III
The theater that had been deserted this afternoon was brimming with life and laughter as the sun slowly retreated behind the horizon and dusk settled over the ruins.
The loud and enthusiastic cheers when Mikele and Paolo scored the final points as their team won the game 5:3 against Jorge's, could be heard far and wide.
Jorge's merry band of players looked grim, but Jorge and Mikele shook hands in the middle of the arena and that was that. Almost all the kids who hadn't played, boys and girls alike, ran down to congratulate the winning team.
"So this is what they are up to instead of doing chores or being useful and earning some money." A shadow fell over Jack and when he tore his eyes away from the arena, he was surprised to see Mikele's mother standing next to him.
He shrugged. "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. That's what they say... where I come from."
Mania, who hadn't gone down with the other kids, snuggled into his left side. "You'the no a dull boy, Jack. You'th a lot of fun."
"You are, not you is." He sighed at the blank look she gave him, and smiled. "Thank you, Princess Mania."
The girl's mother sat down next to him. "Mikele said I could find you here tonight. I know we talked about the apprenticeship and everything you did for us..."
"And you thanked me and I said it's no big deal," he replied gruffly. He wasn't doing anything profound here. He didn't want his stuff go to waste. Sure, he could have sold everything to Hadis, but Hadis was building himself a career on his own just fine.
"Well, you know I can't pay you anything for the mule or all the clay and the barn space..."
"As long as they help out wherever Hadis needs them, the barn space is theirs until they can pay the rent on their own."
She nodded and looked down at her lap. Jack noticed only now that she had brought a bundle with her. Something thick and furry. Now she handed it to him. "One of my... costumers gave this to me once."
He unfolded what turned out to be a warm blanket of soft black and brown rabbit skin. "I can't take this," he said, shaking his head. "You and the kids are going to need it in the winter."
She looked at him, her face pinched with stubborn determination. "Don't be stupid, Jack O'Neill. Not even the last month of the year will be cold enough to need a blanket like this. It's pure luxury when you have a house and a warm oven. But when you told us you're leaving, you said you'll go inland. The further north you go, the colder it will get at night in a couple of weeks time. If you won't take it, I will throw it away. You better not insult me by refusing."
"Ow me," Mania said, shaking her wild red mane. "You haveta do what the pwintheth and the queen tellth you to. You haveta take ouw gift with gwapitube."
"Gratitude," Mania's mom and Jack said as one.
"Yeth, gwapitube!"
"I feel very grateful, your majesty," Jack said sincerely, dropping a kiss to the mass of locks.
He took the blanket with a nod of thanks. He could roll it up and tie it together to carry it and even use it as a pouch for their spare clothes and other stuff. It would keep them both warm, that was for sure.
Down in the arena a new game had started with everyone just trying to get hold of the ball and kicking it around.
Mania's mother watched for a while and shook her head. But she smiled. "I hope they won't stop playing when you're gone. Mikele keeps talking about these games all week." As she stood and looked down at him Jack wondered, not for the first time, how old she might be. Had she even reached her thirties yet? It was hard to tell. Even though she was still attractive, life had already drawn too many lines into her face.
"I need to go back to work." She told Mania to bring Ranja home with her later, then she left quickly.
"I with you didn' haveta go," Mania whispered and sniffled. "Who'th gonna buy me lollipopth an pwintheth cawdth. And whoth gonna be my thquiwe. An' you takin' my pwinthe Danny away fwom me."
Jack swallowed down the sudden lump clogging his throat. He had thought dealing with Mikele's anger earlier today was hard. He'd been glad to find out the twins didn't seem to be angry with him for leaving when he'd come to watch the game earlier. Now he wished he'd stayed away. But Danny had insisted they go. And of course Jack had complied. It was the last kickball game he got to watch.
He looked for Danny and his magic hands, but his kid was down with the others. Jack could see him and Ranja jumping up and down and clapping their hands. The perfect little cheerleader.
He was on his own here.
He hugged the small girl to his side. "Soon Mikele can buy you lollipops and cards. And he's going to let you ride Thor. And maybe you can go to school when you're a bit older. How's that?"
She shrugged and sniffled some more. At least she wasn't crying in full flow. Yet.
"I'll come visit." The words were out before he could hold them back and he wanted to kick himself for making promises he most likely couldn't keep.
She sat up straight and beamed at him. "For realth?!"
"It might take a while because there's something Danny and I need to do and we have to travel a while to get there."
"But you'll come vithit thome day, yeth?"
Jack tried to remember if taking leave included off world visits. If he had saved the world as often as he seemed to recall, they owed him, right? "Yes. Some day."
"An' you'll bwing pwinthe Danny!"
"Danny would chew me out pretty bad if I didn't bring him. Until then you and Ranja have to help Mikele with all the pottery stuff and give Thor lots of pats and cuddles, okay?"
She nodded eagerly, scrambled to her feet and, with puckered lips, planted a quick kiss to his cheek. "You are fwee to twavel now, squiwe Jack."
She danced away, her red curls wafting around her like a cloud of flames, and Jack looked on with a sad smile, hoping that she would always stay a princess in her heart and that she'd find a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow some day.
By the time he collected his star child to return to Ba'th, the twins and Mikele were already gone. Jack rolled up the new blanket and wedged it under one arm.
Danny was sitting on the lowest tier, watching Jorge and some of his friends playing a game of dice. He looked so vulnerable among those bulky youngsters, but if Jack could be certain of one thing it was that those guys were putty in the child's hands.
Everyone was.
"He's a smart little shrimp," Jorge greeted Jack. "He already knows how to play Liar's Dice."
"Yeah. Thanks for teaching him such fun games," Jack said. His sarcasm went right over Jorge's head.
"We never play for money, just for tobacco. But he could probably make you rich if you let him play in a gambling house. He knows all the rules after just one round of watching," Jorge said and his friends confirmed that.
"Jorge won a whole bag of tobacco 'cuz I helped him," Danny informed Jack with pride. "What's a gambling house, Jack?"
