Chapter 3

The three of us met Rukia outside the squad 13 headquarters. There was a kind of resemblance between her and Captain Kuchiki, with the greyish eyes and dark straight hair, though I had heard Rukia was adopted. Rukia was quite small, standing what looked like a good 20 cm shorter than I. I met her gaze for a moment, then looked down. Ironic. I must have initially looked imposing next to her, but she beat me in a staredown in fewer than a couple seconds.

"Is this her?" she asked Captain Kuchiki.

Oh joy. News of me had traveled past my own squad to the others. Hooray, I was a local celebrity.

"Yes, this is Shina. I'm interested in seeing her skills so I'm taking her along." The Captain answered. I gave a weak half-smile. Rukia nodded. She had a very down-to-business sort of attitude, a strict feature she shared with her brother.

"Let's go then." She said.

OK, there is no way around it. My experience going through the portal to the World of the Living was awful. Listen, it's not my fault. It's embarrassing, but I'm actually agoraphobe, meaning that I'm afraid of huge, wide open spaces. The portal to the human world is basically huge, open blackness. I was terrified, trembling as I ran through. My legs were basically gelatin. All of a sudden, my feet completely slipped out from under me. I was so exhausted from running, and the fear was making me weak, so I was falling…

A hand grabbed my shoulder, pulling me up. I looked behind me, my vision still blurred. Even with my temporarily impaired eyesight, I could make out Renji's brown eyes. His grasp made me feel secure, that I wouldn't have to ever worry again, that I would be safe. This feeling… I felt amazing and nauseas all at once. Never let me go.

"You gotta be careful out here."

That voice… I wished I could hear it all the time, saying comforting words to me. I felt like I was-

A blinding light hit me. I realized that I'd still been running, but I hadn't really been paying attention as to where. Then I knew. This was the big moment. Renji's hand released me. My first time, seeing real, living people.

I was… uhh… underwhelmed I guess. I was expecting bright flashing lights, and colors, things I'd never seen before. But frankly… it kind of looked like the Soul Society, except there were humans. Maybe the houses were a little different, I guess. I was a little disappointed, but I tried my best not to show. Suddenly, I heard a voice. Renji's voice. He was right next to me.

"So, what do you think? Nice, huh?"

It's nice, I guess. I mean, I was frankly expecting a bit more, but I suppose that comes from the fact I had no prior knowledge on this place. I think it's interesting that it resembles the Soul Society a bit. But I'm so happy to be here, especially since I am here with you. I have to tell you, Renji I am so happy that we have been placed on the same squad, because I think you're incredible. I don't know how to convey it to you, but I feel a way about you that I have never felt before about any other. Renji, I knew from the moment I laid my eyes on you, that I am utterly in love with you.

"Uhhh… it's OK." I sounded like a meek little girl. My voice cracked.

"Good! Get ready, the hollows here are tricky."

Alright. I can't wait to fight these guys with you. I'm sure you're incredible, being a lieutenant and all. I know that you and Captain Kuchiki are anticipating watching my fighting style, but, to be honest, I can't wait to see how you fight. I'm sure you're amazing!

Me: "…"

Captain Kuchiki was standing with Rukia, checking his soul pager. There wasn't really much going on, so I looked up and mustered up something within me to be able to talk to Renji. So I opened my mouth, and-

He wasn't looking at me. He wasn't even just looking around. His gaze was completely fixated on… her. Rukia. His eyes were filled with this passion, this fire, this feeling. A side of him I'd never seen before. I furrowed my brow. What was this expression he wore? Rukia looked over her shoulder at him. Renji smiled at her. She returned it. She had a pretty smile, especially since this one was genuine. It creased her grey-violet eyes, and brightened her whole face. Just looking at Renji seemed to make all her cares go away, it seemed to lighten her up. Him, too. He suffered the same effects. Me? I stood from the sidelines, watching this exchange of grins. Exchange of… affection… My heart was falling into the pit of my stomach, it was falling apart. All along, I really do think I did know what was developing. But oftentimes, when something happens that you don't want to accept, you lie to yourself, saying "it's not happening… it's not happening…" And, eventually, you so compulsively lie to yourself, that you believe your own lie.

Right at that moment, looking at the both of them, for a split second, for an immeasurably short amount of time, I knew what was going on. But, then came that lying impulse. No way. They're just friends. You fret too much. You got nothin' to worry about.

I was so glad a hollow came right then. Right as I swore my heart couldn't sink any lower into the depths of my gut, we heard that familiar booming roar. I whipped around, my shoulder-blade-length curly hair flying wild. There it was. It was huge, and white masked, with that distinctive hole in its chest. Its solid yellow eyes seemed tortured and agonized. Its loud steps were coming in our direction. This huge beast glared, as it appeared to be gritting its teeth. To be honest, the idea of fighting hollows had always conflicted me in a way, knowing they were souls once, good souls at that. But, the good thing was, if they were good people in their life as a person, they would be sent to the soul society.

I drew my Zanpukato. I could feel my spirit energy pulsing through me, coursing through my veins. Renji drew his sword, too. He leaned over to me and whispered, "Show Captain Byakuya everything you've got."

Everything?

Even Bankai?

If you insist.