He would never be able to see the beautiful blue sky again. He would never get to see his beloved rose garden once it turned spring again. Worst of all, he would never be able to see people again. Alfred...he would never get to stare into his lover's amazing sparkling blue eyes, or his white toothed smile. Never again would he see Alfred's golden wheat colored hair, or his smooth tanned skin. All he would see was darkness. He was now only able to hear, forevermore only getting to hear voices that belonged to faceless people.
Currently he sat on the rocking chair located in the bedroom, a quilt wrapped securely around his shoulders. Alfred had opened the curtains of the bedroom, so he could feel a patch of sunlight hitting his face. His ears pricked up at the sound of footsteps in the hallway. It must have been Matthew. Alfred had told him of the new schedule of people that would be over whenever he had to work. After all, he was a helpless in-the way sightless person now. He needed to be watched.
"Um, Arthur? Are you in here?" Matthew's soft (almost timid) voice called. Arthur could hear the creak of the door as Matthew came inside.
It was really weird sometimes, because he could hear the smallest noises now, things that he'd never be able to pick up before he'd lost his sight. He'd read something once about how blind people's hearing was more sensitive since it was the main thing they relied on, but he never knew it was this true.
Once again he heard Matthew shuffling across the room towards him, and then there was the gentle creek of him sitting down on the corner of the bed, so that he was facing Arthur. "So...how are you?" He asked. Arthur had even heard him swallow from nervousness.
"Fine," Arthur replied, crossing his arms and looking in the direction of the window.
"That's good," Matthew said cheerfully. "It's been awhile."
Arthur supposed that it had been a while. The last time he had seen (or rather heard) Matthew was when he was still at the hospital. He'd kind of had a freak out when the Canadian had visited. It was a bit difficult to remember, but he believed that he'd had a rather violent panic attack when Matthew arrived, screaming about how he didn't want anybody near him, or to see him like this.
What was he going to do with his life now? His work had given him a "long term break" but he knew that he would no longer be able to work for them anymore. His boss was a rather strict man, and he had no time to deal with handicapped workers.
Suddenly he realized that it had been several minutes since Matthew had spoke, and he had failed to reply. He could sense Matthew's nervousness, mostly due to the fact of the shifting noises, indicating that he was rubbing at his neck.
"Er...how about we go sit out on the porch? It's a really nice day out for winter time. " Matthew suggested.
"No thank you," Arthur replied evenly. "I'm rather content being inside."
"Oh," Matthew swallowed again. "Well what about going into the living room? I could put on the radio or tv or something...for background noise. It just seems so lonely in here."
"Maybe for you," Arthur responded. "But I like it."
Noise was scary now too, along with the darkness. With noise, it would be more harder to hear. That was partly why he didn't want to go anywhere in public. Mostly it was because he was ashamed though. He knew what people would think when they saw him shuffling and tripping over everything. They would pity him, and he didn't want their damned pity.
Matthew sighed. "Well, how about I make something to eat. I'm in the mood for pancakes, how does that sound?"
"No thank you, I'm not hungry." Arthur answered.
"So you're just going to sit here?" Matthew inquired.
"Mhm," Arthur said. "That's not a problem, is it?"
There was a silence, and once again Matthew sighed. "No, I guess not."
A week later, Arthur was in the kitchen. He'd pretty much had the whole house mapped out. He knew where all the end tables, chairs, and couches were. He knew how to get to each of the doors, and where each different shampoo was in the shower.
Showing was actually pretty scary now. He couldn't see anything as water pounded mercilessly upon his back, and dripped down from his hair and into his face. Alfred must have understood his new resentment of showers, and often sat on the toilet and chatted with Arthur while the Brit washed himself. It made everything a lot better, because something about Alfred's voice was able to sooth him.
As each day passed, for some odd reason Arthur felt himself longing to leave the house and go somewhere. He was starting to miss people, which was weird since he wasn't really much of a people person in the first place. His fear held him back of course. Until one day, that is.
"Please Artie," Alfred practically begged, and Arthur heard the sound of his hands clasping together. "Just for a little walk. It's been so long since you've been out."
"I...I'm not sure," Said Arthur, hesitation evident in his voice.
"You'll be with me the whole time sweetheart. I promise that nothing will happen. We'll walk down the street to the Antonio's Cafe get those pastries you love." Alfred bribed. Something about the way he said it made Arthur really start to consider it. Maybe one little trip wouldn't hurt. After all, he knew where that Cafe was, just six or so houses down.
"Well...Alright, I suppose." Arthur whispered in agreement, hoping that he hadn't sealed his death sentence or something.
