Jack: this is basically a long one shot or it will be the third chapter of the Jedi Chronicles where everyone except Alicia tries to cheer me up and I get pissed off because everything is Michael's idea.
Alicia: do I appear?
Jack: In the disaster of a dinner where I argue with Harold and your step father and their attempts to convince you to move to Yarra Hills which fail my fight with the disguised Sectrilis until I end up in a duel with Sectrilis in his super powered form and nearly dying in hospital and saving your father's life.
Sectrilis: HOLMES!
Jack: go kill Sidious he's trying to convince Pseudos to join him.
Sectrilis: SIDIOUS DON'T STEAL MY OBEDIENT MINIONS!
(Sidious screams like a girl and runs away Anakin Mace and Padme join Sectrilis temporarily)
Jack: before you ask in these author notes he can only kill Palpatine and Jar-Jar otherwise nothing works.
Sidious: why me?
Jack: you're an idiotic Scarface sleemo who turned my second favourite character into Darth Vader and he killed my favourite character.
Alicia: Jack owns nothing except his characters and the inspiration is the shadow759's video Shadow the Hedgehog can smile go check out his videos.
Curtis walked up to his girlfriend Mikaela when not on dates with him she hung out with Jack and Jack's best friend with an important question kissing Curtis she walked off to hang out with Jade before he could ask.
"Hey Michael have you seen Jack smile?" Curtis asked having sought the Pyromaniac out.
"What?" Michael asked coughing as a bomb exploded.
"Have you seen Jack smile?" Curtis repeated.
"Double what look at him he's emo emos never smile" Michael said the last of the Shadow Jedi was sharpening his sword glaring at nothing having returned from a fight with Sectrilis.
"Go make him smile" Michael said.
"You do it" Curtis said.
"But it's dangerous" Michael said not wanting to face his obviously irate best friend.
"I know that's why I'm making you do it besides he is your friend" Curtis said.
"Damn your logic" Michael growled walking over to Jack.
"Hey Jack Hey Jack Hey Jack" Michael said.
"What" Jack growled angrily.
"Knock Knock" he said A sword was pointed at his face Michael cleared off.
An hour later he tried again.
"Hey Jack do you want to know what makes me smile" Michael said.
Two hours later Jack and Curtis looked ready to kill Michael.
"How was it" he asked.
"I know why you don't have a girlfriend you hire Strippers monthly" Curtis asked going to find Mikaela the only girl who he would not mind seeing as a stripper.
"Michael I'd run if I were you" Jack growled sword out.
"Oh shiiiiit" Michael said legging it Jack giving chase.
That afternoon Michael visited Alicia to explain their problem.
"Sectrilis" he growled when Harold Nichols answered the door.
"Yes Me Tracy give Holmes this message Alicia is mine" Nichols sneered sending Michael on a flight.
"What the hell happened to you?" Jack asked looking down at his friend.
"Bananas" Michael said dazedly Jack punched him.
"AHHHH DON'T KILL ME!" Michael yelled.
"No time for your crazy mutterings what happened to you?" Jack repeated impatiently.
"I went to visit Alicia and got sent on a flight" Michael said.
"You WHAT!" Jack yelled.
"I went to visit Alicia and her boyfriend Harold Nichols sent me on a flight" Michael said.
"HE IS WHAT!" Jack yelled and turned a stony glare towards Michael.
"He is Alicia's Boyfriend and told me to tell you she was his" Michael said.
"Go away you fucking arsehole" Jack said entering his hut and slamming the door.
"Oh shit I fucked up" he said to himself and ran off the next day Curtis approached him.
"So any Luck?" Curtis asked.
"Nope managed to make him more emo" Michael said.
"I thought I saw Jack punching a tree" Mikaela said invading the conversation.
"Weren't you just stripping for Curtis just then?" Michael asked Curtis blushed while Mikaela glared.
"Damn you Michael you revealed one of my fantasies" Curtis hissed.
"I can go strip for you now if you want" Mikaela said Curtis nodded and the two left.
"Young love just warms my heart" Michael said with a smile.
"Now to set up my best friend quick Jade to the Explocave" Michael said.
"No to the drawing board the Explocave is plan B" Jade replied.
"Oh right my bad" Michael said and the two ran off.
"What do you want" Jack growled hours later.
"Um Jade is inviting you to dinner with the Gemptons" Michael said.
"I'll go alright now go blow up that building scheduled for demolition or something" Jack said Michael left.
"Was that Michael?" Obi-wan asked.
"Yes and I'm going out to dinner with a friend be back in a few hours" Jack said Obi-wan nodded before returning to the poker room with Vader.
"Jade Jack welcome" Mikaela said happily hugging them then Jack shook hands with her father.
"Any cases solved?" he asked.
"Tons George led them all he's usually making a game out of it but after the argument he has stopped treating things like a game all of us are worried about him" Arthur said.
"Argument?" Jack asked tilting his head to one side in confusion.
"Yeah one night after Alicia was in bed Gwen and George had a huge argument about her boyfriend Gwen kicked him out afterwards" Arthur replied.
