"I can't believe you guys just did that; breaking up the group on national TV. Really" Carlotta fumed as they walked back to the dressing room.
"So, you two just had this planned without even bothering to talk to me about it" Star said heatedly, glancing between Alex and Simone.
"Why does it even matter" Alex fired back. "You just got off tour as a solo artist and you're gearing up for a European tour, again as a solo artist".
"And you were supposed to be on both tours, but you wouldn't stop hating".
"No, no one is hating on your one hit wonder ass". Alex rolled her eyes and looked away from Star. Just the sight of her was making her agitated.
"Even if we wanted to stay in a group with your ass, what do you expect us to do while you're on tour, Star" Simone asked.
"I'm working on getting you back in Sound house's good graces. By the time the European tour starts, both of you should be invited back".
"This is the first I'm hearing this". Simone turned to Carlotta. "Tell me Ms. C, has Star mentioned anything about working on getting me and Alex back on tour".
Carlotta sighed. She didn't want to say anything that would drive the girls further apart but she also couldn't bear to lie. Lies were what has kept her and Cotton at odds for so long. "No, I haven't".
"I didn't tell anyone. I wanted to make sure there was a deal in place before I said anything" Star explained, feeling hurt at the look of doubt on everyone's faces. She knew she hadn't always made the best decisions where others were concerned, but for them to doubt her word really ate at her.
Alex had heard enough. Star liked the spotlight and probably loved the fact that she no longer had to share it. She would respect Star more if she just owned it instead of acting like she still cared about the group. Fame was what she wanted and now she had it. Even if Star was telling the truth, Alex knew she wouldn't be able to tour so late in her pregnancy. "This whole conversation is irrelevant. Sound house could roll out the red carpet and I still wouldn't go on tour. I'm back in Atlanta to wrap up a few loose ends and then I'm driving back across the country. Cali is my new home".
"What" Carlotta said, taken off guard. "No, Alex. You can't do that. This is your home; you belong here with us".
"Miss C, I love you; and I'll miss you. I'll miss Atlanta. But career wise, there's nothing left for me here. I need a fresh start".
Simone looked stunned. During their many talks, Alex had never once mentioned her life in California was permanent. Though they had both decided to leave Take3 behind, she'd assumed they'd both be in Atlanta going forward. "Why didn't you tell me" Simone asked.
"I didn't want you to convince me to stay" Alex admitted. "And I knew if I gave you enough time, you would wear me down. But I can't stay. This last year has been…I can't stay". Alex stopped talking to keep her voice from cracking.
"If this has anything to do with Noah..." Carlotta started.
"It doesn't" Alex quickly cut her off. The last thing she needed was to discuss the man she couldn't erase from her memory; the man who kept her up most nights; the man whose seed she carried inside her body. "Like I said, I need a fresh start and a little time to figure out what I really want".
"No, you already know what you really want. You want to be the hottest music producer in the game and make a name for yourself, so you can stop living in your father's shadow. I think it's pathetic that you up and quit every time things get a little hard" Star ranted. "You're always getting in your own way".
"Don't pretend you know me. Having money didn't prevent me from having an alcoholic mother or a narcissistic father who was too concerned with himself to pay me any attention. Just because I don't broadcast my dysfunctional childhood every five seconds to gain sympathy doesn't mean I didn't have it hard. You have no clue what I've gone through, so I'll be damned if I let you make me feel guilty for making a decision to better my life. Just because it's not what you want doesn't mean I quit. This petty situation isn't even hard, it's just toxic and I refuse to be a part of it any longer". Alex grabbed her chest and took a moment to catch her breath. She was so irritated; she was beginning to feel queasy.
Star took a step back like she'd been slapped in the face. Alex's reaction had caught her off guard; she'd never seen the ice queen speak so passionately.
"You might not be quitting, but you're definitely running away from something" Carlotta said quietly, interrupting the abrupt silence. She studied Alex more carefully. Something was not right. Alex never let Star's words affect her that deeply.
"What" Alex exclaimed, trying her hardest not to fidget. She could sense Miss C watching her like a hawk, looking for the smallest hint of a lie. "What are you talking about? What could I possibly be running from"?
