Ch.3 Thoughts and Dreams

Kaylee's POV

For some strange reason I couldn't get Jared out of my mind. From the way he smiled to how incredibly good looking he was. I just could not for the life of me get him of my mind. Not that I thought it was a bad thing, but I felt silly because there was no way someone like him would ever like a girl like me. Ugh I cannot allow myself to want someone to like me.

I knew the real reason that we moved here. The reason no one would say. But I knew. We moved to this place for "vacation" because my parents wanted a few things to happen. One, they wanted me to say goodbye while I was still here. Which makes since because people were crying like they were never going to see me again, the truth is they probably won't. Also, they wanted me to not have to worry about keeping a fake smile on my face.

And lastly the worst one in my book was that my time of acting normal was gone. I had been sick loads of times like any other kid but I had only a few incidents due to my illness. That wouldn't last though. According to Dr. Cullen he said that within the next few months everything would start to change. He said that it could take longer or it could happen any day, but that it would happen and soon, and to prepare ourselves for that.

I sighed and put down my book. I wanted to stay awake to see our repair man again, but all this thinking about the past and pain and other things was about to make me cry. I had no want for any cute guy to walk into my room and see me about to cry or worse in the act of crying. So I put my book on the floor slipped underneath my covers and the moment my head hit my pillow I was out like a light.

I was just sitting on my bed like any other night, except I wasn't home anymore. I was in a sense, as in I was in La Push all by myself, no friends around just me on my bed.

I had this really weird feeling that kept creeping up on me. I couldn't tell what was causing it but I knew it wasn't good. I had a vague feeling that I have felt this before. I bolted straight up from my bed and I ran into the bathroom. I pulled up my too big Green Day t-shirt and I saw what I had been secretly afraid of my whole life.

Right there on my abdomen was black and blue and purple almost bruise like marks. They started at where my kidney would be located and went all the way up to the right side of my neck. To say that I looked like an alien would not be understating it a bit.

I went to touch it than deeply regretted it because all of a sudden the skin started to turn to dust. I started to turn to dust. I was nothing anymore just a pile of dust on the floor of my bathroom.

My mind was jumbled up I thought I had just turned to some weird sort of ash, but now here I was standing at my own funeral? Yea my own funeral… I was a tad bit spooked. I walked up and down the aisle to see who I recognized. I was shocked at how many people actually showed up. There were my two closest friends, Melina and Sammy. They were holding each other and pure sobbing. They each were still wearing the friendship bracelets we had made when I told them about my sickness.

I continued walking down the aisle. I once again froze when I saw Paul in the second to front row. He had a look of complete sadness on his face. Then right in front of him was Jared. I was taken aback for a minute because if Paul looked sad Jared looked like his will to live was taken away from him. It seemed to me that the breathtaking light that I had seen in his eyes had vanished, and was replaced with and endless pit of grief.

I wasn't sure how long I stood there staring at Jared and every now and then glancing to take a look at Paul, but it most have been awhile. I think I would have spent the whole time watching them two but just then I heard my dad, "I'm glad she has finally left us." I turned as a jolt of shock was sent into me. My own dad was happy I was gone. I felt my eyes start to get teary and I wanted to run away from there but by the pure sorrow that was written on my mother and fathers face had me frozen in place.

"Oh hunny, I know. I am glad she is finally in a better less painful place too." My mother's voice was filled with unshed tears.

"Mom its fine I am right here. You don't have to be sad, I can still see you. Mom?" My mom couldn't hear me. I figured I might be a ghost but I still needed her to know that she was right and that I wasn't hurting anymore and that everything was fine. "Mom! I'm right here, Mom!" I kept trying to reach out for her but I could not feel her. My hands kept going right through her like I wasn't real.

I turned then, when I heard several gasp within a sea full of mourning people. I saw my body. I looked peaceful if anything. But I also looked young. So the end came soon, I couldn't not have been older than sixteen, so I died before my next birthday good to know.