The young men laughed and Jack scooped up his kid, struggling not to lose the blanket in the process. Once Danny and blanket were settled he said, "A gambling house is a place where you lose all your money playing dice and cards or roulette. No one as smart as you wants to go there." He gave Jorge a prompting look and, when he was sure the teen would follow, walked away from the group.
"Hey, I told ya I'm not gambling for money. Relax," Jorge growled when Jack turned to face him once they were out of earshot.
"Easy, big guy. That's not what I wanted to talk to you about. I have a small space over there." He pointed in the general direction of his abode. "Mikele can show you where exactly. There's some stuff. Spare saddlebags for the mule, some dishes, candles. Just stuff I won't take with me. Bring the saddlebags down to the barn and sell the rest or keep it."
He had given some of his possessions he kept at Viktor's booth to Mikele. He figured Jorge could use the shelter up here to sleep. He didn't even know if the guy had a home down on the Lance.
Jorge pulled a clump of tobacco from his pants and a small bag with rolling paper. He started preparing his cigaret with nimble fingers even though it was almost completely dark now. "What turned you into a do-gooder all of a sudden, eh? Where are you going anyway?"
Jack wished people would stop asking him that.
"We're on a mission," Danny piped up.
Jorge snorted as he lit his cigaret. "A mission?"
"A very im-por-tant mission," Danny said.
"Let's just say I have things to do, places to go," Jack put an end to this. "Right now I need to get some sleep and it's a long way down to the beach."
Jorge held up his hand and Danny high-fived him. "I'm going to miss you, little shrimp. Keep your new dada on his toes." He gave Jack a sloppy salute and trotted off to rejoin his friends and their dice.
Jack managed to swing Danny up to sit on his shoulders without dropping his new blanket. "Ready to take this old mule home?"
Danny giggled and patted Jack's head. "Giddy up, giddy up!"
It was late and he wasn't really in the mood for horseplay, but he did a couple of leapfrogs just to humor the kid and was rewarded with peals of laughter and more gentle head-patting.
When he hiked down the main road – they had left Thor in town before they'd come up here for the ball game – the moon had come out. There were no clouds and the sky presented itself in all its starry glory. Jack spared a thought for Mohawk, wondering where his almost lover had gone and if he knew whoever had brainwashed him and his team.
SG-1. His team. Even though he remembered them by now, he kind of wished he didn't. His priorities were clear. He had to do whatever possible to find them and bring them home. But it was an obligation, nothing more.
Danny had told Mikele SG-1 was family and Jack knew it used to be that way, but he didn't feel that kind of connection with them. He wondered if that was because of the memory stamp still trying to suppress his former life?
All he knew for sure was that Daniel – the fully grown up version - was gone. What else was there to go back to?
"Jack, are you?"
He must have missed something the kid said. "Huh?"
"Jorge said you're my new dada. Are you?"
Speaking of taking on more commitment than he'd been asking for. At least he didn't have to leave this little guy behind and break his heart. And you better keep it that way, Jack thought, You've done enough of that to big-him.
"Jack?"
"Danny?"
A pat on his head. "Are you? For as long as I'm here?"
Jack felt his guts tightening. For as long as I'm here? "What? You going somewhere?"
"I dunno. Maybe I can stay like this. If you want me to."
Jack realized he didn't know what he wanted. Was there a choice in here somewhere? Or was this a lose-lose situation from the get go – would Danny serve his purpose of bringing SG-1 back together and then go back to where he'd come from, no matter what they both wanted?
"For now, let's just stick together and figure out how to get to Teal'c," Jack finally said. "Then, when this is all over, we'll... talk."
"That's what you said to Reetou Charlie. And then you sent him away," Danny pointed out.
"Reetou Charlie was very sick. He had to go to the Tok'ra to be fixed."
"But..."
Jack stopped walking. They had reached the first houses of town and the flickering light of oil lamps and candles brightened several windows. He lifted Danny off his shoulders and settled him on his hip so that they could look at each other. Some conversations needed to be face to face, from man to man.
"I'm not going to send you to the Tok'ra. Or anywhere. I'm not going to leave you on this planet either. Where I go, you go. If that's what you want." If that was part of the deal. Whatever the deal was, Daniel had made with Oma to be sent down here.
"Is that what you want, too?" Danny asked.
"Yeah. I need you to stick around and keep me company."
Danny tugged at his shirt. "Let me ride again, please!"
ooo
By the time they arrived at the beach Jack was convinced Danny must weigh a ton, especially once he'd fallen asleep, and their new blanket added to the dead weight.
He was tired, too, and glad he had already had his farewell drinks with Hadis last night. Their goodbye had been the least complicated or emotional, something Jack was grateful for. His friend hadn't asked too many questions either. He had wished him luck and complained about the fact that Jack had managed to talk him into taking two Lance kids under his wing. But a moment later he had already elaborated in detail on how Mikele and Jorge would be useful and increase his own profit.
So when Jack spread the new rabbit-skin blanket out on the sand and put Danny down on it after he'd pulled off the new boots, his mind was set on sleep and that they had to be up at sunrise in order to catch the early train out of Ba'th.
In Colorado, Jack would have set his alarm. Out here he only had the kid to rely on, but that was okay. Danny was an early riser – as opposed to his adult counterpart. Daniel hadn't been approachable until his second cup of coffee on a good day. Danny was up and running with the first light because every new day was full of wonders and things to explore.
Danny curled up, his thumb finding his mouth on auto pilot, and slept on. Jack considered just lying down next to him, but decided they'd be more comfortable with another blanket to cover them. He pulled the booth key from his pants as he headed for the small hut.
He sensed the movement before he saw the tall figure stepping out of the shadows and into the moonlight. Jack's hand clamped around the handle of a gun that wasn't there. Interesting new development on the memory lane. He forced himself to relax.
"What do you want?" he asked, keeping his voice low.
"Rumor has it you're leaving Ba'th," Mohawk said.
"And? So? Therefore?"
"Where are you going?"
"Oh, here and there, following the yellow brick road."
There was that confused pause in conversation Jack remembered getting from countless non-earthlings whenever he pulled one of his famous Oz or Simpson references.
