"Adventure Time!
Come on, bust some rhymes,
We'll go to very jacked up times.
Finn! Betty! And Simon too!
Let's save all space-time!
Adventure Time!
Chapter Two: Urgent Business
Urgence Evergreen's Time…
It was a time of magic and dinosaurs. Millions of years into the past, the land shaped by the Elementals themselves. Fire, Ice, Candy, and Slime were the prominent features of the landscape, along with jungle desert and dinosaurs. This is the first of times our group of heroes arrive to stop Schrodinger. They arrive midair…screaming…
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Finn and Simon having arrived several hundred feet in the air with Betty, who is surprisingly calm about this. She revealed why when she pulled out some rope and a massive table cloth and made a parachute big enough for the group and wrapped it around them. This caused their freefall to turn into a gentle descent into the jungle below. Landing safely, the group looked over themselves to see if anything was missing than Betty coughed and began to speak.
"Always good to prepare for any situation. Now let's get moving!" stated Betty before moving in an unknown direction.
"WHOA! WHOA! WHOA! Firstly of all, where…or should I say when are we?" exclaimed Finn, still coming down from the adrenaline rush of the freefall.
Betty sighed before she answered Finn's question, "I don't know the exact date, but I know it's the time of the First Elementals. This is long before humans started existing! There is only a few legends and very little physical evidence of this period. The most intact artifact from this time period is…"
"The Crown…" Simon finished explaining, "I remember having a dream, or maybe a memory, of this time when I was the Ice King, before the Catalyst Comet came to OOO. Unfortunately, most of the details are fuzzy…"
"Okay, good to know. Second question: why should we follow you?!" asked Finn in a scathing tone while pointing at Betty.
"Look I know I made some mistakes but-" began Betty before being interrupted.
"MISTAKES?! How about help the psycho were chasing mess with time?! How about attacking Wizard City and killing 'who-knows-how-many' of its citizens to do it?! Oh, and how about Betty-traying me after I went to all the trouble of collecting the crown jewels, and leaving me to get brainwashed?!" exclaimed Finn finally letting all the frustration he had with Betty in one go.
Betty, however, did not seem impressed by Finn's list of complaints. "You're still mad about that?! Sorry, but I think we have more important things to worry about right now-" said Betty before she was interrupted again.
"No, Finn's right. You might know more about ancient history, but I can't help but feel you'll go off on your own and do something crazy! That's why from now on," began Simon while making a makeshift rope, tying Betty's hands behind her back before handing the rope to Finn, "Finn, you keep an eye on Betty, I've actually got an idea where we're going."
"How?" asked Finn, before securing his end of the rope to his cybernetic arm, while Betty frowned.
Simon sighed mournfully before he explained, "Look, I still remember some things from when I was the Ice King. Not proud of some of it but…Anyway, one thing I remember was a dream I had before the Catalyst Comet nearly hit OOO. Basically it was about Urgence trying (and failing) to stop another Catalyst Comet. Hint: the crown was a major part of that plan."
This little tidbit really got Betty's attention, "You know how the Crown was constructed?!"
"Well, not really… You'd understand if I explain the story: you see, Urgence learned about a Catalyst Comet coming to strike the Earth and he wanted to stop it. He constructed the Crown from science and magic as a wish fulfilment device. He went to the other Elementals to try and get their help, but they wouldn't help because they felt their time was over. Angry at their refusal and unwilling to just lay down and die, Urgence froze them and took what he wanted.
"Now Urgence had an assistant (more like slave if you ask me) a little dinosaur named Gunter. Gunter wanted to make his master proud but Urgence never taught him anything about magic. So as the tragic end to most stories, it was up to Gunter to use the crown to stop the Comet. Unfortunately, his deepest wish was to be like Urgence, so he was turned into the first Ice King. So you see, I had all the memories of Gunter, not Urgence." Simon finished explaining.
The sad story brought Finn to the verge of tears, while Betty was only upset at a source of information about the Crown proving useless…well mostly useless… Simon jump right back into it saying, "Anyway, Gunter had a knack for remembering things. If his memories are correct, where near the Meeting of the Elementals, right before Urgence killed them."
