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All characters do not belong to me. I just like to mess with them.

You've got your passion, you've got your pride
but don't you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

-Billy Joel (Vienna)

Flashbacks in Italics.

All I Know

By JLaLa

Chapter Three: Hello, Goodbye

The labor had been grueling for everyone.

It had been almost a day since Katniss's water broke and now they were only a few moments away from seeing their child. Katniss was sitting up in bed in a long shirt as Peeta supported her back. Sweat ran down her face and her jaw was tight as she grit her teeth in pain.

Peeta was excited-and yes it had taken a lot of convincing on his end but eventually Katniss had agreed to have the baby. During the long hours of labor, she had cursed him and called him every expletive that she had ever learned in her twenty-four years of life. She screamed for Prim, Rue, her mother and embarrassingly—Gale. At this point, she wouldn't even look at him. To her, this was all HIS fault.

"Push Katniss," Greasy Sae said as she checked on Katniss's progress. Since Katniss had not spoken to her mother in quite awhile, the older woman had taken the reins as her midwife.

Peeta placed a cool washcloth on Katniss's forehead. Angrily, she slapped his hand away. He bit his lip to hide any hurt that might have been seen on his face. "The head is out."

He could see that Katniss had reached the point that the pain was so intense that she had retreated into herself. The room was silent for a moment. Katniss bared down quietly only screaming when she felt the baby sliding out of her. The little one let out a shrill cry before Greasy Sae was taking it to be cleaned at a nearby changing table.

Peeta sat on the bed and kissed her forehead. She gave him a weak smile. "Katniss, it's a girl," he said and his eyes were wet. He squeezed her hand before joining Greasy Sae. Through the blood and fluid, he could see that her hair was dark. She cried and her eyes opened revealing a brilliant blue. Peeta knew that there was a possibility that her eyes would changed but he hope they didn't.

After Greasy Sae had cleaned her up, she handed her over to Peeta so that she could take care of Katniss. The baby squirmed for a bit but after he rocked her gently she settled into a deep slumber.

He went to Katniss. "Look, she's finally here." Katniss's eyes were glazed as she focused on him. She didn't look at the bundle in his arms. Instead she turned away to her side, the light from the window hitting her pale face. Greasy Sae looked at him sympathetically.

"Give her time," she said as she patted his arm. "It was a rough labor." He nodded and she looked down at the baby. Smiling fondly, she kissed his cheek. "Congratulations."

"Daddy."

Peeta opened his eyes to see the said object of his dream looking at him. She was in her pink striped pajama and was clutching her stuffed duck. Tilting her head, Zoe smiled at him. "Morning Daddy!"

He grinned. "Morning, my Zoe." His Zoe. Not Katniss's. "Why are you up so early?"

She shrugged and he opened his blanket so that she could crawl in and snuggle against him. Her braid was unraveling so Peeta untied it and ran his fingers through her fine hair. He could tell that she was getting sleepy again by her sigh. Peeta never thought that he would be able to know someone's mood by their movements. He knew what every sigh, groan and giggle that Zoe made meant.

He sang to her softly as he continued to run his fingers through her hair.

"And after all the sky has fallen down
And after all the water's washed away
My love's the only promise that remains…"

When Peeta was done, he could hear Zoe's light snore and laughed to himself. Before going back to sleep, he thought about a pair of dark eyes that had walked back into their lives.

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After a few hours of sleep, Peeta woke Zoe up and she glared at him as she sat up groggily. She put her thumb in her mouth which she often did when irritated. She had inherited Katniss's morning disposition for her mother was also not a morning person.

"You have to get up now," he told her as he stood.

"I don't wanna," she said as she removed the thumb from her mouth.

"Not even for pancakes?" Peeta said and tickled her chin.

She shook her head. He picked her up so that they were face to face. "Zoe, what's wrong?"

"We have to say goodbye to Grandpa Haymitch," she replied, her eyes were woeful. "Now we won't ever see him like we don't see Aunt Prim." His heart flooded with affection for his daughter. She did not understand death but knew it meant that you went away for a long time.