I walked closer so I could see what they had dared to put me in. I grimaced when I saw that I was dressed based on what my mother had always wished I would have worn. It was a dress cut just below the knees. I am neither a tom boy nor a girly girl. I like dresses and jeans. So her putting me in a dress was not what I was at all mad about.

The dress had GIANT PINK FLOWERS all over it. I could picture me right now waking up from my "death" and going to a summer bbq with my boyfriend Ken. I mean I am no Barbie. I waved off the way I was dressed and the matching white high heel sandals she had put me in.

I was in the process of just taken everything about my dead body in when some strange man who I assumed worked for the funeral home…that was weird to say…Closed my lid.

Everything went blank. My world was no black. I knew I was dead but I could see things before. It was as if the moment they had closed my casket they had condemn me to actually being dead.

"No! I'm not ready yet! NOO!" My eye jolted open, my breath was coming in short ragged breathes and I was shaking. I'm fine it was just a dream. Well I nightmare but I'm fine.

I heard my dad coming down the hall. "Sweetie, what's wrong? You have been screaming for the past few minutes. Did you have nightmare?"

I simply shook my head. "I was dead daddy." I hardly ever called my dad, daddy but that nightmare had seemed so real. I was dead…

The look of horror passed over my dad and he wrapped me up in the tightest hug he could have managed. He began to coo things to me like I was a toddler but I didn't mind I needed to hear it to feel like I was alive. I don't really know when I started to cry but I did. My dad just did what all dads would do and he held me and let me get his night shirt all full of salt water and snot. What are dads for right?

After what seemed like forever he pushed me slightly away enough to get a good look at me. He held onto my shoulders and let out a tired sigh, "Are you alright now?"

"Yea it was a really bad dream-uh I mean nightmare."

"Do you want to talk about it Kays?" his eyes were so filled with concern that I didn't want to make him worry any more than he already was.

"No I'm fine. Just the boogie man. Thanks you though. I love you dad." He said his "I love you too kiddo" and then we said goodnight and my dad left with a parting kiss on the forehead.

I laid back down feeling a little better now, that my dad had once again come to my aid, and I turned onto my side looked at my clock it said 3:23 I cursed my evil mind for making me wake up this early. I flopped onto my other side and tried to fall back to sleep this time hopefully without dreams.

Jared's POV

I was running the borders again tonight while Sam was spending the night with Emily. I was jealous that he was sleeping right now when I was out in the middle of the night running my ass off. I would be more pissed if I could feel the cold but nothing felt cold to me not anymore.

I once again thought of Kaylee. I was lucky that Sam wasn't phased when I was tonight because I was sure that he would have been on my back about thinking about her. He told me not to snoop but I couldn't help it. I didn't mean to but once I took one look at Kaylee's bright green eyes, I had to know everything about her. I hated it. Because I knew what it meant.

I had done the one thing I did not want to do. I had imprinted.

My mind kept throwing mental pictures of her at me. I knew she was beautiful. I didn't think anyone could ever be better looking than her but that doesn't mean I want some freaky scifi bullshit making me like her. I just wanted to know if it was me who wanted her so bad or the wolf… That is the part that was killing me. That and how amazing she was.

There was something she was hiding from the rest of the world. Well at least hiding from the people here in La Push. I could tell her parents were hiding it too. I wanted her to trust me with it. You barely know the girl, she will never trust you. Man I hated my thoughts sometimes.

I knew Sam was going to start his patrol in a few hours so I knew I needed to get my thoughts under control. Because he was going to ask me how it went. And to be honest it went just fine other than the fact that I thought I smelt a vampire. It was a smell that I knew Sam had smelt before. So maybe it was one of the golden eyed ones. But I didn't know. I told myself that was the reason I kept circling back around the Pond house just to make sure they were safe. But in all honesty I think I was doing it because from where I was running I could hear her breathing and if I stopped and looked into her window while still hidden in the woods my overly good eyesight let me see and I guess you could say watch her sleep.

I remember that I was disappointed by the she fell asleep before I could say goodnight to her, and I also remember how bad of a creep I had been. I had literally walked into her room and since I could see in the dark I saw how she was sleeping and did I get out a flash light and finish my work. No I stood there with the shut door directly behind me and did what I was currently doing right now. I watched her sleep.