Mohawk recovered rather quickly, apparently not interested in what the yellow brick road might be. "I like you, Jack. So I'm doing you a favor by telling you to be careful."
"Ye-ah, thanks, I guess. You don't happen to have some intel on what's going on here?"
"I can't."
"Can't or won't."
Mohawk came closer and Jack wondered what color his hair was today. He couldn't make it out in the moonlight, but It had to be something dark. "I have to report you to my authorities. They need to know you're leaving and where you're going."
The unspoken 'but I haven't, yet' was loud enough for Jack to hear. "What, I'm not allowed to leave and move someplace else? Who's going to stop me? You?"
"Tell me you're just going to settle down elsewhere with a new choice of..." Mohawk's mouth twitched into a smirk, "career? Can you do that? Because if that is the case, you have nothing to worry about even if I report your relocation. Tell me it has nothing to do with suddenly remembering an old lover from the past and your belief that there is life on other worlds or," Mohawk jerked his chin to the right where, somewhere in the dark, Danny was asleep, "him."
Jack resisted the need to run over and make sure the kid was okay. That no one else had snuck up on him and taken Danny. He was sure they were alone. Sometimes you just had to rely on your gut.
"Who are you?" he asked sharply, then decided to crawl out on a limb. Another gut feeling. Probably a bad decision. He had shared kisses with this guy, he was compromised. "I know about the memory stamp. Stop playing mind games with me. Either give me some answers or walk away. Right now. I can't keep you from reporting me if that's what you must do." Which wasn't exactly true. A cold and detached part in Jack knew several ways to kill quickly with his bare hands and how to dispose of the body. Mohawk lucked out because Jack chose not to be a cold-blooded killer. "But if you really came out here to warn me I'd rather you wait until I'm gone before you do your duty to whoever's paying you."
Mohawk's eyes closed for a moment and he shook his head as if in denial.
Jack pushed on relentlessly. "Why haven't you reported me yet?"
"All you need to know is that they sent me in to keep an eye on you and find out whether or not the memory stamp is firmly in place. Authorities were worried because of the 'fairy tales' you kept telling your customers. But your Shadow was sure it's only leftover traces from your subconscious. The authorities, however, had issues with Sam as well..."
"Carter? What about her? Where is she?" Jack snapped.
"She is fine. She is with her Mentor. At least that's what authorities believe. They think there's a general malfunction with the stamp in combination with your brains. It probably has to do with your species."
"Care to explain that Shadow/Mentor thing to me?"
"I shouldn't even be talking to you about any of this," Mohawk hissed.
"Why not? It's just you and me and," Jack looked around as if he expected an audience, "a deserted beach to walk on. Nice and quiet. No one's going to interrupt. We even have another starry night. I almost feel nostalgic, but it was probably just part of whatever scam you were playing."
"I wasn't coming on to you on purpose. Believe it or not, that wasn't part of the plan."
"What plan? And what exactly was part of it?"
"Okay, fine, it WAS part of the plan. At first anyway. They told me to try and start something with you to gain your trust. But you happened to be... let's just say I didn't expect you to be so... hot." Mohawk shrugged.
"They?" Jack prompted.
"You're not missing a beat here, huh?" Jack's almost lover threw up his hands. "I probably can't give you the answers you want. Everything works on a need-to-know basis."
"Go on."
"The authorities reside in Madinah City, they are part of the government and head of the Armed Forces. They have control over the portal you call the stargate. Whenever travelers come through they are taken to the facilities to be scanned and stamped."
What followed was a lengthy explanation about Mohawk not knowing exactly how the stamping process worked or why it was done, followed by the reveal of the meaning of Shadow and Mentor, followed by...
"Hold it – rewind to the mentor part. You're my..." Jack blinked. "What?"
"I'm your Mentor. Your Shadow sent monthly reports about your progress and mentioned the weird tales you spin on your guide job and the authorities grew worried. They sent me to..."
"To make sure I'm not remembering stuff, I got that. Who's this Shadow fella? Who's been writing monthly reports about me? And while we're talking about me – what kind of productive purpose did they think I could have with what I've been doing around here?" Which was exactly nothing. Nothing that served society in any way. Unless you considered entertaining vacationers with stupid made-up stories something useful.
Mohawk rolled his shoulders and avoided Jack's eyes. "I don't know who your Shadow is. As for your purpose – you used to be a high ranking military leader and hard to place. After reviewing your memories, after knowing who you were, they tagged you as dangerous. They feared you'd grow too powerful if they stamped you to serve at the Armed Forces or put you in any position that enabled you to gain money and influence. So they gave you the lowest level and placed you in Ba'th."
"Ah. Where'd they put Carter?"
"At the academy in Madinah, to teach engineering. She was a soldier as well, but she's a woman. No one believes a female soldier can be of much harm. Actually, no one believes there should be female soldiers in the first place."
Jack snorted and Mohawk shrugged. "I wasn't given her detailed data, but I've seen some of your memories of her. I know she was in your unit and they underestimated her on all levels. They review the memories of everyone they stamp. I am not sure why they didn't see Sam's potential. Because she was a scientist, too, they tagged her as useful. But she's a woman so they only gave her limited possibilities."
Jack grimaced. "What is it with you people? Why are you stuck in the dark ages on so many levels?" Carter was a wealth of knowledge and a kick-ass soldier. If they couldn't see that, it's their loss.
"I know. You don't have to tell me. It is time for changes. In more than one way." Mohawk looked grim from what Jack could tell in the little light there was. "That's why I'm not going to report you even though it can, and most likely will, cost me my job and my life as I know it. Jadah and a couple of others, going well back through the line of our ancestors, have been looking for a way to break the authorities' power for generations."
"A resistance group?"
"Not that organized, really, but you could call it that, I suppose." Mohawk crossed his arms and took a couple of steps away. He turned to look out over the dunes and the ocean. "When you are chosen, by the authorities, to be a Shadow or a Mentor you are taken to the facilities and get a special stamp and an implant. The stamp gives us access to all the information about our subject when they are needed."