"What did Grandpa Haymitch tell you before he went to sleep?" Peeta tried to keep his voice from cracking.

Peeta and Zoe had stayed with Haymitch that last night of his life. He had asked for Katniss even though he knew she wouldn't come. Zoe laid next to the man who she had considered her grandfather and he told her the stories that she loved the most, the ones about her mother.

"He said that he was going to go to the sky," Zoe said solemnly. "That he would be watching over us to make sure that nothing bad would happen, just like he did for you and Mommy."

"Exactly," he replied and held her tight. "So you mustn't be too sad because it would make Grandpa Haymitch sad to see his one and only Zoe cry." She nodded but her lips were already quivering. He held her tighter. "Baby, it's okay." He let her cry into her shoulder. Peeta rocked her until she quieted.

"Daddy?" Her voice was muffled against her shoulder.

"Yes, my love?"

"Can I have blueberry pancakes?" Zoe pulled away and looked at him with watery eyes.

"Of course," he said with a smile.

It was their usual routine on Saturdays. He would make pancakes and entertain her with his pan flipping moves. No matter how many times he had done this for her, she always clapped in excitement. Peeta knew that one day she would be all grown up and these pancake tricks would no longer be interesting to her. He cherished this little bit of time.

He almost felt sorry for Katniss. She had missed so many beautiful moments in their daughter's life. He had to remind himself bitterly that she was the one who chose this.

After breakfast, they dressed for the burial. Peeta put on a black suit with a red tie then combed his hair back. He took a deep breath and tried to settle his nerves.

As he put on his black leather shoes, he thought about the last conversation he had with Haymitch. Peeta had promised that he would take of Haymitch's girls. "Especially that older one." He was referring to Katniss. "She needs more help than you know. Don't think that she left because of you. She has been fighting her demons for years."

Standing up, he went to Zoe's room. The little girl was already dressed. Wearing a grey dress with geese in front for the pockets, she looked lovely. Her long hair was loose and as usual Peeta sat on her bed so that he could braid her hair. He had learned the technique from Greasy Sae's granddaughter and now was a seasoned pro. After he was done, Peeta turned her around to make sure her bangs were neat.

He stood up and held his hand out. "Ready?"

She nodded and they left the room so that they could say goodbye to their beloved friend.

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The burial would be in a nearby meadow which was a few minutes away from Victors Village. Effie had wanted to do it in the Capitol but Haymitch had specifically requested that he be buried in District 12. It was home and it was another 'screw you' to the Capitol, of course.

A large group had already assembled for the burial. The people of the village were present including the Hawthornes, Greasy Sae's family (she had passed on shortly after Zoe's birth) and some old classmates of the former mentor.

"Miss Effie!" Zoe let go of his hand to run to the older woman. In a pinstripe black suit and white wig, Effie was every bit the Capitol woman and stood out in a graying District 12.

"My darling girl!" Effie lifted the little girl up and Zoe wrapped her legs around the woman's waist. Peeta joined them. "Peeta, it is good to see you but such dreadful circumstances." Her accent was as sharp as ever.

Zoe lowered herself from Effie's body and ran to meet Posy. Effie took his arm and leaned into him as they walked. "I saw her you know. She was with the Mason woman and him. Do you think it's wise that she is getting close to Zoe?" Effie had always had more of a soft spot for Peeta as he was always a good boy during the games. Katniss has fought Effie on everything from clothes to interviews.

"Katniss is her mother," he replied as they walked. "Be nice to her, she's having a hard time also."

As they approached, he saw that Katniss was already there. Her hair was down today and she was beautiful. Katniss stood on her own away from the crowd simply staring at the closed coffin.

Peeta could hear the whispers of the crowd. Many of townspeople loved Zoe and were quick to her defense. Needless to say, they were unhappy to see that the mother who abandoned her had suddenly decided to show her face.

