With his head down, he walked away from the school (or hell, as he often called it) and breathed a sigh of relief. Another day was over and he could finally go someplace where people would leave him alone! Not home, though. Anywhere but home.
For some completely strange reason, Ryder was kind of happy to go to the cliff again today to see Marley again. Yesterday, she had seemed to sweet and Ryder had enjoyed her company, if not wanted more of it. Yeah, he wanted to sit there with her for the rest of the night with someone who actually cared about him and respected him enough not to insult him or hit him.
He had kept the cake from yesterday – he carried it with him all throughout the next day at school and stored it in his locker where it was now. He was just hoping that the football players wouldn't open his locker and steal.
Ryder found it so strange that this cake meant so much to him, but it was the only nice thing anyone had ever done for him. And he found it strange how he was slowly beginning to trust Marley. He didn't know what it felt like to be… liked.
"Oi! Ryder!" As he walked, he heard his name being called behind him. He spun around slowly, grabbing onto his bag tighter and was faced with four large jocks in their varsity jackets, striding towards him. He immediately cursed himself for responding to his own name.
"Hey, fag!" The tall blonde football player shouted as they got closer to Ryder. He pushed Ryder to the side and he stumbled over, running into the larger, bulkier jock.
"Loser!" They all shouted at different times. Ryder shook his head and sighed, turning around to go away from them. He couldn't stand this anymore.
But at his spun around, the two jocks behind him sent the two cups in their hands flying towards his face, coating him in deep red ice. Ryder gasped and wiped his eyes, cursing under this breath. The boys around him laugher before he felt two more cups being poured on his head, coating his clothes and getting into his eyes.
"Gaybo!" He heard another one of them shout before they shoved him to the side onto the small grass hill next to the path. Ryder brought his sore legs up and curled up into a ball on the grass, coated in slushie and now grass, letting a tear escape his eye. He was so sick of everything.
This whole world is mad, he thought to himself. I just want to feel the way that everyone else feels, happy with their lives. I don't know to be looked through… I just want to be noticed and cared for, for fucks sake.
He quickly sat up, the food colouring from the slushie stinging the cuts on his back. He winced and closed his eyes tightly, hoping to get rid of the pain. It didn't go away, though. His whole body ached and shivered.
Instead of sitting and cursing his life, he stood up and ran towards his safe place. The run was long and tiring, and the more he ran, the more the cuts on his back and stomach ached. It stung so badly – he wanted to curl up into a ball and die from the pain. Times like these, he felt like he had to die. And times like these were all of the time.
As Ryder reached the nearby rocks leading up to the cliff, he felt tears rolling down his red stained face. He leaned against the sharp rocks and let out a loud sob, falling to his knees and resting his head against the sharp corner of the rock, cutting his head on it. He broke down into more sobs, curling up against the rocks and shaking.
He was just so sick of life – when would things get better for him? Probably never, he thought bitterly. He reached up to wipe his face with his jumper sleeve and quickly pulled it back as his arm began to sting.
It hurt so badly, Ryder didn't think he could go on… he always thought that, everyday of his life. But some strange feeling willed him to live on – and today, it was the thought of seeing Marley. He wasn't even sure why he wanted to see her, he just kind of did.
Slowly and carefully, Ryder pulled himself to his feet and lifted his leg to climb the rock. He let out a whine of pain and crawled along the ground of the hill, finally being able to see the sun. He sighed and crawled forward just a little bit more, collapsing as soon as he could see the sun glaring down on him.
The sky was slightly orange, with a tinge of pink and yellow seeping through the clouds. He closed his eyes and buried his head in the grass, sighing deeply. His whole body shook with fear and pain and he couldn't seem to move anymore.
After five long, painful minutes, he pulled himself into the sitting position, crossing his legs and sighing heavily, wiping his red hands against his stained jeans. He didn't even bother to think about how stained his shirt was and how much trouble he was going to get into. He just cried.
"Ryder?" Ryder didn't even turn his head when he heard Marley's voice. He just let out a strangled sob and ducked his head. He couldn't even look at Marley – the slushie on his face was embarrassing and she was bound to ask questions. "Hey, Ryder."
Marley fell down next to Ryder and watched him carefully, tugging on the sleeves of her jacket nervously. She had been wondering all day if Ryder wanted her here – she was worried he wouldn't and that she'd have to leave. She loved sitting here with him, even if they didn't say a word to each other.
But as she stared at him, she noticed his head hanging and his greasy hair in front of his brown eyes and how his whole body was coated in melted, red ice. She frowned and shuffled closer to him, her knee touching his. Ryder didn't move away from her, he just sat there, staring at the ground. "Ryder?" Marley whispered, running her finger up Ryder's cold and wet arm. The clothes he was wearing were so thin and the ice had obviously gone through it… and being almost winter, he must have been freezing. Ryder flinched at her touch but didn't move, only shaking when he sobbed.
