Chapter Two – Nightmares
I leave tomorrow, my case is packed, by the door, ready to be placed in the car tomorrow, I have clothes left out to wear tomorrow, while I would be happy to wear tracksuit bottoms and a baggy t-shirt, Mother insists that I wear an uncomfortable smart black skirt and a white blouse, so that instead of looking like an eleven year old school girl I look like a thirty year old woman about to go to a job interview. My hair will be brushed into a smart bun, to carry on with the job interview look; I will wear flat black shoes and natural coloured tights. I will be transformed, no longer will I be Lily, instead I will be Lillian Evans, how could I refuse?
The evening disappeared so quickly, the hours slipped away, the minutes floated by, I tried to hold on, for this was going to be my last evening with my family, because tomorrow things would change, everything would change. Then time stopped, and slowed down, the hours dragged on, the minutes ticked by. We all sat in the living room, glancing at the clock every couple of seconds. Excitement and nervousness nibbled away at me, small bites at first, quickly becoming larger and more painful. Eventually I couldn't take any more, consumed by excitement I sloped of to bed, hugging my parent's goodnight and walking with Petunia to our rooms. I paused in the corridor, the door to my room beckoning me. 'Petunia,' I whispered, tears pricking at my eyes. Obligingly she turned to face me; her blue eyes were rapidly filling with tears. 'I'm going to miss you, who's going to look after me when I end up in trouble?' I asked remembering the countless occasions she had rescued me from teachers, when I had been in trouble.
'I'll miss you too Brat.' I hugged her tightly, this would be the last time I saw her until Christmas, Father had decided that only he would take me to the station to get the Hogwarts express. I sloped into my room; I wasn't surprised to see Tom sitting on my bed, a long thin wand being spun in his fingers casually, he had been coming every night, talking to me, showing me magic. I smiled at him, before joining him on the bed.
'Lily, are you ready for tomorrow, big day?' I nodded, still unsure whether I want to go.
'Yeah, I suppose,' I lied; I got of the bed and walked away from him. 'Tom,' I turned to face him, my heart beating fast, tears filling my eyes. 'You will still come and see me when I'm at Hogwarts' He smiled at me, that deep and meaningful smile I have seen so many times since he has come to me.
The rest of the night passed in a blur of excitement, Tom taught me some more magic, though I was unable to perfect it and then he told me it was time to go to bed. As I lay on the soft mattress and sunk into my soft quilts, I realised how tired I had become over the last couple of days, having stayed up late to talk to Tom. That night I had a strange dream; I was in a graveyard, surrounded by people in black cloaks, in the middle were two people, one an old man, with a snake like face, and dangerous red eyes, pointing a wand at a boy who was hiding from him, clutching an arm, covered n blood. I woke screaming as the man and boy both screamed different things at the same time and two beads of light met.
I lay on my bed, tears rolling down my face, my breath short and sharp, Mother came in, wearing her white nightdress and sat on the end of my bed, I told her about my dream as my tears slowly ceased to flow. By the time I had calmed down sunlight was pouring into my room, though the netted curtain. My father knocked on my door, a sign that I had to get up and get dressed. Sluggishly I pulled myself from my bed and began to get dressed, ripping my tights as I attempted to pull them over my shoes. Looking in the mirror I could see that my face was drawn and very pale while there were large bags under my eyes. I stood gazing at my reflection, mesmerised by how dreadful I looked. I only left my room, with a sad farewell look, when my father shouted up to me, saying that if we didn't leave in the net couple of minutes we would be late.
I ran down to where my parents were waiting in the kitchen, my Mother sipping from her coffee mug. 'Lily, you look dreadful.' I tried to smirk at her and come out with a sarcastic comment but I didn't have enough energy and just collapsed into a chair, gratefully accepting a cup of tea offered to me. I only managed to gulp down half of it, scolding my throat before my parents bustled me into the car. The trip to Kings cross was uneventful; I stared out of the window thinking about what was going to happen when we got to the station. I jumped as my father placed a hand on my shoulder and told me that we had arrived. I slowly climbed out of the car, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror I was shocked to see how pale I was, and with my red hair sticking to my face I looked even worse. Pulling my black jacket tighter around my body I walked towards platforms 9 and 10, Father carrying my case, telling me I looked too weak. I didn't try to argue, I didn't have the strength. I paused in front of the barrier separating the two platforms and turned to Father, who had also stopped. He turned to face me and for the first time I could see how tired he looked, his face almost as pale as mine, and his hair line receding rapidly.
