Author's notes: It's been a long time since I've written much of anything. I have little excuses to offer outside of boredom, work, school and other life problems. Upon rediscovering my love for this game a bit, I've decided to continue my fanfiction ventures with more of Sir Daniel's misadventures, so to those that have seen my works and awaited more, I am sorry for taking so long to answer back. For those that have just started reading my works, I welcome you. It is my wish that if God willing I can continue writing stories like this while still being able to juggle all the stuff I have to do. I would be happy if you were to leave a review upon reading the chapter, but for now, it's time for another cadeverous caper with the bravest coward that lived,... and died, ... and then lived again.

Disclaimer: I don't own MediEvil, or the Wizard of Oz Scarecrow song bit used in this chapter. I did create the character Griff, so that's another story.

-MediEvil: The Hero that Almost Wasn't-

Chapter 3: Hilltop Headaches.

Daniel Fortesque found himself confused, he was certain he was in the cemetery, yet found himself magicked into an already familiar place, just be certain, he consulted a nearby gargoyle, who apparently, was waiting for his arrival

"Welcome to the Hall of Heroes, where the bravest warriors from history spend eternity, feasting, singing and arm wrestling! If they think you are worthy enough you may be able to persuade them into giving you a new weapon."

Before Dan could ask a question, Griff's shrouded form emerged from the nether. "I was wondering when you show up again, Sir Dan. Have you brought it with you?"

"Um... brought what"

"It's the very reason you're here, Dan. Give it to me." Griff asked .

Rather than answer the caretaker, Dan rummaged through his armor, pulling out everything he collected so far. Eventually, Griff stopped him when he at last produced the golden chalice from the cemetery.

"Geez, Dan, ever heard of a haversack?" Griff asked as he scooped up the chalice.

"Well, I have been dead for a hundred years." Dan shrugged sarcastically.

"... Follow me."

Dan followed Griff into the great hall, now furbished with lit torches in the sconces, banners and tapestries hanging on the walls, and the mighty oak table was cleaned, it looked more like an edifice fit for a king.

"So what's this cup thingy for?" Dan asked

"It's a long story, Dan.." Griff walked behind a pedestal with the chalice in hand. On top of it was a book of sorts, the hall keeper flipped through the pages until he found what he was looking for. "Listen well, Fortesque to what I have to tell you. The cup you have brought me is an artifact known as the Chalice of Souls. It collects the souls of those slain in battle, and if enough souls are absorbed into it, the chalice becomes corporeal, allowing you to take it... ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?!"

"...Huh?" Dan asked, he held his skull in his hand looking unusually poised. "Sorry, my head was elsewhere."

Griff groaned in exasperation before he continued. "Because of your dishonorable death, your place here is question of being surplus to quota." He pointed to a lone alter set against the wall. "The other heroes are willing to forgive your crimes one condition. If you can gather all the chalices scattered throughout Gallowmere and prove yourself a True Hero, then you will be forgiven. Though I don't know why they bothered to..To tell you the truth, you shouldn't even be alive.. looks like you have Zarok to thank for that .

"It's as simple as all that?" Dan asked hopefully.

"No." came a harsh answer. "The other chalices are more cleverly hidden, some of them guarded by ferocious monsters. Which is why they have decided to another amendment to your quest."

"Such as?"

" Offer the chalices you've collected as homage to the heroes here and they may help you. Try it over there and see?"

Daniel looked around and saw one of the statues glowing with a pale green light. He felt a little sad as he recognized the statue's likeness, a gangly looking bard with a crossbow resting under his right hand. Dan placed the gold chalice before the statue and to his surprise, the statue came to life!

"Captain Fortesque! It's me, Canny Tim. Does the battle go well?"

"Not too good." Dan moaned.