When they had all gathered, Peeta called out to get everyone's attention. "Thank you for coming. We've come to say goodbye to our dear friend, Haymitch Abernathy." He pulled something out of his pocket before addressing the crowd. "Haymitch always took care of me and my daughter Zoe. He wasn't perfect and never tried to be. He was truthful even when I didn't want to hear it. He helped me put my life back together and everything I learned about being a good father came from him." It had not been the best speech but it was a truthful one.

Zoe went to his side. "Grandpa Haymitch always let me feed his geese and if they bit me he always yelled at them." A soft chuckle was heard through the crowd. "I will miss him but he is in the sky with my Aunt Prim and Miss Rue." Peeta looked up to see Katniss staring at him, her expression unreadable.

Effie spoke of his devotion as a mentor in the Hunger Games while Greasy Sae's granddaughter talked about the time that Haymitch sold a case of his coveted liquor to help her grandmother when she was sick. Peeta wondered if Katniss would speak. Instead she clasped her hands together still staring at the coffin.

As they began the final preparations, he gave Zoe what he had pulled from his pocket. Taking her hand, they walked to the coffin and put the last picture of Zoe and Haymitch together. He looked gaunt but happy with his little Zoe. Peeta didn't want to remember him looking like that. It was better to bury that memory.

It was when the coffin began to lower, and the crowd silenced did he hear the gasping. It was Katniss. She look like she was about to fall over as she put her hands to abdomen. He could tell that she was trying not to cry out.

Zoe pulled at his hand and her eyes were pleading with him. "Daddy, she is all alone. Please."

Zoe knew that they had fought but didn't understand why. Together they went to her and Peeta found himself pulling Katniss into his arms. Zoe wrapped her arms around her mother's waist. Katniss cried into his shoulder as she pulled Zoe closer to her.

They remained like this for several minutes as the burial ended and people left.

"Well, you all know how to put on a show," Johanna said when they pulled away.

Peeta scoffed. "Well, we are the experts on pretending, aren't we?" He found himself saying thinking of the years that he and Katniss pretended to be lovers. "Why don't we go over to my house? Effie, I'm sure you'd like something to drink and eat before you take the train out."

"What?" Effie had been too busy staring at their joined hands. He could almost hear her describing the "rekindled love of her District 12 lovers" to her cohorts. It would be all over the Capitol only minutes after she exited her train. "Oh yes, that would be lovely."

They all set out towards Peeta's home. Zoe walked in between them holding each of their hands. Effie walked ahead, her heels clicking against the road. Johanna and Gale joined them.

"Pretending, my ass," Johanna muttered to him with a smile before Gale led her away. Gale gave him a wary look before they walked ahead.

Peeta's gaze wandered back over to Katniss who had remained silent the whole time. She seemed to be in her own dream state and she looked relaxed as she held Zoe's hand.

Zoe smiled up at her. "Mommy, your hair is pretty," the little girl said breathily. "Daddy always says that your hair was prettiest hair he's ever seen." She turned to look at him and he felt his cheeks burning. "Besides my hair."

Katniss laughed quietly. "Well I've always liked blond hair like your Aunt Prim's and your daddy's."

There they were again. They were always playing off each other. Just like the old days.

However, Peeta didn't know what her motives were this time. He didn't know what he was feeling except confusion and heat. He hated it, that feeling of wonderful heat that spread within him whenever she was near. As a boy, he watched her at school and when she sang he had been a goner. As a man, he knew the curves and planes of her body. He knew where and how to kiss to make her comply.

Their adult relationship had begun as innocent explorations of one another. They had sought enjoyment where they could because there was still so much pain in their world. When they were finished each time, she would leave and he would feel empty.

When she had left, he realized there wasn't much reason for her to stay. Their friendship was over when those two lines appeared on that pregnancy test. It wasn't much of a friendship anyway. They never talked during that time.

