough for him. Naïve and every bit a young, hormone-free little kid, Roxas' mind moved on to other things, like how he was getting kind of hungry. Some chocolate pudding would be good. Studies showed that daily chocolate pudding consumption led to a 5 increase in yummy…
"Well, we're here," Axel declared, dropping his luggage in front of the door.
"Where are we?"
"You'll see," the Flurry of Dancing Flames said, reaching for the knob. "Let's go talk to our new roomy!"
Life was a meaningless void.
Death was the black abyss that every soul craved.
Nothing mattered.
All was useless in the nonexistent scheme of things.
The only truth was preached by those who understood this pain. Who could translate it for the world to listen to.And, on top of it, they made the truth into pretty catchy rock songs.
Yes, they were the few, the proud, Fall Out Boy.
'One night and one more time,
Thanks for the memories
Even if they weren't so great-'
An obnoxious knock sent Zexion out of his reverie. A visitor? He hadn't had one of those in years…No, make that never. He considered not opening the door. But what if it was the Superior with an urgent message? He sighed and took the handle in his hand-
No sooner had number XI turned the knob, he was thrown back, hitting the floor with a thud. Axel busted in with some blonde he couldn't remember ever seeing.
"Dude, we be in the crib!"
"Fo' rizzle, my kazizzle!"
The Cloaked Schemer blinked. What just came out of their mouths? Were those actual words?
"Who…is…he?" he managed to squeeze out.
"Uh, Roxas? Numero XIII? He's been here, like, five months. C'mon, you've seen him at the meetings!"
When the Cloaked Schemer made no signs of understanding, the pyro continued. "Well anyway, Roxas, this is Zexion, the goth."
"Hi, Zexy!"
"It's emo, you dolt."
"And Zexy, this is my homey, Roxas."
Awkward silence.
"What do you two want?" Zexion finally asked.
"Good question! Well, we're going to be crashing with you until Vexen stops chasing us. I mean, no one would bother looking in this part of the castle, anyway. So we shouldn't be here too long. One or two months."
Without waiting for an answer, the two began to move themselves in.
"Uh, let's see…we brought snackage, party games, my laptop-" Roxas began pulling out items from his suitcase.Number VI felt himself beginning to go into shock.
"And, dude, let's change the music." Axel swapped CD's so they were now listening to some annoyingly repetitive song about an umbrella.
"Wow, it's really dark in here. Let's turn on some lights…"
Twenty minutes later, Zexion's former emo cell/dark lair/Batcave had been transformed into a lava-lamped room, complete with posters of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition models, five bean bags, twenty-some annoyingly adorable stuffed animals, a Wii and T.V., and a stereo blaring 'Cyclone'.
The Cloaked Schemer couldn't decide if this was a nightmare, he was getting Punk'd, or both.
His two tormenters were currently watching some annoying Youtube videos about two ditzy unicorns and a mountain made of candy and eating gummy worms like they were going out of style.
Two months of this? No way in heck.
Zexion portalled as fast as his emo butt could.
"Hey, get us some snacks while you're out!" the pyro called.
Soundly tied in Vexen's lab chairs, Roxas and Axel were far too wrapped up in their own musings to listen to number IV as he described their punishment.
"I can't believe Zexion ratted us out like that. I mean, what did we do that was so horrible? Improve his life?" Axel grumbled.
Number XIII stared down at the ropes binding him. "Have you noticed how many times I get tied up? Are we easy targets or something?"
"No way. Now you take that guy, Sephiroth. I'd say he was easier-"
"Nuh-uh. I'd hate to take him on."
"Well, I think-"
"Would the two of you SHUT UP?!" Vexen snapped. "I was explaining the experiment!"
Number VIII was silent a moment, thinking in his head about what the Chilly Academic had said while he and his buddy had discussed much more important things. See, he had mastered the art of talking AND listening at the same time, something he now put into good use. Something about a poor, defenseless animal…and knives…Actually, it sounded like full-out torture on a miniature scale. Sounded fun.
"And that's a punishment, how?"
"Obviously you two are unfamiliar with the dissection process."
The Chilly Academic wheeled a cart to the two, it containing two dead frogs in separate metal pans. Scalpels, scissors, and other tools were off to one side.
"Eww," Roxas blanched, "one's tongue is hanging out of his mouth."
"You two will take out all of their organs and lay them out. I will eave and lock the door. You have two hours."
"We can portal," Axel pointed out.
"Not in this room," the older man smiled smugly, "Specially designed."
With this, number IV untied the two and swiftly left the room before they could react. For an old guy, he had speed. For the first five minutes they blankly stared at the dead animals before them and each other. Finally the pyro timidly took up the scissors. Really seeing the things in their slimy-dead-ugly glory made him re-evaluate his opinion of this little "activity."
"How am I supposed to cut it?"
Number XIII wrinkled his nose. "It smells like dead fish. And it's looking at me."
"Why would he need TWO sets of frog organs? Forget this." Axel set his specimen on fire and watched it burn with little emotion.
"Want me to do yours?"
His friend shook his head no. "I'm gonna try to do this."
So, mustering up all of his courage, Roxas began to cut into the frog, gagging several times. He managed to locate all the necessary organs, carefully laying them out once he had cut them free. Number VIII was roasting some marshmallows he found in his pocket over the fire he had created.
"Mmm…fishy," he said with relish.
When the task was completed, Roxas checked the clock on the wall. They had about thirty minutes He grabbed the scalpel again.
"Let's check out Moosey's eyes."
"Moosey?"
The younger of the two shrugged and gestured at the frog. "It's as good of a name as any."
Finally Axel shrugged and his buddy stabbed at Moosey's peepers. A stream of yellow liquid shot out, landing right on the pyro's tongue. For a moment he was frozen in shock. The next, a look of utter horror crossed his face and he was bent over, sputtering.
Roxas doubled over, laughing. If only Larxene hadn't taken their camera…
When Vexen returned, he noticed that the two enemies were rather enjoying themselves. Of course. There was no justice in the worlds.
"Did you do as I asked?"
"Well, Axel kind of burnt his…but here's mine." XIII presented Moosey.
Vexen looked at the frog's remains slowly, enjoying the fact that he was making the other two impatient. He had to admit that Roxas's frog had been handled carefully. If he wasn't so annoying he might consider making him his lab assistant…
"OK, you're free to go. I let you off e-" his words fell on deaf ears, the two already running to the nearest sink to wash off the penguin-like smell. Grumbling to himself, the Chilly Academic began cleaning up.
"Psst…Larxy!" Looking up from her book, the woman stared headlong into a dead frog-and screamed.
"Here, catch it!"
"Get that THING away from me! I can see it's insides and everything! It's TONGUE is sticking out!"
"Aww, c'mon! We had to get Moosey out of the trash just so you could see him! Show some appreciation!"
Larxene, covering her ears, fled the room. Even the Savage Nymph had a weakness or two. Now that she was gone, the two used the lab specimen to play catch.
"Hey," Axel began slowly, "why don't we see how our emo friend takes to Moosey…"
"Only one way to find out…"
FIN
I had to dissect a frog (whose tongue was hanging out) in Biology this year...not pleasant. Some guy a few tables over actually had Axel's experience. (Well, he didn't roast marshmallows over it's flaming body, because that would be beastly, but the eye juice got in his mouth.) I'm glad I'm not him.
Reviews are still appreciated! For every one I receive, I make sure to check the author and their stories out. So thanks for reading and be sure to stay tuned...there is more to come!