"Mama why is that man naked?"

"Honestly, some people shouldn't be allowed in public."

"Poor sod, must have been kicked out by his woman".

"Do ye think he be protesting something?"

"Yeah yeah, naked guy keep moving." I sat there waiting in front of a small inn as crowds walked past, pointing and whispering, loudly. "This is bullshit, they've been gone for like 5 minutes."

"Oi, stable boy! Come take our horses." I looked over at a group of tall men with long flowing hair and flawless pale skin. One of them wore shining plate mail while the other two had banners of some sort on theirs. They all had slanted eyes and pointed ears. "Did you hear me boy? Or do you need your hearing checked along with your wardrobe?" he looked back to his companions and they all laughed along with him.

"Oh great, a group of stuck up elves, just what I need." I thought to myself. Looking over the horses, I noticed some saddlebags that were overflowing and a small smile crept over my face.. "Well now… Yes sir, I'm sorry sir. Me and my poor human ears couldn't hear yer lordship." I threw on a bumpkin accent and tried to look humble as I took the reins. "if I may be so bold m'lord, yer gear could look just a bit shinier. I've got some silver polish in the back. I could shine them up right quick if ye'll only put in a good word with my master inside."

The elf raised his eyebrows, "well now, a human who can show the right respect. He snapped his fingers and his companions stepped forward to help him out of his armor. He was wearing a set of silk clothes underneath and he pulled a pair of black leather boots on from the saddlebags. He straightened and tossed me a gold coin with a brilliant smug smile on his face. "I'm feeling generous, we just cleared a large dungeon." He slapped his saddlebags. "You make sure to do a good job and maybe there will be another." He turned and walked away chin held high and cheeks clenched tight.

"Oh m'lord thank you m'lord. I'll do a good job I swear on me mum." He waved without looking back as he strode into the inn. "Ye fucking prick m'lord. Ye wipe yer ass with silk m'lord?" I giggled in glee as I pulled the horses into the alleyway and began rummaging through the saddlebags.

I had to rummage for a little while before I found clothes that fit me. I settled for a loose wool shirt with sleeves I could roll up and some nice leather pants and boots. I was only half surprised to find a clean pair of silk boxers in the leader's saddle. "Well I feel better, at least I'm not naked." I looked at the armor draped over the saddle and pursed my lips. "Oh come on, you're in a fantasy world and a big nerd…I hope it fits!" It took me a few minutes to figure out what clipped where and I had to change the boots back.

Eventually I stood there in shining full plate mail. "Hmm doesn't weigh as much as I thought. Maybe its mithrial or something." I moved and stretched around a bit finding it surprisingly light and flexible. "M'lord fancy-britches has excellent taste. Wonder what else he has." I rooted through the bags and found some jewelry and a small black stud earring. I reached up to my ear where I had my cartilage pierced and felt nothing. "Wow can't believe I forgot. I would have had to pierce it again. I managed to get the stud in and as it clicked closed I suddenly felt lighter and more agile. I jumped and managed a flip off the wall before landing gracefully on my feet again. "Enchanted piercing…awesome!"

I quickly slipped on the rest of the jewelry but other than a pendant which gave me a warm feeling nothing happened. "Oh well that was too good to be true. Let's see if there's anything else. Whoa…" I pulled the last item from the saddle bags. I pulled it out slowly scared that I would break it. The hilt was shaped in the form of a dragon with the handle as its body, its tail curled around the hilt and ended in a ruby at the bottom. . The cross guard was designed after its wings and the golden blade flowed out of its mouth in the shape of fire. It felt warm in my hand and the blade seemed to shimmer with a life of its own. "Sword…" I stared at it in awe and moved it through some of the motions I remembered from fencing years ago. "Feels amazing, I wonder why he kept it in the saddlebags. It's beautiful."

[Well thank you, I do take pride in my appearance.] I stopped what I was doing and stared eyes wide at the sword. "Swords, don't talk. Do they?" I shook my head and turned around and fell on my ass at what appeared before me.

[Most of them don't. some of the more magical ones do though it is quite rare.] A small scaled figure was floating in front of me without flapping its bat like wings. Its skin was different shades of brown, orange and green and its eyes glowed with mischief. [However a Dragon-soul sword with a dragon in it might have a few things to say to someone who rescued it from the depths of a saddlebag.] Its voice echoed in my mind but it seemed warm and kind if not highly sarcastic.

[My name is Dereloth, the Laughing Flame. And you are now my lucky victim.] He opened his mouth and flames roared out and consumed me.