To everybody who has read/reviewed/favorited/followed this story-I love you all and I'm really sorry that it took me so long to update! I am super busy and usually just crash when I get a chance to relax. This chapter was written in two pieces, so if there are any discontinuities, please let me know. I hope that it is still somewhat amusing, and I think that the next chapter should be better. I'm still planning out ideas.

Warnings-Slight cursing, mentions of sexual situations, general abuse of the word awesome.

Disclaimer-Don't own Hetalia. Etc.

Enjoy!

Elizabeta sat down for her afternoon video time the next day trying not to get her hopes up.

He said he'd be back, but it's Prussia, for goodness sakes. No one knows what he'll do.

To keep her mind off her annoying expectations, Hungary loaded up a new video from her leftover cameras in her Roderich's house. It seemed that her prissy aristocratic ex-husband and his new trigger-happy boyfriend were getting along very well. Even if Prussia had ever had a thing for Austria, he would have to get over it now.

Elizabeta reflected that the thought of Roderich rejecting Gilbert should not make her this vindictively happy.

As Elizabeta berated herself for letting thoughts of the albino interrupt her video watching, the Prussian himself interrupted her actual video feed. The live feed, from her bedroom. Of course.

"Afternoon Lizzy."

What, I'm not Eli today?

"I've challenged myself to think of a new nickname for you every day too. And Lizzy seems like a pretty obvious one. Better than Lizab or Abet or Izab anyway. Bet you've never been called those before."

The newly-nicknamed Lizzy laughed at Gilbert's ridiculous suggestions, although if he ever actually dared to call her Izab, she would kick his albino ass.

"Anyway, I just realized that I might not have your full attention yet. So I brought a little something to show you." He glanced furtively at her closet door, which shook slightly as if something or someone was banging against it. The door shook again, barely. Someone weak.

Elizabeta took in the scene for a second before coming to an unwelcome conclusion about what was in her closet: Roderich.

Just as she thought the name, Gilbert chimed in.

"Roderich." He grinned but refused to elaborate for a moment.

Elizabeta's mind whirled.

Gilbert, you idiot! His boyfriend just happens to own a lot of big guns and is not at all afraid to use them, especially where Roddy or Lili is concerned. For his lover and his sister, Vash would not hesitate to shoot anything, or anyone. Like a particular grinning Prussian. And why was he bringing Roderich into this? He was already invading her thoughts about Prussia, so couldn't he stay out of their actual conversations? Wait-focus Eli. An angry Swiss man is probably about to pop a cap in Prussia's ass and I don't know what to do about it. Well, granted, Gilbert deserves it. But as stupid as he is, I don't want him to die! I went through enough worry when his country was dissolved.

The memory of the angst and worry she had gone through when Prussia had been dissolved snapped Hungary back to reality. Prussia had survived (thank goodness). And he was talking. Don't worry Eli, you're not going to lose him again.

"What do you think I should do with our dear stuffy aristocrat? I could hold him for ransom, or dress him up for some sexy pictures-for Vash, of course-or I could provide some quality film for your collection." Gilbert's face was shamelessly lecherous.

If you do anything with Roderich, I. Will. Castrate. You.

The strength of her reaction surprised Elizabeta as she prepared to go save the Austrian from rape and the Prussian from murder.

"Lizzy?"

Hungary looked back at the screen in the midst of picking up her pan. She glanced at the Gilbert's screen, then caught a slight movement in her peripheral vision. On one of her other live feeds-one of the ones in Austria's house-Vash was raptly listening as Roderich played a dramatic classical piece.

Damn it Prussia!

Elizabeta literally growled. Gilbert was going to have hell to pay for tricking her like that.

"I actually don't have Roddy with me."

No shit, Sherlock.

" I mean, I like my body without any bullet wounds."

So do I, but at the moment, you're asking for a frying pan shaped indentation.

"So, sorry to disappoint, but no yaoi action from me."

Ha. He had predicted her emotions wrong for once. She was not, and would never be disappointed at the lack of Gilbert/Roderich yaoi. The idea was just wrong. So no, she was not disappointed. Pissed off. Enraged. (And maybe a little relived). But not disappointed.

"The only way I could do yaoi is if there were two of me. And if they would do each other. Which I totally would, because I'm just that awesome."

Um, gross. Elizabeta stifled a laugh.

"But sadly, there is only one of me, because if there were more, I doubt the world would be able to contain our awesomeness."

Elizabeta idly wondered how many times Gilbert would use his favorite word today.

"But I forgot. I came here to talk to you, and I decided that I wanted to clear something up. It's about Glasses."

I do not want to talk about this right now. Or ever.

"I know that you think that I had a thing for him once, as you chased me off the premises every time I set food in the house you too shared, but you let me hang out in your bedroom when the house is yours alone. I also know that you don't like the idea, due to the conspicuous lack of yaoi involving an Austrian and a Prussian by Fryingpaine52. You've written about literally every other nation, even Sealand and Latvia. By the way, Lizzy, that's sick. And that means something coming from me."

You're sick. Hungary mentally retorted. And there is some obvious preslash between the two!

"Because you have never written about me getting down and dirty with another male country, I assume that you have some reason to dislike the idea of me with a man. Or at the very least, with Austria. So let me ease your mind."

If this is my confession of the day, it better be a good one. Elizabeta maintained her skepticism, but was barely able to hide her eagerness to hear what Prussia was planning on saying.

"I have never had a crush on Roderich."

Elizabeta felt like a weight had been lifted off her chest and sighed in relief. Wait, what? Why am I relieved?

"Nor have I been attracted to Matthew, Francis, Antonio, Kiku, Feli, Lovi, Alfred, Arthur, Vash, or any other nation."

Hungary felt a strange mix of feelings at this. So he's never been attracted to a nation. That included her. Well, she knew that their friendship was purely platonic, despite his surprisingly attractive looks for an albino and her beauty for a girl who used to act like a boy.

"Well, any male nation anyway."

With that parting statement, Gilbert winked, jumped out the window and swaggered away.

Elizabeta was left staring.

When Gilbert logged onto NosebleedFiction that night, his previous statement about the "feistyness" of Hungarians was only proven by the current status on Fryingpaine52's profile.

Prussians are annoying bastards.

Gilbert only smiled. He had long since learned to pick out which curses of Eli's were really terms of endearment. Bastard was number one on the list.