"I don't know, but something has you spooked. And you're trying to leave town as soon as possible to keep us from figuring it out".
Alex felt like a caged bird; she wanted to rub her belly but that would be an instant giveaway. She could also feel a panic attack rising but didn't want to let it show. Holding her breath in an attempt to push it down, she silently began to hyperventilate.
"Alex, are you okay" Simone said, walking over to Alex.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I… I…. excuse me". Covering her mouth, Alex ran from the dressing room to the nearest bathroom. Dashing into the first available stall, she emptied the contents of her stomach; and when her stomach was empty, she dry-heaved so hard she collapsed into a full-blown panic attack. How had her life gotten so far off track? Would she ever get over Noah? How was she supposed to raise a child on her own? Would she be a good mother? Tears streamed down Alex's face like a river and each precious breath became harder to inhale. She could feel her lungs failing her. Alex was so panicked, she didn't even notice when Simone and Carlotta entered the bathroom to check on her.
"Oh my God, Alex" Simone shouted, rushing to Alex's side. "Alex, calm down. Everything will be OK".
"You've got to breathe" Carlotta said, rubbing Alex's back to soothe her. "Just breathe, Alex".
"I…I ca… can't" Alex gasped.
"Yes, you can" Carlotta said patiently, continuing to rub her back. Her motherly instincts kicking in, she pulled Alex towards her and enfolded her in a cocoon-like hug. Gently, Carlotta rocked her back and forth until her breathing slowed and she went still. "That's it, everything is going to be okay" she whispered.
Grabbing a couple of paper towels, Simone turned on the bathroom sink and wet them with cool water. Carefully, she dabbed Alex's face as Miss C continued to hold her. "That's better" she said, trying to be strong for her friend and hold back her own tears. She'd never seen Alex in such a state of disarray. It scared her. "Alex, what is going on with you"?
Alex shook her head slowly, but didn't answer. She was afraid if she opened her mouth again, she would start crying or hyperventilating, or both.
"Let's go sit down in the dressing room, give you a chance to get some air and relax". Guiding her gently out the bathroom door, Carlotta kept her arm wrapped around Alex as they walked down the corridor, Simone accompanying them. When they reached the room, Star was nowhere to be found. Placing Alex gently in a chair, she and Simone sat in chairs across from her. Giving her enough space so she wouldn't feel crowded, they patiently waited. Carlotta wished she could instantly take Alex's pain away. Over the last two years, Alex had become another daughter to her. To see her sitting there looking like a lost and lonely little girl broke her heart. "Alex you have to talk, let it out. It's not healthy to hold your feelings inside like this" Carlotta urged, when it became apparent Alex would never speak. She had an inkling she knew what was going on now. The signs were there and it had become obvious when she'd embraced Alex in a tight hug.
Alex still didn't say anything. She looked down at her lap and continuously wrung her hands.
"Come on Alex, talk to us. You know you can trust us" Simone implored.
"I have nothing to tell" Alex whispered, her stubbornness refusing to let her lean on her makeshift family. She was determined to leave town and deal with her problems on her own.
Realizing Alex would never come clean without being forced, Carlotta decided to take matters into her own hands. "How many weeks are you" she asked quietly.
Alex's head shot up, her eyes went wide with surprise, and her mouth gaped open.
"How many weeks? What are you talking about Miss C" Simone asked, confused. Her head toggled back and forth between Alex and Carlotta.
"Alex is pregnant, Simone. And if I had to guess, it's Noah's baby".
"No, she isn't. If Alex was pregnant, I would know. She would have told me; right, Alex"?
"Like she told you she was moving to California" Carlotta pointed out.
"Alex" Simone implored, wanting an answer.
"Simone… I… I'm sorry" Alex apologized, finally speaking up. For some odd reason, now that the cat was out of the bag, she felt a small sense of relief. It finally calmed her down.
"So, you are pregnant. And you were going to run away and not tell anyone"?
"It's my problem to deal with".
"When are you going to finally realize that we're family, Alex?! Your problems are our problems. You don't have to go through difficult times by yourself. We love you" Simone ranted.
