Chapter 3: Curtailed

Spock departed the meeting more perplexed than he was when he went in. The captain left in just as bad of a mood as he was earlier in the week, despite everyone's best efforts to alter his temperament. It was confusing… and a bit disheartening. Even in the face of an assignment he had been looking forward to for years on end, Spock's friend remained in as foul a mood as ever.

'Jim is irrational at the best of times, and this is hardly the best time for him,' Spock thought as he boarded the elevator at the end of the hall. The remembrance and rechristening ceremony had most of Spock's colleagues on edge, though from what the first officer could see, the cause of each of his friends' stress varied. Nyota's anxiety mostly came from pre-mission nerves and from her friends' stress. She had very little else to be concerned with and had always cared deeply for her friends' wellbeing.

If Sulu and Scotty were to be believed, then Lieutenant Chekov was in a relationship. If that were true then the reason he was on edge was due to the stress put on his Earth-bound relationships with friends and family by the impending mission. His youth would also play a part; he would be spending the entirety of his early twenties in a high-stress environment, away from most people his own age. Spock couldn't help the twinge of worry he felt for the young lieutenant, though he did his best to stamp it down. Chekov was a highly sympathetic boy as well; the increase in worry in everyone around him would affect him more than many others among the crew...

Not that the uneasy atmosphere wouldn't affect the others. Spock knew that to be untrue because he himself was feeling almost apprehensive. He knew that the others would feel the general atmosphere more strongly and it would therefore feed and feed off of their own negative emotions. Hikaru would probably be most affected by Pavel's mood in particular, and Pavel seemed to be feeling the doctor's fear and annoyance in addition to his other emotions. This was not a surprise to Spock; since about eight months prior the two had been increasingly close. Doctor McCoy had become borderline overprotective of the young lieutenant; as the elevator doors closed in front of him, Spock had to wonder whether it was because of the doctor's lack of contact with his own family. As far as Spock was aware, McCoy had not developed much of a social life outside of the command crew of the Enterprise and had limited contact with his ex-wife. Spock did not know of any other family members that the doctor may have and therefore concluded that any he did have he was not very close to.

The elevator began to descend. 'The captain and Doctor McCoy are friends, and the doctor has an almost obsessive need to care for anything broken. The captain has never been exactly whole, but is certainly not at this moment. McCoy is most likely more affected by the captain's agitation than anyone else in the crew,' Spock reflected. The captain. The sources of his stress were numerous. He had died the last time he was on a mission, after all. As Scotty had said earlier in the week, "That's bound to leave a bad taste in your mouth." The captain also had the hopes and expectations of Starfleet riding on his shoulders, and was being trusted with a newly rebuilt ship that had played a part in the death of not only dozens of crew members but also of thousands of civilians. The captain received death threats more often than bills in the mail, and was being held accountable – if unofficially – for those thousands of civilian deaths. Starfleet said that Kirk had acted admirably, especially since he had actually died in the line of duty.

When the story reached the media, though, Janus was their patron god. One week, the captain was another victim of Khan's attack and the next there were conspiracy theories about Jim Kirk instigating the whole thing and then covering it up with the help of corrupt officials. There was guilt and worry and apprehension and anger and fear in the captain and it was eating away at him. Spock had never liked metaphors, but this one seemed appropriate. If ever a man had been haunted by ghosts of the pasts, it was Jim. If left unchecked, they would devour him and all that would be left would be the empty shell of the man that had once been.

'And if all of that were not enough to cause concern…' Spock considered the exclusion certain facts in the meeting. Or rather, the odd exclusion of a single number. The command crew had covered everything that had needed to be discussed in that final meeting. Everything except one number that may have instigated the captain's horrible week-long temper to begin with.

The elevator dinged as it reached the first floor and instead of turning left toward the exit, Spock turned right and made his way through the maze of corridors that lead to the admirals' offices. He knocked on the door third from the end of the hall.

"Come in," a voice called. Spock opened the door.

"Admiral," Spock acknowledged.

"Commander."

"Admiral, I have a concern," the first officer said, and then allowed the door to swing shut behind him.

-X-

As promised, here's chapter 3. Chapter 4 is longer, so that may take a little while to get up.