"Well, then I guess we know where Schrodinger's headed. Lead the way Simon!" Finn exclaimed while pointing ahead with his cybernetic arm…which Simon pointed in the opposite direction. As the two bros and their bound prisoner headed off in the direction of the fateful encounter, they couldn't help wonder what exactly was Schrodinger planning on doing…
Elemental Meeting Mesa, same time as OOO Heroes arrival…
"…So you see, mighty Elementals. Urgence is more insane than you realize! You will not be able to convince out of his action, and worse he will kill you! You must strike first to prevent causality chain which will lead to the suffering of billions!" pleaded Schrodinger, in his attempt to sway the Elementals to help him, wearing a ratty burlap cloak over his normal clothes to really sell his story. He had just finished giving them a…slightly revised version of future events.
The Elementals pondered what was said before Chatsberry responded, "You plight is indeed moving. However, while your story is detailed and emotive, you do not have much in the way of hard proof of your claim."
"I believe you know Evergreen well enough to know how he will respond to the Comet's power. If he is allowed to complete the Crown and steal the Comet's power, he will live for millennia untold, becoming more corrupt as he attempts to 'help' people." further explained Schrodinger trying very hard to sell the story.
Balthus rubbed his claw against his chin as he worked over the stranger's words. Urgence had always come off as arrogant, helping people only to receive praise. Still, would he really take on the power of the Comet and destroy them? "It simply seems rash to take the word of a stranger over our own personal experiences."
"What about you, exalted Slimy D?" asked Schrodinger, desperate to get one of the Elementals to believe him. It was a major first part of his plan, after all.
"Yo, my name is Slimy D and I gotta say/Weird stuff be hitting us up today/Evergreen got some whack stuff going down/Gotta-" Slimy D began to rap before being interrupt by Balthus.
"He's with us!" declared Balthus interrupt another boring rap.
"That's not what it sound like to me." muttered Schrodinger, upset that his argument did not seem to be getting any traction.
"We thank you for your warning. We will at least be prepared in case Evergreen tries anything." counseled Chatsberry, seeing Schrodinger upset.
"We'll see…" said Schrodinger before disappearing mysteriously. Just as the devil disappeared, Finn, Simon, and Betty were sneaking their way up the stairs. They had heard the tail end of the conversation and their reactions were mixed.
"So he wants the Ice King's crown?" asked Finn whispering to avoid being heard.
"Well, it was a wish granting artifact before Gunter put it on and overrode the template. But it sounds like he's trying to get the Elementals to fight each other and steal it in the confusion." answered Betty.
"Thankfully he doesn't seem to have succeeded. I have an idea where he's going now too. Ya see…" began Simon before the sound of giant footsteps could be heard, "Someone's coming!" Immediately the Gang hid, correctly guessing it was Urgence Evergreen and his assistant Gunter.
Quickly hiding as best they could, the Gang let Evergreen past though Gunter seemed to see them and tried to tell his master, "Uh, Master Evergreen-"
"Not now, Gunter! I got important biz…" exclaimed Evergreen, wanting to focus on the upcoming meeting. Gunter looked at the strangers before rejoining his master. What happened next was history repeating itself.(1) After Evergreen froze the Elemental while making a snark about 'dooming them to no doom', Evergreen and Gunter began their journey for Magwood's gems. The Group was going to follow but Simon convinced them to instead head for Evergreen's home.
As the Group slowly reached Evergreen's fortress (which to Finn's mind looked a bit like Ice King's castle) he couldn't help but ask, "Okay Simon, what's your deal? You seem to know everything that's going on and…not taking it well."
Simon sighed as they neared the door and replied, "I already told you, because Gunter wore the crown first I remember everything that happened this day, and let me tell…Evergreen did not put on a good show. Each Ice Elemental seems to only be more or less arrogant than he is. I know we have to keep time stable but…"
"Look I know what happened today wasn't great. Heck, it's gonna be the last day of Gunter's life! But do we really want Schrodinger to wear the crown instead?" asked Finn rhetorically. It had already been decided that Schrodinger could not have any good plans with the Crown!