"What exactly does that mean? You got the O'Neill 101? A list of food I like, my favorite TV shows, what?"
"It's more complicated than that. What we get beforehand is a basic resume of who you were and what you are supposed to be here. Nothing more. To make contact easier we get to know some of your likings, yes. Our stamp connects with yours and is set to give us data when needed as we interact with our subjects.
"For example, I knew you had a background knowledge about the gods... Goa'uld or the Jaffa... but my stamp wouldn't provide me with any of that knowledge until you mentioned Ra and Bra'tac when I first met you. The time before I started needling you about your stories. When I thought of Bra'tac my shield provided me with some data and let me know who he was. It was very eye opening to know that our Sinner legend is based on the Jaffa. This has given me a piece of history I am very interested in. But only parts of it. I'd like to know more. Your real memories are pretty guarded. Only small bits and pieces slipped over to me when my stamp tried to access the information about Ra and Bra'tac your subconscious carried."
"Sounds complicated," Jack said.
"It is. And I knew you liked men, but had no idea about Daniel until you started talking. about him at..."
"Aht!" Jack raised a warning fingers. "None of your business!"
Mohawk nodded and continued, "Via the stamp the Shadow or the Mentor will notice if there might be a bleed in of unwanted memories."
"Who's the Shadow?" Mohawk had managed to lure Jack in, had almost gotten him laid. Almost. He had liked this guy, for Pete's sake. If this Shadow was someone Jack had called a friend, too, he could only be glad that he hadn't shared his destination with anyone.
"I don't know who your Shadow is."
"You're a lying bastard."
The other man still didn't look at him. "Listen, because this is important. My implant makes it possible for authorities to track me. I'm supposed to stay close to you and make sure you live on happily without a clue. Or report to them should you start remembering. If you leave to find your comrades I will send in reports telling them nothing is wrong with your stamp and that you are living a happy life. That should hopefully close your case and give you the time you need."
Jack snorted. "What about the Shadow guy? He'll know I'm going to leave."
Mohawk's shoulders tensed. "He will keep quiet. He is one of us."
Which confirmed it. He was a lying bastard.
Jack filed away all this information and moved on to the next question on his list. "If you tried to undermine your authorities for years without succeeding, what makes you think you have a foot in the door now?"
"Because you and your people have defeated the Goa'uld and have knowledge of their technology and their ways. Jadah thinks Sam will find a way to free the Sinner of their snakes. She also believes Sam will be able to destroy the venus trap. And you both have a vast knowledge about the gods and their history. That has never happened before with travelers. Authorities are concerned about that as well. Apparently you have killed many of the gods from other worlds and the authorities believe you might deem them evil and try to overcome Ba'th's government."
"But there's no Goa'uld on Ba'th, right? Why do they fear us – aside from the fact that they kidnap people and scramble their brains and that Earth won't make nice with those folks," Jack said. He wished Daniel was here – the fully grown one – to deal with all these facts and details.
"There's no Goa'uld, but the authorities still use the evil god's technology. They probably thought you might frown upon that," Mohawk said.
"Right. Good point. What about you? You and this Yadda know about the Goa'uld now. Aren't they afraid you'd share with others?"
"We only know fragments, not all the details. And we have sworn an oath of secrecy. If we share secret knowledge with outsiders we will be hunted down and memory stamped ourselves. And they will extract from our minds exactly whom we told and then those people will be stamped as well."
"What about that venus trap?" Jack fired off the next question, trying to keep all his ducks in a row. He usually relied on his team to remember all the tricky details and provide him with them when he needed them.
"The portal keeps travelers in a force field and alerts authorities who then transport them directly to the facilities. The system was installed by the gods who ruled here, to bring new slaves to this world and make them compliant without having to torture or force them. It works automatically."
"Well, she's right about one thing. If anyone can de-trap your gate, it's Carter," Jack said. "About that snake business... how many Jaffa we talking about here? I know Teal'c is stuck at a monastery on some weird trip with this whole Sinner legend. Say we can get them all out of there and use them as backup...?"
Mohawk shook his head as he finally faced Jack again. "I don't know. There is a monk among the guards at the monastery who is supposed to work for us, but no one has heard from him in ages. The whole resistance idea is very old and so are most of the people involved. Before you got here no one had come through the portal in generations."
"Great," Jack huffed. "Thanks for the note of confidence."
"I am taking a great risk here. I know about the resistance group because my great-grandfather was part of it and my great-great-grandfather before him. They believed it was wrong to erase people's memories. Their knowledge was passed on to the oldest son or daughter – because they would most likely be recruited as well. My father clued me in about everything when I came of age. But only my great-grandfather could remember that his own father had actually worked as a Mentor. I was recruited when you came through the portal and while I agree that authorities are overstepping the line here, I wasn't willing to risk my career and my life for a resistance group that only existed in people's mind nowadays."
"Until my compelling hotness changed your mind," Jack said, oozing sarcasm.
Mohawk snorted. "It is one thing to theoretically know there are people whose memories are suppressed and replaced by new ones. You think about it and find it odd or even wrong. But you also think that if those people don't actually know what happened to them they are still happy enough, right? It's so abstract. And when you get clued in on the big secret you think; oh, it hasn't happened in ages. It probably won't ever happen again. And you go on with your life and do your thing. And then they suddenly recruit you and present you with the reality of it."
"Rude awakening, was it?"
"Not at first, no. I thought I'd come here with my buddies – who are really just tourists by the way - check you out, get a feeling for who you are. They gave me my stamp with all your data before I left home and I realized we have a mutual friend already, which was a bit of a shock because I had no idea Sam was stamped. We met at the academy and got along fairly well."
Jack felt his eyes narrow. "How well?"
"We were just friends. I don't swing both ways," Mohawk said with a little grin.
Jack's blood pressure went down a notch. But unlike what Mohawk probably thought, it wasn't jealousy that got to him. It was the thought that this guy, who had come on to Jack under false pretense, could have done the same to Carter and hurt her.
