Author's note: This chapter and the one before it had probably a dozen variations before I arrived at the final versions. I tried just about every different point of view and played around with several different outcomes, but I didn't end up saving every version in its entirety, so what I'm posting here is a compilation of the best stuff I saved. You can see hints of other scenes in here so it's obvious that working through this chapter led me to ideas that I ended up using in later chapters.

They agreed to meet up again in the Western Approach, but it was too late to start back for Skyhold, so they decided to make camp beneath a rocky overhang nearby. Varric managed to convince Hawke to stay with them for a while, though he was frustrated by how much time she spent covertly glaring at Anders while they were talking. Though he had told Anders that she would have to come to terms with him on her own, he itched to fall back into his old role of peacemaker. He might have actually made an attempt if he could have figured out how to start the conversation, but every opener he could think of sounded condescending and trite. So he kept his mouth shut and listened to the Seeker interrogate Hawke about all her epic feats instead, trying not to take too much pleasure in Cassandra's constant disappointment.

"But how did you defeat the Arishok?" Cassandra cried. "His fighting prowess was legendary!"

Hawke sighed. "Well, he was pretty fast, but I'm faster, so I just sort of kept running away and waiting for him to swing that big club of a sword at me. Then, while he was trying to lift it up again, I'd get a few stabs in. It was really a matter of endurance."

Cassandra's expression darkened. "But that's..."

"Not as impressive as Varric made it sound? I get that a lot."

"Hey, a little embellishment never hurt anyone," Varric protested, standing up to stretch the kinks out of his back.

"You say that," Hawke said, "but you haven't had to deal with all the idiots who challenged me to a fight simply because your stories make me sound invincible."

"You've survived them, haven't you? Maybe I didn't exaggerate as much as you think."

"See? This is what he does when he knows I'm right about something," Hawke complained. "He turns on the charm and pays me a compliment."

Cassandra nodded with a frown. "He does, doesn't he?"

Excusing himself from the conversation before they could continue their critique, Varric wandered away from the campfire. When his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he saw Anders standing on the edge of camp looking out into the night, seemingly unaware of the water dripping from the overhang onto his head. Smiling, Varric moved forward to rescue him from his own lack of awareness, but paused when he saw Dorian step out of the shadows beside Anders.

"You are getting drenched standing out there like that," Dorian said, clucking his tongue as he pulled Anders out of the rain.

Glancing at him in surprise, Anders smiled reflexively, though he seemed to make a conscious effort not to lean into Dorian's touch. "I hadn't noticed."

"So I see." Dorian tugged on his shoulder when Anders shivered, pulling him closer to share body heat.

Anders stiffened slightly at the touch, but allowed himself to be moved. "We should investigate that rift in the lake tomorrow," he said softly. "I won't leave those villagers to fend for themselves like the Wardens did."

Lips curving with amusement, Dorian asked, "Don't you ever rest?"

"I'm not very good at it," Anders admitted reluctantly. Varric thought that must be the understatement of the year; back in Kirkwall he had always blamed Justice for Anders' obsession with work, but he could see now that Anders wasn't much better at relaxing without the spirit's influence, though that probably had as much to do with the endless demands of the Inquisition as anything else.

Peering at him curiously, Dorian observed, "You seem troubled."

Anders sighed, but didn't reply. Varric realized at this point that he was blatantly eavesdropping on their conversation and considered retreating, but his curiosity won him over. Besides, he got his best material from listening in on conversations.

"If you need to talk. I'm more than happy to listen," Dorian said in a tone that promised far more than conversation.

"I'd put that much together, yes." Anders wasn't exactly dismissive, but it wasn't encouraging either.

"Does that mean you aren't interested?"

Anders gave Dorian a look that was so steeped in vulnerability Varric immediately felt guilty for eavesdropping on something so private. "That's not it," Anders said finally. "But I'm too committed to our cause to have the time or energy for anything else right now. Stopping Corypheus is all that matters."

Dorian chuckled and shifted his grip on Anders' shoulder, tracing lightly down his arm and adjusting his stance in order to slip his arm around Anders' waist. "In Tevinter this sort of liaison is desperate and fleeting by necessity so I have no expectations of romance or commitment. But I find you intriguing and you're obviously lonely. I'm more than happy to provide a little comfort. Whatever you need."

Anders frowned. "You deserve better than that."

"Aren't you sweet?" Dorian tugged him closer. "But I'm content with whatever you're willing to offer."

Anders glanced over his shoulder in the direction of the camp and the two women still seated in the glow of the fire. Slouching a bit further into the shadows, Varric wondered if he should slip away before he got caught, but he froze in place when he saw Anders step out of the circle of Dorian's arm and out into the rain.