I don't know why I find her so mesmerizing but I do. I knew I had a fairly good reason to be watching her now even if I didn't have a good one then.

I was standing outside her window as a giant light brown wolf because about an hour ago she had woke up screaming about how she wasn't ready to die. I have had enough nightmares to know that hers had been a rough one.

I remember a whine escaping from me when I saw her start uncontrollably crying while her dad held her. I hated the way I wanted to phase back into me and run to her and hold her and how I was jealous of her dad because I wanted to be the one to tell her it was alright and the one to kiss her goodnight. I hated how I felt that way. How dare this one little girl make me feel this way. If I want to love and care for someone else than this bond Kaylee and me share cannot and will not stop me.

Deep down though I knew that if she ever found out about it that maybe just maybe she could change that. That simple thought had me making the pact before I even realized what I was doing.

I told myself, or more like promised myself that I would not make any more contact with this girl. She would go one with her vacation and I would go on with my life.

Sam's words flashed into my mind, "It will be painful being away from her. It hurts you won't be able to do it".

Yea well we will see about that. Maybe I was being stubborn because I knew how bad I already was missing her. I could also feel this sense of need and want to always be by her side to love and protect her…

I was not going to have that. I would fight it I had to fight it. I knew that eventually she would go home to California, which her parents told me they lived at before coming her. I knew she would leave and I would be shattered. I also knew that there were dangers of her being with me. They were all too clear with what happened with Sam and Emily.

Pictures of Emily's scarred and damaged face enter my mind. I winced and shied away from them. I might not want to be imprinted but I knew that the want to never hurt Kaylee in anyway was stronger.

I sighed and did the wolf version of shaking my head and continued running the border. I was trying so hard not to think of Kaylee but I couldn't. Everything from how you could only tell how she was truly feeling when you looked into her eyes. All the way to things like how kissable her lips were. Ugh Jesus Jared turning into a sap all over one girl.

I had to admit it I could think of worse girls to imprint on. I was vaguely happy that it was someone like her. She had dimensions to her, like if I broke down one wall and uncovered that small secret there were just a hundred other walls to take its place. Some people wouldn't want to take the time to break down all those walls but I wanted to.

But I promised myself I wouldn't. I was thankful for once that Sam was present because that meant I had to stop thinking about Kaylee. This would hopefully keep me somewhat sane.

How was the Pond's?

I needed to word this correctly or he would know that I imprinted. It was fine. Nice family. Hey have you smelt this before? I let my mind fill with the scent of the bloodsucker.

Yes that was one of the Cullen's. The doctor's scent I am sure of it. I sighed in relief.

But what was he doing here on our land? Does this mean he broke the treaty? I had so many questions running through my mind. If Sam and I attacked we would not win. Seven against two was hardly a fair fight.

Don't get carried away Jared. Dr. Carlisle has asked special permission to cross into our land. We would have said no but he talked to old Quil and he agreed that it was what needed to be done. But he assured me that it would only be him until further notice.

I was even more confused now. What business does he have here? And what do you mean further notice?

I could see that even Sam did not know everything but he did willingly tell me what he did know, "Old Quil only said that he had a patient here and that if the condition gets worse he might need to bring someone else with him. No more than two at a time and none of them can come without him being with them."

I shuddered at the thought of the bloodsuckers being on our land and being that close to our people. Sam who is he treating?

I couldn't tell if Sam knew or not. But either way he made no move to share that information with me.

Your sift is over Jared go home and get some rest. You will start again at two, meet me at Emily's before you start.

Yes master, I will do you bidding master. I couldn't help but laugh as I phased back, before I did though I could tell that Sam was rolling his eyes.

Oh and Jared, when you get to Emily's we are going to talk about Kaylee.

With that statement I phased back and pulled on my cutoffs and ran home. How did he know?

Hey I hope you guys liked this chapter.

Next will be the bonfire scene, it is going to be intense I promise you

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