He might not feel the bonds that tied him to his people the way he used to, but they were still his team and he didn't like anyone messing with them.
Mohawk said, "But even when I realized Sam was stamped, I wasn't prepared to warn you or do anything about it. Letting her go will be a huge loss. She has great potential to make a difference around here and bring some fresh wind into the dusty, antiquated ways of our people. If she stood up for her beliefs and found a way to make herself heard she could do a lot for this world. She had a breakthrough in improving electricity that would maybe change Ba'th's economy..."
Jack made a whirling motion with his hand. "You can't keep her. Go on – what changed your mind?"
"I spent time with you. I can't explain it, but on the couple of times we met I could almost see the other you underneath. Or at least part of it. There was the way you tended to the local kids. Especially to the little one you took in. I knew you lost a son in your other life and I was wondering if you were still trying to find a way to heal. At first I thought that was good, that it meant you were happier here."
I am, Jack thought with clarity. I'm a lot happier here. And I'm about to throw it all away.
"On our date, when you remembered..."
"Daniel," Jack said flatly and instantly the weird images of blue paint and flowers were back, trying to force themselves into his mind. Squiggles and laughter. Kisses and hot skin on skin.
"Daniel," Mohawk agreed. "You remembered Daniel and my stamp provided me with a multitude of..."
Jack grabbed his upper arm, fingers digging into hard muscles. "What?! What did your stamp tell you about Daniel?"
"It didn't tell me anything about him," Mohawk said softly, "but everything about how you feel about him. And how you are castigating yourself because you think it's your fault he left."
Jack felt his jaw hardening. His whole body went rigid. He knew how he felt about Daniel. That someone had dug into his mind deeply enough to extract it from him was like rape. That Mohawk had dared to access it, that he had seen Jack's most private and intimate feelings... something no one had the right to know. No one except Daniel, maybe, and not even Daniel knew...
"You're dead." His voice was void of any emotion, but his insides were a turmoil of humiliation, rage and agony.
"I reminded you of him," Mohawk went on, not seeing – or no wanting to see – how his life was hanging by a single thread. "At first I was mad. I wanted you and I didn't want you to remember your old life because I really thought we had something going there. But the longer I thought about it the more I understood how this is haunting you, even unconsciously. I decided to leave you be and not dig into that wound any further. I hoped you'd really forget in time. But then people were talking about you leaving and..." He looked at his arm where Jack's fingers were leaving bruises.
Jack let go and Mohawk winced, before he asked, "Is there a chance you'll find him again if you go back to your old life? Is there a chance for you to put this right? Whatever you did – because it's not exactly clear what it was that made him leave or where he went. You probably suppressed it so deeply that I can't get access to it."
He shook his head. His voice was brittle, fading. "I don't know."
Mohawk gave him a fleeting smile. "Well, you better find out then. Here." He handed Jack a small round object.
It was a compass. Ancient compared to Earth technology standards, but in working order. "Go north. Are you going by foot?"
"Train."
"Good. The train will take you to Sa'iidi. Find the town's miller. Tell him Jadah sent you and he'll probably give you a ride to her house. Tell him you're taking your young son to Jadah so she can heal him. Make something up, just nothing contagious. Many people from all over the area go to Jadah; she's a well known herb woman. It won't raise any suspicion. You can rest at her house before taking the last part of your journey. Jadah will give you directions."
"You and this Yadda..."
"Jadah. It's pronounced Je-dah, actually."
"Whatever. How do you communicate? As far as I know there are no phones or radios around here. Yet, you seem to know where my people are right now?"
"Pigeons."
"Pigeons? As in putting tiny notes on a bird's leg and sending it off?"
"They are incredibly fast and need very little rest. Jadah is breeding them. Hers are white. The authorities use colored ones."
"Ah. You don't happen to have one in your pocket so that I can contact Carter?"
"No. And we have to be careful using them. Sometimes they get shot down and if messages fall in the wrong hands it could be fatal."
They fell silent and regarded each other warily. Jack weighed the compass in his hand, Mohawk tilted his head. A light breeze tousled the top of his hair.
"What color is it?" Jack asked.
"What?"
"Your hair. What's today's color?"
Mohawk raised a hand to his hair, then smiled. "Black. It was purple this morning, but I figured it'd be a good idea not to draw any attention to it tonight."
"Smart choice." Jack slid the compass into his pants. "Thanks. I guess."
"What about the boy? How does he play into all this? I know he's connected to Daniel somehow, but again – your mind's hard to crack."
"Need-to-know-basis," Jack said.
He received a nod. "Good luck. I will return home in a week from here to make my final reports. If you can really help your friend, come to Madinah City. Sam knows where to find me. Tell her same place, same time as usual. I will see what I can do to help you to go back through the portal." Mohawk abruptly turned and walked away as quietly as he'd come, swallowed by the night's shadows.
ooo
Jack checked his bundle one last time and made sure he had his stash of money safely in his pocket. Spare clothes, razor knife, soap and towel were wrapped neatly into the rabbit-skin which was tied together by leather strips and a rope. Danny was wearing his cap, his green pants and orange t-shirt. Until a couple of minutes ago he had watched Jack's progress on packing, but then he'd skipped out of the booth.
Jack slung the rope around his left shoulder and made sure his small pot and coffee mug were tied to it properly, along with the water pouch. There was only so much he could carry without the mule, but they'd be a lot faster taking the train.
The kids and Hadis were going to take good care of Thor, but damn, Jack would miss his cranky companion.
Shaking off pointless thoughts of regret, he stepped outside and called for the kid who was... Jack suppressed a groan... not where he was supposed to be. He was about to holler more loudly and search the beach when he heard squeals of laughter from the left. Sure enough he spotted a blond and a red headed tot jumping and rolling down the dunes.
Mania saw him, did a clumsy somersault and landed on her feet. Waving both arms she ran towards him, yelling at the top of her lungs, "I'th came to take you to the twain!"
She slammed into Jack, wrapping her arms around his leg, caking his pants with sand. "That's really... omph!" He stumbled backwards when Danny grabbed his other leg.
"Jack, Jack, Mania came to see us off!"
