Chapter 3: "Just. Think more about…things from now on…"

AT KYLE'S PARTY LATER THE SAME NIGHT

Rory walks upstairs and finds Jess sitting in an empty bedroom.

"There you are." Rory says finally having located Jess after looking everywhere downstairs.

"Hey." Jess looks up from the chair.

"I've been looking all over for you." Rory steps into the room.

"Just got tired of everything down there."

"Are we allowed to be up here? I mean, Kyle was kind of discouraging it." She locks the door and goes further into the room.

"When you have a party, you get what you get."

"Yeah, I guess." She finally sees his face and can't help feeling there's something going on with him. She brushes her hand over his face as he leans into her touch. "Sad boy, what's wrong? You were looking forward to this party, what happened?"

"Nothing." His voice is distant.

"Something did. Come on, tell me". She pushes, while Jess leans in for a kiss.

"You're not tired of me, are you?"

Jess leans in for another kiss, this time lifting his hands to touch her face trying to prove to her that it is not her, it's never her. How could he ever get tired of her…

"That's a pretty good answer." She nods.

They kiss again, this time deepening the kiss. Jess slowly moves them down on the bed holding Rory steady with one hand carefully placed behind her back. Before the movement registers in Rory's over active brain, the soft touches from Jess and warm sensations in her stomach makes her move which naturally makes more room for Jess to place himself steadily on top of her. Suddenly they are both kissing with more fervor than they have before, and soon Jess is slowly rocking them both in a pace both unfamiliar and wonderful at the same time. As Jess starts trailing kisses down Rory's neck while trying to unbuckle her belt, the jig is up. With the sudden supply of air, Rory's back to thinking and that means there can't be any belt removal at this moment, not only will her key fall on the floor but, this. cant. happen. here.

"Jess, wait." Jess keeps fiddling with her belt, already feeling some of the tension in his body relieving, making him overhear Rory's pleading sounds . . . "Jess, wait. . ."

"Jess!" Rory jumps of the bed and away from him.

"Jeez." Jess sneers. Regretting it the second he utters the words.

"Not here, not now." Rory pleads.

"Sorry."

"You did not think that it was going to happen like this, did you?" She half yells half whispers.

Jess looks down. "I don't know what I think anymore."

"Jess."

He remains quiet. His glance is glued to his shoes, not daring to look Rory in the eyes. A long pause goes by without anyone speaking.

Jess finally breaks the silence. "Im sorry… that was a pretty jackass move I made there."

"Yes, it was." She looks down and then back up to him. Lowering her voice she says. "I was partially to blame though…"

Jess's looks at her. "No, Rory. That was all me, I shouldn't have pushed you. It's just that…" He stops himself. Pouring out details about his horrible day would not make this thing here any better.

"It's what? Jess?"

"It's not you, Rory. It's just that I had a lot on my mind, and tried to… " Jess stops again.

"What Jess?" She steps closer to him, once again touching his chin, feeling him tense under her touch.

Jess breathes inn, looking at her first then the roof before producing a reader's digest version of the truth in his mind, hoping it will pass with her. Secretly knowing it won't. "I… today… I had a pretty interesting day…" Yup. This won't do.

"Oh, what happened?" Rory pushes, looking him deep in the eyes.

Jess looks down again. Rory pushes his chin up again forcing him to look back.

"I went to buy the prom tickets like I told you I would and…"

Rory suddenly worries after hearing the word prom and seeing his broken face. She turns away from his face for a moment, breathing in deeply and preparing herself to hear the next words to come out of his mouth…

"And… I got them. The interesting part was the talk I had, or more or less was forced to have with Principle Merton…

"Oh, what… what did he say?"

"He told me I was graduating…" His face goes blank.

Rory confused at what part of the talk was considered bad news, carefully and almost whispers a reply. "And? The bad part of that is?

Jess shrugs, not knowing quite where to begin or how to even… He takes another deep breath before continuing.

"Uh, it surprised him…and it surprised me too…" Jess swallows hard.

Rory still not fully understanding the brooding aspect of this piece of information. Decides to change the subject in a hurry, hoping it will make Jess feel more comfortable with sharing, as she feels like there's more to the story than just him having a talk with the ever so annoying Principle Merton.

Rory prepares herself and dives right in. "You know about what happened or… almost…happened…before…this"…she points at them both and then the bed. - "…talk."

Jess finally looks up at her. "Yeah?"

"I was thinking… I am ready."