"Oh Artie," Alfred breathed. "Thank you! I knew you'd say yes. It'll be great, you'll see!"
With that, Alfred made sure his beloved was buttoned safely into his coat, and bundled warmly with a scarf and gloves. Arthur felt Alfred's warm hand close tightly around his own, and then the door opened. For the first time in over a month, he felt the cold fresh air breeze around his face. He inhaled, smelling the fresh sweet snow. It must have been melting because of the sunshine though, because he could hear the drip drop of melted ice falling from the roof and tree branches.
Together, he and Alfred made it down the front porch, down the path, and onto the sidewalk. A few steps down and Arthur's foot hit a patch of ice. He slipped a bit and gasped, but Alfred easily held him up.
"It's okay babe, I won't let you fall." Alfred reassured him, and once again Arthur believed him. Suddenly there was a loud whooshing sound of a fast car passing them, and automatically Arthur gripped his husband's hand tighter. It was odd though, for he heard the car for far longer after it had passed them. It was louder in his right ear, so therefore it must have taken a right turn at the intersection. Eventually the sound faded away.
As they slowly made it down the street, Alfred began chattering about everything. He described various things to Arthur. Old Mr. Kresley was shoveling his front porch, which explained the weird scraping noise Arthur had been hearing. The little Bennett kids in the big white house were making a snowman in the front yard, which explained the distant giggles he heard. There was a jogger on the other side of the street, apparently listening to her ipod. That explained the slapping noise; her feet hitting the pavement.
The more Alfred talked about what was going on around them, the more Arthur began to feel safer. It could almost see exactly what was going on from the way the American talked. It was almost as if Alfred was his eyes.
"Look, we've practically made it. I'm feeling up for hot chocolate along with those pastries, what do you say?" Alfred asked several minutes later, just as he'd finished explaining about the newly painted post office several buildings down from the cafe.
When Alfred opened the door for him, a burst of warm air hit Arthur's face, causing him to realize how cold it was outside. Suddenly so many sounds began to register with him. There was soft chatter coming from the far left corner, indicating that they were sitting near the small table by the window. He also heard a man ordering a large coffee with extra cream and a piece of cheesecake. Antonio responded cheerfully how delicious the cheesecake was, and then told the man the amount it would cost.
Arthur was pulled out of his senses at the gentle tug from Alfred, leading him over to Antonio so that they could order. It really wasn't a busy place, so there wasn't even a line. When Antonio caught sight of them, his eyes popped open in shock but he smiled happily.
"Alfred, Arthur! What a surprise! It's been quite sometime since you last visited, I was beginning to wonder if you'd found a better cafe or something." He greeted them like normal, showing no indication of Arthur's blindness, though he knew of it. All of their friends knew.
"Nah, there's no place better than your cafe 'Tonio!" Alfred replied joyfully. "We came for some hot chocolate and pastries."
"Wonderful! Coming right up!" Antonio told them. "And Arthur, I'm very glad your finally coming outside again. We've all missed you very much."
Normally Arthur probably would have been annoyed to know that people were talking about him, but Antonio had said his sentence with such true sincerity that it was pretty much impossible to get upset. Instead, he felt his face redden a bit and he chuckled.
"It's...it's good to be out."
As he and Alfred sat down at a table drinking hot chocolate and pastries (He didn't spill one drop of food surprisingly), he listened to the low happy Mexican music in the background, the idle chatter of other customers, and the low humming coming from Antonio as he presumably was cleaning tables nearby. This was actually quite nice. He could help but smile a bit, but then frowned when he thought of the bigger obstacles waiting out there for him. Alfred wouldn't always be able to stay by his side twenty four-seven. He wouldn't always have his extra pair of eyes nearby. How was he going to get by? Would he always need to be accompanied by someone whenever he went out, for the rest of his life?
What if somehow Alfred died, leaving Arthur all alone to fend for himself? The thought caused tears to suddenly well up in his eyes, smile turning into a wobbly frown.
"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" Alfred asked worriedly, seeing the heartbroken face of his lover.
Arthur could only shake his head wordlessly, unable to express his fears aloud.
That didn't stop them from eating at him though.
a/n: Thank you for your wonderful reviews, they always inspire me to update! Tell me how you liked this chapter! Sorry it's a tad bit short. The next chapter will be exciting though, so it'll make up for this! Updates may be a bit slower since I started Driver's Ed, which will keep me busier. Anyway, have a good Tuesday night! I know they can be boring, so hopefully this entertained you for a bit!