Security was pretty light as the group made it through Evergreen's fort. Whereas Simon had Ice Beasts and Penguins guarding his castle, Evergreen seemed to rely on his rep more. As the group reached the entrance to the Ice Elemental's lab, they could hear the sound of welding and singing;(2)
"Let me call you sweetheart
I'm in love with you
Let me hear you whisper
That you love me too
Simon and Betty circled around while Finn slowly approached the distracted enemy. All the while the sound struck an eerie chord with him because the last time he heard it was near the end of the Elemental Crisis. Specifically, when Princess Bubblegum was taking over all of OOO! This made him wonder just what connection Schrodinger had with the Princess. Of course he was mature enough not to let him distract him in sneak up on the monster as he sang;
"Keep the love light glowing
In your eyes so true
Let me call you sweetheart
I'm in love with you
Meanwhile, Betty and Simon snuck around the room, ready to help grab Schrodinger, thoughts rolling through their heads. Simon was thinking of a way to prevent Gunter from succumbing to his fate. Normally, he wouldn't think about changing history, but the end of the naïve little lizard was just so sad…But first they had to get it away from that demon cat!
Betty's mind was on a similar goal but for slightly different reason. If she could alter the Crown, maybe the future Simon won't succumbing to madness. Heck, if used properly, the Crown could even prevent the Lich from forming! But right now, she focused on supporting the team's efforts. After all, that grudging cat backstabbed her and threw her away like trash! Maybe a good kick in the nots while they get the prize…?
"Keep the love light glowing
In your eyes so true
Let me call you sweetheart
I'm in love with you."
As Schrodinger finished his alterations of the Crown, he took a moment to look over the magical item smiling proudly at his work. All things come to those who planned ahead! Even if the Elementals did not fight Evergreen, he at least got directions to Evergreen's abode from their minds. One of Schrodinger's talents was the ability to read surface, especially loud and long thoughts on a specific subject…
As the group leaped stealthily onto mad cat, he disappeared along with the Crown! Picking themselves up, the group looked around to the sound of Schrodinger's laughter, "AHAHAHAHAHA! I must admit, I'm surprise you changed your strategy from 'Scream and Leap' to 'Stalk and Pounce.' Of course, doesn't help when the 'bad guy' see you in a reflection in the object they're holding."
"What's your game, Ding-a-ling?!" exclaimed Finn, frustrated at Schrodinger's games.
"I'm in it for all the marbles! That mad fool Evergreen will show-up at with the final piece I need to make my first step towards victory possible! Goodbye, OOO, hello…crud I haven't thought a new name for my kingdom yet. This is embarrassing. Would Schrodingerland be too…no, no, it's too much…" Schrodinger's monologue drifted into babble after he left out a portion of his plan (even if it was a minor one).
While Schrodinger was distracted Simon grabbed the Crown out of the cat's claws. Betty wrapped a nearby bag over the head of the surprised demon, further disorienting the villain. Finn held his sword at the ready, about to end Schrodinger once and for all…"What's going on here?!"
It seemed that Evergreen had just finished getting Magwood's jewels and arriving home. Only to come home to a group of thieves fighting with each other and stealing the Crown he had made. Finn quickly put away his sword as he tried to explain, "Uh, this looks bad but there's a very good explanation…"
"You don't need to explain yourself. Like any thief in my home…you need to be DEALT WITH!" shouted Evergreen, angry at this intrusion in his home, before sending a massive ice blast at the group. While Schrodinger was frozen solid, the grin on his face was unnerving… Shaking off any worry, Finn prepared himself to fight the Elemental. Calmly standing his ground, Finn dodged left and right to avoid the ice lightning before charging into Evergreen's guts. Betty and Simon grabbed Evergreen's arms to help pin him down, careful to avoid his hands.
Gunter decided to help his master out, "You leave master Evergreen alone, weirdos!" And proceed to smack his bag against Simon. It would have been cute and pathetic except that Gunter had slightly more strength then his size would indicate. Simon, eventually tired of being battered, kicked Gunter away, though it left him feeling guilty. This distraction was, however, enough for Evergreen to free his hand from Simon's grasp and freeze Betty up to her head in ice!
The rest of the team was quickly frozen and placed in front of Evergreen who said, "I deal with you after I've dealt with the Comet! Miserable thieves…sneaking into my crib…trying to rob me… Now where's the other one?" After looking around for a few minutes, Evergreen spotted Schrodinger's ice prison…only to find it empty!