Still not sure of what Rory was talking about Jess nods. "For what?"

"For it."

"I thought being vague was my thing… for what Rory?"

Rory looks away again, carefully saying the next words into the air, not moving. "For… Sex". The last part said with a lower voice.

Jess almost falls off the dresser he had been leaning against, and tries to stable his feet. He lifts his hands up to meet her face and moves her chin so that she's looking at him again.

"I think I want it to happen at prom." Her voice still low.

Jess still surprised at the turn this conversation took, almost stutters. "At….prom?"

Rory suddenly aware of the insinuation her previous statement made, tries to recover. "No, not at prom, prom…but after…you know on prom night."

Jess chuckles, coming up with various remarks on how clichés seem to be every stars hollow residents theme of the day, holds back not wanting to screw anything else up…

Rory senses his smirk. "And yes, I already know the originality behind the deal, Grease was mentioned but Lane said…." Rory stops.

Jess smirks again, kind of amused at the thought of Lane and Rory discussing their future…uhm plans…

He tries on a serious face and continues. "Lane said?"

Slightly flushed Rory bites her lip. "I discussed it with Lane, and well, as much of a cliché it might be… it still fits timing wise, I mean I am leaving for Europe right after graduation… and you… I don't know… and…" Suddenly ranting, Jess stops her and leans in for a kiss.

"What was that for?"

"Uh, for you?"

Suddenly impatient Rory quips. "What, Jess, ok… but please just talk to me."

Here he was, back to avoiding the big picture. And here Rory Gilmore was telling him that she wanted to sleep with him, and all he could do was try to force her to bed with him, offering no explanations whatsoever… This day was making his guilt pile up like Mcdonald's must have done for vegans everywhere…

"I'm sorry. And about before…" He takes a break and brushes a piece of hair off her face, tucking it behind her ear.

Jess breathes in. "It's just that ever since Merton told me I was lucky enough to even be graduating, I've been having this grave feeling of not earning this…" He takes a break. "I mean, I hardly even went to school! And the times I went, I was sitting in the back reading something completely irrelevant to the class… I even came to take a test without a freaking pencil… who does that and gets away with it?"

Jess takes another deep breath.

"And, then I get to graduate because I somehow managed to meet the minimal requirements? I am damn lucky, and I am a jerk for understanding that now. What would I do if I didn't graduate? Would you still wanna go to prom with me? Jess says with a sudden edge.

Rory breathes in as she suddenly understands the brooding and all over angst she's been sensing from him all evening. He doesn't feel like he deserves any of this, and he knows he almost blew it, just lucking out at the last minute. It must be eating him up that his carefree attitudes almost made him flunk out, making his way of life suddenly doubtful… the only difference is, it didn't. He was graduating.

Rory looks apologetically at him. "Jess, you graduating or not graduating doesn't change anything. Of course I would still wanna be with you…"

"You sure?" He looks down again.

"Yes. I'm sure. And I get it; you're angry at yourself, just… just don't block me or the rest of the world out… You were lucky once, now you know and you can be different the next time…"

Jess looks up at her.

"But, right now you're here and we are fine. Just. Think more about…things from now on."

Jess smiles. "That was eloquently put, Ms. Gilmore."

Rory glares at him, slapping his shoulder.

"Ok ok, I get it. And I will… think more…about things." He repeats her words while smirking just to poke fun of her more than easy put advice. Advice that obviously had more meaning to them than he would like to admit.

"And now that I know how much thought you have given our future, or some parts of our future at least." Jess grins. "I will gladly start doing the same…" Jess smirks and pulls her in for another kiss.

They deepen the kiss until Rory breaks it.

"So we're good?" Rory asks blushing.

"Yes, and uhm, thanks"

Rory not following. "Thanks for what?"

"For being the first person all day to not be shocked about my impending high school graduation."

Rory smiles. "Aw, well I have always known you could do it. I'm just happy your attendance record wasn't like Tammy Bakers'."

"Tammy who?"

"She's just a girl at Chilton who flunked out after showing up like 4 days this last semester."

Feeling the guilt pile back on Jess nods. "Oh."

"Anyways, forget about that and your welcome" Sensing his tense frame, she leans in and for the first time that evening Rory kisses Jess first.

Breaking the kiss, Rory smiles again. "Now about prom…."

To be continued…

AN:Thank you "guest" for being my first and only reviewer! Now come on people, tell me what you think. I don't mind some brutal honesty, so bring it ;)