Zoe was the reason he was so angry at her. If there was any reason to stick around, it was the baby that she had carried for nine months. His Zoe. Didn't she feel anything looking at that baby when she was born? Was there any reaction when she kicked inside Katniss's belly? He never trusted himself to ask in fear that he already knew the answer. It wasn't a good one.

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When they entered the house, he set off to the kitchen to prepare a tray of cakes and tea for Effie. As he leaned against the counter, he heard footsteps and turn to see Gale standing there. The two never felt the need to get to know one another or get along but somewhere along the way Peeta found that he wanted to know more about Katniss's life. Gale was a pretty big part of it and he was curious to know how he had fit into her life for these last four years.

"I was kicked out because they needed girl talk," he informed Peeta.

"I don't know how I feel about my daughter being around while Effie shares the sex secrets of the Capitol."

The two men shared a laugh. "I'm sure it's just idle gossip. Johanna doesn't like people thinking she's a girl. She has other ways of proving herself."

"How did that happen? You and Johanna?"

"We bonded over assigned missions together then eventually over making sure Katniss remembered to eat," he replied.

"Was it that bad?"

"When she first came," Gale recalled. "She wouldn't come out of her room. Or she would disappear for long periods of time. Johanna and I would spend a lot of time waiting to see if she would even call."

The tea kettle whistled bringing them out of their memories. Peeta poured the water into the teapot and picked up the tray. Gale followed suit picking up the plate of cake.

When they entered the room, Peeta caught a quick flash of an envelope going into Katniss's pocket. He set the tray down and the group fixed their cups while Zoe bit into each piece of cake. After a look from Effie, Zoe retreated and sat back in-between her parents, her back straight with a smile on her face.

Effie put her cup down after a sip. "So Katniss, when are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow on the noon train."

His heart sank when he saw the stricken look on Zoe's face.

"You're leaving?"

Katniss turned to her daughter. "I have to Zoe. I live in the Capitol."

Zoe's lips trembled. "But you said you would stay with me. You said always." Tears had already spilled onto her reddening cheeks. "You said so!" She leaped from her seat and rushed up the stairs. They could hear her sobbing from below.

Peeta stood up. "This is what I meant Katniss about making her promises. It's really my fault. I should have explain to her that 'always' means nothing to you." He felt disgusted with himself for hoping. He looked at her once more in disappointment before ascending stairs to comfort his daughter.

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Later that night after Effie had departed with Gale, Johanna and Katniss, Peeta laid in bed with Zoe curled up against him. He listened to her sigh in his sleep and pulled her closer. His mind drifted to when he first found out about Zoe.

Peeta had found her sitting by the window in her bedroom. Her knees were pulled up to her chest and she still wore her nightgown though it was late in the afternoon.

As he approached her, he caught a glimpse of a little white stick that was placed next to her. Peeta froze and picked it up. There were two. Two pink lines. He sat down next to her. "So you're…"

She nodded and put her head on her knees. "Yes, I am."

"What do we do?" he asked her. They had never talked about their relationship or whatever it was considered. The two had always slept with one another to keep their nightmares at bay. Everything else that they did just evolved from sharing a bed.

Despite all this, Peeta was thrilled. He tried desperately to hide his excitement. Naively he thought that this was what he wanted. He had always wanted to be with Katniss, to love her and eventually marry her. Then in time, they would have kids. So it had happened in backward order but that didn't deter him from letting a little hope grow in him.

Their eyes met and she looked at him for a moment. She started and moved back. "Oh God, you want to have it, don't you?" It was more of a statement than a question."Peeta, this isn't the best time—"

"—Katniss, it will never be the best time for you. I know you're scared. But I want this. I want this with you." He took her hand. "I swear I'll be a saint. I will let you win every fight. I won't push you on anything—except this."

Katniss sat staring at him skeptically. "I win every fight?" she asked with a small smile.

Eventually she agreed. Thinking back now, he had pushed her because he was afraid that she would leave him. He thought that a baby would keep her there and that in time she would grow to love him or her. He had hope that she would learn to love him too.

Katniss was never one to be pushed into anything.