"How I wish I could fight at your side again, sir... but hold! You could take my crossbow! It's got rapid fire and you can ricochet the darts off the walls to shoot around corners. I used it at the Battle of Gallowmere. After you were slain, I used it to slay Zarok's champion, Lord Khardok, a clean kill through the eye at some several hundred yards away-"

"GET ON WITH IT!!!" Dan thundered impatiently.

Tim became irked at the interruption. "Not that there's anything clever about shooting someone in the eye, sir.."

"Watch it!" Dan threatened, the eye comments were annoying him.

"Duh! Goodbye, sir."

With a sheepish answer, Tim became solid stone once more, but not before his crossbow poofed in front of Dan. He looked pleased as he examined the weapon,from composition to twang.

"A little rough, don't you think?" Griff asked. "I mean, he was a friend of yours, after all."

Dan sighed. "Yeah, maybe I'm just having a bad day."

"All the more reason to collect the chalices and put an end to Zarok's madness. Now off you go, your not-so heroics are stinking up the place."

Putting the Hall of Heroes behind him, Dan emerged from the gloom, now he was at the heart of the cemetary, chills began to creep down his spine as he remembered tales saying this area was haunted... at the top of the great hill was situated the center of the area; the Hilltop Mausoleum. Every once a week, sermons were held here when there wasn't the funeral on the side, but there was a legend about that place, Dan recalled, that made it infamous..

Zarok had come here looking for the rumored demon who ruled the mausoleum, but as he started towards the door, something stirred his curiosity, he peered down from the hilltop and was suddenly inflamed. At the far end past the graves, he spotted a familiar annoyance in the form of a skeleton-at-arms. "So, even from the shackles of death, my old enemy pursues me." Zarok spoke aloud. A sneer on his shriveled face melted into a grin "You are too late, Fortesque, already my army has risen from the grave. You will Never leave this necropolis!" laughing wickedly, Zarok plunged his trident into the ground, casting magical waves at two gargoyle statues flanking the mausoleum entrance.

The stone creatures opened their mouth s and began to spew boulders that rolled down the squifly path down the hill, ending at a pond of lava at the base.

Dan sliced down two zombies before they could let out their callous moans as he gazed at his surroundings. The road to the hill top was near his left, as was a stone hut. "Yeesh, zombies, zombies and more zombies!" Dan snided as he cut down what seemed to be a disorganized mob of the living dead. To his dismay, a few of the gangrene shamblers grabbed him from behind. Despite struggling with all his might, Dan could do nothing since all the muscles he had were bones. "Get your grimy hands off me..." Dan suddenly remembered; he still had his sword. Taking a chance, he concentrated on his weapon then before they could begin their assault, Dan's sword flashed in a mighty arc, shredding the cadavers like wheat before a scythe. "...I always wondered if that trick would work." Dan groaned as he grabbed his head to stop the spinning. With the zombies laid back to rest, Dan headed towards the right eastern section of the hillside. He found a few loose graves, a campfire burning, and a doorway built into the cliff blocked off with a boulder. Dan found a book and leafed back towards the beginning. Apparently, an archeologist was planning to explore Gallowmere through its many secret passages. . The last entries were scwarled hastily, but Dan was able to decipher the last passage:

Of great archaeological Interest. Destroy the boulder and plunder the valuable treasures within.