Suddenly, Evergreen heard the sound of insane laughter from the roof. Checking Gunter's pouch, Evergreen also found Magwood's jewels missing! Quickly the paired rushed upstairs as Schrodinger put the final touches on the Crown. "Finally! Now to get my deepest wish…to take the power of the Comet and remake the world in my image!" declared Schrodinger as he was about to put on the Crown…only to be quickly frozen in place and the Crown snatched away Evergreen!
"I'll be taking that…Thank You!" exclaimed Evergreen confidently just as he was about to place the Crown on his head and save the world…only for Magwood to come bursting in and messing up everything! Half buried under rubble, Evergreen looked around for the Crown, only to find it a couple of floors below him back in his lab. Fortunately, (in Evergreen's mind) Gunter was standing right next to the Crown…
"Gunter! Use the Crown! I can't reach it! Use the Crown to fulfill your deep desire to destroy the Comet!" demanded Evergreen. Gunter picked up the Crown, about to do what he was told when…
"DON'T!" exclaimed Schrodinger, holding out his hand in an authoritative gesture, "You and I both know what your real greatest desire is and if you put that Crown on, you'll be sent spiraling into madness. Let me have the Crown; I have the training to use it properly and I can assure you, the Comet will not be a worry if I use the Crown…"
Gunter was tempted by Schrodinger's offer, because he knew that he would just mess it up either way. He was just about to hand over the Crown to Schrodinger when Simon interrupted, "Gunter NO! You can't trust him! Give me the Crown…look, I'll be honest. The Comet has to hit the Earth. It's a fact relevant to the time-space continuum. But that Cat is right about one thing: you put that Crown on and it will mean suffering uselessly for yourself and others like you!"
As the three cajoled, pleaded, and ordered Gunter, the little dinosaur thought about what to do. Each one of the pleading faces had reasons for Gunter to obey and not obey their suggestion. Evergreen, his creator and father-figure, had the most reason in Gunter minds for him to obey. But recently, Gunter realized that he might not be as important to Evergreen as Evergreen was to him. Of course if he stopped the Comet that might change!
The evil cat person seemed like the last person Gunter should listen to. Everything about him was just…creepy, like though strangers Evergreen told him to avoid. But he seemed to know as much about how to use the Crown as Evergreen, so maybe he had a better chance to 'stop the Comet.' The strange hairless monkey was a complete stranger to Gunter, and yet…there was something familiar about him… As Gunter was making his decision, however, Schrodinger was slowly inching closer to the young dinosaur…
And with a might leap, Schrodinger tackled Gunter and snatched the Crown from his grasp! Before he could put it on, however, Simon kicked the Crown out of his hands…and right over the edge! The group rushed over to see the Crown fall into some lava and melt leaving Magwood's jewels…which were prompt taken by the monster. More shocking than this turn of events, was Schrodinger's reaction:
"BWHAHAHAHAHAHEEE! Well ain't that a kick in the head! Here I was going to absorb all the powers of the Comet, but I guess seeing the Crown removed from history might present some new opportunities…So thanks! See ya around…"
"Hold it!" exclaimed Finn as he rushed in front of Schrodinger with his sword pointed at him.
Schrodinger simply rolled his eyes and stated, "You do realize both I and you simultaneously exist in multiple timelines, right? Wait forgot you're the dumb one of the group…to put it simply, in a few minutes neither you nor I are going to be here, we'll be a few years in the future. It's happen when that Comet hits…right…about…now!"
And as if taking ques from the mad cat, the Catalyst Comet that would eventually form the Mushroom Bomb and the Lich, crashed into the Earth releasing a massive wave of energy, leveling mountains. All the onlookers could do is watch as the wave of energy consumed the land…and them…
Postscript: I do not claim ownership of Adventure Time and any related characters. Only the OC characters and concepts of this story. Again sorry for the delay. Writing out whole episodes can be very time consuming. Plus my dad being in the hospital drains away my creativity. Please read and review!
1 Rather than rewriting that whole part of the episode, I'd recommend watching the Elemental Meeting in "Evergreen"
2 "Let Me Call You Sweetheart" by Bing Crosby