"A simple argument is no excuse for kicking someone out" Jack said making a mental note to visit George.
"Right let's go" Jade said and the family headed for the pub.
"Arthur" Alicia's stepfather Jonathon Daniels greeted him.
"Jonathon" Arthur said nodding to him.
"And this must be Mikaela" Gwen said being mindful of the girl's injury before seeing him.
"Been a while" Jack said neutrally she was not in his good books right now.
"Jack how's my knight in shadowy armour doing?" Alicia asked hugging him.
"I'm doing fine this must be Harold" Jack replied shaking Harold's hand both with forced smiles on their faces.
"Well have a seat now who is this?" Gwen asked.
"My friend Jade" Mikaela replied.
"Oh Ok but you didn't tell us you were inviting him" Jonathon said.
"Oh what was that you have a problem with me being here" Jack snarled.
"Jack Jonathon sit down" Gwen ordered.
"Listen Gwen you may be a good person but you are not in my good books at the moment" Jack said turning to her.
"Why because of my ex husband" Gwen said.
"Yes you kicked him out over a argument about a boy who no one should trust" Jack snarled.
"Tell me why should no one trust me" Harold said with an amused smile on his face.
"I'll tell you why you son of a bitch because you are the very reason I have this metal arm you are my enemy and I am yours you are Sectrilis" Jack growled he applauded.
"I knew my disguise would not fool you but look no one is listening not even Alicia heard you reveal my true-self Shadow Jedi" Sectrilis sneered walking up to him.
"I would recognize you from a mile away" Jack snarled.
"Harold Jack sit down now" Alicia ordered he turned and in his anger his fist collided with her face she fell a fearful look on her face people gasped and stared.
"Alicia I'm sorry I" Jack gasped.
"What happened to you?" she asked.
"Years without you" Jack replied and ran into the rain she followed.
"GO ON RUN SHADOW JEDI RUN AWAY FROM YOUR PAST AND SEE WHAT YOU'VE BECOME!" Sectrilis and Jonathon yelled.
"JACK PLEASE WAIT I'M SORRY!" Alicia cried and losing him she collapsed tears falling.
Back in his study Jack sat venting before he picked up his books and threw them screaming in frustration and anger.
"Jack are you alright?" Siri asked being brave enough (actually losing at rock paper scissors against Anakin and Obi-wan) to come up.
"I see her again and I fuck up" Jack growled sitting at his desk and working on homework he had been putting off Siri left.
"Well?" Anakin asked.
"He saw Alicia again and according to him fucked up" Siri replied breaking down Obi-wan began comforting her.
Harold growled he thought Jack striking her would make him hate her but no now all she was talking about was ways for him to forgive her he smirked perhaps he should take Jack's form and rape her he smirked feeling a plan rising.
"It's genius I tell Jonathon to send her to the milk bar and as she heads through the alleyway I jump out in Jack's form and rape her and then she will hate him HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He laughed evilly plan set.
Alicia sighed walking through the alleyway to the milk bar ever since the previous night her step father was unbearable she was tempted to run away to her father's and spend the night there her mind made up she turned around and Sectrilis grabbed her there was a flash and Jack ran past grabbing Sectrilis and throwing him against the fence punching him repeatedly.
"Go to George's now" he ordered throwing Sectrilis into another fence after punching his throat she nodded and ran once at his house she knocked on his door and he answered.
"Alicia your mother is going to be angry at you if you aren't here on a weekend" George said gently.
"Sectrilis tried to rape me in Jack's form" she said shakily and he led her inside.
"DAMN IT HOLMES YOU ALWAYS SPOIL MY PLANS!" Sectrilis yelled and went to force push him but Jack was faster and force pushed him back.
"YOU WILL LEAVE HER ALONE!" Jack yelled kicking him in the face he spat out blood.
"Go on then finish me" he mocked Lightsabre ignited and Jack ignited his.
"I'm through playing Sectrilis" Jack growled.
"Oh be still my heart" Sectrilis sneered charging Jack blocked and parried as they weaved through the alleyway.
"IT'S OVER SECTRILIS YOU LOST!" Jack yelled.
"It's only the beginning Holmes now BYE BYE!" Sectrilis yelled vanishing Jack screamed in anger his enemy got away again.
"ALICIA SIMPSON!" Gwen yelled glaring at her and George Alicia was glaring at Jonathon.
"YOU SET ME UP YOU BASTARD YOU SENT ME TO THE MILK BAR THROUGH THAT ALLEY AND SECTRILIS TRIED TO RAPE ME!" Alicia yelled.
"YOU WHAT!" George yelled angrily.
"IT WAS NOT MY FAULT YOU LITTLE SLUT!" Jonathon yelled at her there was a black flash and Jonathon was against the wall.
"If you ever insult her again you will die" Jack snarled but someone grabbed him.
"Ok enough is enough" Jack snarled angrily elbowing the impostor in the spine and kicking him in the face the disguise melted and Sectrilis stood yellow eyes glaring at him.