"...Looks like the zombies ran him of." Dan mused. He looked around and found a large boulder fixed into the cliff side. He reached for it and started to pull. "It's stuck.." Dan pulled harder... nothing, then he dug in his metal shoes, sucked in the air and pulled with all the might his backbones could muster. The strain was so great that Dan would turn red with sweating beading all over his face if he was not already bereft of his bodily effects. Still, the boulder did not budge. "Why you, I oughta-" Dan kicked the boulder: not very smart. "OW!! oww, ooh, ugh, ouch..." the skeleton screamed as his hopped about clutching his stubbed toes. After his fit of pitiful moaning, Dan took a closer look at the stone, then he drew his short sword and sliced it.. no luck. "There has to be a way to get rid of this rock." He tapped his skull in thought. "...It's hard to think when nothing's left up there.. If I only had a brain.." Dan sang to himself as he backtracked towards towards to the lava pond. It was a problem, even worse, the road leading to the Mausoleum was riddled with boulders rolling down to the pool. Dan thought about this then an idea came to him.He put his skull atop the pommel of his sword and raised the blade above his is shoulders. "Hee hee, I can see everything!" Dan giggled at his new discovery. "I should call this trick the 'peris-skull'." To the left of the pool, he saw a gateway sealed off by boulders. "No surprises there.." further left, he saw a campfire and even more zombies near a stone shed. They were eager to meet Dan for dinner but a few servings of sword slices to the guts silenced their appetites forever. Sadly for Dan, there were a few late guests hungry for seconds. Upon seeing a meal to go, they promptly gave chase. Dan spotted a chest of sorts not too far away; but this one was different: marked with a skull-and-crossbones pattern. "Hmm?" Dan sliced the chest open and saw a small black gem. Oblivious to the zombies behind him he examined the gem but was in for a shock: once the gem hit the ground, it exploded with an archaic force, the zombies close by were overcome by the concussive push and were instantly slain. Poor Dan was thrown over a wall behind him, back to where he first came it.

"Ow, if I had ears, they'd be ringing." the undead knight grumbled as he got up. Something caught his attention; a book. Seeing no zombies in sight, he grasped the ends with his bony digits:. "..some obstructions... club and other weapons?.... Where's a club?" The area was pretty small so there was one way to find out for sure: Dan needed to get to high ground. He headed towards the mausoleum path and cleared the lava with a running jump. The next sight took Dan by such surprise his bulged nearly twice in size! The boulders were rolling down the hill more quickly than before. "Yipes!" Dan screamed as leaped over one that would have squashed him flat, only to barely dodge three more in tandem. Without time to panic. Dan scrambled up the path, but an orange boulder took him unexpectedly, he had barely time to raise his shield before the impact knock Dan down the hill. The knight saw a odd,hunchback-like zombie charge at him,but a brief flash of his short sword saw the green skinned creep dead. A second creep tackled Dan to the ground and began to bite at him. "OW! Hey, can't you see I don't have any skin!?" Dan protested as he fumbled for his sword, it took a bit before he severed the assailant's head and arms from its body. "That guy must have been a grubber... another chest, huh?" Dan mused as he walked across the red dragon etched into the ground. Dan opened the chest and grinned: a club! It is as simple as it looked; a big brown piece of wood with a heavy head. A book nearby as well. Dan quickly scanned it's writings: The club is a crude, but effective weapon! Bash with it! Burn with it! But beware, one bash too many and it will break!

Grinning with glee, Dan ran across the area to the boulders blocking the gate and shattered his way free. "Sweet!" Just then, an idea came as if a lit candle appeared over Dan's head. He ran over to the cavern that gave him so much trouble and with one mighty swing, the rock was reduced to dust. As Dan wandered in, he realized the cave was actually some kind of hall, the walls were slates of fines stone with torch scones, the most interesting of all was the gargoyle head that coughed and sputtered. " Aaaah- fresh air!" It sighed, then turned it's yellow eyes towards Dan. "We hates these dark old caves and their filthy stench of old witches. A coven of the warty old hags lived here once- unholy fires burning all night while they brewed up unspeakable muck in their cauldrons."

"That must be rough." Dan said in his hallow voice.

The gargoyle head nodded. "They moved on years back but the smell still makes our eyes sting."

Then the ornament turned dormant again.

