Two weeks have gone by now- two weeks since my whole world came crashing down on me again. To my surprise, I'm hardly ever picked on anymore. People still stare and murmur things but I've learned to ignore them completely. I'm not the same Clary I was a week ago. I'm cold and neutral. I prefer not to talk to people who annoy me and I don't tolerate those that do. I've even distanced myself a bit from Simon and Isabelle and Magnus. Why did a boy of all things do this to me? How is that possible?
I hear my alarm go off again and I peel myself from the covers and turn the thing off. I get dressed in a Brandy Melville Los Angeles T-shirt and a pair of black ripped skinny jeans and white studded gladiator sandals. I do my makeup and hair and then grab my sunglasses and leave the house. When I get to school, I try to find Simon and Isabelle. I haven't really hung around Magnus that much because he has become a little "friendly" with Alec Lightwood if you know what I mean and we just don't really talk anymore. We still say hey in the hall and things but Mags eats with Alec and that crowd now- but I don't mind. Alec is friendly enough.
Isabelle finds me before I find her and says, "I love that shirt! Okay, so can we PLEASE talk about how cute Finn Markey is?!" I laugh and roll my eyes.
"Well, let me start, his eyes are creepy and they linger on you too long- staring issue. The amount of oil in his hair could fuel a car for 50 miles, and his breath smells like egg and cheese ALL THE TIME! Good enough for you?" she rolls her eyes and giggles.
"Whatever Clary!" she says still laughing. I give a smug smile but don't say anything back.
"Come on, let's go to class," I say to her and she groans. I put my stuff away in my locker and stride over to Art where my favorite people in the world will be. As I sit down I see Sebastian Verlac, Jace, Seelie, and Kaelie walk in all at the same time. Kaelie is flanked on Jace's arm but he seems a bit agitated at her which causes me to laugh and then divert my eyes to the window where the early signs of fall are starting to show.
I am disrupted when I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around and my eyes go cold. "What the hell do you want Sebastian?" I spit his name out like it was venom but he doesn't seem to notice or care.
"Well, the fall mixer is coming up- as you know- and I would be SO GRATEFUL if you were to accompany me." I scoff and roll my eyes at him.
"No thank you. I have better things to do."
He smirks but fakes hurt and says, "Oh darling, you're breaking my heart here! Come on, please go?"
I spin around again and say, "No Sebastian! Now, do us both a favor and make out with Seelie! Then you can go with her and maybe, she'll let you have sex with her behind the bleachers!" I spin back around, leaving him shocked as well as Jace and the girls. And that is what I mean by "intolerant of people who annoy me."
I hear him move away from behind me and I start to draw the single tree that stands depressingly by itself outside the window. "That's pretty good," says a silky voice.
"Go the hell away Jace," I say with as much hatred as possible.
"Damn, I didn't know that in order to get on your good side, compliments were a big NO."
I glare at my hands and say darkly, "There is no way in hell that you are ever going to get on my 'good side.' So why don't you just go away, make out with your girlfriend and wait for your freakin prom cause you are getting nowhere here!" I look at him and he looks truly hurt by my words but quickly masks that with a smirk.
"See you later, Red," he says and gently nudges my shoulder. Great, I think, now I'm going to have to burn this shirt! I sigh into my seat as the bell rings and then I begin to draw whatever my mind thinks of.
School passes pretty quickly and then I have work- Yay. I walk into the café and greet the guys with a genuine smile and go to get my guitar. I come out and see that the normal crowd is here- including Sebastian and his crowd. "Uh, hey guys," I address to the band, "Playing for Keeps?" I offer. They all nod and I smirk.
You prayed to have your name, scattered on the lips of the young.
And now you claim, that it's you in the tips of their tongues.
If your proud of what you had to kill to get your thrill, well.
It must sting to Give up everything and realize that they don't want you.It's lonely road, where the forgotten go.
Where your misery finds it's company.
It's a long way down, to the, sacred grounds.
Where the reapers playing for keeps.Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.A hollow sound, is ringing where your heart used to be.
Have you found, that the admiration will never set you free?
Get your lies prepared, your next in line for judgments day.
Now, aren't you prayin' aren't you begging that it's anyone else?It's a lonely road, where the forgotten go.
Where your misery finds it's company.
It's a long way down, to the, sacred grounds.
Where the reapers playing for keeps.Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.Well I bet you're sorry now.
You did this to yourself.
Well I bet you're sorry now.
Well aren't you sorry now?It's lonely road, where the forgotten go.
Where your misery finds it's company.
It's a long way down, to the, sacred grounds.
Where the reapers playing for keeps.Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.It's lonely road, where the forgotten go.
Where your misery finds it's company.
It's a long way down, to the, sacred grounds.
Where the reapers playing for keeps.Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
I let a small giggle pass my lips after the last verse. Everyone claps and I sneak a peek at Jace who seems impressed and is looking at me in admiration. I scoff and brush it off as we begin to play more songs.
We end after about an hour and a half of playing and my throat is raw and my voice is husky. I put my guitar away and help put up amps. I am closing the door when I feel a familiar warm hand on my shoulder. I turn around and place my back at the door. "What do you want Jace?" I ask coldly.
"I want to ask you why you're being like this… it's kind of unsettling for me."
I tilt my head at him and furrow my eyebrows. "Unsettling for YOU? What in the world kind of bullshit is THAT!? YOU cheated on ME. YOU told everyone that WE slept together! Maybe it's my fucked up judge of character, but I think I have a perfect reason to be acting the way I am! I mean, it's not like I have people at home to settle me down, or did you forget that too? No… no you couldn't have… because you told EVERYONE that too!" I shove past him and start towards the door until I feel a rough hand grip onto my wrist. We are in the middle of the café but I don't care, I've been waiting to blow up at him for ages.
"You don't even want to listen to what I have to say?!" he asks incredulously.
My voice is still a little husky and now it is starting to shake with the warning of tears. "No, no I don't! I let you in and you judged me! I told you everything and you judged me! You told people. You are an asshole and I hope I never have to see you again." I hear people clap and whistle at my outburst and I am able to wring my wrist form Jace's clutch. I walk out of the café and away from the applauding crowd.
Later that night-
Izzy texted me:
Way to go grl! I am so proud! ;)
I raise my eyebrows in curiosity and suspicion and I reply,
What are you talking about?
Just watch the video! Apparently someone at Java caught you on video! It's awesome!
She sends me a video and I watch it. It's a video of mine and Jace's fight earlier today. The person didn't get the whole thing but you can hear me say, "I let you in and you judged me! I told you everything and you judged me! You told people. You are an asshole and I hope I never have to see you again!
I give a small laugh and silently pat myself on the back in my choice of words. Now everyone knows better than to mess with me.
A/N: okay, I got a little inspiration from Silver Linings Playbook. If you have seen that movie, you probably know which part. If you haven't seen the movie- WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!? No, just kidding, but seriously you should watch it.
The song is Playing for Keeps, by. Elle King
Chapter 2 songs- the scientist, by. Coldplay
Skinny Love, by Bon Iver
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