A/N: Mew-Mew is my own invention. I'm pretty sure Sirius didn't own a kitten at Hogwarts.
3. Peppermints
'Padfoot!'
'What?'
'WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR KITTEN DOING WITH MY CHOCOLATE?'
'Don't insult Mew-Mew! Insult her and you insult The Marauders!'
'I AM A BLOODY MARAUDER!'
'Well observed, Moony.'
'YOU stay out of this, Prongs!
'Moony! I am hurt!'
'You will be hurt if you don't get the chocolate away from Padfoot's kitten!'
'Gasp! Prongs, you wouldn't hurt Mew-Mew, would you?'
'I would.'
'I am shocked, Wormtail! How could you?'
'Mew-Mew is evil, Padfoot. Just like Snivellus!'
'Speaking of which… Evans! Go out with me?'
'Prongs… a) Lily isn't even here. b) How does Snape being evil relate to you asking her out?'
'Good points, all of them. a) There's this fascinating thing called owl post. b) Evans is with Snivellus all the time – and you will call him by his proper name!'
'Well - a) But you didn't use owl post. You yelled. b) Okay, I give in – and I am calling him by his proper name!'
'No, but I got an answer. Here – "Dear Potter, you arrogant toe-rag," - she said "dear"!'
'Keep reading.'
'Okay – "When Flitwick becomes six feet tall! (Not so) Sincerely, Lily,"-hmm, Moony, how do I make Flitwick tall?'
'Well, you could – NOT THE PEPPERMINTS, YOU SPAWN OF SATAN!'
'Mew-Mew! Good kitty!'
'Padfoot, you will not live to join the Order of the Phoenix…'
'Prongs, Wormtail, what say I start running?'
'Probably a good idea.'
'Go for it, Padfoot! Follow your dreams!'
'Aw, thanks Wormtail – GOTTA GO!'
'There goes a troubled young man.'
'He never had a chance.'
'Ho-hum.'