"That's right" Carlotta said. "Babies aren't easy either. You're going to need all the help you can get".
"I know you guys love me and I love you too. But I can do this on my own. It's how it has to be".
"No, it doesn't. You just don't want to face Noah. He has a right to know about his child. How far along are you"?
Alex wanted to argue with Miss C and say she wasn't running from Noah, but couldn't form the words because she knew it would be a lie. That's exactly what she was doing. She didn't know how she would react if or when she saw him; hopefully, Alex would get out of town before they encountered each other. So, instead of arguing, she just answered the question. "Nineteen weeks".
"What" Simone gasped.
Carlotta just nodded. "I figured you had to be pretty far along. When I hugged you, I could feel your baby bump".
"I still don't believe it. Take that sweater off, so I can see" Simone demanded.
"Really, Simone"?
"NOW"!
Sighing and rolling her eyes, Alex stood and did as requested. Discarding her sweater vest, she pulled her dress taut against her stomach.
"Oh my God! Girl, you are super pregnant. I can't believe it; I'm going to be an Auntie"! Simone ran to Alex and hugged her tightly.
Caught by surprise, Alex laughed and hugged her back.
Stepping back, Simone looked down at Alex's growing belly. "Can I"?
Alex nodded and smiled when Simone touched her bump.
"I cannot wait to meet this little one" She beamed.
"I can't believe one of my babies is having a baby" Carlotta cooed, as she came over and touched Alex's bump too.
"How did you manage to keep it a secret for this long" Simone asked.
"I didn't know I was pregnant until after the plane crash. And after that, I went to California. The only person who found out was Derek because he came after me".
"How did he take it" Carlotta asked.
"Understandably, he was hurt. But he's been really supportive and pushing me to open up. He even offered to go back to Cali with me. I told him no. He knows we're just friends but I think spending time apart will give it a chance to really sink in. Maybe, he'll finally meet someone else. He deserves to be happy; especially after all I put him through".
"You deserve to be happy. Just because you made a few mistakes doesn't make you a bad person. So, you need to take the advice you gave Derek and stop getting in the way of your own happiness. You need to tell Noah about the baby" Simone said.
"You guys don't need to worry. The baby and I are going to be fine out in Cali. And I promise to come back and visit when I can" Alex said, ignoring Simone's words.
"Alexandra, stop being so stubborn and listen" Carlotta admonished. "You have to tell Noah about his child. He has a right to know. Otherwise, you're going to have a child that grows to resent you when they learn you purposely kept them from their father. I'm speaking from experience. You're about to be a mother; it's time to grow up".
"I'm trying to be an adult and make the best decisions for my child, buy you guys won't let me. Just because you don't like my decision doesn't mean it's the wrong choice for me. I've moved on from that part of my life and it's not my problem if you can't accept it".
"If you've moved on, then how come every time you hear Noah's name you look like you're about to cry and try to change the subject. How come you won't even mention him by name"?
"Because, I've moved on" Alex yelled. "Bringing him up takes me into the past and I'm looking towards the future". She'd had enough of their interrogation. Pulling her sweater back on, Alex grabbed her things and quickly left the dressing room.
"Alex, wait" Simone said, chasing after her. She didn't have to go far; a second later she bumped into Alex who had come to a complete stop in the middle of the hallway. She had been in such a hurry to run away from Noah and any mention of him, she'd come face to face with him
Alex felt her heart rate increase as she stared at Noah standing at the end of the hall. How could Noah look even sexier in person than her memories of him? How was she going to avoid him now? Did she really want to? Alex could feel her feet itching to run into Noah's arms instead of away from him. It was like the words she'd just spoken about moving on didn't exist. Alex could see a similar battle going on behind Noah's eyes. Maybe she should talk to him; but right before her feet began to move, Star came from seemingly out of nowhere and walked up to Noah. Looking down at her, he didn't resist when she grabbed his face and pulled it towards hers. Their lips touched as they embraced in a passionate kiss and Alex felt the ground beneath her feet begin to shift before everything went black.