I laid and watched her sleep for hours, curled up in front of me. Her long black hair fanned out behind her, and some fell over her pale shoulder. She was beautiful in all aspects, but laying out in front of me in her grey tank top and matching panties, she was breath taking. Lily was my everything, she was my entire world. She was wrapped tightly in my arms but still felt like she was on the other side of the room, and I know it was because of me.

Lily was my everything and Paige was just some slut I could stick my dick in out on the road. She was the closest thing I could ever get to Lily. When I first saw her, I had to take a double look. They were twins in the sense of gorgeous, except for their eye colors and the fact that Paige hadn't given birth to my offspring. Each time I met Paige backstage or at the hotels after work, I promised myself it would be the last time. After each 'last time', I couldn't stop myself. It turned from just late-night meetings to morning, afternoon, and late-night evenings. Seth quickly caught on and continuously threatened to reveal mine and Paige's secret relationship to the both of our lovers. He cared for Lily and I had no idea why. It's like he secretly wanted to fuck her or something.

I had noticed Seth and Lily had gotten pretty close when he would come to stay with us overnight or stuff like that. They clicked and it pissed me off at first. Then I realized Lily had never even batted an eyelash at any other guy except for me. She was out of Seth's league, out of mine even. I don't know what kept Lily by my side. I know she loves me but once again, I don't know why.

I couldn't love anyone who would ever put me through all the things I've put this beautiful girl through. The drug addictions, pushing her away and denying her at first, leaving to go on the road, the fights we've had, and now my cheating. I was scum and she was a diamond in the dirt. She deserved better than me and deep down I think she knows it.

Lily rolled over and her head landed right in front of mine on my pillow, her blue eyes fluttering open. They were always so breath-taking right after she woke up. She grinned softly, running her warm small hand over my cheek. "I like your smooth face better," she said, referring to the stubble I'd been adorning for the past few days.

"Awh, you're not a fan of the whiskers?" I smirked.

She inched her face closer. "I love all of you, but I'm not a fan of the whiskers."

"I'll shave tomorrow."

She smiled softly and pressed a soft kiss to my bottom lip, sighing as soon as I kissed back. Her hand tangled in the back of my hair, pulling me closer to her. My arms wrapped her tighter, holding her as close to me as possible. I couldn't get the same high she gave me from anyone else. I didn't get the love I got from her from anyone else. I promised myself right in that moment there wouldn't be any more cheating. I loved her. God, I loved her so much.

She pushed at my boxers as I clawed at her panties, both of us desperate to get them off the other. I needed to be inside of her, let her take my worries away from me like she always did. "I need you, Jon. Fuck I need you so bad," were the words that came from her mouth as soon as I tossed her panties off. She wrapped her arms tightly around me and moved so she was on her back, her legs wrapping around the back of my thighs. Her lips were on my neck, sucking and kissing over my pulse. I thrust into her, that rush coming back over me as it always did. I welcomed it this time more than ever.

Each thrust knocked a little weight off my shoulder. The connection was there, helping to get each other off. First time I've felt it in a long time. She wanted me, needed me even. She unraveled around me, squeezing me even tighter.

She clung to me a long time after we both had finished and were fully clothed. I heard soft sobs leaving her body. I buried my face in the crook of her neck like she was doing to me and rolled us so that she was lying on top of me.

"I'm sorry, Jon. I'm so sorry."

"Sssshh," I whispered as I rubbed her back in efforts to calm her.

She picked her head up and stared at me for a few minutes. I could see pain in those blue eyes of hers, pain that hurt me even more. Pain that needed me to take it away from the person it inhabited. "I'm a bad person, aren't I Jon?"

"Lily why would you say that?" I asked as I stroked her silky black hair.

"I just feel like I am. I feel like I'm not good enough for you or that you're going to find someone else to take my place. It scares me to think of that. I don't want to be replaced."

I cupped her face in my large hands and brought her up to eye level. "Do not ever say that again, okay? You'll never be replaced. I'll never find someone like you, Lily. I have a family with you. You gave me the best thing that'll ever happen to me. You gave me yourself and our daughter. I don't know what I'd do without you, Lilith. I don't want to find out."

"Then promise me you'll be honest with me, Jon? If there's anything you think we need to work on, other than obvious things, tell me. Tell me now."

I knew I had to tell her. There was no keeping secrets from her. She always found out, always found out everything I kept from her. And she always got justice. I had to tell her before Seth got to her. I knew I was going to have to fight her til probably my death to keep her, but I was ready. "Promise me you won't hate me."

"I can't hate you, Jon."

I took a huge breath and tensed up. I knew she was going to either slap the living shit out of me or something. "I haven't been faithful…"

If you haven't guessed by now, we went into the head of Mr. Unfaithful.
What do you think Lily's reaction will be? Hmmm?
And yes, I realized I messed up on the eye color. Her eyes aren't green, they be brown mannnn.
Anyway, ya know what to do. :)