"I'M SICK OF YOU GETTING IN THE WAY EVERY SINGLE TIME!" Sectrilis roared George opened fire and Sectrilis was forced to retreat after nodding at her and knocking Jonathon unconscious and left.
"My lord?" Ravage asked warily.
"Get me the Holocrons of Bane and Aneddu and put them in the power absorber I need more power" Sectrilis ordered entering the receiving chamber and soon red energy flew into the chamber and a flaming beast walked out.
"I am Pyranos HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!" Pyranos laughed switching back into his Harold form Jack's eyes widened sensing it his fists clenched with his permission Anakin Obi-wan and Siri had left the planet to hide from any stormtroopers that had made their way to Earth which Jack killed now he had a super powered sith problem to deal with.
"Son of a bitch" Jack snarled deciding just this once to have a can of beer Anakin left behind and before Vader got to it but then Jack remembered Vader's furlough ended.
Over the next few weeks his friends tried to cheer him up again and again all Michael's idea all failed mainly because Jack wasn't around for them to work so Curtis deciding enough was enough decided to spy on Billanook during a free period.
"First George falls and then Holmes" Pyranos sneered Curtis's eyes widened.
"Jack I saw him Pyranos he is plotting to kill George and then you I'm heading to George's now" Curtis reported while riding his motorbike.
"On my way" Jack replied hanging up and jumping into his car and speeding out of the cave.
"Sir Scanlon was spying on you" a trooper reported.
"KILL HIM!" Pyranos roared and the troops obeyed his order and gave chase on their bikes.
"Scanlon you have troopers on your ass I'm trying to get a lock on them" Jack said activating his weapons and his targeting computer.
"Let's give these fuckers what they deserve" Curtis replied already heading through the wetlands as Jack fired a trooper exploded normally the wetlands would be a dangerous place for bike riders but he had ridden through them before and knew his way around the trees judging by the explosions the troopers were wiping out fast only two more followed which Jack shot and killed.
"George apologies for the interrupted lunch but Pyranos wants you dead" Jack said as the two arrived in a blaze of burning Sith trooper parts gunfire sounded and the three quickly got cover.
"Well I'll be darned the sith troopers are becoming good shots luckily HEY ARTHUR NOW'S THE TIME!" George yelled.
"I MISSED HEARING YOU SAY THAT NOW BOYS YAHOO!" Arthur yelled as the Sith troopers were quickly disposed off.
"Alright boys" Arthur said Jack noticed the fire coming towards them.
"Get down it'll pass over your heads" he said and they ducked as a nearby car exploded.
"OH DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING BY MYSELF AROUND HERE!" Pyranos roared then he heard beeping and one of Michael's bombs exploded in his face.
"YAHOO I TOLD YOU THREE GIRLS I'M GOOD!" Michael yelled to the watching Jade Mikaela and Alicia who was cursing herself.
"GO FOR IT JACK!" Alicia yelled Jack ignited his Lightsabre.
"YOU BET I'M ENDING THIS!" Jack yelled and charged and the duel to the death began Pyranos began throwing fireballs most hitting him soon Jack slashed Pyranos's brain open killing the dark lord before Jack fell unconscious himself he awoke in hospital.
"Oh thank god I nearly lost you" Alicia said hugging him.
"Oh shut up and kiss me already" he said placing a ring on her finger and she kissed him.
"Oh I love weddings drinks all around" Michael said cheerfully.
"FREEZE!" Ravage roared.
"Oh go get them" Alicia said Jack nodded and jumped into the corridor and after a rather one sided fight Ravage fell dead on the floor.
"Jack I wanted to blow him up" Michael whined Jack shrugged.
"If you want to blow something up go blow up a building scheduled for demolition" Jack said dismissively.
"He's feeling better already" Mikaela mused hand in hand with Curtis.
"Let me guess you proposed" Jack said Curtis nodded.
"Nothing like proposing post battle" Curtis replied Jack smiled at him.
"GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!" George yelled running into the room.
"What Dad did you finally arrest that bastard known as Jonathon" Alicia said.
"And I also arrested your mother for taking bribes" George replied.
"Good they can't interfere with our wedding" Jack said with a smile.
"EVEN MORE GOOD NEWS!" Arthur yelled running into the room.
"What is it this time?" Mikaela asked amusedly.
"We have three new recruits" Arthur said.
"Let me guess Anakin Skywalker Obi-wan Kenobi and Siri Tachi" Jack said dryly.
"And you are correct" Obi-wan said smiling.
"Of course I am" Jack replied dryly finally Cheered up at last.
A month later Jack Anakin and Curtis were running from a lot of angry Racoons.
"Who's bright idea was it to bring Evil racoons to a stag party?" Curtis asked.
"ANAKIN!" Jack yelled in exasperation.
"What?" he asked.
"I remember Kashyyk where you found a bunch of racoons which you somehow pissed off and now they are back for revenge" Jack snarled a bomb flew in killing the racoons.
"HELL YEAH I'M LIKE DEADSHOT!" Michael yelled they burst into laughter all was well.
Jack: And this is the end of the story I'll upload it later.