"Yes... I heard."
"You'th havta huwwy!" She let go and started running around him, flailing arms and all. "Huwwy, huwwy!"
Jack locked the booth and placed the key under a loose floor board of the door step. Viktor would know where to look for it next spring. He had left some of the yard sale stuff for his friend and a note inside, apologizing for not having painted the hut as he'd promised.
"You got your shoes on?" Jack checked to make sure Danny hadn't pulled them off again.
"Yep. And you got yours on." Danny grinned up at him.
"Told ya I would. All right, time to blow this joint. Take point, kids, but watch out for traffic!"
To reach the train station they had to take the boardwalk, away from town. The first morning light reflected in the hotels' windows, creating the illusion of red fire on the panorama of windowpanes.
There was a traffic jam at the Paradise Plaza, a huge white building with many large french doors and fancy baroque towers. Several delivery wagons waited in line for their turn to enter the driveway and move around the hotel to unload their goods.
After dutifully looking left and right, Mania grabbed Danny's hand and they crossed over to take a look at the wagons. The one closest to them carried milk bottles, one oranges and the third was loaded with tomatoes.
The drivers had gathered by a wagon further down the line. They smoked and chatted as they waited. No one paid attention to the by-passers and no one noticed the little girl climbing one of the wagons like a little monkey.
Jack reached them just in time to grab the bottle of milk Mania thrust at him. Then she was down and up the next one in a flash, snatching two oranges. She stuffed them in the large front pockets of her baggy dress and slid down.
Danny's eyes grew big as saucers. "Jack! She..."
Jack reached down and put a finger to his lips, whispering. "Shhh. I'll pay for it."
Danny nodded empathically and Jack pulled a taler from his pants. He placed it in the empty space where the bottle had been.
He tugged at Danny's hand to keep him moving. "All done. C'mon, let's go."
At the frown that met him he refrained from rolling his eyes and left another taler on the coachman seat of the fruit wagon. A fortune for Mania's meager breakfast choice, but he didn't have any small change with him, only taler and some folding money in case he had to buy another mule or horse later on.
However, the last thing he needed was a bunch of angry merchants on their heels. They had to catch that damn train and boarding it was going to be a challenge even without a mob trying to lynch them because of a bottle of milk and two oranges.
"Do you want tomatoes?" Mania asked in a hushed voice.
Jack snatched her by the back of her dress before she could mount the next wagon, and gave her a gentle push. "Not today, we're in a hurry, remember?"
"Ohhh, yettthhh!" She skipped ahead and Danny followed suit.
For a second Jack considered putting the milk back and grabbing his taler, but before he could make up his mind they had passed the last wagon and were on their way.
It was too early for beach goers, but they saw groups of tourists boarding coaches that would take them to the station. That was good. If the platform was busy enough, maybe they could make a smooth get away. Jack had explained the necessity of being quick and keeping a low profile to Danny yesterday.
"Why can't you just buy a ticket?" the bug had asked.
"The train's for rich people only. They won't even let us buy a ticket," Jack had said.
"But that's not fair."
"Nope, but it's the way it is. Only wealthy people get to ride the train. It's very expensive and pure luxury."
Danny had shrugged. "Then we have to make it a Special Ops."
They had discussed the Special Ops plan which was mostly based on them waiting for the right moment and Jack being the one to say when and Danny being the one to climb up to the roof only when Jack said so. Danny had said he could climb up to the roof real fast and make himself as small as an ant so that no one could see him. They would climb on the last wagon just before the train took off so that the chances of being spotted were as minimal as possible.
So much for theory.
The boardwalk took a sharp left turn away from the beach and they spotted the first sign that read: Ba'th Town Train Station. And a smaller sign underneath: No begging, no trespassing.
A moment later they crossed the wide sandy square that served as the parking space for horse carriages, buggies and the large merchant wagons. Danny's head started doing the swiveling motion again and Jack quickly took his hand to keep him close and to make sure he didn't end up underneath a carriage.
Mania tugged at his arm. "Gimme my bottle, pleeth."
He handed it down to her, a "Careful, don't drop it," on his lips, but never got around to saying it. She grabbed it, then planted a big soggy smacker on Danny's lips and was gone.
The star child raised a hand to his mouth, letting out a soft, "Ohhh."
"That sealed it, you gotta marry her now," Jack smirked as he swung Danny up. "Okay, let's do this. You ready?"
At Danny's nod Jack turned right and rounded the small white washed railway building. Peering around the corner he had a good view of the platform and was pleased to see it was pretty crowded with departing tourists and luggage. The train was already there, its massive black steam engine puffing out small clouds of white smoke.
Jack counted four red-painted carriages coupled together. Each one had a ladder at its back, leading to the top. Suitcases and crates were tied to the roofs of the first three cars and more luggage was being added by two railway workers. The last wagon was reserved for merchant goods from the cities and other freight. Going by the closed doors and the wooden boxes stacked at the far end of the platform it had already been unloaded. Good. No one would pay attention to an empty freight wagon.
Jack put Danny down, took his hand and hurried them over to hide behind those boxes. He suppressed a curse when he saw two railway attendants in their blue uniforms and golden insignia patrolling the platform to make sure no one snuck on. They came from opposite directions so there was little chance they'd both turn their back on Jack's position anytime soon.
He considered converting to Plan B and taking the night train. But the night train only went during the high main season when day trippers came to enjoy the ocean and leave at night. Vacationers traveled home by day, not by night.
"Jack, look," Danny called out. "There's Mania. And Mikele. And Ranja. And..."
"Shhh, We need to be quiet, remember?"
"...and Masala and Paolo," Danny whispered.
He was right. Jack craned his neck to get a better view of the group of people forging onto the platform. The attendants immediately stopped patrolling and went to shoo them away, but Masala started talking to them, gesturing wildly.
What the hell...?
Then Mania slipped away from the group and ran down the platform, laughing and waving her bottle of milk.
"She stole it from me," Masala yelled after her. "Little useless thief! Get a hold on her!"