Dan thought about it a little. He remembered telling King Peregrin a few tales involving witches when he was alive. They were pretty good for chills on hot summer nights. One time he tried asking Zarok what he knew about witches but to his disgust saw the sorcerer with a dead cat... those were different times thought, now the shriveled old man was launching a coup against the kingdom and he was the only standing keeping Gallowmere from suffering a horrible fate. Steeling his courage, Dan strode through the door at the end and sliced down two zombies unawares. This room was larger than the hall, with two flights of stairs. The telltale moan of more zombies were apparent. Dan walked across the smaller stairwell and made short work of the moaning cadaver. Right against the wall was a bookshelf, but it looked out of place, thought Dan. He reached for a book but regretted it when he saw some of the contents in this book: The complete fool's guide to alchemy, How to gather more Eyes of Newt in 3 nights or less, How to get your skeleton Its Whitest.. the list went on, but Dan crammed the book back as he felt himself turn green. Not wanting to know what other macabre interests these witches had, he smashed the bookshelf with his club and found another room at its end. A solitary torch lit up the small round chamber, there were four more bookshelf s standing around the room, but there was a solitary book open on its pedestal. "... What can be worse than learning all that freaking stuff?" Dan asked himself as he read the book, which-to Dan's relief, was something interesting:

-A GUIDE TO COVENS-

-for witches and witchcraft enthusiasts

A Witches Coven would reach the height of its power only when all of their Sacred Flames were alight.

Witches have been known to offer help to the questing adventurer, yet they are a reclusive people and have to be summoned by the aid of mystic charms or Talismans.

"Hmm, now where does one find these talismans?" Dan mused as he returned to the coven interior. He climbed the stairs again and found a zombie guarding the upper floor, a few quick sword thrusts put soon put the creature out of its misery. Dan didn't like what he saw on the other end, this room had six prison cells holding zombies behind steel bars, half-crazed with hunger and fury.. "Ugh.. wait a minute there's gold in here, another shield,... a vial of that green stuff... and a Chalice!" Indeed one of the Chalice of Souls was behind a set of steel. There was a unlit scone it the center of the room, but Dan lamented what it meant, he would need to light it up an release the inmates. One quick rundown the stairs later, Dan used the club as a makeshift torch and ran back, carrying the flame like some sort of sacred symbol held for a set of games in another country Dan couldn't remember at the moment. As he put the flame to the sconce, the zombies lunged for him. Dan screamed as he ran around, dodging the dead that doggedly wanted to kill him, it was after they crashed together, that Dan found the break he wanted, he drew his short sword and hacked them down as they came. When the last zombie had been slain Dan took a moment to soak in the victory. While he was a coward, he was pleased that now he could hold his own against the shambling dead. As he claimed his spoils, Dan saw an unusual relic; a golden star set in a circle.. he examined it carefully... "This must be one of those talisman thingies, then." After stuffing all this and a hard earned chalice down his suit Dan left the coven and headed back to the hill, the boulders still being churned from the gargoyle statues on top. "Oh great, the boulder run again." This time though, Dan had an easier time, jumping over boulders when he could, blocking the rest with his shield. While copper wasn't made to take too much punishment, Dan found replacements as he made his way towards the top, with two bags of gold as a bonus. The gargoyles on top realized that this knight as no pushover, to stop him they would need to get serious, and verily did they spewed their payloads at a frantic rate. Dan tried to hurry to the top, but it was n uphill battle, his shield was wearing out from the onslaught of rolling stones, then an orange boulder squashed him from above. Dan popped himself out from his newly made imprint and made a mad dash up the path. Tired, battered, and out of breath, Dan cleared the top when the two gargoyles that have given him so much grief turned their heads towards each other and talked in a grim tone. "... We have failed the Master! We give our lives!" Dan watched as the statures began to burn, then explode into tiny flaming rocks. The Mausoleum was a terrible sight, two large stained glass windows flanked the door, which was peppered with Zarok's green gunk. As Dan slumped into the nearby rejuvenating fountain, he thought about what the gargoyles said about the demon. It was a safe bet that Zarok was here to try and recruit the abomination for his cause, but now was a chance to stop the sorcerer, provided he was still here. Dan grasped the iron-wrought handle and gulped as he opened the door to the Hiltop Mausoleum...

I would be happy if you were to leave a review on your way out. Thank you and good night.