The aftermath of the party was, in a word: explosive. Because of his interference with her sound system, Jubilee had taken her revenge by using her ability to set off sparks in Tony's suit. This had escalated into a prank war. Tony had retaliated by hacking Kitty Pryde's computer and replacing her entire music library with "Everybody Wants to Be a Cat." The increased visits between the institute and the tower had led to both places turning into continuous battle grounds. Bruce had JARVIS lockdown his lab and his floor. He couldn't risk a miscalculated prank unleashing the other guy
He was grateful for his foresight on the day that Iceman and Pyro paid a visit to the tower. Tony had apparently created a nano drone to follow Bobby around and play "Do you want to Build a Snowman?"
"Get rid of it Stark or I'll turn you into a white walker."
"You can't kill me; there must always be a Stark in Winterfell. Drake, you need to chill and just…Let it go."
Tony had been spending his morning picking up objects only to have them stick to his skin because they were frozen or sitting in a chair and having to jump up immediately because it was burning. Bobby had also turned the penthouse into an ice rink.
Bruce was working on a DNA sample when Clint dropped in from the airvents.
"Hey Dr. B. How's science?"
Bruce raised an eyebrow, but didn't lift his head from his microscope. "Quiet."
"Hope it's okay to drop in, but I needed to sit somewhere where my butt wouldn't burn off." He sat in one of the chairs and smirked. "So, word on the street is that you're getting chummy with a certain weather witch."
"Word on the street or in the airvents?" Bruce kept his voice expressionless, but inside he was fighting to quiet the Hulk. At the mention of Storm the other guy had begun pushing to be let out.
"I'm trapped in here until Stark makes nice with Queen Elsa and Lava girl." Clint frowned as an explosion for the floor above resonated in the lab. "Which could take a while." He sighed. "The least you could do is give me some good gossip to pass the time."
"Why don't you just hide in the airvents like you usually do when Thor decides to summon lightning at the brunch table?"
"Because it's a minefield up there." Clint leaned back in his chair. "Nowhere is safe; Drake froze most of them. I've got frostbite in unmentionable places. So spill; I want details."
"There's nothing to gossip about." Bruce said firmly. This wasn't strictly true. He and Ororo had been in communication since the party. They had been too busy to meet in person, but they video chatted almost every night and texted each other throughout the day. They'd talked about her visiting the tower and Bruce hoped she'd be able to come soon. The way the collaboration between the two teams was going; Tony would probably ban all X-Men from the Tower…though he'd probably wait until after he got them to undo what they'd done to JARVIS. Someone had hacked the AI and reprogramed it to speak with a southern accent. Tony had been furious because he'd been unable to figure out how they'd managed to override his security protocols. Bruce had a suspicion that the culprit was Rogue. She had the best motive, after all Tony had "accidentally" tripped her into Bruce the previous week. Her cheek had made contact with his forearm and she'd hulked out and chased Tony all over lower Manhattan before Wolverine had managed to talk her down. Bruce had seen her give Tony's arm a small tap; she'd probably absorbed his programming knowledge.
"Admit it, Banner." Clint's drawl snapped Bruce out of his musings. "You like her. Nat says you do and Nat's never wrong."
"Barton." Bruce said quietly. "I'd appreciate quiet because this experiment is highly volatile…like me."
Clint shut his mouth.
"Howdy Doc" JARVIS chimed in from the ceiling. Bruce sighed and took off his glasses.
"Yes JARVIS?" He said as he rubbed his eyes.
"Well, Thor'd be much obliged if ya'll let him in."
Bruce groaned and put the slide he was working on back in its container. "Let him in" he said as he went to put the container into the lab fridge. "It's not like I had work planned or anything."
"Thank ya kindly." JARVIS said. Clint snorted.
"Tony had better figure out a way to fix that, because if his AI calls me "suga" one more time…"
"It's probably Rogue's doing." Bruce suggested. "She has a crush on you and probably programmed it to be extra nice to you." The other members of the Avengers all knew Rogue was behind JARVIS's sudden appreciation for country music, and they had all agreed to not tell Tony; rather they sat back and enjoyed watching him stew.
Clint sneered and Bruce realized his mistake. "Oh really? And did you come upon this particular piece of information during a late night chat with a certain Ms. Munroe?"
Before he could respond the elevator doors opened and Thor strode into the lab.
"Dr. Banner, I require your assistance."
Bruce raised an eyebrow and Thor sighed. "Please." He added.
"What can I help you with?" Bruce had the feeling that he wasn't going to like whatever Thor was about to ask; he was right.
"I have heard that the lady Storm regards my powers as…petty tricks and that she often calls me cloud brain." Thor looked insulted. "You're close to her. Tell me; how might I destroy her…through practical jokes."
"I'm….not getting involved in the prank war." Bruce turned and attempted to shush the Hulk who was baring his teeth at Thor.
"You can't ask a guy to side against his girlfriend." Clint had produced a bag of gummy worms from one of the pockets in his cargo pants and began to chew obnoxiously. "Major party foul, dude."
"She's not my girlfriend." Bruce muttered.
"And if you ever want her to be you won't help him." Clint said.
"I'm confused, do Midgardians not place bros before hoes? Or has the lady Darcy been lying to me?"
Clint choked on a gummy worm. "You want a smashing don't you? You did not just call the woman Bruce has been making goo goo eyes over for the last month, a hoe. What if someone had said that about Dr. Foster?"
Thor stiffened then looked at the ground in shame. "I apologize, Doctor."
Bruce was busy quelling the rage of the Hulk who wanted revenge for Thor's insult of "Roro".
"SANCTUARY" Tony shouted as he burst into the lab.