'Lily, my special Lily,' He whispered as he held me tightly in his arms. I suddenly felt like a little girl again, remembering all the times he had hugged me tightly, protectively as though he knew something and wasn't telling me.
'Father, are you okay, you look tired.' He gave a weak smile before looking, his eyes laughing.
'Be a good girl, and remember bring back some frogspawn at Christmas. That is the sort of stuff you'll have to use in all these spells you'll be doing?' I tired to smile, but the corners of my lips refused to move.
'You didn't answer my question Father.' I said flatly, tears flooding my eyes and pouring down my cheeks. 'Are you okay father?' The laughter sunk from his face, his tired eyes looked even more tired, his face looked drawn and lacked any colour and his body looked to be in pain, struggling against his light weight.
'No Lily, I'm not alright. I'm tired and have been for a long time. Listen to me.' He grabbed my arm roughly, as though he was in a hurry before speaking in rushed, hurried tone. 'Listen to me. Don't worry about me; I'll be fine, worry about yourself. Promise that no matter what happens you will stay true to yourself; don't be pressured into doing anything, by anyone. Enjoy yourself. Be yourself. Live.' My face had become stained by the tears that refused to stop rolling, I didn't want to live Father, but he dragged me to the barrier and shoved me through, shouting goodbye. I tried to turn around and face him but he had gone, instead I was facing Tom. Relief flooded through my body before I was washed away with a crowd of students all heading to the scarlet steam engine.
Slowly, trying to fight the crowd I climbed onto the Hogwarts express, negligently pulling my case behind me. I wandered down the train peering into compartments to see if they were empty, I was triumphant with the last one. I entered, slumped into the seat and fell into a restless sleep. I found myself in the graveyard again; this time though the boy was surrounded by a group of shadowy people, I couldn't help but be drawn to a woman and a man who were directly behind the boy. The man was an exact replica of the boy, with messy black hair and round black glasses, while the woman looked like my own Mother, but had my father's eyes. I gasped, shocked by what I saw, and with a thump I woke from my dream. My heart was pounding fast, while sweat poured down my face, making me shiver uncontrollably.
I didn't go back to sleep for the rest of the journey, I didn't dare, in case I ended up in the graveyard again. No body came in to the compartment, I didn't see anyone, I didn't speak to anyone, until the train stopped. Not sure what to do I climbed of the train and stood, dwarfed by the crowd of students streaming of the train. I saw a tall man, head and shoulders above the students, calling out loudly, drawing a small group towards him, I made my way towards him, as I neared I heard what he was shouting.
'Firs' years, firs' years over here.' As the last student drifted away, the man lead us to the edge of a large lake, the water black, where there were rows of little, wooden boats. 'No more than four to a boa'' I climbed into one occupied by two girls. One had long mahogany hair, pulled into an elegant plait, while the other girl had black hair, streaked with bright pink. They both smiled at me and we waited for the boats to start moving towards the large, magnificent castle that was on the other side of the lake. As the boats pulled away, two boys still standing on the bank, talking in hushed voices, scanned the boats, paused on the one I was in and the first, ran, jumped and landed with a big thud in it. The back of the boat bounced roughly on the water and sprayed me and the other girl with freezing water. The second boy landed with another thud in the boat, sending it off track and banging into another boat.
'Qui' messin' around you four,' the large man called, crammed into one boat on his own, 'Five, hang on a momen' tha' ain' righ' just stay still and no messin' about,' I glared at the first boy, he had black hair and grey eyes that followed every move I made, I hadn't even looked at the other boy yet. When I did my body tensed, my mouth dropped and I tried to back away from him, which resulted in me falling into the lake. Normally my first reaction would have been to have started swimming frantically, trying to get the surface. However the cold water numbed my body, and the further down I went the less I felt, the weaker I became, the less I cared about reaching the surface. The last of my energy seeped away.
I gasped; cold air filled my lungs, my eyes opened. I was in the lake and the second boys arm was wrapped around my neck, supporting my head, keeping it above water. I tried to push away from him, I had to get away from him, but his arm was strong and held me fast, until the tall man came and scooped me out of the water and into his already crammed boat. He placed his thick, warm moleskin coat around me, as the boats started to move of again. The other boy had climbed back into his boat, and was being wrapped in any spare clothes the girls and the other boy had. 'You alrigh'?' the man asked, I nodded, too weak to answer, glad that we were near to the castle, which looked inviting and warm. Glad that I may finally get a goodnight's sleep, something I hadn't had since I had found out I was a witch, since I had met Tom.