"I'm sorry, Dorian," he said sadly, raindrops falling over his face like tears. "I won't say I'm not tempted. But here? Tonight? I can't."

"Another time, then?" Dorian lifted a hand to Anders cheek and leaned in to press a lingering kiss against Anders' lips before turning away. "You know where to find me."

Varric held his breath while Dorian returned to camp, knowing he should probably follow him and leave Anders to his own thoughts, but his better judgment failed to stop him from doing the opposite. Purposely stepping on a branch to announce his presence as he approached, he smiled disarmingly at Anders when the mage rounded on him with an exasperated expression.

"Varric," Anders said, annoyance shifting to resignation when he saw him. "How much did you overhear?"

Shrugging, Varric decided to answer honestly. "Pretty much all of it."

Anders groaned.

"Don't worry, Blondie. Your secrets are safe with me."

Scoffing, Anders leaned back against a nearby rock and buried his face in his hands. "I'm a complete mess, aren't I?"

"That isn't exactly new."

Anders peeked out at him from between his fingers. "Your reassurance is overwhelming."

Shrugging, Varric replied, "If it makes you feel any better, you surprised me just now. I've been expecting you and Sparkler to fall into bed together for a while."

Anders let his hands fall to his sides. "And yet you sound less than enthused by the prospect."

"As you just established, you're a bit of a mess. And despite his air of invincibility I have my doubts that Sparkler is much better."

Looking back at the campfire, Anders watched Dorian exchange a few words with Cassandra and Hawke before disappearing into one of the tents. "It's strange what he said about Tevinter. Affection was just as fleeting in the Circle. I used to fantasize about what it would be like to live in a place where I could be a free mage who wasn't persecuted for his powers. I wanted that kind of life so badly I could taste it. But here he is, a mage from Tevinter who grew up every bit as persecuted as I was, only for completely different reasons."

"Life is hard everywhere."

"That's true enough. At times he reminds me so much of myself that it's painful to even listen to him." Shaking his head, he looked back at Varric. "I used to be a lot like him before I met Justice. I could charm my way into anyone's bed with a few words and a smile. I never hesitated and I never looked back."

Perching on a rock across from him, Varric arched a brow. "To be honest, I have a hard time imagining you like that."

"I think you would have liked me back then. I was great at making people laugh and horrible at taking anything seriously. I was also a lot of fun, or so I've been told."

Varric folded his arms over his chest and said decisively, "I like you well enough as you are now."

"Even though I'm a complete mess?"

Varric laughed. "Being a mess is part of your charm!"

Rubbing at his forehead in frustration, Anders grimaced, "Please tell me that's not true."

"Sorry, Blondie, but I suspect that no matter how different you think you are now, you've always been a bit of a mess."

Sighing deeply, Anders leaned back and looked up at the rocky outcropping above them as if it held the answer he was seeking. Finally, he said, "You're probably right. I just covered it up better back then."

"And now you don't have to."

A smile tugged at the corners of Anders' eyes. "Is that right? I thought being in charge of the Inquisition came with the unwritten requirement of being able to leave my mess at the door."

Varric considered that thoughtfully. "They knew who you were when they chose you. And there's something to be said for a vulnerable leader. It's helps to know you're flawed like the rest of us."

"To a point, I suppose."

"I think they also believed you could rise to the occasion, which you have. So stop beating yourself up about it, okay?"

A smile brightened Anders' eyes before it reached his lips, and the affection in it made Varric want to squirm in embarrassment. "You're surprisingly good at this encouragement thing."

Forcing a laugh, Varric asked, "What's surprising about that? I'm good at most things I try."

"Except for humility, it seems."

"Who says I've ever tried it?"

Still smiling, Anders shook his head and turned away. "Good night, Varric."

"Night, Blondie."

Varric wasn't sure what made him wait while Anders walked back to camp, but he was glad he did when he heard the shuffle of boots in the underbrush. The dying light of the fire barely illuminated Hawke's features as she sat down on a rock beside him, but he wasn't sure if he would be able to read her expression even if he could see it more clearly.

"How much did you hear?" he asked, smirking at his sudden role reversal.

"Not much. Enough to realize he is struggling more than I thought."

Varric nodded. "And?"

"I'm not ready to forgive him, if that's what you're asking. But I can see how one could start to accept him again."

"One?" Varric arched a brow at her.

She smiled wearily. "You."

"That sounds almost like progress."

"Don't read too much into it." Standing up and brushing the dirt off her breeches, she started to back away. "I should be getting back to the cave. Stroud and I are leaving for the Western Approach first thing in the morning. I'll see you there."

"Be careful."

Hawke rolled her eyes at him.

Laughing, he revised, "And leave some fun for the rest of us."