"How the hell did you get in here?" Clint frowned. "The place is locked down."
"Whose name is on the lease?" Tony looked down. "Aaaaaw they burnt a hole in my lucky Black Sabbath shirt." The hole was the least of Tony's problems, a piece of one of his eyebrows was missing and there were bruises on his arms and his part of his pants had been frozen so they were stuck to his leg. "It's on now." he growled. "No one messes with the shirt."
"How old are you?" Clint asked.
"Can't take the heat, get out of the tower." Tony looked around the lab. "Now is there anything in here I can use to –"
Bobby and John burst into the lab.
"Prepare for trouble." Bobby held up a frozen hand.
John smirked and held up a fireball. "And make it double."
Bruce groaned. "Tony, you left the door open." The two X-men turned to look in horror at Bruce. Quickly their powers were shut off.
"Oh shit." John turned and rushed out of the lab.
"Sorry Dr. Banner…sir." Bobby said as he began backing towards the door. "We didn't mean to disturb you…we're sure you're very busy so…let's just pretend this never happened." Then he followed his friend out of the room.
"What did you do?" Tony looked at him with a mixture of confusion and admiration. Bruce averted his eyes. He was used to people fearing him, it wasn't a new reaction. But somehow it was more painful when the rejection came from people who also had powers.
Ororo frowned as Bobby and John returned to the institute.
"How was the tower?" The two boys' heads snapped in her direction and there was shared expression of guilt before they plastered false smiles on their faces.
"Great!" Bobby said. "The drone's gone."
"And the tower's still standing?" Ororo frowned, there was something the boys weren't telling her.
"Yes ma'am." John said, then they made a hasty exit. She sighed and went back into her room. Pulling up a video chat she called Bruce.
"Ororo." He gave her one of his shy smiles.
"Hello Bruce. Did you get any work done today?" She loved hearing about his experiments. She'd picked up a lot of scientific knowledge through living with Hank, and Bruce was always willing to explain whatever she didn't know.
"Um, no." Bruce blushed. "Clint and Thor invaded my lab followed by Tony and – " he hesitated.
"Let me guess. Bobby and John." Ororo sighed. "Did the boys give you any trouble?"
"No." Bruce's expression darkened, but he didn't elaborate.
"Good, because I warned them I'd be very upset if they interfered with your work." Ororo watched as a myriad of emotions washed over Bruce's face; surprise, confusion and appreciation. He was clearly no longer accustomed to having someone look out for him.
"I thought they were scared of me." he said finally, fiddling with his lab coat.
"Oh no." Ororo tried to give him a reassuring look. "I'm much more frightening then you are." To prove her point she caused thunder to rumble over manhattan. Bruce raised an eyebrow.
"You might want to be careful where you aim that thunder. Thor's on the warpath; apparently he doesn't appreciate being called cloudbrain."
"Jubilee must have told him." Ororo chuckled. "She practically worships him." she gave Bruce a smirk as he rolled his eyes.
"He's plotting payback."
"I'm more than capable of taking care of myself." Ororo frowned. Bruce held up his hands quickly.
"I know, just promise me I get front row seats when it happens." He tilted his head thoughtfully. "So, Rogue likes Clint, Jubilee likes Thor, any other Avengers crushes I should be aware of?"
"Kitty does have her eyes on a certain Captain." Ororo added.
"Well I guess I can understand that." Bruce leaned back in his chair. "Cap's a decent guy."
"And I hear there's a weather witch who might be interested in a charming green member of your team."
Bruce almost fell out his chair. It was the first time either of them had been direct about their growing attraction. Ororo knew he had his reservations because of his counterpart, so she decided she would make the first move.
"Ororo…I" he looked down. "Us is…we…it's too dangerous." he gave her a pleading look. "I don't want you hurt."
"Bruce."
"No." He sighed, running a hand through his messy hair. "I can't…if anything were to happen to you because of the other guy I'd never forgive myself."
"You said he had a positive reaction to me." Ororo insisted. Bruce had accidentally let slip this revelation about a week ago. Ororo had found the idea of the Hulk's affection endearing, though Bruce had been ashamed and refused to elaborate.
"This isn't just about him. It's about what people might do to you because of him. It may not look like it, but even though I'm an Avenger there are still people who are after me. Especially now that we know Hydra's out there, I can't…I'm not worth the risk to your safety." He gave a small shudder. "I…I need to go."
"Bruce wait – " but he'd already cut the conversation. All she was left with was a blank screen.
Bruce slammed the door to the hulk room as he stumbled around inside. Tony had built this place in order to let the other guy out. He hear the roaring in his head, but the anger he felt was directed at himself. Hulk was furious that "Stupid Banner" had run away from "Roro." Bruce quickly began trying to pull off his clothes in an effort to salvage them before the inevitable transformation began.
"She'll never care about us." He shouted as he crumbled to the floor; Hulk's skull splitting roars pounding in his eardrums. "Stop hoping for something that can never happen."
"BANNER NOT GIVE RORO CHANCE." The Hulk's presence was moving to the forefront of his consciousness.
"It's too dangerous." Bruce pleaded. "She could get hurt."
"BANNER STUPID."
"I can't take that risk." Bruce moaned as he twitched and shuddered on the floor, the pain of the transformation beginning. "Someone like her doesn't deserve a monster."
"RORO UNDERSTANDS." Hulk insisted.
Bruce shivered. The Hulk had a point; Ororo knew what it was like to have uncontrollable, destructive powers. "She does." He agreed. "Which is what is going to make it even more painful when she rejects us."
He collapsed to the ground as the Hulk took over fully and didn't wake until the next morning when Tony found him; a naked quivering mess in a room full of Hulk sized fist marks in the walls.