Now he was paying for it. Now Zoe was paying for it. Guilt gripped his insides and instinctually he held his daughter close. Despite it all, he was so thankful to have her. In the world of regrets that he and Katniss lived in, he never for one second of his day ever regretted Zoe.

Being hurt by Katniss was second nature now. Not for Zoe however. He knew that she would live her life trying to figure out what had made her mother leave her not once but twice. He didn't want her to question herself because she was growing up into a wonderful person. Before he slept, Peeta told himself that he would let Katniss go forever. He would show Zoe that they could go on without her.

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That morning Zoe was sullen and quiet. She didn't want breakfast and held tight to her stuffed duck. They were going to meet Katniss, Johanna and Gale at the station so they could say goodbye.

"Are you going to talk to me, little one?" He zipped her jacket as he asked. Instead of answering, she stuck her thumb in her mouth. Peeta noticed that her face was devoid of color and he felt her forehead. Her temperature seemed normal.

"Let's go." They descended down the stairs and out the door hand in hand. As they walked he chattered about the recipes he would be working on at the bakery that week in hopes that it would spark her interest. She remained quiet and distant reminding him of Katniss. Though she resembled Katniss, her personality was usually all Peeta.

When they reach their short distance, they found the three travelers waiting for them at the platform. The train was already there but was refueling for the long trip back.

"Hey sweetie," Gale said and picked up the little girl. "I'm going to miss you." She wrapped her arms around his neck.

Johanna kissed her cheeks and tickled the girl so that she let out a small laugh. "Now there's that smile. You call me okay?" The girl nodded.

Gale put her down and Katniss went to her. Peeta could tell that there was something on her mind and for a moment, he feared that she would ask to take Zoe with her.

Zoe stood not reacting to her mother. He could tell that Katniss was hurt. So he chose to support Katniss's decision to go by pulling her into his arms. She clung to him and he buried his face in her hair. When he pulled back, he wiped the tear that trickled down her face. "Try to visit more."

She nodded and looked to Zoe who now clinging to his leg. She lifted Zoe's chin with her finger. "Won't you say goodbye?" The little girl burrowed her face into Peeta's side. Katniss sighed and kissed the top of her head. "I love you Zoe."

Katniss stood up and looked at him with pain in her eyes. He nodded to her understandingly. He would be strong for Zoe.

As she walked away, Peeta felt Zoe shift. "Don't go." She was suddenly rushing towards Katniss. The woman pulled her into her arms. "Don't go Mommy! Please. Please." Tears rushed down her face. "I'll do anything. I will wear dresses and learn to twirl better. Please don't leave me."

"You are perfect and I don't want you to change," she said as she held the girl

"Then why are you leaving?"

Peeta watched the scene and felt his own eyes prickling. He saw it then. The flash of something in her eyes.

Katniss took a deep breath and turned to Gale and Johanna.

"I'm sorry. I'm not going back with you."

Yea! So she stayed! What happens now? Well you'll just have to wait for the next chapter. I've been doing some research on separation anxiety in children. You might see some of these issues continue in Zoe.

I am overwhelmed with the response from everyone. Please keep on reviewing as it does boost a girl's spirit. Peeta was awesome to write but he did have his doormat moments. There is also one movie line in this. Did you see it?

Answers to some questions:

1. Katniss and Peeta are 24 when Zoe was born making them 28 in current time. Coincidentally the same age as I am now. Trust me when I tell you that your mindset at 24 and 28 are completely different. There is one part that does reveal their ages. Hope you found it. Gale is 29 and Johanna is in her early 30's.

2. Yes, there will be flashback between present time and before Zoe's birth. Maybe even the conception night though I am no good at those kinds of scenes.

3. Still debating a rival who might not be much of a rival.

I am sorry that this chapter was so long but it might be up to a week till my next chapter. I've noticed that my chapters are getting increasingly longer. Some people like it, some don't. This is what happens when you have nothing to do at work but spend your time writing into a notebook.

Review, review!

-JLaLa