"What happened?" Marley whispered, stretching her hand to grab Ryder's. He pulled his hand away from her, though, looking away from her as well. "Ryder, seriously, what happened?" Marley's tone grew louder and stronger.
"Nothing." He snapped, staring down at the ground away. He pulled at the thin sleeves of his jumper to try and make himself warmer. He gazed up at the sun and tried to focus on how beautiful it was, but he felt so shitty.
"No, something's wrong." Marley whispered, digging her nails into her hands to stop herself from giving Ryder comfort by patting his back or leg or something.
"Everything's always wrong." He muttered, turning slightly to face Marley. Marley looked his face up and down worriedly and stared at the red food colouring covering his entire face and his sad eyes, so distant.
"What happened?" Marley reached forward and cupped one side of Ryder's face in her hand, wiping at his wet cheek lightly. He didn't push her hand away, but he just sat there, staring straight at her. "Ryder," Marley sighed, shaking her head and licking her thumb, wiping her fingers across Ryder's face again.
Ryder sighed and averted his gaze from Marley's eyes, staring down at her legs, trying to stop himself from swatting her hand away. He was so concerned about het touching him, yet her touch was so warm on his cold skin and he weirdly liked it. Marley was breaking down his walls and Ryder didn't know if he liked it or not.
"Nothing, Marley." Marley was shocked – that was the first time he had used her name. It kind of felt like being told you were someone's best friend, except she was on a lower level. Ryder didn't think she was a friend but she was there… and maybe Ryder would trust her enough one day to call her his best friend.
Marley sighed and continued wiping at his face lightly, trying to get rid of the ice on his face. She felt so bad for him and she desperately wanted to know what had happened. Why were people being so horrible to him?
Ryder didn't move as Marley tried to rub off the ice from his skin, he just sat in front of her, watching her blue eyes scan over his face and a sad expression flicker across her face from her worried one. Ryder didn't know it, but she cared. To think someone cared was a strange thought for Ryder.
"Are you ever going to tell me what happened, Ryder?" Marley whispered, taking her hand away and facing the sun, watching it slowly go down. Ryder faced the sun, too, pulling at his damp sleeves and wiping his face which was half dry.
"One day, Marley. One day." He whispered. And maybe it was true; maybe one day he would grow so close to Marley that he could tell her everything… but that day would most likely never come. Marley would get bored of him and eventually stop caring. That's how he knew it was going to happen.
Marley nodded at Ryder and watched him as he gazed at the sun. He'd stopped crying, but his eyes were still watery and bloodshot.
She wanted to know who made him this sad – she needed to know who was hurting him because she hated to see him in so much pain. Marley needed to know why Ryder was hurting so badly.
Marley reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone, staring at Ryder from the corner of her eye to make sure he wasn't watching her – luckily, he was too into his own thoughts to notice her typing out a message.
To Kitty: Meet me at my house tomorrow morning – we're skipping homeroom.
She took another glance at Ryder's bruised and battered face before clicking send. Things were messed up in Ryder's life, and she would go to any lengths to make him feel better again. That was Marley Rose's nature after all.
{x}
Thank you all again for the reviews and everything again! I feel so, so happy when I wake up in the morning or come home from school and see them there!
So… this chapter might not be my best, I'm not sure; firstly, I was distracted by X Factor (in which my favourite act went home) and then Glee was on and there was a Ryley kiss and you know, I cried… but it was so beautiful… #camryntalksaboutheruselesslife
airzy7 ~ I'm glad you liked the last chapter, and hopefully you liked this one, too! I'm also glad you liked that she made the cake! Also your review actually gave me more ideas (with the Karley friendship part and all), so thank you! There will most definitely not be one thousand chapters; that'd be horrible to write and read. I'm going to have like 30-something chapters that go over the time span of 30-something days so I'm staying as far away from one thousand chapters as I can haha. I just called it 'One Thousand Sundowns' because I got obsessed with the song 1,000 Sundowns by Emma Louise (because of the Offspring finale) and I based this fanfiction off of that song so… And I saw you favourited it! Thank you so much for that – it totally made me feel so awesome! Thanks again for reviewing as well! Xx Sorry this is so long, too.
Jennoist-OTP ~ I'm so happy you found it cute, haha. Marley will make Ryder feel better, over time, of course. I'm still not sure how yet haha, but somehow... aw, thank you, too! I really hope you liked this chapter! And… did you see that new video that Melissa posted this morning? I'm not sure what time it would have been there but… wasn't it adorable? Ah, Blake is the most adorable little shit ever. Sorry, haha. Xx
Thanks for reading! And please leave your thoughts on this chapter, or anything I could work on!
-Camryn x