Ranja ran after his sister, followed by Mikele and Paolo. They were all yelling and drawing the attention of every single person, workers and passengers alike, to them. One of the railway guys started chasing them, the other barked at Masala to get off the platform. Masala threw up her arms, lamenting loudly about the milk being needed to feed her baby. She put on quite a show, even slapping the guy on the arm and screaming for Law Enforcement.
"Get her, get her, or let me get her! I need the milk! I cannot go home without it! What will my husband think! What will he do! The baby needs the milk! Get her, get her!" She grabbed the attendant's hands and shook them, "Please, oh, please, my milk, my baby, oh please!"
"Get off, woman! It is not my concern that you lowly folks breed like rabbits!" the attendant barked.
At the far end of the platform Mania dropped the bottle in full run. It hit the pavement, crashed and broke into a hundred little pieces, freeing rivers of milk.
The flustered attendant managed to get out of Masala's clutches and joined his colleague. They were standing there, cursing and raving about the mess. Finally one of them went after the kids who were long gone. The other one yelled for someone to clean up the mess.
Jack had started moving when Mania dropped the bottle. He gave Danny a boost up the ladder of the freight wagon and was about to follow the kid when a light tap on the shoulder had him spin around and almost strike at whoever was trying to stop him.
"It's me!" Hadis hissed and, instead of being handcuffed and arrested, Jack had a rucksack shoved into his chest. He grabbed it and raised a questioning eyebrow. Hadis smirked, his beard twitching. "Masala fears you or the boy might starve. She said to wish you well."
"Tell her thanks," Jack said, meaning it. He hadn't been able to take more than a loaf of bread and summer sausage with them. Whatever was in the pack would enhance their meals tenfold.
"There's something else in the pack. You should open it soon, but not until Ba'th is out of sight and you are in the open range. Good luck." With that Hadis ducked out of sight and Jack climbed up the ladder.
By the time the ruckus over the spilled milk was over, he and Danny were flat on their bellies, the warm wooden planks of the roof underneath them.
Someone was cleaning up the broken bottle, Masala had left the stage and there was no sight of the kids. People went back to tending to their own business and boarding the train.
"Good. They got away," Jack muttered, grateful for the diversion they'd created. "Reckless little buggers." But he knew he didn't need to worry; they were way too smart to get caught.
Iron guardrails, supposed to keep luggage from tumbling down even if the ropes loosened, hid them from prying eyes as long as they kept their heads down. Danny started squirming next to him and Jack put a hand on his back. "You all right, buddy?"
"Ah-huh, I'm just so ex-cit-ed! When does it start, Jack? Will the locomotion whistle when it takes off? Will it go fast or slow?" Danny pressed his hands to his mouth, stage-whispering. "Am I making too much noise? I can't remember being on top of a train ev-er. I don't even know when was the last time I took a train at all. People in China and India ride on top of their trains 'cause there're too many people and the train's too small."
Jack rubbed his hand up and down Danny's back to calm him a little, but he had to smile. "I don't think they can hear you down there. Just stay right here next to me so they can't see you. And cover your ears – that whistle is going to blow them off."
Danny threw his arms over his head, pressing his nose to the roof, and giggled. "I need my ears!"
"Yep. Hold on to them."
They heard doors being slammed and someone announcing the departure of the train, then there was a shrill whistle from the railway attendant. The train lurched, the engines hissed and spat out more smoke.
"Now," Danny squealed.
The train started rumbling and the engine trumpeted long and earsplittingly loud. As they picked up speed, the head wind carried smoke over to them and Jack yelled at Danny to keep his head down. They still ended up coughing until the smoke drifted off a moment later.
Jack raised his head in time to see Ba'th Town Station one last time, with the hotels and the ocean in the background. The platform and its buildings became smaller and they passed foothills of the town, the orchards and pastures, the hill with the ruins on top, towering over all of it like an ancient giant.
He sat up, pulling Danny with him to sit between his outstretched legs. Together they watched the landscape slide by. The boy raised a hand and waved an enthusiastic goodbye and Jack wondered if Danny realized that he might never see his friends again. Which led to the question what was going to happen to the star child once they were ready to go home.
Bridges to cross later, Jack thought.
"Jack, what's in the pack?"
Danny surged forward to scramble to his feet, but Jack had a dead hold on him. "Aht! What's the first rule about riding train tops?"
"Oh! No sudden moves and no wandering around." A frown followed that statement. "Do I have to sit here for hours and hours?"
Jack bent forward and reached past Danny to grab the pack by one of its straps. "I'm afraid we both do, kiddo. Let's make the best of it and take a look at what's in here." He placed the pack before them and opened it, then quickly closed it again when a white head pushed out and a sharp beak tried to pick at his hand.
"Jack! There's a birdie in it. Can we let it out?"
Instantly remembering Mohawk's warning about how pigeons sometimes got shot down he shook his head. "Not yet. We have to wait until we're far enough from the town."
"Why's there a birdie in our pack?" Danny tugged at the leather flap and Jack pulled his hands away.
"It's a messenger. You know, with a ring on its leg where you can put a small letter?"
"A homing pigeon. They were used in ancient Greece to announce the winner of the Olympics and they were used in wars to carry messages through enemy lines," Danny said thoughtfully, drawing information from his big self somehow.
Jack had noticed him doing that before, but he had no idea if Danny was using Daniel's memories or knowledge consciously or if it just surfaced randomly.
"That's right. Hadis gave it to me." Which answered the question of Jack's Shadow. At least it narrowed it down to Hadis or Masala. Somehow he was less shocked or surprised than he'd thought he would be. He wasn't sure how he felt about it, but it was a moot point to dwell. In the long run the only thing that mattered was that they were on the right side.
"Will it be okay in there? When can we let it go and what message is it going to take to whom?"
"I think it'll be okay in there for a little while longer. The message is probably to let someone know we're coming."
"Sam?"
"A friend of hers. Someone who knows where she is and can help us to find her."
"You have to check it first to make sure it's not a trap," Danny advised him sternly.
"Yes, sir." Jack saluted and for some reason the kid thought it was hilarious.
They sat and watched corn and pumpkin patches. They saw farm houses and large barns. On some fields the rye or corn stood still high, others had already been cropped. Flat farmland. The only change in scenery were grazing cows or horses on green pastures.
"Just like Kansas," Jack mused.
"Don't you wish we could click our heels threes time to go home and all be together again?" Danny asked. "You and me and Sam and Teal'c and Daniel."
"You think that's possible?" Jack resisted the need to look back and check if he could still see his ruins in the distance. "You think Daniel could come back?"
"Sure, if he wanted to. I wanted to come back to you and I could. He just has to ask Oma," Danny said, all confidence.
"How come he couldn't come all the way back?"
Maybe the real question here was; did Daniel even want to return from glowy land? And if he did, what exactly did that mean? Was it up to Jack where to take it from there?
Or had that particular ship sailed a long time ago?
As if he had read Jack's mind, the boy said, "Daniel doesn't know if he wants to come back all the way. He likes being in the stars. Kinda." After a moment of thought, he added. "But he wanted to help you guys and The Others wouldn't allow him to interfere."
"Ah."
"I'm very small so I could slip under their radar. That's why Oma split us."
And if the rest of Daniel came back, wouldn't he need that small part added to him again? Jack's brain hurt from even trying to imagine how this was all possible. But if the munchkin thought he and Daniel could co-exist, then maybe... who knew?
"Danny?"
Danny was playing with his laces again, pulling them open and trying to tie them. "Jack?"
"Can you..." Jack wasn't sure how to ask without making it sound weird. He decided there was just no way to not make it sound weird. "Can you call Daniel? Can you actually... talk to him?"
"He's with Sam now. I think he didn't like you trying to make babies with funny-hair-guy." Suddenly Danny let go of his laces and stared at Jack open mouthed.
Jack stared back at him, probably the same dumb expression on his face. "Babies? What?"
"Jack! Mania kissed me on my lips! Do you think I could have a baby now?!"
Oy. Houston... we have a problem. Jack closed his mouth and cleared his throat. He desperately tried not to laugh. "Danny, you don't make babies like that. Not when you kiss."
Danny frowned. "Daniel said that, too. And he said to ask you about it."
"Oh, he did, did he?" Son of a... "Well, kissing doesn't lead to babies. No worries."
"Oh. Okay." Much to Jack's relief he went back to playing with his laces.
For about a minute.
"Jack?"
Uh-oh. "Mmmh?"
"Is it true that boys can't make babies at all?"
"Well, two boys can't. You need a woman to make babies. And you both have to be adults to make it work." He desperately hoped that solved the issue for the little guy because he wasn't prepared to explain what went where and how – in kiddie-terms.
"Sha're and Daniel could've had a baby then but not you and Daniel or you and funny-hair-guy," Danny processed thoughtfully.
"Right."
"Is that 'cuz two guys can't love each other?" Danny had stopped fiddling with his laces and looked up at Jack with open curiosity. "That's why you wouldn't wanna marry funny-hair! Oh! I remember it just now... You said guys don't love guys. They just..."
He knew the next word that would come out of the boy's mouth and he just couldn't let him say it. It was wrong on too many levels to have a four year old say 'fuck'. He put a finger on Danny's lips to shush him and hurried to deliver an explanation.
"No! It's got nothing to do with that. See, guys just don't have the physical, uh, capability to make it work. It needs a woman to carry the baby in her belly and to, um, give birth to it. And no, before you ask, a Jaffa man can't have babies either. The pouch isn't like a womb, it's different."
Danny chewed on his bottom lip as he sorted it out in his mind. Finally he said, "I used to know about this stuff, right? About the babies and the sex? Well, Daniel does, anyway."
"Maybe you really don't need to know as long as you're," Jack shrugged, "little?"
"Oh, maybe you're right." The frown evened out and Danny smiled.
Jack tied the kid's laces and said, "Why don't we take care of our pigeon now?"
"YES! It must be scared all alone in the pack!"
They were still surrounded by corn and rye, but less and less farms. In the distance Jack could make out trees and rolling hills. He hoped it was safe enough to release the messenger now. Carefully, he opened the bag and closed his hand around the bird. He felt the fast fluttering heartbeat and the rustling of feathers between his fingers. But the pigeon didn't try to escape or fight when he pulled it out of the pack and showed it to Danny. He cupped both hands around it and it held perfectly still.
"There is a thing on its leg," Danny observed.
"That's where the message is in."
"Can I, please?" Short fingers, itching to open the tube, reached for the bird's leg.
Jack was about to say no, but changed his mind as he realized that Danny had an advantage because of his small hands. It would be easier for him to open the tube and get the message out than for Jack. "You have to be very careful and not let go of the paper. If we lose it, we can't get it back," he warned.
"I know."
Crooning to the pigeon, Danny gently took its leg and opened the tube. With nimble fingertips he removed a rolled scroll and closed his fist around it. "Got it."
"Good work. Can you read it?"
He nodded and, as carefully as if he was handling a raw egg, he unrolled the paper. "It has today's date on it and it says; arriving 4 dinner 2day. That's all."
"Plain and simple. Nice."
"You don't think it's a trap then, right?" Danny asked.
Jack didn't think so, but of course he couldn't be 100 % positive. He believed Hadis was on his side and that the bird was to let Jadah know they were on their way. But it could as well be a message for someone else, like the authorities, to let them know when they'd arrive in Sa'iidi. But Mohawk had said the pigeons of Sam's Mentor were white.
This was definitely a white pigeon.
"It's not a trap. Put it back in."
Danny complied and double checked that the tube was closed before he let go of the bird's leg. Then he brushed a tender finger over the pigeon's white head. "Look how pretty she is," he whispered. "D'you think she has a name, Jack?"
"No idea. But you could ask its owner when we get there."
As if the pigeon knew her time for take off had come it started to squirm in Jack's hands and, with a little upward push, he let it go. It flattered in front of them for a moment, then found its balance and soared away with the wind.
Danny waved and called after it to be careful and, "God speed!"